Session 22 February 2010


FOTCM Member
A couple people on the forum noticed that I was up at 3:30 a.m. last night/this morning; the reason is I spent a rather sleepless night agonizing over what I am going to publish here.

As I have already mentioned in a couple of places on the forum, we had a recent session and it was one of the most disturbing sessions with the Cs we've ever had. It was conducted last Monday night and was transcribed by Mr. Scott the next day. At first I thought "well, that should never see the light of day" even though the Cs said, yeah, it needed to be published as a lesson to others. But now, with a number of discussions about relationships going on, I think I had better follow the Cs advice though this one is going to require background information that I am going to try to make as brief as possible.

The main topic of this session is the recent visit for EE Teacher Training of a certain couple and their 15 month old child. Their names have been changed for privacy though.

Now, you may well ask how anybody got me to bend the rules about no small children in this house? Over the years it has been said repeatedly that the Chateau is not a place for young children, there are too many important things happening, everyone is busy, too much breakable equipment and decoration, and baby proofing is virtually impossible. In fact, it was just recently mentioned again to another family when they were hoping to come for the EE training that they needed to leave their young child at home or make arrangements to stay in a B&B and bring a baby-sitter.

The rules were bent by me because the baby is young enough that my daughters could (and wanted to) watch and play with him while the parents were busy. It didn’t turn out that way and it is really too bad that the parents did not let us know in advance just how things were. I was, of course, expecting a toddler; I was not expecting a child that presents as this one did. The rules were bent because I was trying to be externally considerate of the man who, I realized, wanted very much to help his wife to feel a part of the group and she was very suspicious and critical from the start.

But, I’m getting ahead of myself.

The man is a long time member of the forum here, a member of QFS and a SOTT editor/writer. After he had become a member of the forum/groups, he apparently, without networking about it, decided to try an online dating service: E-Harmony, I believe. It was through this service that he met the woman he is now married to. I guess it is understandable that he was looking for a partner with some desperation since he was 43 and not getting younger, and he really wanted a family. Sue already had two nearly grown children (she is the same age as Bob.)

We (me, QFS, etc) did not even know about “Sue” until we were planning a meeting in October of 2007. At that point, “Bob” wanted to attend but told me that his girlfriend would “kill him” if he went to France and did not take her. So, an exception was made that early in the game and, frankly, it was not a good experience for most of us. This woman managed to insult or offend half of the 50 people present in the few days she was here, including three of my children.

During this meeting, it seems, “Bob” proposed to “Sue” and she announced it and received plenty of congratulations. I, of course, had a lot of doubts, but I was willing to give her the benefit of the doubt for Bob’s sake.

So, Bob and Sue got married and somewhere in there went through InVitro Fertilization. Apparently, Bob really wanted a baby of his and Sue wasn’t getting pregnant the normal way. They had a number of failures with the procedure and then, on what was supposed to be the last try, it took. They thereafter referred to the child as their “miracle baby” for this reason. You'll soon see why this is so tragically ironic.

This, of course, was going on in the background without Bob discussing it with anyone. He had the idea that it was a good idea and relied on his own thinking entirely. The results will soon become apparent.

It’s one thing to come to The Work with relationships already in place: then you have to work where you are planted. What struck me as so bizarre is that this is a guy who, above all other people, knew the score about what is in our future and STILL went to this extreme to have a baby. I mean, if it just happens and you are faced with being pregnant, obviously, unless extraordinary conditions prevail, the right thing to do is have the baby and “work with what life has given you.” But to know what Bob knows, for Sue to be unable to get pregnant normally, (being the age she was and possibly other factors), and to spend all that time, money and effort to have a baby just passes my understanding.

But that’s what they did. And, as you will see, it looks like Nature knew better. They are now faced with a reality that is quite different from the one they thought they were creating wearing their rose-colored glasses.

So, that’s the background.

Bob and Sue were scheduled to come here for their EE presentation and feedback. This was the last in a long series of QFS members who are training to teach EE coming here to fulfill the legal requirement for ordination: they have to attend a “seminary” type training. We made it clear that they – the QFS members – would be creating the teaching program, that we would film and critique it, and these videos would be made available to other QFS members to learn from and critique. The object being to CREATE the training program by trial and error.

So, we have had a continuing flow of guests/EE training/videoing going on here since October with about a week between in some cases, but usually only a few days. During Christmas, we had several FOTCM board members here and spent a week in meetings, working out details, documentation, trying to figure out how to do things in a venue that is new to us. By the time that group went home in early January, my brain was fried from all the thinking!

Then, the next group arrived in mid January, and we were off again! In most cases, these visits were a pleasure because our guests, being long-time members of the group, and having visited before, felt at home, pitched in and helped out in every way they could, and in spite of the work-load and the intense discussions in our planning sessions, we had a good time.

The mid-January group was followed very shortly by the UK group at the end of January. This was followed, just a few days later by Kerry Cassidy and her cameraman/friend. We were looking forward to some down time except that one of the UK crew had come down with a head cold his first day here and now, on the 4th/5th of February, about half the house came down with it also. I was actually feeling really rough in the throat the day we videoed the PC interview and the next day, I actually was sick. It was a short, mild, cold for me, but not so for everyone in the house! It also didn't help that several of us were doing Mercury detox so that may have exacerbated the symptoms.

So, our down time was occupied by getting over a cold and Bob and Sue were to arrive on Sunday, the 14th. Since everybody had been sick and struggling to keep up with the business end of things anyway, we were exhausted before they arrived and planned to get their room ready the next day, hoping that someone would feel well enough to do it.

At about 9 or 10 p.m. on the night before their arrival, (about the time they were leaving the U.S.) our electricity went out. This happens a lot and we don't usually sweat it because it's just a question of flipping a switch out on the pole in the yard, and turning off whatever overloaded the circuit. This time, that didn't work. Ark and Mr. Scott, Perceval, Burma Jones and Belibaste, spent about 45 minutes figuring out that this was NOT the normal power outage. It was below freezing outside, late on a Saturday night, guests arriving in the early afternoon of the next day and we weren't even ready. Plus, the guys (except Ark) were still in recovery from the head cold. So, it wasn't a pleasant event.

Somehow, Belibaste managed to get the electric company to send a man out in the middle of the freezing night (he told him that the house was full of old people who would die from the cold! I was ready to get out a cane and hobble around for effect if needed.) and this guy replaced the big breaker switch which was completely burned up. On top of that, one of the computers in the house got fried during the efforts to get the lights back on. (It belonged to my youngest daughter who is starting to learn video editing, so this was a real bummer.)

But, as ya'll know, we generally take such events under observation and wait for more clues before deciding if it is meaningful or not. At this point, it didn't seem to be terribly meaningful.

Next morning, I received an email from Bob, sent from the Paris airport, telling me that - surprise, surprise! - their plane was actually early and they had changed their flight from Paris to Toulouse and would be arriving two hours earlier!

Well, that was good news for them, but for us, those extra couple hours of down-time, rest, being allowed to get things ready at a slower pace, meant a lot! We rushed around, got the baby bed out of storage, put the new mattress on it, covered it with a plastic mattress cover, made it up for baby, made sure there were nice sheets on the bed, plenty of covers, dusted, vacuumed, aired out the room, turned on the heat, and everything was ready.

They arrived. We took their luggage up to their room. We warned them that it would be best to try to stay up for awhile and go to bed at a reasonably normal time so as to re-set their body clocks. It was hard, but we watched videos and chatted and had dinner and so on, until it was about 7:30 or 8, at which point they went up to bed. Somewhere along this time, we learned that our efforts to get a bed ready for the baby was wasted since they “co-sleep.” Well, actually, at home, Sue sleeps with the baby who nurses on and off all night, and Bob sleeps in another room.

On Monday, Sue was up pretty early and down in the kitchen. Bob wasn't feeling too well so he stayed in bed most of the day with the baby. Apparently the baby had come down sick at about the same time and was vomiting upstairs. I was in the kitchen and only got the news when Sue announced that she wanted to go to the market with me. She said that the baby was sick but she wanted to get out and bring him. I said that since he had been vomiting, maybe she should leave him with Bob. She said that Bob was too sick to watch the baby, he would come with us. I really didn’t think that taking a baby that MIGHT be getting seriously sick was a good idea. And based on the evidence that Bob was sick in a similar way, it looked iffy. But Sue insisted, and off we went.

The first thing the baby did in the supermarket was projectile vomit in front of the meat counter. We had another stop to make and Sue sat in the car with the baby who continued to vomit into a plastic bag Sue had acquired at the store.

Bob stayed in bed all day Monday, and baby was with him most of the time. Sue went up occasionally to feed baby and look in on Bob, but mostly she was downstairs. Baby continued to vomit off and on.

On Tuesday, baby and Bob continue to be sick, but by this time, Sue is sending Bob down with baby so she can sleep. So, sick Bob and sick baby spend a lot of time hanging out in the kitchen or the salon or at the computer with baby vomiting a bit now and then.

Tuesday night, I had a very intense dream that woke me up, about a plane crash. Bob was in the dream, but I didn't see Sue in there. It put me in an emotional state for the whole of Wednesday.

On Wednesday, in addition to the after-effects of the bad dream, I got up to find that Perceval had come down sick during the night with the stomach bug and had been vomiting. Then, Athena and Bubbles began to feel ill during the morning. Bubbles announced that she had had a dream about a demon that was connected to babies. This is referred to in the session.

