Awake and aware singles

[Darquestarr]

Hola compadres,

I'm new to the forum but not this site or the Cassiopaean site. My ex-wife deemed this area of study to be negative and, in part, this is why we broke up. The information I attempted to share messed with her New Age "feel good" strategies. But this post is not about bashing her. As we all are, she's simply acting in accordance with her level of consciousness.

Newly single, I've surveyed quite a few internet dating sites and have come to the sad conclusion that 99% of the people on those sites are so caught up in the myths, illusions and distractions as to be completely oblivious to what's really happening around them. So, I had the bright idea of tapping this source of aware individuals to address this issue. A network for awake and aware singles via sott. Sound like a good idea? If this question has already been addressed please direct me to that thread.

Of course, the thought comes to mind that, maybe, I'm "supposed" to be single during this Endgame period. Time will tell. But it doesn't hurt to ask.

Thanks.

 

[anart]

Newly single, I've surveyed quite a few internet dating sites and have come to the sad conclusion that 99% of the people on those sites are so caught up in the myths, illusions and distractions as to be completely oblivious to what's really happening around them. So, I had the bright idea of tapping this source of aware individuals to address this issue. A network for awake and aware singles via sott. Sound like a good idea?

Nope - it sounds like a desperate attempt to feed, actually. It sounds like you need a food source and are hoping to find one here.

If this question has already been addressed please direct me to that thread.

No, not specifically, though many different manifestations of 'this question' have surfaced over the years. In almost all cases, the people who most desperately want to be in a relationship are those who benefit most by not being in a relationship.

Of course, the thought comes to mind that, maybe, I'm "supposed" to be single during this Endgame period. Time will tell. But it doesn't hurt to ask.

Why doesn't it hurt to ask? What are you really looking for? Why - with the world literally on fire and with time 'speeding up' as it were, is your main concern, and first post on this forum, dealing with 'dating'??????????

 

[Ruth]

Hola compadres,

I'm new to the forum but not this site or the Cassiopaean site. My ex-wife deemed this area of study to be negative and, in part, this is why we broke up. The information I attempted to share messed with her New Age "feel good" strategies. But this post is not about bashing her. As we all are, she's simply acting in accordance with her level of consciousness.

Yes, this is often a response from family members who 'chose not' to look at anything negative and does not limit itself to the 'New Age', but seems to be across the board. The comment "I chose to only look at the good in people was a comment from one of my family members. And yes, there is a certain 'drive' that humans have to find people with whom they have something in common. People who are interested in objective reality will probably find this harder than others because (I think) sts would, or should, be actively trying to discourgage people such as these from 'connecting'. :)

Newly single, I've surveyed quite a few internet dating sites and have come to the sad conclusion that 99% of the people on those sites are so caught up in the myths, illusions and distractions as to be completely oblivious to what's really happening around them. So, I had the bright idea of tapping this source of aware individuals to address this issue. A network for awake and aware singles via sott. Sound like a good idea? If this question has already been addressed please direct me to that thread.

I don't think this is a 'dating site'... and it would not be allowed to turn into one. But, I think you are right in recognising that most people on the dating sites 'out there' are totally caught up in some kind of self created illusion. I've often thought that to be 'successful' in finding a 'mate' on one of those, a person would be best presenting a cardboard cutout of them selves and see how that does. Quite well, I would think, because it seems that it what so many people are 'looking' for an illusion and not reality in any way form or shape.

Of course, the thought comes to mind that, maybe, I'm "supposed" to be single during this Endgame period. Time will tell. But it doesn't hurt to ask.

Depends what you mean by single. Relationships don't have to be all a certain 'type'. And I think you will find that most 'seekers of the truth' are not only lonely but feel 'single' most of the time. So much so, that I'm begining to think that this is more the norm than anything else. You should be looking at forming other types of relationships with people, other than romantic ones, as they are not encouraged here.

 

[Darquestarr]

Thanks for your replies, so far. There is no desperation for anything, here. Though I did mention internet dating sites, I never said I was looking for any sort of romantic hook-up nor was I suggesting that sott become a dating site. My intent and main concern is to create connections with people who "get it" rather than wasting my time on the "blue pill" people. If romance comes out of it, so be it. I'm completely prepared to make the rest of this journey solo but see nothing wrong with like-minded companionship, romantic or otherwise.

