My Father's Wake

Gary

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
As Edgar Cayce remarked: a dead Presbyterian is just that: a dead Presbyterian! What this statement means to me is: when a person dies, they invariably carry their strongest beliefs with them. Laura has mentioned in the recent Knowledge and Being videos, 'religion' - and the fear associated with it seems to be the prime reason why so many folk choose to stay 'earthbound', rather than continuing the natural journey to the Light (contemplation plane /5D).

My Dad died just over 25 years ago, after being diagnosed with cancer a few years before. We followed the advice of the 'specialist' doctors - blindly believing that they knew what was best for Dad, none of us thinking there may be alternative methods of healing. All is lessons :) Anyway, my brother and I returned to Ireland, to join my Mum and an Auntie at his hospital bedside, which was a very poignant, emotional experience and we held his hands and prayed as he passed over.

Being an Irish Roman Catholic, it is traditional to have a wake - whereby the body of the deceased is laid out in an open coffin, normally at the family home, so folk can come and pay their respects (or just drink your whiskey!). Shortly after lighting three tall candles in the room where my Dad was, a young cousin of mine came rushing into the kitchen, exclaiming there was something strange about a candle. Anyone with an understanding of Roman Catholicism, could clearly see the resemblance with the candle and the iconic image of Our Lady at Lourdes (see below) - which was interpreted by all present as a "wonderful sign" that Dad was at peace in heaven.

It was only a few years ago, after addressing some outstanding issues I had with my brother concerning Dad, that he confided that some time after the funeral "all the doors were banging". He was at the family home with his girlfriend (now wife) and despite being very scared said "Dad, please stop - you are scaring us!". And it stopped. I don't know if Dad is still 'earthbound' or what reasons he had for staying. He was a good, honourable man who always provided a happy, secure home for his beloved family - it was 'out of character' to scare his family like that. But then, religion - him being a devout Roman Catholic - does, from my understanding, place a heavy emphasis on fear, sin and guilt. Most folk simply don't know how to think -let alone how to live or die. Consequently, with so many ignorant, frightened souls hanging around, sometimes attaching themselves to folk here - it seems like a 'negative feedback loop' of sorts from beyond the grave, potentially making it even more difficult to find our 'authentic Self'.

Once I have read more on the subject of 'Spirit Release' I intend to help my Dad find his way to the Light, if still 'earthbound' wandering. I am still seeking the appropriate words for prayers in this respect. However, if my Dad has attached himself to someone, I will ask for assistance when I contact someone with the necessary expertise and experience. I have heard many folk explain how comforting it is to 'feel the presence' of their loved ones, which may mean they are still 'earthbound', but perhaps that is not always the case? Maybe learning more about 'spirit attachments' and 'earthbound spirits' helps to prepare us to the concept of 'transition' (4D/5D) and relates in a way to 'alternative selves' as the 'Wave' approaches.

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Gary

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
Hi Gawan. Yes I am intending to contact Patrick once I have read more on the subject. I have read his Soul Rescue Manual, and nearly completed Hostage to the Devil, and have just started reading The Unquiet Dead by Dr Edith Fiore. The experiences of other Forum members has been very interesting and beneficial too! Although I 'feel' my Dad's spirit is at peace, my main interest is seeking how best (protecting myself and honouring free will of others) to release wandering earthbound spirits, if/when that is appropriate. I am not currently skilled or knowledgable enough to use a Spirit Board for diagnostic purposes, nor do I have the gift of mediumship, so releasing attached spirits is best left to experts such as Patrick /Heather, Laura etc I think. I still have alot to learn, but I feel that a form of prayer (such as the PoTS) offered sincerely - created for spirit release purposes - could be of benefit to earthbound spirits themselves, and their otherwise potential (and actual) physical human hosts. :)
 

jess

Jedi Master
Hi Gary thanks for sharing, my post is somewhat related, although not in regards to paranormal physical phenomena.
if anyone has the opportunity to comment on this I would greatly appreciate it, I have a question.
My father died 3 years ago, I don't know how to pray for his soul, I grew up in the catholic formation, but I really don't know what to do, if there is anything I can do for him like lighting candles or praying.

He was an honest and responsible person, although he mostly was sour and unloving and with a tendency to drink a little at social events, he was diagnosed with Lewy Body Dementia. I was living at home with my parents when my father began to have problems walking and had very advanced dementia in 2015, but when I moved to the USA I stopped seeing him and only had contact with him by phone. He died when my daughter was born and I did not have a permission to leave the USA.

Several days ago I had a dream that my father was sitting next to me and he was hugging me and I was hugging him and telling him that I loved him very much. And then he asked me if I wanted to go with him. I didn't say anything to him, I just hugged him and I was very impressed by how realistic that moment was, I really felt that he was with me.
 