Ailén said:
Before that dream, some of us were sharing our observations about Johnny. We were really worried because he looked somehow retarded. At 15 months old, he doesn't walk, he doesn't say a word, we can't feed himself, he only knows how to bang objects against the table, his attention span is extremely short, he didn't like anybody, etc. He is actually the most unlikable baby I've ever met. And I love babies! No matter what we did, he would have this indifferent look in his face. It was actually spooky and depressing to see. The baby doesn’t like anything except to listen to music on an MP3 player or watch youtube music videos. They hold him all the time.

At one point, Laura said very carefully to Sue and Bob that she had a feeling that something was wrong with Johnny, and that it could have something to do with toxicity. At first, they both reacted a bit and said that they thought he was perfectly normal, but then they started thinking about ways to find out if there was a problem. The weird thing is that Sue didn't get upset by this, and much less when you compare it with the tantrum she threw later about Laura's post to the group. She also said things about her other two kids that were totally cruel. So it's only when it is about her that she gets upset.

Sue was scheduled to do her presentation and we got the cameras and lights set up to do it (which is an ordeal since we don’t have a big enough studio and have to set everything up and take it down when we film these presentations) and about the time we were ready, in the afternoon, Atriedes started getting really sick.

About Sue' presentation: It really was bad. Not her manner or her enthusiasm or any of that, but she simply did not know the material. At all. When it got to the part about belly breathing, it was clear that she didn't even know what that meant. With a little questioning, we figured out that she had not watched the training videos or even the introductory video where Burma Jones had placed the working model of the diaphragm and the vagus nerve. She obviously had not used the video with the routine even once. (Or if she had, she sure hadn't learned anything from it.)

Ailén said:
I concur. She had told us before that she had watched most of the videos except the last ones, but didn't want to watch them all so as not to "copy" from everyone. We told her that this WAS the training, and that we were all learning from each other's presentation, that it was actually necessary to take what was good from each one. Anyway, it was obvious that she really hadn't watched them or learned anything from them. Bob then told us that it was because she's busy all the time with her sons.

So, as we do with everyone, we just stopped right there and worked with her to get the right information in her head, to demonstrate how it was done, practice a bit, and then carry on with the presentation, looking for other trouble spots. All on film for the benefit of others. It's not a bad way to teach something, IMO. You learn what the student knows, where they lack information, and so on, and these experiences become valuable teachings for others who may have similar gaps in their knowledge. Sue was seriously lacking the correct information but that's no big deal. You just impart the information, make the corrections, and do it right.

Bob wanted to cook his fish recipe on Wednesday night, and he did, but I heard that he wasn't well enough to eat it. I had already gone up to bed, being exhausted after working with Sue on her presentation.

Anyway, on Thursday morning, the day Bob was supposed to do his presentation, Sue announced to me that she wanted to do her’s over and she didn't want anybody to see the first one. I told her that it was actually a great teaching video because teaching someone on video is what they are all about. How would anybody learn anything, how would others feel, if every video done by everybody was so darn perfect? Everybody's training video has good points and gaps. That's why we are making them and using them for training. That's why it is good to make mistakes and have them corrected. As a result of this conversation, I realized that I really did need to encourage everyone of the teachers in training on QFS to be watching the videos. So, as a consequence of this, I wrote to the group and suggested that everyone should be watching those training videos and the intro video so as to have all the facts committed to memory. The lines don't have to be memorized, but you do have to know your stuff. I kinda figured that this would reinforce for Sue the value of her video as a teaching tool. Here is exactly what I wrote:

Laura to QFS said:
Meanwhile, as ya'll know, Sue and Bob are here for their EE training. Sue's presentation last night prompts me to encourage ALL of you to watch the training videos at least three times each and also watch the new introduction video at least three times. You need to have all that stuff in your heads, you need to see where this person or that person made a mistake and how it was corrected. You need to be sure that YOU know how to belly breathe, how to pipe breathe, and how to explain both AND round breathing before you get out there in front of a group and purport to be a teacher of this program.

ALSO, READ THE FORUM THREAD. If you are angling to get out there and teach, you need to know what kinds of issues people have had. You need to know that it is not good to teach pipe breathing by just saying "it's kind of like constricting the back of the throat." You need to know why: that people start doing it the wrong way based on that and it is hard to undo a bad habit. They need to take the time to learn that this is a GLOTTAL constriction, similar to glottal constrictions that one does to make sounds. It is those two little muscles - vocal cords - just over the end of the trachea that they will be constricting, NOT the back of the throat.

So, PLEASE, please, please, watch all the videos. Notice all the mistakes. Pay attention to the discussion. Do it again and again and again. This is the only way you are going to really have all this as part of your mental equipment short of coming here and taking a course that lasts for a month and being in a class every single day, learning anatomy, practicing, practicing, practicing.

Since, as I mentioned above, her presentation itself wasn't bad, it was just the lack of correct info, I didn't say anything about Sue' presentation in that email except to mention that her presentation prompted me to encourage everyone to really learn the process. I was also writing in a rush because keeping an eye on the dogs vis a vis the baby and strangers, AND my house and my stuff with a baby here, was kind of a full time job (not to mention making sure there was plenty of food available and looking out for the few people who were left on their feet at this point to take care of the house). Sue and Bob weren't bad about it, but I could see that they had no idea what was valuable and what was not and they tended to allow the baby to be a little bit destructive. Our kitchen table is not so valuable, thank goodness, because it now has a whole new bunch of dents in it from their screw-on high chair and baby banging everything as hard as he could.

So, shortly after I had this conversation with Sue and left it at “I’ll think about it…” I made Ark's breakfast and was taking it upstairs when, for some strange reason, I just fell. In trying to save the plate, I managed to do something to my left leg and right hand. I have two big bruises on the leg and what appears to be a broken little finger on the right hand with a really damaged ligament or chipped bone or something. The knuckle is black under the skin, swollen and very painful. In fact, the whole hand hurts.

Sue came to me again, after lunch and went on about her video again... so I told her that if we had time after Bob did his, and Burma Jones hadn't dropped in his tracks by then (he was already catching the bug), we'd see. I don't think she even thought about the fact of how exhausting it was for us to have to set up the cameras, be present and attentive, go through the whole thing again just so she could present a perfect face. But, if it was really making her so unhappy, I was willing to consider doing it. (I know that everyone else did NOT want to do this because by this time, about everyone in the house was sick except me, Ailén, Burma Jones, Ark and Sue. Bob was, of course, still just recovering.)

Ailén said:
She took the time to go on and on about doing it again, but not for one second did she come to us and asked if we could show her how to belly breathe and do the exercises, so a new presentation would have been a waste of time. We did show her how to do some of the exercises the day before, but she couldn't possibly expect to know them if she hadn't practiced them.

Later she complained that she had been "evaluated and judged" without receiving any training. Was she expecting to get a full-time training with her baby, for free, taking up all Laura's time, when the training is supposed to be the videos, the forum and the discussions we've been having? There was no surprise there, if she hadn't been following.

So, Bob did his presentation. It wasn't bad either. Very nice manner, but not really lively. He warmed up with a little encouragement.

Later on, I was in the kitchen and talked to Sue a bit more about belly breathing (and Bob was there.) Then, the topic of everyone getting sick with the baby's sickness came up and I understood from her that she was sure that the baby got sick from being in our house and only now was realizing that it was the other way around: they brought the sickness with them and all of us were being infected one by one. I pointed out that most sicknesses take 3 days to a week to incubate, so it would have been impossible for them to come down with whatever it was the very first day they were here IF they contracted it here. (I was surprised that she was ignorant of those facts, but kept that to myself.) She immediately wanted to start wiping things down and grabbed a sponge and a bottle of spray cleaner and starting violently wiping stuff in the kitchen. When she got to the kitchen faucet (which the baby had never touched), she didn't realize that it was an extending faucet with a hose that slips back into the neck, and wiped it so hard it bent over sideways and cracked the hose inside the metal links.) I just said "stick it back in, it's okay." (Perceval had to replace the entire faucet unit the day after they left.) She went off somewhere and then, a little bit later, I sent Belibaste to the butcher and heard Sue asking him if she could go and "get out of the house." I didn't think anything about it. I think that it must have been at this point that she logged on and read what I had written to QFS about watching the videos.

I made a big pot of lamb tagine for their last dinner, green beans, Ailén made muffins, etc. Somewhere along around dinner time, I discovered that Sue was very angry at me and was not going to leave her room and come down to eat.

I had, apparently, been horrible to her, humiliating her in front of the group by writing that everyone needed to watch the videos, and further, I had humiliated her because she had entered the room while Bob's presentation was being filmed and heard me say something about people not knowing how to belly breathe, so that was obviously a dig directed at her. (I didn't know she had entered the room!)

Ailén said:
At the end of Bob’s presentation, just after she had entered the room (only Bob and I could see her), Burma Jones told Bob to stop because the camera had suddenly stopped working. He wasn’t able to get it working again. We are talking about an expensive camera, and our essential tool to get videos out. It simply died and must go to the dealer for repairs.

In short, I was the meanest, most wicked woman on the face of the planet and she couldn't bear the sight of me and was going to stay in her room until they could leave early the next morning.

I was pretty shocked, to say the least. I was shocked that she thought that what I had written was a deliberate, unkind, attempt to humiliate her. I was shocked that she thought I had targeted her in a plain, matter-of-fact remark about belly breathing to Bob (especially when I didn't even know she was in the room.) Most of all, I was shocked that she refused to even come down and talk about it. This behavior being manifested by an adult woman, a woman with grown children, a woman who is a school teacher, fer gawd's sake, in someone else's house, was just beyond my capacity to understand.

