Strong Emotional Reactions While Reading - What Does it Mean?

Andrew

Jedi Master
Hello Everyone,

Lately when I’ve been reading, despite subject matter, or even reflecting on a topic, I’ve been having some fairly prominent Emotional Reactions. Reading seems to have taken a different level for me to some degree. Perhaps a more conscious understanding of what it is I’m actually reading?

I’m not sure.

And don’t really understand why this is happening.

I can be reading a section a sentence or just a few words, and something about it will just hit me with a wave of emotions and I begin to cry.

I’ve also noticed a physiological response connected to these emotional reactions I seem to keep having. My breathing intensifies, my hands start to tingle and will escalate to a point to where I have to stand up and shake my hands out because they start to go numb from the intensity.

I would like to know if any one has gone through this or may know why this is happening?

I know Laura speaks of a similar emotional experience in The Wave, but I would hate to speculate that my experience is anywhere near related.

Thank you everyone for any feedback
 
Hey Andrew, I think that is a very common experience here. After all that’s what the reading topics are for: to help us see our machine and past in new and different ways, which in a way changes us by growing our awareness. I think it’s good you’re developing an awareness of emotions in your body— noticing your heart rate and energy mobilization in your limbs, intense feelings, and so on. What book(s) are you reading that draw those responses from you? I’ve recalled many times reading the books on Narcissism and Criminality where an anecdote would hit me like a ton of bricks because it would cause a reaction or remind me of some painful past memory. Do any specific memories come to you? Maybe it would be beneficial to keep a journal record of what kind of content provoked those emotions and see if there’s some pattern going on. Just remember to go at your own pace and not induce any more stress than you are capable of discharging through eiriu eolas, yoga, meditation, exercise or some other form of de-stress or relaxation.
 
I agree with whitecoast. It has happened to me too, and still does depending on the material.

Sometimes I think it may by linked to past lives. Others, to just making a connection that is deep within, perhaps not yet fully verbalized, but some big "Aha moments", when things make a little more sense. In other cases, if could be that the words you are reading make you go back to a specific point in time where there were unprocessed emotions. And other times, it's simply that understanding something more consciously is a big thing inside, if that makes sense.

I think it will depend on the material, but also on your general state. Since you are saying that it happens regardless of the material, is it possible that you are also physically vulnerable, for example, or more stressed? Whitecoast's idea of a journal could help, I think. Perhaps there is something else needing to come out, or to be processed.

Added: Also, this could be exacerbated by what you are going through as described in this other thread. It involves a lot of stress and frustration, the need to speak up, which is not always easy, etc.
 
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Apart what the others had said, we can see the power of words on a page, that are incredible. They can make us laugh, they can make us cry. They give us insights that are strong like a tree. It happens sometimes when I read, some sentences make me stop to breath, it happens, or make me feel things that are there but I have forgotten. I wish you are ok! :hug2:
 
I think it’s good you’re developing an awareness of emotions in your body— noticing your heart rate and energy mobilization in your limbs, intense feelings, and so on.

Thank you WhiteCoast for bringing this to attention; Something simple, yet not considered. Emotional detachment (from almost everything) has been a common way of my functioning for a while. This is somewhat of a new experience. I've had similar experiences (waves of emotion) happen in the past, when watching movies/documentaries about WW2.

Until now, I’ve ever given it conscious consideration or any weight of importance.

What book(s) are you reading that draw those responses from you?

It started with Sniper on the Eastern Front by Albrecht Wacker.

Then:
  • The Psychology of Mans Possible Evolution
  • Inside the Criminal Mind
  • The Leader in You by Dale Carnegie
  • And The Quick & Easy Way to Effective Speaking By Dale Carnegie
From Chu’s Response here, (Thank you Chu)

Since you are saying that it happens regardless of the material, is it possible that you are also physically vulnerable, for example, or more stressed?

And

Added: Also, this could be exacerbated by what you are going through as described in this other thread. It involves a lot of stress and frustration, the need to speak up, which is not always easy, etc.

It seems to be clear that the Last two books on that list are directly related to the thread Chu referenced. In that instance, it does seem to have been exacerbated by what is currently going on in my life.

I've always had a quiet voice & have never really spoken up. What I spoke of in that thread is really putting that to the test and causing a lot of stress indeed.

Thank you for helping me see that Chu.

Maybe it would be beneficial to keep a journal record of what kind of content provoked those emotions and see if there’s some pattern going on.

