Brain Changes, Wave Changes, Timeline Merge Changes

DreamGod

Jedi
Since I have memory, I remember my life divided in big segments of years like if some of them are from a different version of me and some others are from me (the one who is writing). I been having this feeling that I may have two personalities and they are not to different but still different to notice. I started to notice when I have 11 or 12 years when I started to remember things that actually happened but its like they where experiences from a dream, not from me, like I remember but just felt emotionally disconnected from those moments (Memories from when I was child). The process was difficult all with puberty and ended after months or years maybe and didnt realize all this depressive feelings, melancoly and reflexive thoughts where connected with any change.

I stayed "the same" till I was 25 years old, then it started all over again to feel different and then all this feelings and melancoly and reflexive, its like all my chemicals in my brain where changing or someone was downloading a different version of me to my brain, but when all was over I felt completly disconnected from the period of time since I was 13 till I was 25. It was like if I was a new person again with all the memories but emotionally disconnected from that certain period of time from my life, then again, all those memories from that period of time where more like a dream from someone else. At that time I started to notice and thinking I might have two or more personalities or something else might be happening.

This period of time lasted till two weeks ago, I am 38 years old now. I started to feel all the same process again, feelings of melancoly, depressive some times but not bad thoughts, very reflexive thoughts about life and much more. The thing it was different this time was I felt this really strong connection of feelings and thoughts wich I stopped to have when I was 25. It feels like the version of me from when I was 25 just downloaded in my mind 2 weeks ago and all this process of feelings is the realization that all that now I remember as my thoughts, happened 13 year ago (its like wake up from a coma and start thinking about your old life and feeling sad because just passed 13 years and you need to start over again, but now so easy because you actually marry and have 2 childrens) and all the things that happened in all 13 years felt like a dream now. Besides that, other thing different from before is that I felt like a lot of information downloaded to my brain or just simply unlocked, I just had this moments of clarity I never had with all this difficult existensial questions just answered and I could understand and comprehend everything, then it just went all cloudy, worst than before.

I know, it sounds like I am crazy and i am not talking about this with nobody because it sound like crazy. Maybe it just the normal phases in all people life but I want to ask if someone has the same problem happening. I know personal questions are not cool, but If someone else feel the same way, maybe we could make a question in how the brain behaves with the transition of the wave or if the timeline marges may cause some of this synthoms, maybe I am just crazy.

Thanks for anyone who read this.
 

Approaching Infinity

Administrator
Administrator
Moderator
FOTCM Member
I know, it sounds like I am crazy and i am not talking about this with nobody because it sound like crazy. Maybe it just the normal phases in all people life but I want to ask if someone has the same problem happening. I know personal questions are not cool, but If someone else feel the same way, maybe we could make a question in how the brain behaves with the transition of the wave or if the timeline marges may cause some of this synthoms, maybe I am just crazy.
No problem asking, DreamGod. From what you describe, it sounds like a form of dissociation - i.e., you dissociate from the emotions of a period of your life. Did you go through any big changes in your life when these 'switches' happened? Or did they just come out of nowhere?
 
This is an example and only that. It's just to think a little.

Suppose you are a boy who is entering adulthood and you are a naturally very spiritual person. You are different and your "interests" are not normal for the boys of your age.

Now, you are about to enter the "world". A job, maybe a wife, eventually children. Then, "you" in some "level", you decide that you want to understand. You want to know why that person hates that other person, why that other person is envious of that one, why ..., why ...

Your spiritual ways are an obstacle to "immerse yourself" in life, so you "change" and experience life.

The years pass ... and the experiences pile up. Eventually, you have "wrong" many times, but now you understand. Now, all the people around you are an open book, because to some degree, you have been one of them.

Maybe ..., maybe now that you've learned what you "needed", it's time for that innocent and joyful "spiritual" boy to come back.

I am not talking about you, nor about me, but maybe that is a path that some people choose.🤔
 

DreamGod

Jedi
No problem asking, DreamGod. From what you describe, it sounds like a form of dissociation - i.e., you dissociate from the emotions of a period of your life. Did you go through any big changes in your life when these 'switches' happened? Or did they just come out of nowhere?

I was thinking about that and try to rememmber something relevant, but in fact, the time when I was 25 and happened, I used to be very disciplined; mentally, physically and spiritually (Read a lot, study a lot, work a lot, a lot of physic excersise, in conection with my inner self, etc). So I dont recall some trigger.
 

DreamGod

Jedi
Now, you are about to enter the "world". A job, maybe a wife, eventually children. Then, "you" in some "level", you decide that you want to understand. You want to know why that person hates that other person, why that other person is envious of that one, why ..., why ...

Your spiritual ways are an obstacle to "immerse yourself" in life, so you "change" and experience life.
Thank you for your answer, in fact this is true, didnt saw it that way.

Maybe ..., maybe now that you've learned what you "needed", it's time for that innocent and joyful "spiritual" boy to come back.
About this, may be at some level myself unconsciously choose to do things without the spiritual obstacle (as you pointed) for a period of time and now for some reason my self unconsciously choose to resume where i was before, but I am sure i dont want to go church again :lol:.