Palinurus

The Living Force
This question is difficult to answer in general terms as praying is a personal affair, different for different people. Having said that, I think anything sincere from the heart to the heart will suffice to make contact in some form or another. Therefore, if your intentions are genuine the way in which you pray (form or format) seems of minor importance. You just have to have faith in the process for it to succeed, I think.

I did a search to find out what is on offer on this subject and got the following. Please note, none of it gives you direct answers to your question but all are helpful in approaching it from several, diverse angles. The rest is up to you, I'm afraid. :hug2:

How to pray for the souls of the dead
On Death
Descriptions of the "afterlife"
Is the bright white light and tunnel an alien trap for discarnate spirits?

Density
Prayer
Prayer of the Soul

I really hope this will provide you with the necessary building blocks for solving your problem. Take care! :flowers:
 

msante

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
I mean, I also don't know exactly how to formulate the question.

Please, if anyone knows how to pray, or what prayers can be said for our dead relatives.

Hi Jess, I agree with Palinurus, I don't think there is a formula or a recipe for this type of situation. I also don't think it's wise to jump to conclusions, your father may have died perhaps with some guilt for not being more loving (or other things), but that doesn't necessarily mean he was earthbound, it's possible he had a transition to 5D and is in a contemplation phase. I think we all die (and will eventually die again) with unresolved issues, unfinished missions and even frustrations about what we set out to accomplish in this life, but that doesn't mean that once we leave our bodies we can't make the transition to 5D, although I suppose in some cases it will be easier and more natural and in others not so much.

Regarding your question (and in my personal opinion, of course) I wouldn't think of rituals with candles or some kind of written or pre-determined prayer. IMHO, if your feelings for your dad are good, compassionate and you have a good memory of him, perhaps what might help him is that you simply tell him in your thoughts that despite his faults and failings you loved him, and that whatever mistakes he may have made you don't hold any grudges or consider him indebted to you. Wherever he is, I think this can help him to relieve the weight of his "backpack", to heal and maybe even plan a next life with serenity and some peace in his "heart".

I hope I have been of some help, take care :flowers:!
 

jess

Jedi Master
This question is difficult to answer in general terms as praying is a personal affair, different for different people. Having said that, I think anything sincere from the heart to the heart will suffice to make contact in some form or another. Therefore, if your intentions are genuine the way in which you pray (form or format) seems of minor importance. You just have to have faith in the process for it to succeed, I think.

I did a search to find out what is on offer on this subject and got the following. Please note, none of it gives you direct answers to your question but all are helpful in approaching it from several, diverse angles. The rest is up to you, I'm afraid. :hug2:

How to pray for the souls of the dead
On Death
Descriptions of the "afterlife"
Is the bright white light and tunnel an alien trap for discarnate spirits?

Density
Prayer
Prayer of the Soul

I really hope this will provide you with the necessary building blocks for solving your problem. Take care! :flowers:
Thank you very much Palinurus, it is a very good context of information that you recommend me, I will review it, thanks again for the time to look for it, I really did not have much idea of how to approach it.
Yes, I have done something like thoughts talking to Heavenly Father or Mother Creator about how I feel and towards being able to help my father or let him know that he has a place in my heart since in his last moments before he died I could not be with him physically. Maybe that was something that was pending between me and my dad.

Thanks for your help 💐
 

jess

Jedi Master
Hi Jess, I agree with Palinurus, I don't think there is a formula or a recipe for this type of situation. I also don't think it's wise to jump to conclusions, your father may have died perhaps with some guilt for not being more loving (or other things), but that doesn't necessarily mean he was earthbound, it's possible he had a transition to 5D and is in a contemplation phase. I think we all die (and will eventually die again) with unresolved issues, unfinished missions and even frustrations about what we set out to accomplish in this life, but that doesn't mean that once we leave our bodies we can't make the transition to 5D, although I suppose in some cases it will be easier and more natural and in others not so much.

Regarding your question (and in my personal opinion, of course) I wouldn't think of rituals with candles or some kind of written or pre-determined prayer. IMHO, if your feelings for your dad are good, compassionate and you have a good memory of him, perhaps what might help him is that you simply tell him in your thoughts that despite his faults and failings you loved him, and that whatever mistakes he may have made you don't hold any grudges or consider him indebted to you. Wherever he is, I think this can help him to relieve the weight of his "backpack", to heal and maybe even plan a next life with serenity and some peace in his "heart".

I hope I have been of some help, take care :flowers:!
Thank you very much msante for your words and the approach to what you say, it is a great help to know from the experiences or comments of others, since the information is there, but without a structure of how to approach it, I could be a little lost of how to start.
Yes, the rituals was what I wanted to avoid, because that is the only thing I knew as a background, it is just that I had already had several dreams with my father and I did not know what to think, I just thought of praying for him.

