Introvert and Extrovert

Are introverts more STO aligned because they gain energy from being alone and Extroverts more STS aligned because they gain energy from interacting with other people? Then I am sure there are people will alittle of both Intro and Extro.

So this network is STS????
The concept of thos polarities goes beyond just introvert and extrovert.

Menna said:

Are introverts more STO aligned because they gain energy from being alone and Extroverts more STS aligned because they gain energy from interacting with other people? Then I am sure there are people will alittle of both Intro and Extro.

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There are also Ambiverts: people who lead when leading is necessary, and become Introverted when Extroversion is not needed. (Had a guy class me as this once.) ;)

Fwiw, I don't think being outgoing or more of a silent type matters regarding a person's Being. We are all STS until the Wave hits or we make the choice to become something else.

menna, this is an esoteric-type forum which serves a sort of environment for encouraging the growth of knowledge and being. It might benefit you to consider that a question like that disallows a given person to be somewhere on a scale of human variability. Instead, it prefers people to be in neat little boxes. Have you read the Big 5 yet?

Just curious.

I know there are people that gain energy from being alone by being by themselves and others that feed off or gain energy from others. I also believe that some people are more aligned to STO then others. My question is are the ones who gain energy by themselves more aligned to STO then the ones who gain from others (talking, interacting) I know we are all STS thats why I said aligned and I meant introvert and extrovert in the sense of Introverts do more and live more with and by themselves and extroverts interact with others more needing or wanting to be around others.

You may wish to investigate your assumptions about introverts/extroverts which don’t seem to agree with the common definitions of the terms:

[quote author=Kernerman English Multilingual Dictionary © 2006-2010]introvert
n introvert
a person who is more concerned with his own thoughts and feelings than with other people or happenings outside him.

extrovert
n / adj extrovert
(a person) more interested in what happens around him than his own ideas and feelings An extrovert (person) is usually good company[/quote]

[quote author=Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged] introversion n
1. (Psychology) Psychol the directing of interest inwards towards one's own thoughts and feelings rather than towards the external world or making social contacts
(one's interests) upon oneself.

extrovert, extravert n
(Psychology) a person concerned more with external reality than inner feelings[/quote]

Menna said:

I know there are people that gain energy from being alone by being by themselves and others that feed off or gain energy from others. I also believe that some people are more aligned to STO then others. My question is are the ones who gain energy by themselves more aligned to STO then the ones who gain from others (talking, interacting) I know we are all STS thats why I said aligned and I meant introvert and extrovert in the sense of Introverts do more and live more with and by themselves and extroverts interact with others more needing or wanting to be around others.

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If we know that STS desires exclusion and separateness, then I don't think introverted behavior would necessarily equate with being more aligned with STO. The same goes with extroverted behaviors, just because one gains energy from being around others I don't means that one is necessarily feeding. Perhaps the key here is balance between the two - being able to discern when and how to be around others in a way that is not feeding and knowing when and how to keep one's own company. So it would seem that introversion and extroversion are really two sides of the same coin - one holds the potential to feed off others, the other holds the potential to feed off the self via thought loops. Not everyone falls neatly into these two categories. Some people fall into one category or another depending upon the specific situation.

As 3D beings, it is us that develop such categories in an attempt to simplify things we don't understand. They usually hold the flavor of "good"/"bad", "positive"/"negative". This flavor reflects our STSness as it's an attempt to foster separation.

Menna said:

I know there are people that gain energy from being alone by being by themselves and others that feed off or gain energy from others. I also believe that some people are more aligned to STO then others. My question is are the ones who gain energy by themselves more aligned to STO then the ones who gain from others (talking, interacting) I know we are all STS that's why I said aligned and I meant introvert and extrovert in the sense of Introverts do more and live more with and by themselves and extroverts interact with others more needing or wanting to be around others.

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Don't think that this is a cut and dry topic. Now I am not an expert so I can not truly give an answer. I don't think it is so simple to box a person in a category without full knowledge of their psychological background. Nor is either or more sts or sto. We are all sts as Gimpy stated above. We can only align ourselves towards sto and that in itself is a constant work in progress with a network of people aiding on the journey.

There are some tricky dynamics to this problem. Dabrowski wrote:

In the life experiences of individuals, who show such potentials for transformation, we will see, in the schizothymic and introvert types for example, a need for contact, for understanding others, and for empathy. In the extravert and cyclic types, we will observe a need for introversion, solitude, isolation, quietness and exclusiveness of emotional bonds. We will then be dealing with a combination of mental traits characteristics of contact introversion or meditative extraversion, both conducive to accelerated development.

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As they are, without much "mixing", they can both be epitomes of STS. Extroversion without any tendency to turn inward is basically psychopathy. And introversion without any meaningful contact with the world is schizoidal, asthenic, 'autistic'. Aspects of both are necessary for development.

IMO it is not that easy to define (in black and white), as often said: there is introversion and extraversion and the specific moment, which defines which is which.

Jerry said:

You may wish to investigate your assumptions about introverts/extroverts which don’t seem to agree with the common definitions of the terms:

[quote author=Kernerman English Multilingual Dictionary © 2006-2010]introvert
n introvert
a person who is more concerned with his own thoughts and feelings than with other people or happenings outside him.

extrovert
n / adj extrovert
(a person) more interested in what happens around him than his own ideas and feelings An extrovert (person) is usually good company

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[quote author=Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged] introversion n
1. (Psychology) Psychol the directing of interest inwards towards one's own thoughts and feelings rather than towards the external world or making social contacts
(one's interests) upon oneself.

extrovert, extravert n
(Psychology) a person concerned more with external reality than inner feelings[/quote]


[/quote]

That's interesting, imo it is also connected to internal considering, which then would lead to: what others think about me.