It's funny how I still let things like this get to me. I spent that whole night lying in bed with my heart hurting, feeling like an elephant was sitting on my chest. And that feeling is only slowly going away.

We talked to Bob about the situation a bit, but I'm going to let the others here in the house recount those conversations since I have used up all my energy just outlining the chronology up to this point. Additional details if you think of anything to ask.

Ailén said:
First, while Sue was having her tantrum, Bob told a few of us in the kitchen how Sue treats her two other sons. Apparently she does everything, cooks for them different meals because the eldest doesn't like what the others eat (he's 23!), she does their laundry, etc. She makes them dependent to the point were they've become parasites. He doesn't have any authority because she gets upset if he tries to impose any discipline. "But it's getting better", he says.

While Sue was in the bedroom, he tried to make her come downstairs but didn't succeed. So he came back and talked to Psyche and I who were cleaning up the kitchen. He said that he was sure she would get over it. We asked him why she had joined the group, and he said that she wanted to test him. She didn't trust us. Ok, after a particular discussion last year, she was OK with the group. But now he felt she was testing him again (don't ask me why he is OK with that attitude). I asked him whether he would still WANT to stay with her if she were to decide that she didn't want to be part of the groups. He replied "I would stay with her and leave the group. And she knows that. I would stay with her because she's a wonderful woman". It was sad to see his denial, him thinking that they were both interested in the truth, and that everything was fine.

He left and came back saying that Sue was hungry. He asked me if I could feed the baby while he took her some food, but it was impossible. As usual, baby didn't want anybody to be around. He fusses and squirms and simply does not like anybody else. So Psyche and I made a plate for Sue and I offered to carry it upstairs to the door, as Bob had to carry the baby, his food and water. When we got to the room, Sue saw me and said he wanted to say goodbye now. She said that she preferred to eat there as she was terribly upset with Laura. In her words, " that was not nice. She has humiliated me in front of the group. That was mean. I can't be in a group where people are not nice." I told her that I hadn't read the post like that, that I was sure that Laura's intention had never been to hurt her in any way, and that I didn't think anybody would interpret it like that. We had already told her that her presentation was OK except for the lack of knowledge, so there was nothing to worry about. But she kept going on about how she had been humiliated and Laura was horrible.

She said several times that being in this group was too hard because people weren't nice. She added that her and Bob had joined because they both wanted a self-sustaining and nice community to be part of. That there was no point in her joining one in Tennessee and him in NY. They had to do something together as a couple. So obviously she has no clue about what this group is about. She just thinks it's a community like others.

I told her that for someone who was so sensitive to niceness, she had been pretty rude considering that Laura had spent all those days trying to make them comfortable, and had spent three hours cooking for her a last dinner with us, while she (Sue) didn't even say goodbye to her hosts.

Not at one point did she consider others. There was no point in giving her any kind of feedback/mirror, because she wouldn't have listened anyway.

That's all I can think of for now, but others will have more to add. The whole thing was totally bizarre and draining.

Belibaste said:
Here are some extra information concerning the visit. I'll try to keep as factual and objective as possible.

- as Laura said when I went to the butcher Sue said she was coming. It was not very considerate because we were in a rush: we needed extra meat for the tajine that was already under preparation. So Sue, Bob, the baby get ready and go in the car. I didn't know why they joined so I asked them, Sue answers that she wants to go away from the germ. I was a bit puzzled since they were the first ones to be sick and anyway it's not by going away from the house for 30 minutes that will help you escape the germ. I didn't comment her answer.

- I drove them a couple of time. Usually the passenger is the one who gets out and open/close the gate. The first time they didn't move so I got out myself and opened and closed the gate. The second time I asked and Bob opened/closed the gate.

- I went to the butcher (2X) the pharmacy (2X) and the supermarket with Bob and/or Sue, they never proposed to contribute to those collective expenses. They only paid for their personal expenses.

- Concerning my paralyzed hand and my recent battle with brain cancer, Sue didn't know about it. Bob knew about it (from QFS). The only time he mentioned it was by saying something like "wouah you recovered well, that's amazing". I didn't perceive much interest on his part. It was quite different from what happened with other members who asked questions and showed a genuine interest/concern. That’s why it was very disconcerting when Sue, during her presentation, thought I was playing games when I could not place my hand on my waist for the three stage breathing. When it was pointed out to her that my hand is partly paralyzed, she was embarrassed. She later asked to have that part edited out of the video.

- The last night before they left I was starting to get sick but I said I would try to drive them to the station since everyone else was already sick and vomiting. At midnight I vomited and had a very bad night. At 6.00 am Bob was knocking on my door. I got up and drove them to the station. I carried half the luggage in the car, out of the car, in the train, got their tickets at the desk, waited for the train with them, found their wagon, walked them to their booked seats and I didn't perceive much compassion from them though I had said I was sick and I had vomited in the night.

Andromeda said:
Here's my weigh-in. I have to say that I didn't think much of Sue when I met her during Casstoberfest in 2007. She did and said a few tactless things that made me doubt the sincerity of her friendliness, and made her appear to be looking for flaws. Since then, I had heard that she was doing some things here and there to be involved in the groups and was making some diet changes because the baby was suffering from allergies, and I thought that she was coming along and probably just needed a little time and encouragement. So, my mission during their stay was to try to make her feel comfortable and observe where she was at.

By their 3rd day here, I realized that I was having a hard time liking either Sue OR the baby! Weird, because I have never met a baby that I didn't like! There was something 'off'' about him. He didn't feel, smell, act or look right.....and I feel terrible saying that, but there it is. Sue lost points with me on a regular basis with the way she interacted with baby. There was none of the normal encouragement to try things or explanations of how things work. I started to wonder if part of the baby's problem was lack of healthy stimulation and autonomy. {in spite of the breastfeeding and co-sleeping} she wasn't a doting mother. I was shocked that she wanted to take him to the store while he was vomiting because she wanted to get out of the house! Hardly a motherly word from her mouth. In fact, the way she talked about her two older sons and her students was rather unkind.

While observing all of this, I was considering the facts that they were all in a different environment, were sick and tired and may have not been themselves either....until the day before they left when I started leaning towards the belief that Sue was essentially selfish and baby Damian was sent to kill us all with his disease.

The day before they left was the day I started coming down really sick. I had already not been feeling well but had pushed on to be there for the training and general guest care because most everybody else was worse off. I almost choked on my mate that morning when Sue announced that she wanted us all to gather back in the living room for a second round because she was worried that she didn't do well enough and would feel embarrassed.

I nevertheless promised to try to be there and said that at worst we could set the cameras up and let her do it on her own. She didn't seem to understand that her request was an added burden and she then turned around and asked if anyone was going out because she'd like to get out of the house again. I was thinking, "Geez, lady! Everyone here is sick or recovering on top of having other things to do, can't you take a walk?!" But Ailén told her that someone may be going out and the matter was dropped.

I went to lay down for a bit, and the next thing I hear from Perceval who had gone down to get me a cup of tea, is that Sue had isolated herself in her room and was refusing to come out because Mom had humiliated her by suggesting that people should watch the training videos before coming for training!

My gawd, could this woman get any sillier?!

I was in bed early that night and missed the talk with Bob and didn't see any of them again before they left. I was mostly glad about that too. Bob left a note saying goodbye for all of them to the people who were not up early to see them off - which was everyone except Belibaste and Athena I think. Ailén filled me in on the Bob talk and some of the rantings she received from Sue when she took a dinner plate up to her.

I was shocked that a grown woman would behave so, and was also worried by the way Bob was not handling the situation.

On top of the whole visit being draining and making everyone sick I found out that one of our two video cameras broke when she walked in the room the night before. Add this to a major power outage, a broken dessert dish, a broken computer, a broken faucet, Mom falling and hurting herself quite badly, and now the dogs are throwing up........eeek!

Perceval said:
Well, I don't have much to add, but I'll give my impressions anyway.

The two days before they arrived I was down, but not out, with the fluy type thing that Laura mentioned. It wasn't really that bad, but I decided that rather than do my normal "struggle on" thing, I would just stay in bed and get some reading and writing done that I never seem to have time to do. I was up on the morning of the 14th for a secret mission, and then back to bed for the rest of the day. They arrived in the afternoon that day. So I didn't see them until the following day, in the afternoon. By then I was feeling pretty much well again.

First impressions were that Bob was his usual reserved and quiet self. Sue was also as I remembered her, superficial and giving off that "I'm not here because I'm interested, I'm here because HE'S MINE!"

The baby was, well a baby, but over the next day or two, as others have said, this wasn't your average 15 month old, at least not in my experience {4 nephews and a niece}. Very sedate, little responsiveness to others, no matter how entertaining they were, only wanted to cling to mommy. He would barely tolerate Bob. Maybe a lot of that was down to the fact that he was ill, but I'm inclined not to think so because he was no different after the throwing up subsided.

I have to agree with Andromeda that Sue did not come across as an attentive loving mother. This is gonna sound crazy but, for me there was a sense that both of them (Sue and the baby) were consciously using the other for their own selfish purposes. Like they had made a pact of some sort.

So yeah, Sue and Bob brought this 24 hour stomach bug with them. I had just recovered from the flu type thing and was on my second day of my second three day DMSA course. The dose was higher this time so I was expecting some mercury "chelation" reactions, and I got them that night, right about the time that the stomach bug from hell got the better of me too. So that night was NOT good. The whole next day I was in bad shape, no throwing up but stomach really unsettled. So I stayed in bed. Came down briefly that evening and heard a little of the discussion with Bob around the kitchen table, and then the next morning early they were gone.

