This was too strong of an experience not to write about...
Now, I've been feeling sick for many weeks now (posted on magnesium miracle thread) but finally a few days ago I felt the physical symptoms going away (mostly phlegm in my sinuses/throat). This was replaced by a strange sadness I couldn't quite identify. I've long since suspected that I DO have strong emotional responses to things, but they somehow are suppressed (partly due to my upbringing in a scary environment, or so I believe).
On many occasions I've tried to "lure" or "stimulate" feelings for situations/people/happenings I KNOW should be very sad to me, but with no effect - no tears. Sometimes I've succeeded "getting through" to my emotions after a longer breathing-meditation. And I don't mind the "hard work" that it demands...it's just that I don't always have the time (sorry this oldest of excuses!) to meditate.
So, anyways, as I've told you I've been feeling sad, but haven't been able to "get it out". This evening I was driving home from work and I just happened to turn on the car radio. I usually don't listen to any music in the car, but this time I felt I needed some "distraction". And after some quick searching I heard this amazingly touching voice singing Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah". Now, I've heard this song before sung by Cohen himself, but never by this man, Jeff Buckley - and OMG was this a experience!
In my line of work I hear singers all the time, and I've also try to teach my own singing pupils to "sing with a true feeling". However, I've seldom been moved so much by a performance as this. I could be fooled of course by Jeff, but I don't care, his singing and this song REALLY wakes up something deep emotional in me. I was weeping all the way home in the car (almost an hour), and at home I wept some more...still sobbing
It is strange: even though I'm very sad (for the many things flying through my brain right now, and for things I even don't recognize) I feel liberated - I know that my "emotional center" is finally working! I feel it was not so much the lyrics (all though the lyrics also triggered something) but the overall feeling of the melody and Jeff's "commitment".
For those of you not familiar with this interpretation of "Hallelujah", here goes (I recommend listening to it without watching the screen):
_http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnJ-4p9fYxg&feature=related
p.s. I was sad to learn that Jeff Buckley has passed away.
Now, I've been feeling sick for many weeks now (posted on magnesium miracle thread) but finally a few days ago I felt the physical symptoms going away (mostly phlegm in my sinuses/throat). This was replaced by a strange sadness I couldn't quite identify. I've long since suspected that I DO have strong emotional responses to things, but they somehow are suppressed (partly due to my upbringing in a scary environment, or so I believe).
On many occasions I've tried to "lure" or "stimulate" feelings for situations/people/happenings I KNOW should be very sad to me, but with no effect - no tears. Sometimes I've succeeded "getting through" to my emotions after a longer breathing-meditation. And I don't mind the "hard work" that it demands...it's just that I don't always have the time (sorry this oldest of excuses!) to meditate.
So, anyways, as I've told you I've been feeling sad, but haven't been able to "get it out". This evening I was driving home from work and I just happened to turn on the car radio. I usually don't listen to any music in the car, but this time I felt I needed some "distraction". And after some quick searching I heard this amazingly touching voice singing Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah". Now, I've heard this song before sung by Cohen himself, but never by this man, Jeff Buckley - and OMG was this a experience!
In my line of work I hear singers all the time, and I've also try to teach my own singing pupils to "sing with a true feeling". However, I've seldom been moved so much by a performance as this. I could be fooled of course by Jeff, but I don't care, his singing and this song REALLY wakes up something deep emotional in me. I was weeping all the way home in the car (almost an hour), and at home I wept some more...still sobbing
It is strange: even though I'm very sad (for the many things flying through my brain right now, and for things I even don't recognize) I feel liberated - I know that my "emotional center" is finally working! I feel it was not so much the lyrics (all though the lyrics also triggered something) but the overall feeling of the melody and Jeff's "commitment".
For those of you not familiar with this interpretation of "Hallelujah", here goes (I recommend listening to it without watching the screen):
_http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnJ-4p9fYxg&feature=related
p.s. I was sad to learn that Jeff Buckley has passed away.