Thank you very much for your help too 🙂🌻
 

msante

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
Thank you very much Palinurus, it is a very good context of information that you recommend me, I will review it, thanks again for the time to look for it, I really did not have much idea of how to approach it.
Yes, I have done something like thoughts talking to Heavenly Father or Mother Creator about how I feel and towards being able to help my father or let him know that he has a place in my heart since in his last moments before he died I could not be with him physically. Maybe that was something that was pending between me and my dad.

Thanks for your help 💐

Reading your last posts I was thinking that maybe something else you could do is forgive yourself for not being there for your dad in his last moments. I think that maybe in part you are the one who needs to let him go by releasing yourself from the guilt of not being there for him and saying goodbye in a better way. I hope this makes some sense to you.
 

Palinurus

The Living Force
I hope this makes some sense to you.
It certainly does make sense to me.

When my father died ten years ago, I couldn't personally attend his last moments either but luckily I was able to say thanks, farewell, goodbye and safe journey - both in writing and on the phone - as his death wasn't entirely unexpected or sudden. He just died of old age (almost 93) and he himself said he had had enough and that it was time for him to leave.

From this background I can imagine what it must have been like for someone who didn't have those opportunities like I had, and it spurred me on to make a post in answer that could make a difference, however small it might be. FWIW.
 

PERLOU

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
Pour ma petite Maman qui nous a quittés le 7 mars 2015 je prie chaque Matin et Soir, je lui dit bonjour chaque matin et je lui parle aussi des fois dans la journée quand je vois ou lis quelques choses qui l'auraient amusée... Dans mes prières je dis :
Oh Divin Esprit Cosmique, je remets entre tes mains ma Petite Maman...
J'énumère ensuite tous ceux à qui je pense...

For my little Mom who left us on March 7, 2015 I pray every Morning and Evening, I say good morning to her every morning and I also talk to her sometimes during the day when I see or read some things that would have amused her... In my prayers I say:
Oh Divine Cosmic Spirit, I place my Little Mama in your hands...
I then list all the people I think of...
 

Tuatha de Danaan

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
I don't know how to pray for his soul,
Hi Jess, Your question has brought to the forefront for me a similar question I've had since my father died a few years ago. Having been brought up in the Catholic faith I adhered to the belief that we prayed for the souls of the dead.

By varying degrees I've come to the conclusion that once the soul has departed it has completed it's life work ( maybe not as completely as was planned when it incarnated to begin with). If we pray for them, why are we praying for them.? I tend to believe they will have their soul review and proceed from there. We will not be able to affect that.

Instead I feel that we can pray to them, and by praying I mean think of our times together where we laughed or maybe we may have upset them and ask for forgiveness. Praying to them as we would our ancestors in effect. I feel that my being a very imperfect and faulty person that it would border on arrogance to think I could pray for the soul of one departed. I would hasten to add that this is my personal opinion and view. As regards praying for the souls of those who we suspect may be earthbound is tangling with something we know nothing about.
 

jess

Jedi Master
Reading your last posts I was thinking that maybe something else you could do is forgive yourself for not being there for your dad in his last moments. I think that maybe in part you are the one who needs to let him go by releasing yourself from the guilt of not being there for him and saying goodbye in a better way. I hope this makes some sense to you.
Yes, if it makes sense, I will see how to meditate about it, I think I didn't process it well when it happened because of the physical distance, I hope my encounter with my father in the dream and look for the way to heal myself, realizing things that I really didn't see before, thank you very much for helping.
 

jess

Jedi Master
Hi Jess, Your question has brought to the forefront for me a similar question I've had since my father died a few years ago. Having been brought up in the Catholic faith I adhered to the belief that we prayed for the souls of the dead.

By varying degrees I've come to the conclusion that once the soul has departed it has completed it's life work ( maybe not as completely as was planned when it incarnated to begin with). If we pray for them, why are we praying for them.? I tend to believe they will have their soul review and proceed from there. We will not be able to affect that.

Instead I feel that we can pray to them, and by praying I mean think of our times together where we laughed or maybe we may have upset them and ask for forgiveness. Praying to them as we would our ancestors in effect. I feel that my being a very imperfect and faulty person that it would border on arrogance to think I could pray for the soul of one departed. I would hasten to add that this is my personal opinion and view. As regards praying for the souls of those who we suspect may be earthbound is tangling with something we know nothing about.
Hi Tuatha de Danaan, I feel that I mainly thought of praying because my only knowledge related to.... or "religious" is in a small part within the catholic church and other is reading here in the forum and the book of Laura's "Wave", I feel that it could be more relate to the ignorance, or beliefs and/or "erroneous ideas about the beyond".
I think that despite the errors of thought, or semantics in writing, I had this strong feeling of encountering with my father in a dream and not knowing what to do, if is posible, I was looking for a guide about what to do or what to "pray" as a way of knowing how to deal with it.
Thanks to all of you for your comments, I can started looking for more information about it, I really didn't know before where to start.
 
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