All in all, Sue was clearly not interested in anything we do. Bob was more or less brain dead. I really don't know if that is the way he normally is because we have only met him once before. But we all know the vectoring effects of being too close to someone who is determined to drag you away.

Psyche said:
I have worked in an infectious disease unit in a Children's Hospital, and have been exposed to the most unimaginable aggressive bugs and still never came down sick like this.

Anyhow, a few more impressions... I really thought that Sue was waiting all this time for any opportunity to lash out at Laura and the groups. Even if it was unconscious. It seems like a repetition of the same dynamic of last year, only that much, much worse and this time her true ugly colors show. Bob says that Sue is a great woman and he will not leave her, that they have many interests in common. He seems to be parroting a line of E-harmony, where they actually met. It is actually bizarre. He seems to be aware of so much of her manipulations and maneuvers, yet he is so much denial and just lets her get her way. He is the deluded knight in shinning armor for that pitiful damsel. He should read Unholy Hungers.

It seems they only have read The Narcissistic Family by the Pressmans, who practice in Rhode Island. Bob said that they took Sue’s son (the teenager?) to them. Bob told us that Sue came to see one of the Pressman's {case} notes, that she wasn't suppose to read. It said about her son: "very, very, very, very, very, very lost". So she was all distressed saying that she couldn't do this, that it was too much for her. {Helping her son sort out his issues via therapy.}

Other than that, I admit that I didn't have the patience nor the mood for Sue, so sometimes I will just sit in the kitchen, watching Laura explaining all kinds of things to her in a very dedicated way. I figured that at least I could observe Laura and learn one day to be that dedicated.... In short, I can't believe how incredibly rude Sue was with us and specially with Laura of all people. And Bob is just trying to calm her down, so everything can be fixed up by e-mail or something...

Mr. Scott said:
I can add a few little details and observations.

First of all, the main electrical breaker out on the pole: it was old, and we were told that after it trips so many times, it eventually just wears out. So, the night before the gang arrived, the breaker wouldn't stay on. As Laura mentioned, Belibaste worked wonders and got the power company guy to come out within 10 minutes. That was a small miracle! We had pretty much concluded that the only thing that made any sense was that the main breaker was bad.

When he removed it, Mr. Power Company said something to the effect of, "Uh-oh! The breaker stays switched on when it's disconnected from the electrical feed. That means it's probably a fault in the wiring inside the house." As I understand these things, he should have been right. But he wasn't. When he installed the new big breaker, it worked fine. So, that was pretty weird, and we took note of it. Still, weird stuff happens all the time around here!

Then the trio arrived, and things were okay. I did note that Sue had a habit of saying "Hi!" every time she saw me, regardless of when she had seen me last. If I had just spoken with her or said hello in the kitchen, and 5 minutes later she saw me in the hall, she'd say "Hi!" again like she hadn't yet seen me that day. Well, that doesn't necessarily have to be weird, because sometimes people do that when they're feeling really insecure. So, again, it was noted, but it wasn't exactly concrete evidence of anything.

Like Perceval, I had also just finished my latest hardcore round of DMSA, which is seriously taxing. The DMSA followed FINALLY getting over the last superbug we were hit by. With DMSA, I get aching joints, crazy emotions, fatigue, and so on. It's a little bit like willfully throwing oneself under a herd of stampeding buffalo. Okay, maybe that's a BIT of an exaggeration... So, I was quite happy that the latest round was over just before people arrived. The next day, I worked out because I was finally feeling normal again. I felt great, until I woke up the next day, when I learned that not only was Athena sick, but Perceval got hit with it. I wasn't feeling terribly well that morning myself, and I ended up in bed for the rest of day with the stomach bug. I had a crazy fever and the whole nine yards. When I was finally feeling "better", I went to the post office, and by the time I got back, I felt awful again. I ended up sleeping 3.5 hours and woke up in the early evening feeling better again.

At one point (I don't remember exactly when because it's all one big "blur of sickness" lately), I remarked to Laura that I hadn't been this sick in like 10 years.

I also remarked to Psyche a day or two before The Sue Event that I was wondering if Sue would find something to get upset about, because things just didn't seem "right". Back during Casstoberfest, some of you may remember her freaking out about some comments that were made about not understanding how anyone would want to bring children into this world, knowing what they now know. Sue got very upset by this, and things were "smoothed over" for her benefit. This time around, I wasn't really sure why they had come, because they didn't seem that interested in most of the things we were doing, and Sue herself had revealed on the drive to the house from the airport (when they first arrived) that she was still pretty, um, "sceptical" about a lot of things - like the diet for example.

She even went so far as to ask, "So, is Psyche like a REAL doctor? I mean, did she go to medical school??" When I explained that Psyche was not only a real doctor, but the youngest grad from her med school, studied in 3 countries, develops all her medical opinions from cutting edge research done in various fields, and so on, Sue didn't really seem impressed or even satisfied. She just stopped asking questions. I don't think she actually cared about the answers, the evidence, etc. She just wanted to find something wrong - something to get upset about... It seemed to me like she wanted to find a place to hammer in her wedge.

As for Bob, he seemed to be pretty much under Sue's thumb. He was just sort of a quiet, reserved scientist type. However, it seems to me that he is getting something from the relationship if he thinks Sue is a "wonderful woman".

Finally, Sue also had a very hard time remembering anyone's name…

Andromeda said:
I'm glad Mr. Scott brought this up because I had forgotten to tell it. The day before they left, Sue and I were alone in the kitchen for a minute and as I was trying to blow some of my feeling sick off as PMS, she tried to involve me in a conversation about having babies. First she mentioned that she had thought recently that she was prego again, and then she asked if I had ever been pregnant. I told her that I had not and she pushed to ask if I was going to try and then - why not? I was sure that she must have remembered that I had stated during Casstoberfest that I couldn't think of a single altruistic reason to purposefully get pregnant at a time when our world is as it is. It almost seemed like she was trying to get me to say something disapproving. I said that my lack of mother fever was because I had to help take care of younger siblings and that I really understood what a responsibility having a child was.

Another thing that struck me as a little funny: Right after their arrival, Bob decided to take a quick shower to freshen up. There was something that Mom suggested he was going to need, so Ailén offered to run it upstairs to him so that Sue and baby didn't have to get up. Sue jumped up and practically RAN up the stairs yelling behind her that "You never know, Bob might be naked!" AS IF anyone in this house wouldn't knock on a closed bathroom door or would even care if Bob was naked!

Burma Jones said:
I had some involvement with the autism community in L.A. through a close friend who was heavily involved. The first thing I thought when I saw the baby was "Asperger syndrome" or high-functioning autistic. I hadn't seen the baby do anything yet when I thought that. That was partly why I thought it. The kid just didn't do *anything*. There was also a look to the face that reminded me of pretty much every autistic kid I've met.

After spending time with Bob and Sue, it doesn't surprise me that they wouldn't notice. Sadly, Asperger kids can learn to live pretty normal lives, but not when their parents refuse to even acknowledge that there is a problem.

There are a lot of theories about the causes of autism. What seems to be the most likely to me, given the clustering pattern of autistic children (they pop up in clusters that might correlate to vaccine batches), is that it is genetics that are triggered by toxicity that overwhelms the child's immune system. Given his (lack of) social skills, I have to wonder if Bob carries the genetics. Maybe the triggering comes from the toxicity of Sue' breast milk.

I should point out that there is a lot of controversy about the very idea of autism clusters. According to an article in the LA Times, "In the U.S., the children of older, white and highly educated parents are more likely to receive a diagnosis of autism or autism spectrum disorder." This is used to dismiss the idea that autism is related to environmental factors and is, instead, related to the likelihood of diagnosis. Apparently, if you are older, white and highly educated, you are more likely to notice that something ain't right with your kid and seek professional help. Interestingly, Bob and Sue are older, white and highly educated...but no diagnosis, no help.

So, it could just be that older white people have a tendency to have babies that are more susceptible to toxins. There is an interesting article in The JHU Gazette on autism and brain inflammation ( that states:

A Johns Hopkins study has found new evidence that the brains of some people with autism show clear signs of inflammation, suggesting that the disease may be associated with activation of the brain's immune system...

Autism has a strong genetic component in some families, although other causes likely play a role, possibly including birth complications, diet, toxins or infections, Pardo said...

Compared with normal control brains, the brains of people with autism showed evidence of an ongoing inflammatory process in different regions of the brain and produced by cells known as microglia and astroglia...

Pardo and colleagues are now studying how the genetic background of patients and families may influence immune system reactions in the brain associated with autism.

ADDED: An email from Bob with corrections:

Just read the transcript and the intro. I have to say, first off, there are some factual errors. I actually met Sue in January of 2006 before I had become a Sott editor and before I joined QFS in 2008 so there wouldn't have been any asking for feedback. We were engaged before we came to Casstoberfest. We were just thinking about getting married in France. I'm not sure why Belibaste said I didn't offer to pay for anything. I paid the butcher tab which came close to 50 euros and paid for the pharmaceutical items. I'm certainly sorry for all the pain we put you through. I'd ask for more help, but you've done way more than enough. Put your energy elsewhere.

And now, for the session.
Session Date: February 22rd 2010

Laura, Ark, Andromeda, Perceval, Burma Jones, Belibaste, PoB, Bubbles, Ailén, Mr. Scott, Psyche

Q: (L) Today is February 22, 2010. We're two years away from 2012. Whoa!

A: Not to worry

Q: (L) And who do we have with us?

A: Kileia of Cassiopaea

Q: (L) What are we not to worry about?

A: 2012. Much ado!

