Fuhrer and Me

I don't know if it's because of the war going on, but i've been thinking a lot about a dream i had Last December these days. And it was unlike any other dream: in this dream, i am a young man. But i feel ME nonetheless. And these days, this young man has been in my mind:

I am sitting around a rectangle table with carved edges made of redish wood in a high ceiling room, full of tall windows but dim light. I am young man in german uniform. I believe i am important because it is a meeting where Hitler is sitted and i have various army ornaments on my jacket. The Fuhrer is talking, but he does so very slow and in a rombotic manner. I know that these are the last hours of this once great man; he is degenerating. I used to be very fond of him. Next to me sits a woman who keeps the meeting notes. She is the only one apart from me who understands what really goes on. When he stops talking, I speak to Hitler boldly (it seems we had good relationship) saying that these are the last days of our regime, we are loosing not only in power but we are also loosing our minds, we must not go about doing the last mass-killing that is planned. The whole conversation takes place in german (!), i call him Fuhrer. He looks at me disappointed. He turns left and whispers to who in my dream i know is the chief of SS (!). I know he told him to kill me. They all go out. We are in an old, huge building like a palace made of stone. Nobody tells me, but i know where to go and i walk to the basement. It is full of light, people and soldiers. The soldiers are killing the people who are running around. The light comes bright from the small windows. I know most of the people being killed are german. I just walk around watching people die. I feel no fear at all, i am extremely calm. A german woman is shot in the chest and blood leaves her mouth. As i walk, a bullet enters my body, right of my torso. No fear, no pain. As i start fading away, i slowly wake up.

The fact is, i decided not to pay attention to any of my dreams anymore, until i "tune" myself to reading them. But this one's been "haunting" me. You know what i wonder these days about this dream? Whether it's a past life memory dream. What do you all think? I would be devastated to know that i was a german soldier in WWII and because of me many died. But i feel "proud" of that young man/me in a way. Your feedback is appreciated.

irini.

That's a very interesting dream. In trying to offer feedback I can only say that it does not seem to be clear that you have more fuller knowledge of what brought you/young man into the position you were in as far as the Military. In my opinion who is to judge, was it programming, complete sickeness and following of hitler, your belief in Germany (your country/patriotism), all in the context of the idea that it is a past life memory, which it may not be.
It seems in the end you/young man showed your true colors even knowing perhaps that speaking up was not the thing to do (would get you killed), but you/young man stuck to your guns anyway instead of cowering down and accepting the lunacy of hitlers plan.
I was in the military and dream of military like things but never in the context of anything I know.. like physical laws are somewhat different.. maybe a topic for another time.
I got alot of flashes (imaginings) from reading what you wrote of how things were, the clothes the vehicles, the building and the room you/young man were in. That's a very interesting dream. I wish I had something to bring to the table, historic knowledge of such things having happened, though a person could easily bet and likely be correct that such things did/were happening in the last days of the WWII and maybe there is documentation. I can see how the dream could have an effect on you like that.
I know I believe in reincarnation though I have only the slightest glimpse of a memory or state of existence before this life. I'm actually going to try at some point to make a post about it though it is too difficult to really make coherent, osit. =\
-Steve M.

There is a thing about knowing yourself to be yourself in a dream. It is you. I wonder if the rectangle shapeped table is surrounded by twelve columns ... however that is neither her nor there - they wanted first to emulate percival, king arthur and the grail myth, and then pervert it. I would never want to stand against himler - chief SS, that cat knew more than hitler ... and he was twice as bad.
most of my life - well more accurately I have been held and haunted by my past lives ... I don't mind it so much, but it has always forced me to speak unusually to others and has left me a bit on the lonely side. No matter and I pray no pity from any that read that - also I learned great beauty. I was a polish jew and the son of a rabbi during the second world war. I lost my family and friends and was rescued by gypsies - gypsies of unusual descent and beliefs ... no biggie - I spent several years as their "toy" - hey if you're a gypsy what's more fun than a dude that is twice as stiff as ... well it doesn't matter - say well whgatever - They dragged me accross russia and taught me to lighten up in the face of losing my family. I love gypsies and respect them fully for both rescueing me and honnoring my sorrow for my family - and TEACHING ME TO DANCE!!! I have never held ill to hitler - it has been my opinion that he missed something ... as a "jew" well a partial jew who has been haunted his whole life by dreams ....
er - how do I explain?
Look I survived hitler and himler as a polish jew, I learned to dance because of gypsies that my dad instructed me to follow incompletely taught kabbalistic teachings - he would have taught me further but, things happened ...
sighs ...
there is much I can't easily express ... but ...
and this is important. YOU WOULDN'T BECOME INHUMAN. Look, regardless of who we were in the past it matters little ... It's who we are now that really matters. You should never under any circumstance ignore your dreams. You feel iffy and seem to understand why, but you want to hide from it all. You should never run from yourself like that - you know you do not feel happy about what you did and don't want to do it again. Some people would feel pride and do exactly the same thing. Now - even in your dream you say something telling - why is it that the furher looked at you all dissappointed like after bringing up mass-murder? Was it that you were too weak or too strong? I don't think I could be so honest about a dream as you just showed yourself to be - had I dreamed such I could not tell anyone - I would be terribly ashamed - but you did it in such a way that showed a measure of understanding and more than that - GREAT COURAGE! Good form Irini - mighty good form - for you saying such I'm confussed that you would be haunted by the memories of lifetimes past - you said it - you opened the box - you should be free of it ... your posts seem to offer greater insight than what I myself get - even in this case ... I'm confussed - I know you are too obviously, but by your words I see more reason why you should be less confused than I myself am ...

