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Where Have all the Neurons Gone?

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Jerry:

--- Quote from: Chicago Tribune ---Ohio robbery suspect arrested after returning to home to ask victim for a date, police say

COLUMBUS, Ohio (AP) — Ohio police said a suspect in a robbery was arrested when he returned to the home about two hours later to ask the victim out on a date. Police say 20-year-old Stephfon Bennett of Columbus was among three men who robbed a couple late Sunday.

Columbus police Sgt. Sean Laird said the woman recognized Bennett as one of the robbers when he returned to ask her out. She had a relative call 911.

Police said Bennett was arrested in front of the home. He was arraigned Tuesday on a charge of aggravated robbery and was being held in the Franklin County jail on $100,000 bail.

A public defender had not yet been assigned to Bennett's case.
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--- Quote from: thisisjuststupid.com ---Mel Reynolds – You Can’t Make This Stuff Up!

Jesse Jackson has added former Chicago Democrat Congressman Mel Reynolds to Rainbow/PUSH Coalition’s payroll. Reynolds was among the 176 criminals excused in President Clinton’s last-minute forgiveness spree.

Reynolds received a commutation of his six-and-a-half-year federal sentence for 15 convictions of wire fraud, bank fraud, and lies to the Federal Election Commission. He is more notorious, however, for concurrently serving  five years for sleeping with an underage campaign volunteer.

This is a first in American politics: An ex-congressman who had sex with a subordinate…won clemency from a president who had sex with a subordinate…then was hired by a clergyman who had sex with a subordinate!

His new job? Ready for this?? YOUTH COUNSELOR!  It’s true.  You can check it here: _http://www.snopes.com/politics/sexuality/reynolds.asp
--- End quote ---


--- Quote from: thisisjuststupid.com ---Texas Man Trying to Cash $360 Billion Check Arrested

FORT WORTH, Texas – Charles Ray Fuller must have been planning one big record company.

The 21-year-old North Texas man was arrested last week for trying to cash a $360 billion check, saying he wanted to start a record business, authorities said. Tellers at the Fort Worth bank were immediately suspicious — perhaps the 10 zeros on a personal check tipped them off, according to investigators.

Fuller, of suburban Crowley, was arrested on a forgery charge, police said. He was released after posting $3,750 bail.

Fuller said his girlfriend’s mother gave him the check to start a record business, but bank employees who contacted the account’s owner said the woman told them she did not give him permission to take or cash the check, according to police.

In addition to forgery, Fuller was charged with unlawfully carrying a weapon and possessing marijuana, Fort Worth police Lt. Paul Henderson said.  Officers reported finding less than 2 ounces of marijuana and a .25-caliber handgun and magazine in his pockets, police said.

Fuller couldn’t be located for comment by The Associated Press on Friday because there were no phone listings for him in the Fort Worth area.



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Zadius Sky:

--- Quote from: pal-item.com ---
_http://www.pal-item.com/article/20090918/NEWS01/909180302&referrer=FRONTPAGECAROUSEL

Officers sniff out pot, gun

26-year-old visits RPD for permit, but marijuana odor arouses suspicion, leads to arrest

BY MIKE BENNETT
STAFF WRITER

Mitchel L. Legg got the $50 back that he paid Thursday with his application to carry a gun.

He also was arrested on a charge of carrying a gun without a license.

Legg visited the Richmond Police Department at 11:30 a.m. to fill out an application.

Officers and staff members noticed a heavy smell as he was doing the paperwork.

"He reeked of marijuana, so they patted him down," said Chief Kris Wolski. "Officers (Heather) Edwards and (John) Lackey were aware that things just didn't add up. It's a good thing they did."

That's because the patdown discovered that besides marijuana, Legg was carrying a .22 semiautomatic handgun.

"It (gun) was in a little nylon holster under his shirt," Wolski said.

Legg, 26, of 327 S. W. 17th St., was arrested and lodged in Wayne County Jail at 12:15 p.m. on a Class D felony charge of possession of marijuana and a Class A misdemeanor charge of carrying a handgun without a license.

He was released after posting a $750 cash bond.

Wolski signs all gun permit requests after the information is verified and the applicant qualifies.

Some people are refused because of past criminal offenses, but he can't remember someone being arrested in a similar situation to Legg's.

Wolski doesn't expect to see Legg's gun permit application.

"I said we may as well give him his filing fee back," he said.

Wolski said more people are coming to the department to request permits. Last year, he estimated 12 to 15 were processed each week.