WhiteCoast, I’ve taken this into consideration and started one. I’ve gone back to the last book that I can accurately recall an emotional response surged from and referenced the paragraph and page. Will be interesting to see what comes of this.

Just remember to go at your own pace and not induce any more stress than you are capable of discharging through eiriu eolas, yoga, meditation, exercise or some other form of de-stress or relaxation.

Thank you. I’m trying to get into the consistent Habit of practicing EE. But to be completely transparent, the program scares me. It scares me of what is going to come out and what I’m going to have to face. I’m having a hard time getting over it.

Sometimes I think it may by linked to past lives.

I’ve always had this suspicion. Especially since I have these same emotional responses to WW2; Specifically from the German & American sides of the war. But with no way to know, I try not to speculate.

Others, to just making a connection that is deep within, perhaps not yet fully verbalized, but some big "Aha moments", when things make a little more sense.

Yes, I agree. It took me by surprise since, even when having “Aha moments” in the past, they were never followed by an experience like this.

Apart what the others had said, we can see the power of words on a page, that are incredible. They can make us laugh, they can make us cry. They give us insights that are strong like a tree. It happens sometimes when I read, some sentences make me stop to breath, it happens, or make me feel things that are there but I have forgotten. I wish you are ok! :hug2:

Thank you Loreta! :hug2:
 
Andrew, regarding EE and your apprehension of doing it because of what you fear it may bring up. Just do the program without the Beatha (Ba-Ha) portion. The Beatha can bring up a lot of emotions quickly. The pipe breathing is more gentle and slower in bring up those repressed emotions. Pipe breathing can also calm you down if you are feeling overwhelmed for whatever reason.

Also, listening, or saying, the Prayer of the Soul before going to sleep is recommended as it can help you in many ways.

When, and if, you go back to doing the Beatha, remember, breathe gently. Don't do forced or hard breathing while doing the Beatha. All that needs to be done is to make sure that you are constantly breathing in or out - gently. :hug:
 
Thanks Andrew,
It happenned more and more to me these last months, particularly when I saw a psychologist to talk and realease some emotions.

Reading a book may give really wonderful feeling of joy (ex : beginning to read Collingwood's Idea of History and feeling I get it with a mosaic view what he's trying to convey) or hit some hard "truth" (ex : reading the masquerade of angels by Karla Turner discussing the discuting practice the Reptilian do on children).

It's so overwhelming I stopped building an independant life for fears of "the exterior" and I stopped reading because I need to release emotional stuffs. I had overwhelming feeling of guilt building through my belly at times, and sometimes when I want to open my chest by just breathing I start tingling and fearing inside, like I want to go off my chest while fearing to die from it. For my case it is good to be accompanied by a professional for releasing this burden and to going slow.

Hope it helps.
 
Hello Everyone,

Lately when I’ve been reading, despite subject matter, or even reflecting on a topic, I’ve been having some fairly prominent Emotional Reactions. Reading seems to have taken a different level for me to some degree. Perhaps a more conscious understanding of what it is I’m actually reading?

I’m not sure.

And don’t really understand why this is happening.

I can be reading a section a sentence or just a few words, and something about it will just hit me with a wave of emotions and I begin to cry.

I’ve also noticed a physiological response connected to these emotional reactions I seem to keep having. My breathing intensifies, my hands start to tingle and will escalate to a point to where I have to stand up and shake my hands out because they start to go numb from the intensity.

I would like to know if any one has gone through this or may know why this is happening?

I know Laura speaks of a similar emotional experience in The Wave, but I would hate to speculate that my experience is anywhere near related.

Thank you everyone for any feedback

I can only relate to my own experiences but I would say - your subconscious "is identifying" with vibrations and symbolism in the words your reading. Attached to that - is emotions on the conscious level - in a form "of knowing" or what some refer to as "Deja vu".

Remember, we carry DNA from Past and Future lives that has gone through a transition "cup of forgetfulness" when we're reborn in the flesh. We're not aware of where we are on "the learning curve" and the emotions triggered might be "a remembering" from a different time and place (past - future life) from one or several lessons, that we were given the task to complete in this life time.

The emotions are "a trigger to self" to pay attention - to what you are experiencing, giving you an opportunity to contemplate or focus what reactions you are experiencing and why. Dreams may often accompany these feelings, giving you additional clues to explain your immediate reactions. In a sense, it's a natural process of "inner work" and processing.