 

[Bernhard]

My intent and main concern is to create connections with people who "get it" rather than wasting my time on the "blue pill" people.

Hi Darquestarr, welcome!
Are you familiar with the "Wave Series"? Your mentioned before that you're not new to this site. Just wondering what you understand under the "blue pill people" as opposed to the "red pill people"(I suppose) and what do you mean by "get it"? I'm asking because your entry into this forum seemed a bit odd, considering the general focus and intent of this forum.

 

[Ryan]

My intent and main concern is to create connections with people who "get it" rather than wasting my time on the "blue pill" people.

What makes you think that anyone here "gets it"?

 

[ScioAgapeOmnis]

Newly single, I've surveyed quite a few internet dating sites and have come to the sad conclusion that 99% of the people on those sites are so caught up in the myths, illusions and distractions as to be completely oblivious to what's really happening around them. So, I had the bright idea of tapping this source of aware individuals to address this issue.

To address what issue? Your "singleness"? Why is that such an issue?

Of course, the thought comes to mind that, maybe, I'm "supposed" to be single during this Endgame period.

As Anart pointed out, maybe it would be helpful to address why you're so concerned over it?

Thanks for your replies, so far. There is no desperation for anything, here.

That doesn't jive at all with how you presented yourself.

Though I did mention internet dating sites, I never said I was looking for any sort of romantic hook-up nor was I suggesting that sott become a dating site.

Well, yes you did, unless I misunderstood. You said you went to dating sites and were not satisfied with people you found there, so you came here instead to address that issue (the issue of not finding the kind of people you want to date on dating sites).

My intent and main concern is to create connections with people who "get it" rather than wasting my time on the "blue pill" people.

Seems like a very poor attempt to pretend that you didn't come here to look for "relationships". Everything else you've written, including the very topic of this thread, says you didn't just come here to "talk" and learn with a network.

If romance comes out of it, so be it.

And that little qualification at the end of a very poor attempt at "changing the story" once again gives away what you really want.

I'm completely prepared to make the rest of this journey solo but see nothing wrong with like-minded companionship, romantic or otherwise.

Seems like you're not so "completely prepared" since this is your main focus right now. But there's plenty of "like-minded companionship" in the world - find any 2 people with the same mechanical obsessions and illusions who also happen to be living together and feeding off of each other, and there's your "like-minded companionship". I would highly recommend, if you have not done so already, to read the Wave and the Adventure series on this forum's other website cassiopaea.org. The concepts of love and relationships and romance are explored there, among other things. Most of what we think about love and relationships are nothing but illusions and self-calming rationalizations.

 

[Darquestarr]

Hmmm...thanks, again, for your responses. Whoa! I guess I've been ripped a new one several times over, eh?

So, is the implication that Laura and Ark are the only two people "qualified" to have a relationship in this outfit? And, everyone else are friendless, companionless, self-contained, ever-viligant, solitary units? Perhaps there's an secret pecking order based on how many friends and family have kicked you to the curb because you can see what they don't or won't? That's pretty hardcore, something to aspire to, indeed. Obviously, I'm not there, yet. Perhaps someday, very soon.

 

[anart]

Hmmm...thanks, again, for your responses. Whoa! I guess I've been ripped a new one several times over, eh?

Not at all - though coming here looking for something very specific for yourself and not getting it might feel that way.

So, is the implication that Laura and Ark are the only two people "qualified" to have a relationship in this outfit?

No, but that's quite the sharp little passive-aggressive attack on your part. How generous of you.

And, everyone else are friendless, companionless, self-contained, ever-viligant, solitary units?

Again, thanks for the compliment but not only are you engaged in 'black and white' thinking, but your self-pity is showing.

Perhaps there's an secret pecking order based on how many friends and family have kicked you to the curb because you can see what they don't or won't?

This comment is just bizarre - not really sure what you're getting at with this one.

That's pretty hardcore, something to aspire to, indeed. Obviously, I'm not there, yet. Perhaps someday, very soon.

Look, clearly you are looking for a girlfriend. You thought that since you've not found one to your liking through internet dating sites, that you'd come here and advertise yourself in hopes of 'hooking some food'. You are looking to serve yourself - period.
Turns out that you've advertised yourself quite well, though, so at least there is that.

 

[Ryan]

Hmmm...thanks, again, for your responses. Whoa! I guess I've been ripped a new one several times over, eh?

Oh please... why not just drop the histrionics?

