O.K. gonna attempt to elaborate further then. The dream is something I call going beyond black. Made attempts previously, several times to share it. It might not make sense and may take a few attempts to give a good description. The dream has left me since puberty. About 3 decades ago. Trying for narration:
First, some background. Nearly every time I've woken from this dream I haven't been where I started. For example, I wake up outside, after being in my bed. I'm 5-7 10 years old, whatever. Maybe I came home from school, crashed out on my bed. We were poor, and let's say we're going out for pizza, something a kid having salad dressing sandwiches at school might want to do. Youngest of 6 (now 5). When the family returns they say they searched the whole house, I wasn't there. This is of course after the fact of waking up from said nap, alone in the house.. or wake up outside under the street light (at night), wrapped in my blanket, in the rain, locked out of the house.
Narrating along: Imagine if you will, being alone in absolute black. Those little eye ball patterns, blood vien flashes, checker boards, rushes of red etc.. and all of that are nil. There is absolutely nothing - BLACK. You are an eye ball, just witnessing the black. NOTHING to register in terms of size, shape, distance, time. A complete and total void. There is only the data which indicates absolute zero and you are apparently the only witness to it. While floating through this void, something appears. A sort of gray colored hazy ball. The new data/object now much be measured - How far is it? How big is it? Is it traveling, fixed, depth, breadth.. maybe it's all well and good, unless of course your 5 years old and all these questions begin to fly. It's actually quite overwhelming in that case. And the questions do fly and yet, there is still no way of answering any of them as things cannot be triangulated. Much friction, frustration - as the questions keep flying out and there's no way to answer.
In time another form (gray ball or what have you) appears. Answers begin to happen and yet the questions are flying faster than answers can even begin to be equated. It's like the 1,000 question is registered, and the answer to the third question is coming clear. Confusing voices, questioner, and answerer.
Being able to triangulate some, the mind begins wonder about proportion(s), distance(s), depth(s). It's really difficult to describe. The stress itself is also.. traumatizing, frantic, identified, full on pressure. For the mind of a child, crushing.
Example of depth stuff..: If you take three intersecting lines. Like the corner of a room. With just a tweak of perception, is it a corner, is it poking out at you or away? Obviously to our sense in a room it's a corner and solid.. not sure it can be expressed. How about lines on a train track.. do they point at or away (poor example?). How about a Hyperbolic cube: _http://www.ams.org/featurecolumn/images/january2009/klee8.jpg which way does the box face actually. So, thus it's a matter of perception, in the eye of the beholder.. or something. So there is much play going on in terms of depth, proportion, gravity, size, weight etc.. happening. More gray bubbles are coming into existence, more questions are flying, more measurements are taking form between say, a grain of sand and pressing it against something the size of the sun.. and of course by now I'm up to maybe question 5 and (humoring here a bit) say question 334,967 is demanding an answer - registered.. on to #6.
Then the whole environment changes. No more gray (balls of various shapes, sizes, dimension(s) and void. A whole completely new form/object, thing. It's like a nuclear explosion with tentacles. It's reaching out within the void. It has its own gravity and it's pulling the gray balls into it, they're being engulfed and deteriorating within the fiery tentacles. Slowly they're being drawn into it, more and more. Not sure if they're feeding it and making it grow stronger, or escaping into it, joining it.. it however for me looks absolutely frightening. Concluding it's destroying everything in its path, I panic. I can feel its pull, but the fear is stronger.
As I turn away from the action the empty void comes into view. From a great distance I can make out a few square lines, that at another angle would be invisible.. it seems like a box, or a hatch.. then getting more front on to it, it's fence, it's a house, it's home. I wake up in the backyard, side yard, out front under the street light, and or, sometimes rarely back in my bed. If outside, I'm locked out and running to bang on my moms basement bedroom window or hitting and kicking the the door and mashing on the doorbell. Seems to me my mom never thought to question: How did you get outside? It always ended with, you had a nightmare, go back to bed.
In the end. There has been nothing of my experiences here that would create such a memory, dream, experience. While unable to give visual detail, hopefully a person can grasp what has been attempted to be shared.
Without trying to sound like I have animosity, and in my heart do not. There was a time I was making expression on a personal situation, for a couple of years.. and it seemed to me that people took me sort of.. ho hum over it. Then I showed pictures of what I was experiencing.. and hum and ha was like, holy hell! Run! And I ran 2k miles. The point being; once again, here, being serious. Would someone take me that way? Is the question completely invalid? And if so, why? Is it a stupid question? Has the data already been covered and if so, can I obtain a quote please? Looked and looked.
So, after 3+ decades and a lot of thought; the idea has come to mind that maybe and a big one at that, that maybe (heh, already sounds super cooky to me, and maybe self inflating to others) somehow I'm a bridge. That others (gray balls) not lost in the darkness, who could brave embracing that fire, could walk across that void. Pretty far fetched eh? So, I thought to ask the above question.
Haha! Maybe it's time for a straight jacket and helmet.
:D Salutes!
Genetically, can a person (mind body spirit complex) be a dimensional portal and, can said portal activation be obtained through hypnosis?