...
you know Irini - you earned my respect in a new way - a way that is foriegn to me - if I had been himlers cat and done -whatever ...

bleh ...

the thing is you did what you did and were as you were and admited it, but not in a psychopathic matter, but rather in a way that is deeper ... I don't quite get it I admit - and I'm not simply petting your ego either - you got me mighty curious - I know my faults and admit them freely - at least in person, but you have admited the worst kind of karmic fault openly and online - I respect that ... how and why come to mind, but I don't think you know those answers, I suspect that you did it to answer those questions, and that also is a mighty stance. Perhaps you have not directly and intentionally done so, but you did it none the less - whether or not you know it you have pulled off a wizard stance as my ancestors would say - why was merlin sad - why was noah a drunk???
lol
funny - but true
You sould neither be upset about the humans that died because you were a german nationalist or you should not feel overly relieved about those you saved Iniri - I have always been haunted by dreams, some karmic and some genetic, but so long as I and others learn what I have experienced too - well, there is no shame. Look Irini - WW2 was really bad for me, but I can in no way blame those for their partial understandings - and nor can you - and you MUST be able to recognize partial unerstanding ...
I may have been very well behaved durring WW2 - that wasn't always the case - I'm still human and terribly human besides ... I have been "iffy" - I am not perfect - I really want to be though ... just like everyone else
maybe tomorrow I'll be a perfect human - lol

noise said:

I wish I had something to bring to the table, historic knowledge of such things having happened, though a person could easily bet and likely be correct that such things did/were happening in the last days of the WWII and maybe there is documentation.

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Actually noise, this is a very good idea. To do research and find out facts about what happened during the last days of Hitler's regime. But to tell you the truth, during this lifetime i haven't been interested on the historical facts of that time. I don't even watch movies with Hitler or regarding WWII. I cried throughout Schildner's List (sp?) and i never understood why a movie like that had to be made. As if people don't know the monstrocities of war, as if there aren't enough wars going on anyway at all times, and we need a three hour visual and acoustic presentation of war. I felt the same about Saving private Ryan. Those introductory gulf war pictures were too much. And people sit in the theatres, eating pop-corn and are "entertained"! Plus their exposure to such scenes desensitizes them i think even to the non fiction news scenes of happening-at-this-time wars. Since i was a child i wished never to have to live through a war. My parents and their generation lived through the 1974 war in Cyprus. And we are always in a war "readines".

Sorry i am digressing noise, this war right now it really saddens, scares and angers me. all wars do: innocents die and go through tortures that no human should have to face, the earth and the sky are polluted, and no matter where it takes place we are ALL affected. And of course some are watching eating pop-corn...

Back to the dream, come to think of it now, if it's indeed a past life memory, i'll know for sure at one time, no? I am fascinated with the idea of remembering past lifes, but i always told myself "please don't remember yet, we are not ready!" :) But thinking that i might have been that young man, it strenghtens me in a way. Hey, if i did talk to Hitler like that, i cannot be intimidated by anyone ;)

highmystica said:

Look, regardless of who we were in the past it matters little ... It's who we are now that really matters.

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Actually that's very true and thank you for bringing it up.

And i don't see how writing the dream here was courageous in any way. Yes, i'd feel totally awful to know the horrible stuff i did in a past life, but i've done enough horrible things during this lifetime to worry more about. "It's who we are NOW that really matters". And i'll have to deal with those awful feelings, because i can do nothing to change THEN, but i can change my NOW, and perhaps this change in the NOW will change the THEN too.

I wasn't clear perhaps in what i was asking regarding the dream and i correct me now: i wanted feedback whether that dream was just a dream, or a past life experience. And how can one know. And i know i would know before anyone else could tell me. I don't trust my intuition yet. If many here think what i think, then my intuition might be correct.

I still have a very long way to go regarding my evolution, and my discernemnt skills are only beginning to form. I can't tell whether my dreams come from a benevolent or malevolent source. To enlighten or to confuse me. But if this dream makes me feel stronger somehow, it can't be that bad, right?

Btw, i am fond of Gypsies' dance and music. :)