"It's way up from what it's been," Wolski said. "I've had times when we've had that many in a day."

He said many of the applicants cite rumors that the change in presidents will toughen gun laws.

"It instantly went up (after the November election)," he said.


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--- Quote from: wired.com ---
_http://www.wired.co.uk/news/archive/2009-09/17/zombies-good,-god-bad-when-dating-online.aspx

Zombies good, God bad when dating online

By Lewis Wallace


Making a positive first impression on a potential mate can be as easy as dropping the words "zombie" or "atheist" into your opening salvo on an online dating site.

Making spelling errors, being too forward, slipping into sloppy internet slang or simply mentioning "God" can doom your chances for making that crucial first connection. (Referencing "Allah" or "Jesus" is OK, apparently.)

These are just some of the fascinating results compiled by online dating site OkCupid.com after crunching numbers on 500,000 first contacts between singles.

The results of the online dating study, published Monday on OkCupid's OkTrends blog, supply would-be romantics with a handful of specific dos and don'ts for navigating the stormy waters of virtual romance.

Sam Yagan, co-founder and CEO of the site, boiled down the secrets to success in an e-mail to Wired. "Be specific," he said. "Be brief. Make a reference to the recipient's profile."

Moves that practically ensure failure: commenting on the recipient's physical appearance and offering or soliciting personal contact information.

A previous OkTrends post on optimum message length pointed to the importance of brevity. "The combination of a high level of detail in a very short first message is a bit of a surprise," Yagan said.

These are the study's seven key findings:

1. Be literate
Don't use the "fool's lexicon" of netspeak no-nos like "ur," "ya" and "realy."

2. Avoid physical compliments
Saying your potential date looks "sexy" or "beautiful" might seem like a good idea, but it's not.

3. Use an unusual greeting
"How's it going?" and "howdy" are in; "hi" and "hello" are out.

4. Don't try to take it outside
Even mentioning chat, e-mail or instant messaging can ding your chances of connecting, according to the study.

5. Bring up specific interests
Professing your devotion to heavy metal, videogames, zombies or vegetarianism can really pay off.

6. If you're a guy, be self-effacing
Confidence doesn't necessarily pay off for men online, the study finds. Instead, try a little fence-sitting. "It could be that women like guys who write mumbly," the study concludes.

7. Consider becoming an atheist
Mentioning most religious views pays off positively, but going godless pays off most handsomely. Dropping the words "atheist," "Allah" or "Jesus" are good; mentioning "God" has a negative effect.

OkCupid was founded by maths graduates, Yagan said, so the study contains plenty of statistics. But the full results make for an entertaining read – it's far from a dry scientific paper.

"All three of my co-founders are mathematically inclined, so we were able to handle the statistics correctly ourselves," Yagan said. "To give you a sense of how we've woven math into everything we do, check out our matching algorithm."

In a privacy statement posted with the study's results, the company maintained that all messages were anonymised, "with sender and recipient data, and all IP and timestamp information stripped out."

"Our Python jam program looked at messages only two or three words at a time, to track the success of certain words or phrases (like 'what's up' vs. 'wats up')," according to the statement. "The program then aggregated results by phrase before presenting the data; no one at OkCupid has read any actual user messages, or indeed any user-written phrase longer than five words, to compile this post."

Yagan said OkCupid, which launched in 2004 and has 3.3 million unique users, will definitely be watching to see if users take the advice to heart – and to see what happens if they do.

"What we're especially interested in here is to see if there's something about the people who write the 'good' messages besides the messages themselves that's driving the high response rate," Yagan said. "In other words, imagine if interesting people have an easier time writing about their hobbies, what will happen when boring people write about their (boring) hobbies?"


--- End quote ---



--- Quote from: The Associated Press ---
_http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/U/US_ODD_HURLING_BALLS?SITE=KFWB&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT

Man cited for peppering Southern California national park with 3,000 golf balls

RIVERSIDE, Calif. (AP) -- A man who said he hurled thousands of golf balls into Joshua Tree National Park for more than a year to honor deceased golfers will be explaining his tribute to a federal magistrate.

Park rangers cited 57-year-old Douglas Jones for abandoning property, littering and feeding wildlife. Park spokesman Joe Zarki said Wednesday that Jones tossed some 3,000 golf balls from his vehicle.

Jones also scattered a few tennis balls and park literature and left fruit and vegetables along park roads. Jones says rangers spent 370 hours cleaning up, at a cost of $9,000.

Finally spotted in action last month, Jones allegedly told rangers he threw the golf balls to leave his mark and honor deceased golfers. The food was for stranded hikers.