So, is the implication that Laura and Ark are the only two people "qualified" to have a relationship in this outfit?

Umm.. what "outfit" are you referring to? This is a public forum. To the best of my knowledge, I can recall some talking about their spouses and partners, while others (such as yourself) have mentioned they are single. So I don't know where you get the idea from that Laura and Ark are the only ones here in a relationship.

And, everyone else are friendless, companionless, self-contained, ever-viligant, solitary units? Perhaps there's an secret pecking order based on how many friends and family have kicked you to the curb because you can see what they don't or won't?

The only reason I can see for such bizarre and hysterical-sounding statements is that you are projecting inner attributes onto us.... "friendless", "companionless", "solitary" etc. If you are really lonely and scared, why not just say so? Why all the sarcasm and dramatics?

That's pretty hardcore, something to aspire to, indeed. Obviously, I'm not there, yet. Perhaps someday, very soon.

It seems you're more interested in having a relationship than learning about the many subjects discussed here, so why not get back together with your ex? Just eat a bit of humble pie and apologise for arguing with her about her beliefs, and who knows? Maybe she'll take you back? After all, Love is more important than Knowledge, right?

 

[Darquestarr]

It's very easy to make assumptions about someone you know nothing about based on the few keystrokes of info posted. So far, I'm a hysterical, desperate, passive-aggressive, self-pitying, predator looking to feed. Oh yes, and I'm also obviously in search of a girlfriend.

I value love over knowledge? If that were the case I'd be desperately pretending everything is fine, like my ex. And I would probably have only a passing knowledge of this site/forum. It seems, to me, knowledge has lost me so-called love. But I'd rather know than not know, whatever the cost.

With the exception of Ruth and, to an extent, Bernhard, I could make the assumption that the rest of you are of that particular strata of knee-jerk reactionary, self-important, hipper-than-thou, orthodoxy that seem to inhabit every forum on the internet just waiting to skewer anyone (especially a newbie) that says or asks the "wrong" thing. But I won't because I don't know any of you. For all I know you're the coolest people in the world.

To my original question, a simple no would have been enough. I wish you all the best.

I'm out.

 

[Z...]

It's very easy to make assumptions about someone you know nothing about based on the few keystrokes of info posted. So far, I'm a hysterical, desperate, passive-aggressive, self-pitying, predator looking to feed. Oh yes, and I'm also obviously in search of a girlfriend.

Don't take it so personal, we all are like that, by default, just reactive machines under the influence of predator's mind. That's why we need Work to try and turn ourselves into something meaningful.

I value love over knowledge? If that were the case I'd be desperately pretending everything is fine, like my ex. And I would probably have only a passing knowledge of this site/forum. It seems, to me, knowledge has lost me so-called love. But I'd rather know than not know, whatever the cost.

Wow, and you are calling this crowd self important?! What makes you think that just because you can see that not everything is fine you are in better position then those who cant see this?
Instead of letting your predator rage why not use this shock constructively. For starters why not read the last chapter of Wave that is available online, it may help to put things regarding love and knowledge into perspective.

With the exception of Ruth and, to an extent, Bernhard, I could make the assumption that the rest of you are of that particular strata of knee-jerk reactionary, self-important, hipper-than-thou, orthodoxy that seem to inhabit every forum on the internet just waiting to skewer anyone (especially a newbie) that says or asks the "wrong" thing. But I won't because I don't know any of you. For all I know you're the coolest people in the world.

To my original question, a simple no would have been enough. I wish you all the best.

I'm out.

I can only offer you my experience. Few years ago I busted on this forum in the same manner as you except that I was ranting about sungazing. And I got the same reaction, and I behaved like you are doing now. Actually here you projected mostly qualities YOU exhibited so far.
If you wanna listen I'd advise to try and see these "knee-jerk reactionary" forumites as your only true friends for they are providing you with much needed shocks.
What you just got in this thread is called a mirror. Mirrors are scary and can be painful but no Work is possible if you don't have proper mirrors.
And as it is said in the introduction of this forum, if you want to work on yourself you need to set aside all your sacred cows.
It turns out that the biggest sacred cow for many people has very little to do with religious beliefs and much more with their illusion about romantic love and another person which will make them complete.

Now if you are still here you have some serious reading to do, that is if you are interested to stay awake.

 

[Ryan]

It's very easy to make assumptions about someone you know nothing about based on the few keystrokes of info posted.