Q: (L) Alright. Anything further on that topic?

A: No

Q: (L) Okay. I guess what's uppermost on everybody's mind is the events of the past week with the visit of Bob and Sue and the baby. I dunno. Does anyone have a framed question about it?

(Andromeda) Is the baby autistic?

A: Yes.

Q: (Belibaste) What we were wondering is, is Sue an agent or is she just aggressive unconsciously? [ash bin hatch on wood stove falls and makes a loud banging noise] [nervous laughter]

(Perceval) That's your answer!

A: Sue is not a conscious agent, but is hostess to the tools of the "trade".

Q: (L) What do you mean by, "tools of the trade"?

A: Energies that vector as well as transmit and receive.

Q: (L) Is this like a physical implant?

A: Yes.

Q: (L) Was she planted in Bob’s life just to come and spy on us?

A: Not so much you as Bob.

Q: (Burma Jones) Because of his work with {gov agency}?

A: And more.

Q: (Burma Jones) Also, he said that some of his bosses, or people he has worked for, are people who are implicated in Climategate. Does it have something to do with his meteorological work?

A: He travels in interesting circles.

Q: (Psyche) Does it have to do with his contact with people like this son of the head of {big news organization} that they stayed with in Paris?

A: Yes.

Q: (Mr. Scott) Okay, so he's not just a little quiet scientist...

A: He is, but recall Pat Z****. {Referred to in other sessions from 1995}

Q: (L) Pat Z***. She was just in the secretarial pool at Fort Detrick, married to one of their researchers – a physicist, Victor Z*** who also did some pattern recognition work for the Mars probe - and the C's said that she had an implant that they used to watch her bosses and her husband and his bosses through him via her.

(Perceval) An implant by who?

(L) Who, Pat Z***?

(Perceval) Yeah.

(L) I dunno if we ever asked if hers was military, or if it was like Alien.

A: At some levels they are the same.

Q: (L) So are you suggesting that Bob also has an implant to watch the people around him, or is it that she learns about them through him, like at a remove?

A: Yes.

Q: (L) So why didn't they just put an implant in him?

A: Strong willed.

Q: (L) But obviously, being strong willed doesn't mean that you can't be gotten to through your emotions. Oh, yeah. That’s why Sue...

A: Exactly. It should be a lesson to many; it is also a tale as old as time.

Q: (L) It boggles the mind that Bob thought he could find a wife through an online dating service and NOT take that risk! Okay, I had this dream about a plane crashing and burning the second night they were here. Was my dream related in any way to Sue, or was it related to the plane crash that then actually did happen {that very day} where the guy flew into the IRS building?

A: Why not both? The same signaling method can produce multiple responses.

Q: (L) So Sue' behavior was influenced by signals?

A: Yes.

Q: (L) Well, ya know, that's a really bad situation because if a person is basically kind of innocent, and say they've been implanted for some nefarious purpose, and then they fall in love with someone, and there is a lot of emotional involvement all around, it's like that person has been innocently duped and used. It's really more of a tragedy than any fault of their own that they're being used as an unwitting agent.

A: How come Sue "fell for" Bob?

Q: (L) Well, I dunno. How come?

A: Programming, not real emotion.

Q: (Perceval) Are we to assume that Sue was placed in Bob's life to monitor him because of his association with us?

A: Yes.

Q: (L) If he'd just been a good boy that had been following the program and minding his P's and Q's, then...

(Perceval) So they're concerned that because he moves in interesting circles, his association with us would be a danger. If he wasn't associated with us, he wouldn't be a danger to them?

A: Yes.

Q: (Perceval) Ya know what's really a bummer about this? We didn't get any of this information. We don't know what circles he moves in. Obviously, if they see him as a threat, there might have been something he could have...

(L) There might have been beneficial interaction between him and the group, our work, that sort of thing. (Perceval) But he was never really forthcoming about any of it.

A: Bob has his own real emotional issues.

Q: (L) Such as?

A: The usual: wounds of the soul.

Q: (L) You say "wounds of the soul". Does that suggest past life, or present life?

A: Both.

Q: (Ailén) What about Sue? Is there anybody home?

(Bubbles) Can she be helped?

A: The essence is there, but terribly stunted and deformed. The false personality is a strong one.

Q: (Andromeda) Has she been messed with all of her life, like since she was young?

A: Since before her father died.

Q: (Ailén) Geez...

(Bubbles) Can she be fixed?

A: That would be up to her, but not extremely likely.

Q: (L) Okay. Let's go back to the baby. Now, the question was already asked: "Is he autistic?" I think I would have asked the question differently. I would have asked, "Is something wrong with him?" You answered already the question, "Is he autistic?" with "Yes". Is this autism that he is exhibiting, is it genetic or just chemical?

A: Both in this case.

Q: (L) Is it severe?

A: Can be.

Q: (L) In other words, at this point, it could be ameliorated. Is that it?

A: Yes. But Sue has so much to do with her own issues it is not likely that she can do what is necessary.

Q: (L) Bubbles had a dream.

(Bubbles) Oh yeah. What was that thing – like a demon – that appeared and I was talking to it and it said it lived in “Never-never land” and was “sustained by children?” That it got its sustenance from children?

A: That was the way your mind expressed the psychic perception of the energies surrounding Sue due to her special status.

Q: (Bubbles) Oh. So, did they bring anything with them when they came?

(L) I think they're saying that you were perceiving something and your mind interpreted it as demonic... Well, maybe I better not assume: was there anything truly otherworldly or demonic involved there?

A: A little.

Q: (Andromeda) What about all the high strangeness that we experienced at the time they left the U.S. to come here, the power failure, Bubbles’s computer going dead, and then all the other craziness that was happening, like Mom’s fall, the camera breaking, everybody except Sue getting sick, the faucet in the kitchen breaking when she was scrubbing it and maybe a couple things I forgot?

A: Due to that "little".

Q: (Ailén) What would happen if it was a lot?

(L) All hell would have broken loose! So, in other words, germs, the fall, the power outage, the broken camera, the broken faucet, Bubbles's broken computer... That was not so little!

A: You kidding?!

Q: [laughter] (Perceval) Well, yeah, it was little compared to what it could have been.

(L) Yeah, it was just little stuff.

(Perceval) At least nothing came out [like aliens or demons] and tried to eat anybody!

(Bubbles) Do people like that attract creatures?

A: Yes.

Q: (Perceval) Was she abducted to install her implant?

A: Oh yes. Why do you think she is so resistant to the topic of aliens and UFOs? It has been programmed into her.

Q: (L) I've seen people like that. They are so violently opposed to even consider the possibility and then, if they have to consider it for some reason, they don't want to talk about it. It's like an unbreakable program. And then you find out that they've got weird things going on in their lives, and you figure out that they themselves must have been abducted. But even if you show it to them, cite the facts, the evidence, the witnesses, nothing penetrates.

A: It can't. It has a failsafe program.

Q: (L) In other words, they can't be gotten through to at all. If they acknowledge that as a possibility, they'll lose their mind or something?

A: Yes.

Q: (L) And I guess at some level they know it, so their rejection of it is more or less self-defense. They are people who can never know or acknowledge the truth about reality, by design. That’s really sad. (Perceval) It kind of limits the potential to do anything with us. (Bubbles) Is it possible that some of us have implants like Sue?

A: No.

Q: (Bubbles) Good. [laughter]

(Ailén) Is there anything that can be done for Bob? Is there any point in trying to keep him connected to us?

(Ark) Why should we do anything for him if he doesn't want it?

(Perceval) It's up to him.

A: Let him ask.

Q: (Burma Jones) Is there anything we could have done to protect ourselves from the little meanies coming in?

A: You actually did quite well!

Q: (L) So it could have been a LOT worse! [laughter]

A: Yes.

Q: (L) That's comforting to know.

(Perceval) Our evasive maneuver was to get sick and hide in our bedrooms! [laughter]

(Andromeda) Is part of Sue' program to try to separate Bob from us in some way?

A: Yes.

Q: (Perceval) Poor Bob.

(Andromeda) Poor Sue.

(L) Should we publish the information in this session with the names changed, of course?

A: Why not? A lot to be learned by others.

Q: (Ailén) But then Bob will know. And Sue will know.

A: You can wait a bit.

Q: (L) So anything else about the Bob and Sue situation?

(Ark) Can the camera be fixed? {a 3,000 dollar piece of equipment}.

A: Yes.

Q: (Mr. Scott) Can it be fixed if Laura does an exorcism, or do we have to send it in? That's the question. [laughter]

(Burma Jones) Was there anything symbolic about how that camera went out, or was it just Sue sort of sending some psychic energy?

A: EM bursts.

Q: [short break to discuss answers] (L) So we've got a couple of questions now. Well, this scenario that has been described about Bob and Sue and us suggests either time travel, or as Burma Jones said that they've got a whole lot of women floating around that are preprogrammed and prepared to be activated and used when and where needed. So, which is it?

A: Both.

Q: (Perceval) They cover all bases.

(Bubbles) Did someone make an effort to go back in time to mould Sue' future the way they wanted it?

A: Yes.

Q: (L) Well, that's entertaining to say the least. (Bubbles) Who went back in time to mould her future?

A: "Them".

Q: (Bubbles) That's vague. Them who?

A: Consortium.

Q: (Bubbles) Consortium?

(Perceval) It's in the transcripts. Look it up.

(L) Well, let me ask a few questions that we've got here. Who's question is this?

(Ailén) Horus-something on the forum.