I see it - as a good sign and that you are on a path of further development "of inner self." Practicing EE can help excelerate the process but pace yourself - so you don't become overwhelmed with emotion and have a hard time processing it - all at once. Everything in moderation is best.

Chu makes a valid point - that you might be at "a specific point in time where there were unprocessed emotions" that might be part of an unfinished lesson and your immediate environment and mind set are conductive in working through the emotional part of this lesson and assimilating the experience, in the coding of your DNA.

Sometimes I think it may by linked to past lives. Others, to just making a connection that is deep within, perhaps not yet fully verbalized, but some big "Aha moments", when things make a little more sense. In other cases, if could be that the words you are reading make you go back to a specific point in time where there were unprocessed emotions

And other times, it's simply that understanding something more consciously is a big thing inside, if that makes sense.
 
I've always had a quiet voice & have never really spoken up. What I spoke of in that thread is really putting that to the test and causing a lot of stress indeed.

I imagine so! It's not an easy situation. From the outside, both things you shared seemed connected. Other people say things (books, articles), and you get a strong emotion. Your thoughts (but not voicing them) generates a strong emotion. And being scared of what may "come out" with EE, as if afraid of expressing things that are long burried, and preferring to keep things inside. I think perhaps your subconscious is telling you that it IS time to speak up, to have a voice of your own. It can be very liberating. Not that you'll go out and tell everybody they are wrong and as a result get fired, but just finding a balance may help. At least being able to be honest with yourself, while strategic with others, and standing your ground. My 2 cents.
 
Hey Everyone,

I want to apologize to Nienna, Nico, angelburst29 and Chu for not even acknowledging their responses to me. You all took the time out of your day to give me feedback and I didn’t even have the decency to thank you or respond and for this I’m very sorry.

It’s not an excuse, but I just wanted to express that I always seem to run away from the forum. :-(

Andrew, regarding EE and your apprehension of doing it because of what you fear it may bring up. Just do the program without the Beatha (Ba-Ha) portion. The Beatha can bring up a lot of emotions quickly. The pipe breathing is more gentle and slower in bring up those repressed emotions. Pipe breathing can also calm you down if you are feeling overwhelmed for whatever reason.

Also, listening, or saying, the Prayer of the Soul before going to sleep is recommended as it can help you in many ways.

When, and if, you go back to doing the Beatha, remember, breathe gently. Don't do forced or hard breathing while doing the Beatha. All that needs to be done is to make sure that you are constantly breathing in or out - gently.

Thank you Nienna. And thank you for the reminder to not force my breathing. That is actually exactly what I would do and it quickly became quite discomforting; lots of intense tingling sensations in my face and other areas of my body, etc.

I also wanted to note, even with just the Pipe Breathing and Prayer of the Soul....I feel like there's an Emotional Dam just waiting to explode; I keep tip-toeing around this, hoping I won’t have to process this tidal wave of emotion, but it’s becoming more clear this just isn’t going to be possible if I truly want to be a better version of myself.

Thanks Andrew,

It happened more and more to me these last months, particularly when I saw a psychologist to talk and release some emotions.

Reading a book may give really wonderful feeling of joy (ex : beginning to read Collingwood's Idea of History and feeling I get it with a mosaic view what he's trying to convey) or hit some hard "truth" (ex : reading the masquerade of angels by Karla Turner discussing the discuting practice the Reptilian do on children).

It's so overwhelming I stopped building an independent life for fears of "the exterior" and I stopped reading because I need to release emotional stuffs. I had overwhelming feeling of guilt building through my belly at times, and sometimes when I want to open my chest by just breathing I start tingling and fearing inside, like I want to go off my chest while fearing to die from it. For my case it is good to be accompanied by a professional for releasing this burden and to going slow.

Hope it helps.

Thank you Nico. I can heavily relate to the bolded section. I recently finished Book 8 of the Wave and…this reality is just…too much at times. I feel incredibly overwhelmed with the insanity of this world, the hyper-dimensional influence/control of it all, and experience some of the same physiological reactions as you mentioned above. I just can’t help but break down and cry sometimes. And this emotional release keeps reminding me that I have so much more to let go of.

I was also considering looking at speaking with a professional (someone specializing in NARM) but the nearest practitioner is in Los Angeles which isn’t very far from me (2 hours or so), but I have serious Anxiety related to driving in heavy traffic from some Traumatizing auto accidents. So I’m not sure what I’m going to do there yet.

