My Abduction Experience

[Caecus]

Well, I gather that when you say ‘I wish it was a dream’, it's as if you're saying ‘this wasn't a dream’ and that's because you're protecting yourself from what really happened and you genuinely don't know, you obviously don't have the full picture. Just from that brief line you write I can guess that it makes you anticipate possibilities that haven't allowed you to resolve it properly. And if it was a bad dream, maybe something happened to you that wasn't necessarily an abduction, was it? And if it was...and if...
I know it may sound contradictory, however I suggest you read up on anticipation and expectation and try to get into balance to strengthen yourself (stalking) and seek answers as outside help, but first I suggest you do more action-work on yourself.
Have faith in the universe and I hope with all my heart that everything works out as it should.

Again, I would like to thank you for your comments and for challenging my perspective. I'll admit I was initially confused by your response (moreso how it was framed) but I'm thankful you challenged my position, instigating me to re-evaluate my perspective...

I found the following quote that resonated with the concept (for me):

"Obsession with specific results is not
knowledge, for it imposes one’s subjectivity on the world and thus does not protect, but rather
blinds one to reality and leaves one open to dangers. Thus flexibility and objective perception are
key."

Initially, I did not understand how this could apply to ME, as my opinion of myself was that I was being Objective/Open in regard to the providence of the matter, but now I can see by my choice of words that this was not entirely the case. I would still like to think I'm open to interpretation of the event either way, but I now realize it may not be so simple as I think, and I had better re-evaluate my feelings, thoughts, & words more carefully....'Stalking"

Thank You @Liliea !

 

[Mari]

I understand that such events can make people "obsessed" about it and makes you wonder why it happened, and makes you feel violated, weather the event actually happened or was it a bad dream.
At this point, I think, it really doesn´t matter.

What matters is, IMO, that whatever was meddling with your head managed to make you think and rethink about that for 30 years, draining your energy and creating thought loops.
Would you say that 30 years of draining is finally enough?

Why not stop with it now, let it go and use it to work on yourself - to not be "eatable" anymore, so to say.
Watch your thoughts, your diet, do EE, read, learn and gather knowledge.
And you are in a right place now, where you will get help with any of above when you ask. Onwards and upwards!

 

[Caecus]

I understand that such events can make people "obsessed" about it and makes you wonder why it happened, and makes you feel violated, weather the event actually happened or was it a bad dream.
At this point, I think, it really doesn´t matter.

What matters is, IMO, that whatever was meddling with your head managed to make you think and rethink about that for 30 years, draining your energy and creating thought loops.
Would you say that 30 years of draining is finally enough?

Why not stop with it now, let it go and use it to work on yourself - to not be "eatable" anymore, so to say.
Watch your thoughts, your diet, do EE, read, learn and gather knowledge.
And you are in a right place now, where you will get help with any of above when you ask. Onwards and upwards!

 

[aragorn]

Sorry to hear that you had such a horrible experience, Caecus! It can be very frustrating to not know what really happened, if it was real or just a dream. And it's difficult to know if 'digging deep' to get to the truth and reliving the event by using hypnotherapy or something similar is always worth it. At least, if you ask me, I sometimes find it hard to decide if I should 'go for it' or not (I have events from my childhood that could be dug up).

Sometimes, as others have alluded to, the best course of action is to work on yourself to evolve into a as balanced and healthy person you can be (the information on this forum is of great help), and then, these awful memories can maybe get resolved or their grip weakened to a point that they no longer bother or scare you.

 

[Caecus]

Sorry to hear that you had such a horrible experience, Caecus! It can be very frustrating to not know what really happened, if it was real or just a dream. And it's difficult to know if 'digging deep' to get to the truth and reliving the event by using hypnotherapy or something similar is always worth it. At least, if you ask me, I sometimes find it hard to decide if I should 'go for it' or not (I have events from my childhood that could be dug up).

Sometimes, as others have alluded to, the best course of action is to work on yourself to evolve into a as balanced and healthy person you can be (the information on this forum is of great help), and then, these awful memories can maybe get resolved or their grip weakened to a point that they no longer bother or scare you.

Thanks for your kind words Aragorn... Yes, it can be frustrating not knowing, and not knowing how to interact with these thoughts of the unknown.
I think my confusion is how to or if I should integrate this experience with "working on myself, balancing, etc."... approach or avoid? or maybe there's another option I'm not considering? I feel as though I've avoided it most of my life, at least in the sense of "what can I even do about this? nothing I guess... ok then... BUT there it remains - unaffected, for now at least.

Gosh... I must say; in my short time landing in here, I am surprised at how humbling this is.
I like to think I'm fairly adequate at communicating socially, although I'm actually pretty shy...
BUT, attempting to parse out my thoughts in a coherent manner around this matter has proven exceedingly & surprisingly difficult!
Not only that, but EYE OPENING as to how little I know my self/thoughts, and that I have some work to do from an angle I didn't expect.

Sorry if my thread turned into a public therapy session, but I'm very thankful to have landed here & for the considerations offered by all.

 

[Voyageur]

Not only that, but EYE OPENING as to how little I know my self/thoughts, and that I have some work to do from an angle I didn't expect.

Sorry if my thread turned into a public therapy session, but I'm very thankful to have landed here & for the considerations offered by all.

These memories that linger can be tough to filter, and you are not alone by any means. That said, though, memories and the emotions that accompany can compound (you said you were 10 or 11-years of age) over ones lifetime (childhood especially sees vulnerability). So If not compounding, these memories may simply come up from time to time like a skip on a vinyl record - again and again they may seem to cycle, or in some case one may be in anticipation of them without being able to truly understand (observations or memories) in order to ease ones load around them.

As aragorn had alluded to above, given time while working on oneself, along with feedback that one can ask for and received, it is indeed surprising what can later be seen and what things connect. Even reading from others experiences and on how they once viewed some disquieting matter, and then later thought about them with new eyes, it can be remarkable. In these regards, Laura's many books takes one on this journey, as you may have already read or not, along with countless other authors.

Nothing said above discounts what you experienced, as we seem to very much live in a High Strangeness world (and getting stranger) - be it physical or dreams, yet it is to find some semblance with them, not that you have not done so.

So, thanks for sharing as you did, while also there is no need to be sorry. People here get it.

 

[Joe]

I think my confusion is how to or if I should integrate this experience with "working on myself, balancing, etc."... approach or avoid?

My advice would be to put it on the shelf, and if you're so inclined, read up on the topic, and maybe you'll gain some insights that will cast more light on the event.

 

[Ricardo]

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