(L) Okay, it's talking about the "Alice in Wonderland Syndrome":

"According to Wikipedia: 'Alice in Wonderland Syndrome' (AIWS, named after the novel written by Lewis Carroll), also known as Todd's syndrome, which is a disorienting neurological condition which affects human perception. Sufferers may experience micropsia, macropsia, and/or size distortion of other sensory modalities."

"My wife and I are both prone to this. She actually had a case of this last night, and after speaking to her on the phone, found out that today she has migraine symptoms. While under the effects of AIWS, she typically sees things as being small and far away. She describes her field of vision as being like looking through the large end of a cone towards the small end, for instance, like looking through a telescope backwards. I typically experience this phenomenon as objects seeming very close and large, for instance it feels like I could lay in bed and reach out and touch the ceiling or the wall across the room. This typically happens when I am tired and am preparing to go to sleep."

(L) So anyway, his question is:

"What is the cause of Alice in Wonderland syndrome?"

A: Brain disorder.

Q: (L) Well, we kind of know that it's a brain disorder.

A: Signaling function due to improper or defective myelinization.

Q: (L) In other words, they've got short circuits in the brain?

A: Yes. And in the optical pathways particularly.

Q: (Ark) Can it be of some use or advantage for people that have it?

A: None that we can find.

Q: (Ailén) Is there any cure?

A: Possibly dietary adjustments over the long term.

Q: (L) He says, "What are the implications of the altered perception of 3rd dimensional space while undergoing these symptoms?"

A: Diminished objectivity.

Q: (L) He then asks, "Is this some form of 4th dimensional 'bleedthrough'?"

A: No.

Q: (L) Well, what his wife is describing sounds more like an optical thing, so that sounds like something is wrong with her eyes.

A: Retinal disorder.

Q: (L) And his, he says he feels like he could lay in bed and reach out and touch the ceiling, and this particularly happens when he's about to go to sleep.

A: In his case it is mainly brain chemistry triggered.

Q: (Perceval) She's gonna be walking into doors, and he's gonna be opening them before he gets to them.

(Burma Jones) I have a quick question about that. When I was a kid, I had that a lot. Was mine then brain chemistry triggered?

A: Yes. Lots of serotonin then.

Q: (L) I had that happen to me once.

(Bubbles) So did I.

(L) I think it was when I was laying in bed going to sleep.

(Burma Jones) It was always when I was laying in bed.

(Perceval) I would get it when I would sit and concentrate for too long. Things would seem a little magnified.

(L) It seems to be brain chemistry induced.

(Perceval) Or maybe eye strain.

(Burma Jones) Mine definitely wasn't my eyes. It would seem like the door on the far wall over there would be like 50 feet away.

(L) I had a couple little glitches happen with my eyes when I was growing up. I remember once I was seeing double for about 10 minutes. But it was so intense that I couldn't make it stop. I don't know what triggered it, and then it never happened again. And then I woke up one night and I was blind. I couldn't see at all. I felt my way through the house to the bathroom, and got myself back to bed. For some reason, I wasn't terribly distressed about it - I just went back to sleep. When I woke up the next morning, everything was back to normal.

(Bubbles) I've had that happened to me before, but it only lasted a couple of seconds.

(L) So I think there's all kinds of interesting things that can happen in the brain. The brain is a really delicate complex structure. That it works as well as it does with so few glitches is a miracle!

(Ark) But I wonder because it is a very small probability that two people meet and have the same essential condition. Maybe there is some chemical in their house?

(L) That triggers it? Is it possible that there is something in their house, some kind of toxicity they're exposed to?

A: Yes. Dietary!

Q: (L) Okay, here's this other question:

"That was really an interesting article posted by Psyche [on the forum]. The authors implied that cereal agriculture is a recent innovation among human beings, only developed in the last 10 thousand years. Maybe the question for the C's is whether earlier civilizations ate any cereal grains at all, or whether they even practiced agriculture as we know it today. Or, did earlier civilizations have information that we don't have because they weren't being influenced by cereal grain diets?"

A: We wonder why this reader has not read the transcripts or your writings as the answer is there.

Q: (L) You mean like the 19-year cycle and the mother stone and the whole transdimensional thing that I wrote about in Secret History?

A: Yes.

Q: (L) In other words, what you're saying is that they did not practice agriculture. Is that correct?

A: Yes.

Q: (L) And that cereal agriculture and agriculture in general and as a whole is something that has been developed only in the last 10 thousand years and is as a result of our so-called "fall" from that state wherein we could practice technospirituality. Is that it?

A: Yes

Q: (Perceval) Techno-agro-spirituality!

A: Soon to be restored!

Q: (Perceval) Is kamut okay for us to eat? It's like "old wheat".

A: Yes. When in Rome...

Q: (L) In other words, when in 3rd density without the ability to exercise techno-spirituality, one does what one must. Is that basically it?

A: Yes.

Q: (Bubbles) We used to do techno-spirituality?

(L) Yeah, humanity, yeah.

(Bubbles) So, we've regressed so much that we can't anymore?

A: That and change in cosmic environment.

Q: (L) So it's a change in cosmic environment or vibrations or something.

(Bubbles) But the vibrations are gonna change back soon, right?

A: Yes.

Q: (Bubbles) Cool!

(Andromeda) And then we can materialize our own food and it'll be good for us.

(Perceval) Materialize our own healthy food.

(Mr. Scott) We'll be able to manifest healthy pizzas!! [laughter]

A: Yes

Q: (Mr. Scott) Whoa, SWEET!!! And it will even taste like mozzarella cheese?!

A: Yes if you wish!

Q: (Mr. Scott) Oh my god...

(Bubbles) We'll be our own genies?

A: More or less.

Q: (Bubbles) Can I ask a question? What everybody's doing here and what we do in the future, will it have an impact on the future? Will it be remembered?

A: One hopes!

Q: (L) I think that's a yes.

(Bubbles) At least a hundred years from now, will we have made an impact on the world?

A: That is the plan.

Q: (Bubbles) So, cool.

(Perceval) Now you just have to make it happen.

(Bubbles) I said all of us! I just have one more question. Can you give Ark a hint on how to build a time machine or improve his theories? [laughter]

A: We are!

Q: (L) They’re giving him a hand.

(Burma Jones) I have one quick question speaking on brain stuff... You mentioned brain zaps before. I get these things that are more like a "FZZT". It's usually when I'm really tired and just waking up. I looked it up and it seemed to be from what I could find that it's just one of those things that no one can explain. So, I just would like a hint as to where I could find out what it is, or if it's something I should worry about?

A: Not to worry. Once you detox the mercury it will stop.

Q: (Burma Jones) It's like a little thermometer in my head!

(Perceval) What's the percentage of clinical psychopaths in the whole world?

A: 6.5

Q: (Perceval) How many of those are female?

A: 1.7

Q: (Ark) But the females are more dangerous.

A: Yes.

Q: (L) So, now wait a minute, was that 1.7 of the 6.5?

A: No.

Q: (L) So, that's 1.7 IN the 6.5?

A: Yes.

Q: (Belibaste) I wanted to ask about this psychopathic thing in the lowlands. I wanted to know in what year that the lowlands got the higher percentage of psychopathy, and what was this percentage?

A: 18 century 9 percent

Q: (L) I would say 9% would be really high in the 18th century.

(Bubbles) Okay, this is a very mundane question and you're all going to laugh at me, but has anybody ever figured out why cats purr?

A: Self stimulation of the vagus nerve or the cat equivalent.

Q: (Bubbles) Now I know! It's a question I've been wanting to know the answer to since I was 4.

(Mr. Scott) So Kitty does Eiriu Eolas all day, all the time.

(Bubbles) That's why cats live for so long.

(Ailén) That's why they have 9 lives.

(L) What else? My back hurts.

A: Hiho! Goodbye.

A: He is, but recall Pat Z****. {Referred to in other sessions from 1995}

Here is the relevant session.