Menna said:

I know there are people that gain energy from being alone by being by themselves and others that feed off or gain energy from others. I also believe that some people are more aligned to STO then others. My question is are the ones who gain energy by themselves more aligned to STO then the ones who gain from others (talking, interacting)

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Sure, there are people who feed off of others by manipulating others in a social context; but also, there are people who are naturally more comfortable being around and interacting with others, maybe even energized by it, and thus tend to seek these situations. However, I don't think these are necessarily always the same thing. I think it is similar to sleep. Some might say sleep "gives a person energy", but I think it's maybe more accurate and likely that sleep allows a person's system to gather and utilize energy more effectively. So, the energy "gained" is the result of greater efficiency which results from doing what is naturally beneficial to the organism. In the same way, maybe some people's ability to collect and direct their energies is naturally strengthened by interacting and being with with others. For others, maybe their ability to do so is strengthened by interacting with and being by themselves. So they might be "energized", but it doesn't necessarily mean that they are "feeding" on those around them; maybe their ability to utilize their own energies gained from other sources is just being enhanced. This would seem fairly separated from whether a person seeks STS or STO, although, as always, the devil is probably in the details.

I think that, if someone wishes, there are ways to feed off of others that might work better for an introvert, and those that might work better for an extrovert. It might be tempting to think that extroverted people are more likely to be manipulators or abusers, but I think we should keep in mind that an introverted manipulator or abuser is probably harder to spot because they might tend to work more from the sidelines, indirectly.

I hope this helps, and if I'm wrong someone can "shout me down". :) ;)

Thanks for the reply's it seems that it isn't so cut and dry and doing the work means aligning yourself with STO in each situation. I guess if you throw away the 3D definition of extrovert and introvert the important thing is to be aware of the situation you are in and take a step back look at the forest not the trees then act in an STO type of way.

Another question. If I recognize a problem I don't react to it right away. But I look at what can unfold down the road and look at what would be best for me or the relationship I have with someone, look at what would be the best approach for all parties involved. So I put myself in the best situation possible for what I want. I go about it without hurting the other persons feelings but I am still thinking about what I want and what I think is best. I feel that this is still STS. I feel even if you are externaly considering someone you are still alittle bit STS because you are not only considering the other but you are also doing what is best for yourself. Are these feelings correct?

Menna said:

Thanks for the reply's it seems that it isn't so cut and dry and doing the work means aligning yourself with STO in each situation. I guess if you throw away the 3D definition of extrovert and introvert the important thing is to be aware of the situation you are in and take a step back look at the forest not the trees then act in an STO type of way.

Another question. If I recognize a problem I don't react to it right away. But I look at what can unfold down the road and look at what would be best for me or the relationship I have with someone, look at what would be the best approach for all parties involved. So I put myself in the best situation possible for what I want. I go about it without hurting the other persons feelings but I am still thinking about what I want and what I think is best. I feel that this is still STS. I feel even if you are externaly considering someone you are still alittle bit STS because you are not only considering the other but you are also doing what is best for yourself. Are these feelings correct?

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Pretty much. It is still STS because we will always be, as long as we are here, STS. The best you can do is strive to follow that part of you that is great instead of that part of you that is small. Small steps, until one day you turn around and realize you've walked up quite a steep hill.

On the subject of 'feeding', one might discover something interesting by observing two or more people having a conversation that is more than just an exchange of one-liners. Is there one who dominates the conversation? Is there one who keeps trying to say something but can't get a word in edgewise? How do the less active participants seem to feel after a few minutes...tired, bored, looking for escape, looking annoyed?

The dominator is feeding - drawing real energy from the attention of others. As the attention energy of someone drains, they become restless, bored, fidgety, etc and the dominator gains more energy as you can tell from his mood or behavior. In the online Wave, Laura even gave an example of seeing this dynamic between kids at a school.

Anyway, one example of external consideration I practice is to intentionally keep a conversation balanced to the extent I can. If I'm the more animated one, I encourage my listener to talk about as much as I do by asking questions if necessary. If the other person is the more animated talker, I find ways to participate in the conversation whether he likes it or not, but I do it in creative ways that make what I'm doing less obvious.

I figure it's better than just walking off, though I've been tempted often. :D

Bud said:

Anyway, one example of external consideration I practice is to intentionally keep a conversation balanced to the extent I can. If I'm the more animated one, I encourage my listener to talk about as much as I do by asking questions if necessary.

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That is externally considerate only if the less animated person wants to talk. Otherwise, you are determining how the conversation should go based on what you think - not necessarily what is easiest or best for them (and thus you).

Bud said:

If the other person is the more animated talker, I find ways to participate in the conversation whether he likes it or not, but I do it in creative ways that make what I'm doing less obvious.

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External consideration in this case would be to stay quiet and let the other person talk all they wanted, finding an exit point that is natural and not so abrupt as to make them uncomfortable (while not identifying with your discomfort). In other words, putting up with the 'unpleasing manifestations of others' without letting them know you are doing such a thing. This is what makes life easier on them (they get to do what they want to do), and you, because your energy is conserved, since most people like this aren't listening to you anyway, no matter how often you try to force them to. ;)