--- End quote ---

Jerry:
Good catch Myrddin!

Jerry:

Jerry:

--- Quote from: Associated Press-September 28, 2009 ---Mass. man sentenced to 18 months in prison after stealing a hot dog with pellet gun

WORCESTER, Mass. (AP) — A Massachusetts man who stole a hot dog from another man sitting under a tree in a park has been sentenced to 18 months in prison. Antonio Judd pleaded guilty Monday in Worcester Central District Court to charges including larceny from a person. Police said Judd grabbed the hot dog in August after flashing what appeared to be a gun in Elm Park in Worcester, New England's second-largest city.

Police reports say Judd began to devour the hot dog, spilling mustard all over his shirt. They say when he was arrested later he was carrying a pellet gun and a pocket knife.

Records show Judd has been sentenced to prison at least three times for offenses including assault and vandalism.
--- End quote ---


--- Quote from: Stonnington Leader ---Money for nothing in Malvern
by Kate Bruce-Rosser

PROMISES that special chemicals could duplicate money have allegedly duped a Malvern business.

Police said three Victorian businesses gave about $160,000 in cash to two men in the belief their money would double when soaked in chemicals.

A supermarket receipt, uncovered during investigations, has since revealed the chemicals’ formula as bleach, baby powder and hair spray.

Police said the two men would conduct the “procedure” out of sight each time, transfer the money into their possession, then wrap up worthless paper in aluminium foil or another non-see-through casing.

Detective Sgt Andrew Healey said the Malvern business owners were told to leave the wrapped package for 24 hours while the chemical worked.

Police arrested and charged two Caroline Springs men, aged 23 and 25, on Friday, September 11, after being alerted by the owners who had become suspicious and opened the package to find no money.

It is understood the pair initially expressed an interest in buying a Malvern bottle shop and formed a rapport with the owners.

After some time, the offenders told the owners they had chemicals that could duplicate bank notes.

Police said the men “demonstrated” their claim by placing a $100 note between sheets of black paper, which they described as “special material”, and pouring a liquid substance over the top.

When the sheets of paper were separated, a second $100 note was inside, which the businessmen verified as genuine at the bank.

The owners then agreed to provide $10,000 each to be chemically treated.

Two other businesses were also deceived by a similar scam, losing $20,000 and $120,000.

Police said the bottle shop owners had not committed an offence.

The two men charged with theft will appear at Melbourne Magistrates’ Court on October 19.
--- End quote ---


--- Quote from: dailymail.co.uk ---Prison officer zaps children with 50,000-volt stun gun 'to show them what a day at work is like'
By Jacqui Goddard

Prison officer Walter Schmidt wanted to give his colleagues' children a taste of what their mums and dads get up to at work while showing them around a Florida jail.

So to make the youngsters' experience all the more realistic as they toured Franklin  Correctional Institution during the lock-up's 'Take our Daughters and Sons to  Work Day', he decided to zap them with his 50,000-volt stun gun.

The jolt sent at least two of them sprawling to the floor, crying out in pain and clutching at agonising burns on their arms. One child ended up in hospital.

But 37-year-old Schmidt told officials who later fired him that he had only been trying to show the children - whose parents all work at the jail near Tallahassee - what a typical day involves while handling unruly inmates.

'It wasn't intended to be malicious, but educational,' he explained  to the St Petersburg Times.

'The big shock came when I got fired.'

Sgt Schmidt, who had served as a jailer for 14 years and was in charge of the prison  arsenal, claims that he had asked permission from the children's parents for the  stunt. 'When they said "Sure" I went ahead and did it,' he shrugged.

Florida's Secretary of Corrections, Walter McNeil, has ordered an  investigation into the incident.

The stun gun Schmidt used, known as an electronic immobilisation device, delivers a shock up to 450 times stronger than the current in a household electric socket.

It must be held directly on the victim's body to deliver a shock - unlike a Taser, which fires dart-like electrodes into the skin from a distance. The charge disrupts a person's nervous system, causing involuntary muscle contractions that leave them temporarily  immobilised.

Duffie Harrison, the chief warden at Franklin Correctional Institution, told Schmidt in a letter that he had 'engaged in inappropriate conduct while demonstrating weapons to several kids during a special event at the institution.'

'Your retention would be detrimental to the best interests of the state,' the letter  advised.



Read more: _http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1176891/Prison-officer-zaps-children-50-000-volt-stun-gun-day-work-like.html#ixzz0SabOyyNA
--- End quote ---

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