session 960107 said:
Q: (L) Hello
A: Oops!
Q: (L) And who do we have this evening?
A: Turrin.
Q: (L) And where are you communicating from?
A: Cassiopaea.
Q: (L) We have P*** with us tonight...
A: Hello P***
Q: (L) Now, with all of us here, we would like to ask why the black, flying
boomerangs showed up on the night P*** first came for hypnosis?
A: Examine issue carefully.
Q: (L) The first thing we thought about it was that this was a, if not necessarily rare, at
least rarely observed type of craft, and the event itself was rare... is this correct?
A: It is rare.
Q: (L) If it is rare for it to occur in response to hypnosis session, which person were
the UFO's particularly interested in?
A: It was not a person, but information that is hidden in the subconscious memory of
Q: (L) Were they wanting to get this information?
A: No. To monitor what would be revealed.
Q: (L) Does this mean that P*** has information programmed into her before birth
that she needs to access?
A: No. Abductions.
Q: (L) They wanted to see if anything would be revealed about their abductions of
A: Yes.
Q: (L) Okay, since she is here, can we ask who abducted her?
A: Grays.
Q: (L) How many times has she been abducted?
A: 4. Snow scene was only 3rd density.
Q: (P) Does that mean that the snow scene was only in this realm?
A: No. Abduction which occurred there was strictly physical.
Q: (L) Okay, the abduction that occurred in the snow was a physical abduction.
Perhaps the others were not. Were they physical also?
A: The others were 4th density. 3rd density abduction only occurs rarely, and is of
great import.
Q: (L) What is of great import that is connected to this abduction?
A: Review.
Q: (P) Was my son abducted?
A: Frozen.
Q: (L) Why did they want P*** so bad that they would take her physically?
A: Do you have any ideas?
Q: (L) Yes, I have ideas. Maybe P*** has ideas and knowledge that she could
access to work against these beings?
A: But real reason is more fundamental.
Q: (L) Were they abducting P*** to harvest eggs?
A: No.
Q: (L) To harvest energy?
A: Would you like to learn or play "20 questions?"
Q: (L) I would like to learn and get to the bottom of this.
A: You answered your own enquiry earlier.
Q: (L) Because she had information they wanted to get from her?
A: No, no, no.
Q: (L) What did I say?
A: Exposure.
Q: (L) Oh, they fear that she will act in some way to expose them...
A: Government proximities!
Q: (L) Oh! When I was talking earlier about people who have someone working for
the government, such people tend to be abducted more. And just because P*** was
married to a scientist who worked at JPL doesn't mean she knew anything. Does she
know something?
A: Not what she knew.
Q: (L) Was it because of where she lived?
A: Because of proximity to consortium activity.
Q: (P) Was that activity in the tunnel?
A: Implanted for possible future activation.
Q: (L) So, because of your proximity to the people you were living around and
interacting with, you had an implant designed to control you if need be. (P) Was this
related to what was going on under the mountain? (L) What mountain? What's under
the mountain? (P) Just ask.
A: Not locator, personnel are factored.
Q: (L) Okay, it is not where you were so much as who you were in contact with.
A: Yes.
Q: (L) Was it her husband?
A: Perhaps.
Q: (L) Maybe that is why there is a higher rate of abduction among family members of
government employees, so that they can be activated or controlled? (P) But my
husband wasn't really working on anything secret.
A: He had access to sensitive facilities.
Q: (L) Did he have a security clearance or was he friends with others who did? (P) I
had a security clearance. (L) So, P had an implant put in. An actual, physical implant.
Where is it?
A: Behind sinus cavity.
Q: (L) What is this implant designed to do?
A: Activate behavioral control reflex and thought pattern generation and alteration.
Q: (P) Is that why I can't remember anything?
A: Some.
Q: (L) Did you ever have headaches or nose or ear problems? (P) No, but I do have
this memory problem in a big way. (L) What is the main part of the memory problem
P has? Can you give us any more on that?
A: No.
Q: (L) So, can I say that this UFO appeared over my house on the night P was under
hypnosis, to reinforce the implant so that she would not be able...
A: To monitor.
Q: (L) If P had revealed the details of her abduction, would there have been any
A: Not in this case.
Q: (L) Are there cases when persons reveal details of their abductions, that there are
A: Varied.
Q: (L) So, if P had gone to anyone, these craft would have appeared?
A: Yes.
Q: (L) You have already told us that this is extremely rare. Did P have an abduction
experience of unusual significance?
A: 3rd density.
Q: (L) Okay, what else was unusual?
A: Discover.
Q: (P) Does this have anything to do with Camp David?
A: Not the issue, its personnel!
Q: (L) Did you know somebody? Was it that she knew someone or interacted with
someone in particular?
A: Many others!
Q: (P) If I started naming people, could we get to it?
A: Not necessary.
Q: (L) Well, there is an issue here that we need to get to. (P) Do the planes have
anything to do with it?
A: It is up to P, the extent she wishes to retrieve and divulge, the many unusual
experiences that were met, by P, with unusual indifference.
Q: (P) The first thing unusual was the geographic location of our house. Directly West
of us was the mountain that housed all the communications to be used in the event of
nuclear war. We were 13 miles North of Camp David. And, while we lived there,
many, many things took place at Camp David that were of global significance. And,
we built a barn in 1982 and had bought the house in 1976, and never, in all the years
that I lived there, did I ever notice these planes until we built the barn. If I had a stick
in my hand, I could have touched them, that's how low they flew. Right over my barn.
The same day every week. And there was always two of them, and they never had a
single marking on them. And, they were propeller planes. And I wondered: what in
the hell is this country doing flying planes, unmarked, propeller driven, and so low,
over this area? This continued until we moved from that house. So, these planes came
twice a week from 1982 until 1989. (L) What were these planes?
A: Search to learn.
Q: (L) Well, obviously we need to discuss this to develop our synapses. (P) Well,
after the first couple of times, I sort of just said: "Well, there are the planes." So, what
else is new?
A: Indifference.
Q: (P) I thought the planes had something to do with the mountain. Did they?
A: Maybe.
Q: (P) We knew they were flying under radar. Now, that I am thinking about this,
nobody else ever talked about these planes. It was like we were the only people that
ever saw them, or people who were at our house saw them too. My best friend who
lived right up the road never saw them. I asked her: "Did you see the planes?" and she
said "What planes?" I mean, she was seven acres away and nothing in between!
A: Unusual experiences mount!
Q: (P) V** also noticed these things and he would always say - he was less
indifferent than I was - he would say: "what in the hell are those planes and what are
they doing?" (L) Why was P so indifferent? (P) Well, it didn't affect MY life, except
that I was damn mad that it upset my horses. But then, the horses got used to them
too, and they became indifferent! [laughter] Well, they came so often, twice a week -
"it's Wednesday, the planes will be here!"
A: More... continue probing...
Q: (P) The planes came from East to West, and in the West was the mountain...
A: Catoctin.
Q: (P) That is the name of the mountain. (L) What is it? (P) The tunnel where all these
facilities were... under Catoctin Mountain. Camp David is near, too.
A: And MUCH ELSE! Mount Weather, Virginia. And why did you live in area...
Q: (P) Is it because of Fort Deitrich?
A: What brought you to Maryland?
Q: (P) Fort Deitrich. (L) What does Mount Weather mean? (P) The underground
tunnel - everybody in town called it The Tunnel - but there was nothing around there
to ever give anybody the slightest clue as to what it was. In fact, I lived there for quite
a long time before I knew it existed. And, on top of the mountain there was a weather
station... (L) But, what about Fort Deitrich? (P) V***c was doing electron
microscopy - cancer research.
Q: (P) It was a photographic lab. (L) Do the instruments on top of the mountain have
anything to do with these planes?
A: So what?
Q: (L) Does it have anything to do with those antennae that are reported as being
connected to that project, that alter space/time?
A: Helicopters, Pat? We are asking you!
Q: (P) Well, the helicopters in Frankerick went over our house every time the
president was at Camp David. But, that was our house in Walkersville not in
Emmetsburg. When we first moved to Maryland. Sometimes the helicopters were
A: You see, P is resistant due to experiences, things don't "phase" her easily,
programming, etc.
Q: (L) So, all of these things happening around her, the planes, the mountain, the
helicopters... (P) But the helicopters, I knew it was the President either going to or
coming from Camp David.
A: Resistant, not resisting.
Q: (L) Is the term "resistant" a clue?
A: All is a clue here!
Q: (L) Since P has only been abducted 4 times, can this mean that she is resistant to
A: No.
Q: (P) Isn't that just my personality, that if it doesn't affect me I don't bother with it?
A: Yes.
Q: (P) I don't get bothered about things that...
A: Shoot somebody in front of P, and she says: "Oh well, that's life" so, to discover
spectacular things, one must be patient and probe carefully, no hasty assumptions,
please!! There is to be retrieved, revealed, and studied.
Q: (P) Well, the helicopters went back and forth to Camp David. The President was
supposed to be in them and his entourage. There were only 3 helicopters. (L) Are
these the helicopters referred to?
A: No. Let P digest it, and report back later.
Q: (L) At the time we had all those sightings around here on the night we did that
session with P, why did so many other people see them?
A: Window was "blast."
Q: (L) Are there any craft over us at this time?
A: ?
Q: (L) Okay, we have the magazine ready to go out and the articles are somewhat
controversial. Can we have an indication as to whether there will be a positive
response to this issue or not?
A: Wait and see.
Q: (L) Will it be possible to "channel" online as Mike Lindemann has suggested?
A: Sure!
Q: (L) P is having some serious problems at the present time, can you help her with
A: Networking works!!!
Q: (P) Is there a light at the end of the tunnel?
A: Networking works!!!!!
Q: (L) So, if she becomes involved in a network of some sort, things will sort out for
A: What do you think networking is, Laura?
Q: (L) Well, just what we have been doing... (P) How can you network a federal
A: Share ideas; ask others for their experiences and opinions.
Q: (L) Pat says her shop cannot support the salaries for three people. And her
Federal transcription business has gone kaput since the budget ran out and congress
has not passed a new one.
A: What harm is there in aggressively pursuing government contracts, what have you
to lose? Even if it fails dramatically, what, then, have you lost? If someone has the
capacity to do so in business, the ultimate advice is to diversify, not eliminate, in other
words, "leave no stone unturned!!" Suggest chase state and local government work as
a buffer. Networking works P, you have always solved dilemmas, you go into
"automatic pilot" during crises, so why do you ask?
Q: (L) Can you give us a clue about when the budget battle is going to end?
A: It is in the process of ending. Monday will start to refire the machine, though it will
be awhile before it runs at full steam again. Backlogs create opportunity.
Q: (P) But, the backlogs can't begin until the budget is passed and signed.
A: Will happen in quick succession. You need to concentrate on straightening your
personal situation.
Q: (P) What does that mean? (L) It means that until you can do something else,
concentrate on that.
A: Mercury retrograde favors continuances, not beginnings.
Q: (P) I would like to know about the apparitions of the Virgin Mary at Conyers,
GA, as well as this book "Mary's Message to the World" and all the other messages
about the End Times that are coming out all over?
A: The forces at work here are far too clever to be accurately anticipated so easily.
You never know what twists and turns will follow, and they are aware of prophetic
and philosophical patterning and usually shift course to fool and discourage those who
believe in fixed futures.
Q: (L) (L) Anything further for tonight?
A: Goodbye.
Thanks to everyone for the session. :jawdrop:

Really sorry to read that and that all of you went through that.