I found about C's in 2010 and changed my view of all things for the rest of my life. If I have to review about what were the most significant things in my life that had a deep impact in my thinking (consciously), I most say:

1.- An accident in my left eye (loss of 60% vision) - 1991 (11yo)
2.- My first love - 1997 (17yo)
3.- Found the C´s when I was looking for answer for the meaning of life itself ;-) - 2010 (30yo)
4.- My first son - 2011 (31yo)
5.- Iodine Protocol - 2016 (36yo)
6.- My second son - 2017 (37yo)

This were the most significant things in my life so far and maybe one of this was responsable for what I think is happening to me.

Have a great day! :cool:
 

duyunne

Jedi Council Member
Hi Dreamgod

I know the feeling of having split lives in one. Although it’s a result of my dreams and not my waking memory.

I’ve had an odd dream as a teen where I accidentally killed my little brother and went to jail. It felt real like it happened. It’s an odd thing to carry around, like a mental disorder.

Fast forward to now, any time I remember the dream, I’m convinced that it wasn’t my brother after all, and that the child I accidentally killed as my son.

In the dream, this child was playing with a knife and I got very mad that they were being unsafe and some how managed to cut the child’s neck, causing this poor child to bleed to death in my arms as I cried out in grief stricken agony. Then the court proceedings, the publicity, the shrinkage of my life to a small tiled room. It was horrific.

At 17 I attributed this to my brother as he was the only person the child resembled. Now, I think it was an alternative future premonition of me and my son. But it could my memory playing tricks.

Either way, I’m 200% more cautious about leaving knives on the counter and believed the experience or lesson was taught to me as a nightmare instead of a waking experience.

I’m gracious as result and treasure both my son and my brother even more than I could have otherwise.

My brother is in his 20s now and my son is almost 10. So I’ve surpassed the event being a possibility in my life.

it was a heavy burden to carry this around. Also something very difficult to talk about.

I’m glad you shared your experience. Thank you.
 

DreamGod

Jedi
Hi Dreamgod

I know the feeling of having split lives in one. Although it’s a result of my dreams and not my waking memory.

I’ve had an odd dream as a teen where I accidentally killed my little brother and went to jail. It felt real like it happened. It’s an odd thing to carry around, like a mental disorder.

Fast forward to now, any time I remember the dream, I’m convinced that it wasn’t my brother after all, and that the child I accidentally killed as my son.

In the dream, this child was playing with a knife and I got very mad that they were being unsafe and some how managed to cut the child’s neck, causing this poor child to bleed to death in my arms as I cried out in grief stricken agony. Then the court proceedings, the publicity, the shrinkage of my life to a small tiled room. It was horrific.

At 17 I attributed this to my brother as he was the only person the child resembled. Now, I think it was an alternative future premonition of me and my son. But it could my memory playing tricks.

Either way, I’m 200% more cautious about leaving knives on the counter and believed the experience or lesson was taught to me as a nightmare instead of a waking experience.

I’m gracious as result and treasure both my son and my brother even more than I could have otherwise.

My brother is in his 20s now and my son is almost 10. So I’ve surpassed the event being a possibility in my life.

it was a heavy burden to carry this around. Also something very difficult to talk about.

I’m glad you shared your experience. Thank you.
Hi duyunne

Thank you for share your experience, I feel really weird about what I am going to tell you, I had a dream years ago (2012), about accidentaly killing my son in the very same way, cuting troath with a knife, i posted it here, take a look. In my case it really ended in I saving my son.

I was hoping to post about a dream I had last night, but had a lot of work and didnt make time.

I had a terrible dream where I, for no apparently reason, was cutting the throat of a co-worker, I said to him: "Im sorry name" and I took him from behind and cut his throat with a knife. Then, for no reason this guy turn into my little 11 month boy and I was in shock, screaming and crying because I cut my babys throat and he was still alive and moving and choking with his blood. It was horrible and then I wake up with tears in my eyes and very scare.

I was hoping to ask about what it could mean, I never had those kind of dreams where I kill people and much less my own son, and then today I was eating with my wife and son and he started to choke with his food, he often do this with a cough and then keep eating, but this time he was choking for real, my wife didnt believe the baby was choking and she tried to give him water but I knew this wasnt good, hi started to turn red and I took him and press his belly with enogh force to make him threw, he did well, it was a piece of apple and all went fine again.

I dont want to sound like I had a vision or a premonition, but I did want to believe that my dream had to do something with this, that for some reason my subconsience knew something I didnt. I can tell you it was the worst dream and the worst scare of my life.
 

DreamGod

Jedi
I just told my wife about this and she scared a little, she doesnt understand many things but is very supportive which is nice ;-). I felt ashamed telling all this, lets see how things move forward.

Thank you very much for your answers and time.
 

duyunne

Jedi Council Member
I just told my wife about this and she scared a little, she doesnt understand many things but is very supportive which is nice ;-). I felt ashamed telling all this, lets see how things move forward.

Thank you very much for your answers and time.
No problem, I told my wife too a few years ago. Since then we agreed to leave our knife stand in the cupboard.
It’s a nice stand, kind of sad to lose it to a dream!

But I sleep easier at night, so it’s worth it.
 
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