The emotions are "a trigger to self" to pay attention - to what you are experiencing, giving you an opportunity to contemplate or focus what reactions you are experiencing and why. Dreams may often accompany these feelings, giving you additional clues to explain your immediate reactions. In a sense, it's a natural process of "inner work" and processing.

I see it - as a good sign and that you are on a path of further development "of inner self." Practicing EE can help accelerate the process but pace yourself - so you don't become overwhelmed with emotion and have a hard time processing it - all at once. Everything in moderation is best.

Chu makes a valid point - that you might be at "a specific point in time where there were unprocessed emotions" that might be part of an unfinished lesson and your immediate environment and mind set are conductive in working through the emotional part of this lesson and assimilating the experience, in the coding of your DNA.

Thank you angelburst. Greatly appreciate your feedback here. I’m trying not to become overwhelmed by them, it’s incredibly difficult. I hope I can get through it and make it to the other side. I would like so much to be free from this suffering.

I imagine so! It's not an easy situation. From the outside, both things you shared seemed connected. Other people say things (books, articles), and you get a strong emotion. Your thoughts (but not voicing them) generates a strong emotion. And being scared of what may "come out" with EE, as if afraid of expressing things that are long burried, and preferring to keep things inside. I think perhaps your subconscious is telling you that it IS time to speak up, to have a voice of your own. It can be very liberating.

Thank you Chu. Yes. I’ve always preferred to keep things inside. My upbringing was wrought with my father always verbally laying into me when I couldn’t meet his standards or expectations. The adaptive solution was to just shut down and hold it all in. I have a really hard time with this program controlling me.
 
Thank you Chu. Yes. I’ve always preferred to keep things inside. My upbringing was wrought with my father always verbally laying into me when I couldn’t meet his standards or expectations. The adaptive solution was to just shut down and hold it all in. I have a really hard time with this program controlling me.

I can easily identify with this set of circumstances. Only difference, it was my Mother. You have actually brought to the surface, a vital identifying element of information, from early childhood, that can be used as a tool to work with. Your relationship with your Father, his behavior and expectations, along with your own reactions, may be the core nucleus and main source of the emotional turmoil and manifest physical reactions - you are experiencing now?

As children, our World tends to be limited to black and white thinking. We're new at this game of life and we depend heavily on our Parent's or Caregivers, as a form of protection and guiding force. We generally take their instructions - seriously because we intuitively sense, they are our security. "So, we try to please and do - as told." In our young mind, we think "we are doing right" the way we were told or what we sense in our limited World is expected of us and when we suddenly experience negative feedback from an adult - our emotional response is - deep hurt and confusion. Depending on the circumstances and duration or a repeated pattern, the hurt can eventually turn into hurt and resentment - which can manifest into "a form of repressed anger" because we're unable to outwardly express our feelings, for one reason or another. Sometimes, there's a certain fear, that if "we speak out" and voice our opinion, we will only make matters worse for ourselves, so the repressed anger takes on shades of fear, further compromising our situation and we bury it deep within.

I can be reading a section a sentence or just a few words, and something about it will just hit me with a wave of emotions and I begin to cry.

I sense, the waves of emotions might be repressed anger and hurt ... and some subconscious element triggered the response?

I’ve also noticed a physiological response connected to these emotional reactions I seem to keep having. My breathing intensifies, my hands start to tingle and will escalate to a point to where I have to stand up and shake my hands out because they start to go numb from the intensity.

This might sound counter productive but your physiological response, although alarming, might be your bodies way of releasing bottled up inner tension - like a release valve? In this case - that reaction can be "a good thing" for over all emotional and physical health. Your age and hormones might be playing a vital function here, in getting rid of excess accumulated tension?

I think, if you took a few minutes and searched back in your mind, you might be able to identify moments when you were younger, when you experienced similar symptoms - of the hands tingling and an increase in heavy breathing when you were under extreme pressure ... and then buried your emotions?

It may also help to look back and review your Father's background and how it might have reflected on his treatment of you. He might have been running "a generational program" - acting out the way his father had treated him?

Both my Parent's were brought up in strict households. There was a list of do's and don'ts. Children were "seen but not heard" and their hands were kept busy - so they didn't have idle time - to get in trouble. My father was "head of household" and had final say in anything, etc. They were acting out a custom that had been past down through the generations. So, when you're dealing with Family, it helps to take in consideration - their backgrounds and possible motives, when trying to solve a problem.