What a nightmare !

I am sending to all of you lots of hugs. :flowers:
Good to know that you managed to go through all those attacks without any "scars".

Btw, if I remember well psycopathy was introduced by the lizzies after their new "Nazi Master Race" plan failed. My question is, was psycopathy already present before or did the Lizzies time travel and introduced psycopaths after their Aryan agenda failed? Also, it's quite surprising that the lowlands percentage of psycopaths has decreased since the 18th century considering that the lizzies have been trying to increase their number.
Laura said:
As I have already mentioned in a couple of places on the forum, we had a recent session and it was one of the most disturbing sessions with the Cs we've ever had. It was conducted last Monday night and was transcribed by Mr. Scott the next day. At first I thought "well, that should never see the light of day" even though the Cs said, yeah, it needed to be published as a lesson to others. But now, with a number of discussions about relationships going on, I think I had better follow the Cs advice though this one is going to require background information that I am going to try to make as brief as possible.

The main topic of this session is the recent visit for EE Teacher Training of a certain couple and their 15 month old child. Their names have been changed for privacy though.

Now, you may well ask how anybody got me to bend the rules about no small children in this house? Over the years it has been said repeatedly that the Chateau is not a place for young children, there are too many important things happening, everyone is busy, too much breakable equipment and decoration, and baby proofing is virtually impossible. In fact, it was just recently mentioned again to another family when they were hoping to come for the EE training that they needed to leave their young child at home or make arrangements to stay in a B&B and bring a baby-sitter.

The rules were bent by me because the baby is young enough that my daughters could (and wanted to) watch and play with him while the parents were busy. It didn’t turn out that way and it is really too bad that the parents did not let us know in advance just how things were. I was, of course, expecting a toddler; I was not expecting a child the presents as this one did. The rules were bent because I was trying to be externally considerate of the man who, I realized, wanted very much to help his wife to feel a part of the group and she was very suspicious and critical from the start.

A couple people on the forum noticed that I was up at 3:30 a.m. last night/this morning; the reason is I spent a rather sleepless night agonizing over what I am going to publish here.

I know how hard it was for you to post this, Laura. You are always considering the feelings and effects it may have on those involved and you do everything you can to protect.

In this case though, by posting the session it provides protection for a lot more people because it provides knowledge even if it is a disturbing thing to learn. I thank you for once again taking on the burden and hope whatever little I manage to do in my own work and lessons helps you and the goals of the group.

Sheesh! Relationships in this reality are hard enough without the choice of shedding illusions so we can live according to objective reality.When one decides work toward being objective and of service, it requires even more work in being diligent about what we do and who we choose to get involved with.

As Laura stated a number of times, a relationship should help to advance the goal, to help each other move forward when weariness sets in as it sometimes will.

Personally, I couldn't be in an intimate relationship with someone who is so suspicious about the work that the group has to keep going out of their way to make exceptions. It would be placing more burden on a group that is a very important part of my life.

I will say though that it is easy to be under the illusion that our individual choices advance the group aim. Sometimes it's just plain lack of knowledge and a little nudging is needed. I'd say based on the session a lot of nudging to help both involved had been going on for a while.

I am thankful there is a network that can see and is open enough to discuss these things.

This is really a sad situation for Sue, Bob the baby and all who want nothing but the best for them.

Thank you for sharing this session Laura--what at nightmare!--the "Houseguests from Hell" and other strange events is a disturbing read. There are indeed many things to think about here. One that is on top for me is hearing that someone who has been a member for so long, QFS and everything, and now so deeply involved with FOTCM can still be running a program that had him seeking out a mate on line, and then marrying her all without looking for any feedback from the network. And then, he appears to have his emotions hijacked to the point where he can't see obvious rudeness expressed to people he cares about by his "beloved" among other problem behaviors of hers, that his child has serious developmental problems, and that he is behaving in a detached, shutdown manner--it's frightening. Having been in "Bob's" place somewhat, having the life-energy and your identity sucked out of you by a dangerous, controlling manipulating spouse, I wonder when anyone can be healed enough and evolved enough and knowledgeable enough to avoid this trap again in our lives? Wow. That Sue is also seems to be a victim here is really depressing and that she being used so horribly to spy and who knows what else is horrifying to me. The saying "We don't know what we don't know" comes to mind.

obviously, being strong willed doesn't mean that you can't be gotten to through your emotions. Oh, yeah. That’s why Sue...

A: Exactly. It should be a lesson to many; it is also a tale as old as time.

Bob's experience with Sue is another example of why at this point in my life starting a new relationship is nonexistent on my agenda. I have many wonderful friends, and put my focus on developing a relationship with "myself in the future"-- if I am out there! :)

That we need to maintain constant vigilance in our daily lives, continue to put ourselves in the position to receive feedback and mirroring from the forums, and then be willing to hear what others are telling us, are the initial messages I am getting from this session. Thank you again Laura for sharing this with us. I hope you all can take a break from house-guests for a little bit--constant outsiders, no matter how well liked can still take a lot of energy. Take care all.
Wow that all was pretty weird.

I'm glad it wasn't as worse as it could have been and that you all are okay. I hope you will recover soon as well Laura, from the fall.

It's really strange, all of that. Bob has been on the forum and in QFS for a long time I'm assuming, but yet has ''trapped'' himself in such a situation.
Does knowledge protects or only application of knowledge? I guess both and also that vigilance and networking are as important.
But I assume that a quiet guy like him, as he appeared, might have had problems sharing for example that he was looking for another on a dating site. Maybe if he would have, he wouldn't be going through it. Never know though.

I see that both Bob and Sue are pretty much hooked on each other. Almost as if it is ''fixed'' there.

Q: (L) But obviously, being strong willed doesn't mean that you can't be gotten to through your emotions. Oh, yeah. That’s why Sue...

A: Exactly. It should be a lesson to many; it is also a tale as old as time.

Very very important I think...

Thank you all who attended and for posting!
What terrible and frightening moments you lived all (usually breaking objects are clues but when it comes to health, that's strong no?). Hope everyone recovering fast.

My impression is that Sue (being unconsciously used as anybody could be as 4thD STS interference) has been bad through getting upset and everything, while she could have just played perfectly a role.

Maybe this is a sign of an internal conflict between her inner essence and the program put into her? Or maybe the goal was just to act as to take Bob away from the group? The other possibility is that they lost control on her while she was in the house so that she needed (unconsciously) to get out from time to time to recharge energy/programs?

Does it make sense? I mean, something went offtrack or was it what it was intended?
Thanks to all of you for describing the atmosphere in the house through your experiences. I felt tense just reading it. I realised all my muscles were tensing up as I got further through the posts! And well done for showing the patience it must have taken from you all! I wonder how things would have been if you so many of you had not all been laid so low by the bug, it seems like she took advantage of your weakened energy and tried to make it worse through her bad behaviour.

The session is fascinating too. I'm gonna re-read it straight away.

Wishing you all well

Thank you for publishing this session, and especially for all the extra work in providing such a comprehensive background story to put it in context. I think it is a very important story in many ways. Among other things it shows quite clearly how the 'original sin' of desire (the fall) which got us into this mess in the first place still thrives. The whole piece serves as a potent reminder and warning, so thanks again.
It seems to me that this was an incredibly difficult session to release to the public. No matter how much I learn about 'the Consortium', their cruelty continues to floor me - it is unfathomable to me. I cannot grasp the limitless capacity for cruelty. Human existence is, by and large, mechanical and we are all subject to manipulations every day in millions of different ways, but there is something decidedly cruel about using 'love' to derail a person, or two people, and, then, the baby - what a heartbreaking situation.

Thank you for sharing this session, the lessons are painful, but crucial if we are to navigate these increasingly dangerous waters. We cannot, not one of us, do this alone and networking is our only hope. Without networking, we are lost. I hope Bob and Sue can receive this information in the spirit in which it is offered and that it benefits all.
Anart said:
Thank you for sharing this session, the lessons are painful, but crucial if we are to navigate these increasingly dangerous waters. We cannot, not one of us, do this alone and networking is our only hope. Without networking, we are lost. I hope Bob and Sue can receive this information in the spirit in which it is offered and that it benefits all.


Hard for most persons not to be concerned while reading about Sue's selfish behavior and Bob's cluelessness about how his personal situation is negatively affecting himself and those around him. As the C's pointed out in the session "it's a tale old as time." Hopefully, Bob and Sue will attain some maturity and perspicacity in this life to realize that they've been played. Then again, it's up to them to discover the truth and take on some responsibility for their actions, rather than casting blame on others for "not being nice".
anart said:
It seems to me that this was an incredibly difficult session to release to the public. No matter how much I learn about 'the Consortium', their cruelty continues to floor me - it is unfathomable to me. I cannot grasp the limitless capacity for cruelty. Human existence is, by and large, mechanical and we are all subject to manipulations every day in millions of different ways, but there is something decidedly cruel about using 'love' to derail a person, or two people, and, then, the baby - what a heartbreaking situation.

Yes, the cruelty of the consortium is almost unimaginable, and it is so that no matter how much we learn, there is always more and more ugliness still to discover. We are seeing once again the face of evil, and it is so monstrous that words can't even convey just how very terrible it is.

I thank Laura for standing in the face of this evil and bearing the burden, which seems to always be increasing.

Thank you for publishing this, although it must have been just awful and painful to do, learning is the only way we can fight this evil.
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