Actually, it's all I can do, given that I don't know you.

So far, I'm a hysterical, desperate, passive-aggressive, self-pitying, predator looking to feed. Oh yes, and I'm also obviously in search of a girlfriend.

Based on what you posted, it certainly seems like it. And your aggression isn't doing anything to refute that.

I value love over knowledge? If that were the case I'd be desperately pretending everything is fine, like my ex. And I would probably have only a passing knowledge of this site/forum. It seems, to me, knowledge has lost me so-called love. But I'd rather know than not know, whatever the cost.

Ok, fair enough. Why leave so quickly then?

I could make the assumption that the rest of you are of that particular strata of knee-jerk reactionary, self-important, hipper-than-thou, orthodoxy that seem to inhabit every forum on the internet just waiting to skewer anyone (especially a newbie) that says or asks the "wrong" thing. But I won't because I don't know any of you. For all I know you're the coolest people in the world.

I could make the assumption that you are one of that particular strata of knee-jerk, reactionary, self-important, hipper-than-thou trolls that seem to plague every forum on the internet, just waiting to flame any forum regular who doesn't treat you like some kind of unrecognized genius-in-waiting. And based only on what you've posted so far, do you think it would be fair of me to make that assumption?

 

[Ryan]

And as it is said in the introduction of this forum, if you want to work on yourself you need to set aside all your sacred cows.
It turns out that the biggest sacred cow for many people has very little to do with religious beliefs and much more with their illusion about romantic love and another person which will make them complete.

That is actually a really important point, osit. I just recently finished reading a book called, "The Psychology of Romantic Love" by a Jungian psychotherapist named Robert A. Johnson. I highly recommend everyone read it. After I finished it, I was left with the distinct impression that the concept of "romance" as is currently propagated by Western society and its mainstream media is actually one of the most insidious lies of all - a complete "inversion" of what any kind of true Love should be. As a result of this myth, we have generations of people desperately projecting their own higher, nobler qualities onto any available partner in an attempt to "make their soul into flesh and thus possess it", so to speak. It completely negates the higher qualities or personality of the other person and effectively makes them into a kind of "blank mirror" intended for gazing lovingly upon oneself, narcissus-style. And woe to that person if they should attempt to disturb the mirror's reflective shine by rejecting those projected attributes!

Johnson makes a compelling case for why this whole concept of romance is a huge distortion that will inevitably fail, because once the illusion of perfection in the partner is shattered then the "thrill is gone" from the relationship, and projection will likely begin anew with another candidate. If bonds of commitment and matrimony have already been formed during the "romance" stage, this can lead to adultery and divorce, or just general suffering as both people try to stick it out in a relationship that suddenly seems completely incompatible (for the sake of children, for example).

Johnson's solution to the problem of romantic obsession is simply to consciously withdraw projecting one's anima and give it a place in one's inner life, which leads to a feeling of being complete as one already is. The price that is paid is that people might not seem as "thrilling" or "beautiful" or "mysterious" or "sexy" as they did before, but the reward is in being able to see them more closely to what they actually are - which can be the basis of real affection and long-term commitment on a solid foundation.

Easier said than done, I'm sure, but it makes sense to me.

 

[PepperFritz]

I'd rather know than not know, whatever the cost.

Clearly, that is not the case at present. You are choosing to leave this forum (where you are being offered the knowledge you seek) rather than give up your cherished beliefs about relationships and romantic "love".

It seems, to me, knowledge has lost me so-called love.

Yes, knowledge does open our eyes to our own illusionary beliefs, and that can be extremely painful. It sounds to me as though you are on the cusp of "waking up" in this area, but still rather desperately clinging to the hope that you can actually have it both ways: To both "wake up" to objective reality, and at the same time hang on to a few pet illusions. When one reacts to knowledge with the degree of anger that you have, it signals that there is a great deal of deep-rooted investment at stake. You are ANGRY that knowledge has exposed your illusions for what they are, and you are projecting that anger onto us, rather than face up to how deeply invested you are in those illusions.

We have all been where you are now, and can only feel empathy for your pain. The people who have responded to you in this thread are not "attacking" you, they are simply trying to help you make the leap that you KNOW you eventually must if you are continue on your quest for self-knowledge.

I hope you make the decision to return and explore these issues further within the context of this kind of a network. You will be welcomed. But you won't be coddled.