Esoterica > The Work

What programs have YOU discovered?

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TheManyShadesOfJo:
This forum truly is an excellent mirror, so what better way to advance in our own Work by learning about the programs others have detected and are working on overcoming.

For myself, a major one that has recently been brought to my full awareness is "good children are seen and not heard", first installed by my Irish Catholic, ex-RAF pilot, bitter ol' bully of a grandfather (who has mellowed nicely over the years, I must add). This was re-inforced by the fact that my parents really didn't get on, my dad was away most of the time anyway so there was no communication between them and hence no communication to my brother and I. There was very little talk, warmth or laughter in my home,  just strained civility and quiet frustration (which my poor brother was pretty oblivious to, they'd "make happy" for his "benefit"). My (older) brother was high-strung and attention-seeking, which meant I was just kind of left to get on with it most of the time. This did give me a chance to cultivate a rich inner life, and I started reading novels young so I had strong language skills and deep thoughts, but little skill or experience in verbalising them. This was further re-inforced by the fact that I'd always be asked to read to the class or read bible passages at assemblies - when I did get the chance to be heard, it was always other people's material.

Fortunately for me, I have always had an outlet in singing and writing. Singing to pour out my emotions and writing to express them. Still I used to be very shy, quiet, withdrawn; well, fine with 1 on 1 conversations with compatible people (perhaps because it resembled my inner dialogue) but when it came to a group setting, I just wanted to be invisible and observe. It's only in the last 5 or so years (i'm 23) that I have come out of my shell and have realised that I do have something to contribute. The old programming still kicks in from time to time; I clam up when I'm rattled, sometimes getting completely tongue-tied or sometimes word salad comes out, words tripping over each other; I don't stick up for myself nearly enough; and find it very, very hard to freestyle lyrics - my mind just goes blank. I'm getting there though, and I'm so glad I found this place - its just what I need to shed the program and hone my communication skills :D

I'm very interested in hearing about your experiences, for in each other we will surely see ourselves.

Mrs. Tigersoap:
I remember reading Gurdjieff saying one should start with little things and so I try during the day to observe my habits. Whether it be the sequence I wash under the shower, the same spot on the sofa i always sit on, my (strange) habit of always caressing my lips with my finger (and sometimes 'writing' stuff on my lips with my finger - don't ask..), etc.

I try to see the reason behind these actions and if cannot find any, try to stop them altogether. Because when I first began to do this, I discovered that some things which seem mechanical are sometimes motivated by common sense. For example, you might always sit on the same spot, but maybe it allows you to see your daughter in her room AND the potatoes boiling on the stove.

I'm also aware of a little more complicated program called 'Fear of Not Being Able to Buy a Home'. I know it's ridiculous and know I'm running the program as soon as it shows up, but once it's running, I have great difficulty stopping it. I live in an area where the price of housing is beginning to be really worrying and where it is pushed in your face every day. "Buy NOW or else it may not be possible for you". It is of course just a marketing trick because they probably feel the bubble is gonna burst and they need to make the money now, but prices have trippled in 6 years, and so you tend to believe them. Why is it so important to buy a house or appartment to me? So that I'm sure to pay the same rent for the next 25 years or so (if you choose the fixed interest rates i mean) and because, contrary to my parents who were narcissists who only thought of their selfish, immediate pleasures, I want to be able to give something to my daughter. I know the situation in the States with the real estate for the moment, and I guess that even owning a house doesn't mean you're gonna be able to pass it to your children (and anyway, in 2012, we're all gonna ride the wave, right? ;) but that's a program I've had the most difficulty with so far. It plays on fear and safety, the worst programs in my opinion.

So that's two of the many programs I trying to work on ...

Ruth:

--- Quote from: TheManyShadesOfJo ---For myself, a major one that has recently been brought to my full awareness is "good children are seen and not heard"
--- End quote ---
Wow!!!  I remember that one, only it sounded like:  "Children should be seen and not heard".  Sounds like something straight out of the Victorian era which is probably where it came from.  Can't believe my parents actually said that.  Maybe they fell through a time warp or something.  Definately missed out on the sixties those two.  :D

And as a consequence, I find myself 'nicely' programed to be as anti-authoritarian as possible.  Its amazing some of the total garbage we grow up with.  And how resistant we are at getting rid of it - or even seeing it in the first place.

Puck:
A big one for me is "Be Nice" or "Be Cool", it's a social program that prods me to do the "socially acceptable" thing in any given situation. IE, my cell phone rings after work, and even if i have stuff to do I'll pick it up and opt to hang out with the friend who called.  

I also have this "disperse knowledge" program, which is also kinda a pain because sometimes i disperse to people who just don't want to hear it. IE, my mom constantly complains about our family dogs' behavior, or about her weight, or about some computer process she doesn't understand - If i try to explain how she could resolve it on her own she brushes me off an offers a lame excuse as to why she couldn't possibly resolve the situation without help.

so those are two i've found, fwiw.

Zadius Sky:
I have found quite a few programs and learned what they are, and I reckon that there will always be more to discover.  Once you found out the obvious programs, the 'tricky' or back-up programs will seep in.  

I think I've discovered couple of them through my interaction with my former friend 'Rachel' as I first discussed about her in this thread: A Warning Dream and summed it together in this post: http://www.cassiopaea.org/forum/index.php?topic=6596&p=2 where I also discovered 'jumping before looking' program (kinda like 'acting before thinking').  I also learned whenever fear comes up, I'd need to step back and try to think what programs were being activated at that moment (which, btw, is not easy to do).

I think I have "I like rice, dang it" program, but it may be cravings.

Natural tendencies very much are programs as well, imo.

fwiw.

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