When I was young, I learned to write everything down - exactly the way my Mother instructed me because she would complain, I wasn't listening when she told me to do something or the way she wanted it done. So, I would write down her exact words and follow her instructions - to the letter. According to her, I still wasn't doing what she asked! By the time I reached 10, I was a basket case. It would be many years later, I would discover "she didn't have enough marbles to work with"! That realization alone - RELEASED a lot of inner turmoil and stress. I no longer had to blame myself - for not meeting up to her expectations. As for the habit of writing down instructions - word for word - it became a handy tool when I entered the workforce. So, when you're trying to solve a problem, also take in consideration, the mental stability of the people you are dealing with.
 
I think it's useful to notice it in a "oh yeah my body does this because I've managed to access bound up energy" kind of way, and instead of getting swept up in the turmoil, develop a sort of "Okay I'll pause what I'm doing for a moment here and let this play out" familiarity with it. Dealing with it gracefully as a normal occurrence rather than panicking or worrying about it getting in your way will probably help the spurious energy get resolved.
 
During the 2 years period doing every day EE. i had strong emotional reactions.I was kind ready for that due to the research i did regardless to EE Program.I understood it was a deep cleansed of terribly memories hide somewhere in our
subconsciousness.Us Chu and others i still have this reactions.Some of them can be active just by reading a book,watching some documentary,when i hear children crying or somebody been cruel with other one.But this emotional reactions also can be of tremendous joy and happiness specially when i see "simple" interactions between children,walking into the woods or just watching how the snow fall...Anyway i hope this experience can help Andrew and thank you very much for sharing yours.:hug2:
 
You have actually brought to the surface, a vital identifying element of information, from early childhood, that can be used as a tool to work with. Your relationship with your Father, his behavior and expectations, along with your own reactions, may be the core nucleus and main source of the emotional turmoil and manifest physical reactions - you are experiencing now?

It's hard to say. There's definitely a large portion I can attribute to him, but other factors as well; their initial divorce, possible mild sexual abuse, neglectful caregivers and some 'high strangeness' type experiences. I really don't know. A lot of my childhood is a big blur; probably for good reason. Not sure I want to go digging around there if it's not needed. :-[

We're new at this game of life and we depend heavily on our Parent's or Caregivers, as a form of protection and guiding force. We generally take their instructions - seriously because we intuitively sense, they are our security. "So, we try to please and do - as told." In our young mind, we think "we are doing right" the way we were told or what we sense in our limited World is expected of us and when we suddenly experience negative feedback from an adult - our emotional response is - deep hurt and confusion.

Exactly!

Depending on the circumstances and duration or a repeated pattern, the hurt can eventually turn into hurt and resentment - which can manifest into "a form of repressed anger" because we're unable to outwardly express our feelings, for one reason or another.

Been holding on to this for YEARS. I just want to let it go now. Sincerely hoping EE can help me clear this away.

Sometimes, there's a certain fear, that if "we speak out" and voice our opinion, we will only make matters worse for ourselves, so the repressed anger takes on shades of fear, further compromising our situation and we bury it deep within.

Exactly. Fear of embarrassment, humiliation, belittlement. So I just learned to keep my mouth shut around him and (because of those experiences) everyone else too, which has severely hampered my ability to connect with others.

I sense, the waves of emotions might be repressed anger and hurt ... and some subconscious element triggered the response?

Some instances yes definitely. Others, seem to be related to something ‘more’. Like, awakening to something ‘more’ and the humility of the realization it creates. I’m not sure how to verbalize it. For instance, I just got back from Loews to get a key made for our office, and as I was standing there in front of the Woman helping me, this wave of emotion started to hit me and I almost started to tear up right in front of her. While she was helping me I was just considering her and her being. Then considering humanity and what we are all subject to yet oblivious of; It’s just so heartbreaking - this reality.

I think, if you took a few minutes and searched back in your mind, you might be able to identify moments when you were younger, when you experienced similar symptoms - of the hands tingling and an increase in heavy breathing when you were under extreme pressure ... and then buried your emotions?

It may also help to look back and review your Father's background and how it might have reflected on his treatment of you. He might have been running "a generational program" - acting out the way his father had treated him?

I have no doubt he’s running a program(s) as you described. It wasn’t until later in my life that I learned my seemingly innocent and loving grandfather was quite a tyrant to my father and his siblings. Something I always seem to fail to consider. As if my own hurt and pain is the only one that matters. :rolleyes:

I’m quite afraid to go searching into the depths of my mind out of fear of re-traumatizing myself. I’ve had some weird things happen to me that I never wish to relive or even ever have to think about again. I just want to be able to move forward without those things holding me back. The NeurOptimal training (while I had it) was quite relieving. So I’m hoping to be able to acquire another one of those and in conjunction with my Diet and doing EE - to clear away this emotional poison.


It would be many years later, I would discover "she didn't have enough marbles to work with"! That realization alone - RELEASED a lot of inner turmoil and stress. I no longer had to blame myself - for not meeting up to her expectations.

Ya, I definitely still have issues with this. Even though I consciously KNOW these things from my parents perspectives and their own upbringing, my body is just triggered to react as if it's being attacked which spikes my Anxiety. This doesn't happen as often as it used to so hopefully progress has been made there. I am becoming more aware of my behavior when these situations do occur, and learning to re-focus my attention Externally rather than Internally. Incredible what a change in perspective can do.


I think it's useful to notice it in a "oh yeah my body does this because I've managed to access bound up energy" kind of way, and instead of getting swept up in the turmoil, develop a sort of "Okay I'll pause what I'm doing for a moment here and let this play out" familiarity with it. Dealing with it gracefully as a normal occurrence rather than panicking or worrying about it getting in your way will probably help the spurious energy get resolved.

Yes! I always seemed to get swept up in the turmoil (internal considering). Thankfully, this seems to be lessening. Thank you for the reminders!

But this emotional reactions also can be of tremendous joy and happiness specially when i see "simple" interactions between children,walking into the woods or just watching how the snow fall...Anyway i hope this experience can help Andrew and thank you very much for sharing yours.:hug2:

I think I’m becoming more sensitive to what you described above as well. Doesn’t happen as much as I would like it to, but it’s not the overly negative lens I've been conditioned to view the world/myself/others through for so many years. It’s quite a relief to even be able to feel some semblance of joy.

Thank you munaychasumag! :hug2:
 
A lot of my childhood is a big blur; probably for good reason. Not sure I want to go digging around there if it's not needed. :-[

Quite possibly it would not be productive. I've spent countless hours running through memories over and over in my head, and I very rarely gain any additional insights to justify the suffering unless I have gained some real knowledge. I don't mean just one or two insights gained from a book, more like a whole new overview. If something has happened between now and the last time such that at every step, the way I see things has changed, then there is a chance I could come to a new realization. And in that case chances are that it will happen on it's own organically if you just give it time. But you need to take an active role in the present so you don't live mechanically, as this kind of development doesn't happen mechanically.

When we hear "do not hide things or suppress things in yourself" we tend to think "Oh I need to spend all my energy to resolve this thing that happened 15 years ago that I have never gotten over". In reality the thing that happened 15 years ago probably doesn't matter much except when it comes up, whereas the decisions you make every moment in the present are what are creating your current condition and resolving the immediate everyday nuts and bolts issues will often lead unexpectedly to resolving issues in the past. Not only that but the main ways the past event affects you are probably not at times you KNOW about it.

So it's not good to have expectations about the the way you might go about resolving a trauma. Focus on working with the present and making the present better. If you're avoiding something you don't necessarily need to go down the rabbit hole analyzing old memories thinking that this will somehow give you the motivation to get something done. I often find I need to do that by doing other things in the present. For instance a new mattress so you can sleep properly. Or stop making things unnecessarily hard for yourself by imposing restrictions. For instance, I never wore gloves for mechanical work because my hands are size small. So I broke down and got the pink women's mechanical gloves which fit me perfectly. It's surprising how much this helped with motivation as I no longer had to fear my hands hurting and covered with cuts. Also I got an expensive reading chair, which seemed pretentious at the time but as it turns out the more comfortable you are when reading the better you can focus. Find ways to make things easier for yourself, rather than making unnecessary restrictions. Then you can do the really hard things because you've made everything else easy.

Perhaps more simply, be aware of what is hurting you in the present. What makes you uncomfortable, what makes you tired, what drains your energy. The car may be dying, the kitchen drain is plugged, house is dirty, shower needs cleaned etc. but for some reason it's this thing that happened years ago that gets all the blame for making life miserable. A lot of people don't seem to realize that if you fix the car, clean the drain, clean the house, and clean the shower you will feel a whole lot better!
 
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