Do you have first sight impression?

[Kay Kim]

I know that, is wrong to judge by first sight without knowing person or things. But I had few encounter with such a case and wondering about it.

About 35 years ago, when I lived in LA, a friend introduced to me her younger brother and that was first time I met him but instantly I know this person was cold-blood cruel savage man. I don't know where I got that kind impression from, because he is normal looking man, but I felt it in chill to the bone and still remember.

One time I went to church for invitation from a friend, because new famous pastor come to take charge on her church, but when I saw him at first glance, instantly felt that, the man is greedy avaricious person that impression of fat pig(I didn't see pig in his face) just feeling. And some times later found out from friend that her church have problems concerning money cause from this pastor.

Nowadays I lost interest to read any fictional books, but some years ago I tried to read book from best seller list. So one day I got the Stephen King's book from Library and tried to read, but when I read just few pages, then it made me irritate like something is crawling my nerve, I tried few more times and gave up.

I make friend very easy with anybody, man, woman or any race, all same to me, just person. But I was worry about my fast judging personality? And never told to anybody before.

Now I beginning to think, maybe that was my subconscious or unconscious reaction?

 

[rs]

I know that, is wrong to judge by first sight without knowing person or things. But I had few encounter with such a case and wondering about it.

About 35 years ago, when I lived in LA, a friend introduced to me her younger brother and that was first time I met him but instantly I know this person was cold-blood cruel savage man. I don't know where I got that kind impression from, because he is normal looking man, but I felt it in chill to the bone and still remember.

One time I went to church for invitation from a friend, because new famous pastor come to take charge on her church, but when I saw him at first glance, instantly felt that, the man is greedy avaricious person that impression of fat pig(I didn't see pig in his face) just feeling. And some times later found out from friend that her church have problems concerning money cause from this pastor.

Nowadays I lost interest to read any fictional books, but some years ago I tried to read book from best seller list. So one day I got the Stephen King's book from Library and tried to read, but when I read just few pages, then it made me irritate like something is crawling my nerve, I tried few more times and gave up.

I make friend very easy with anybody, man, woman or any race, all same to me, just person. But I was worry about my fast judging personality? And never told to anybody before.

Now I beginning to think, maybe that was my subconscious or unconscious reaction?

I think two things:

1) you should always respect and listen to a "gut reaction" - ignoring this usually leads to problems
2) you should always be willing to modify your opinions based on new information.

However, if you have to choose between #1 or #2, I would go with #1.

In Gavin de Becker's book, "The Gift of Fear" he describes lots of meetings with people who had become convinced that they were being stalked, but they did not "know" who was actually the stalker. After an interview, he *always* found that the person did, in fact, know who - they just discounted their own intuition.

Intuition is powerful and is something that should always be listened to.

 

[Alada]

I think two things:

1) you should always respect and listen to a "gut reaction" - ignoring this usually leads to problems
2) you should always be willing to modify your opinions based on new information.

However, if you have to choose between #1 or #2, I would go with #1

Well I think there's a problem there with the word 'always'. Surely each case depends on the context? A 'gut reaction' where there is imminent danger is one thing, where relationships are concerned is another, or a person might have a gut reaction at seeing the name of a certain horse in the 3.45 and then bet the mortgage on it (it happens). If you read Wave vol. 8, Laura talks about 'gut reaction' there - well worth the read.

[quote author=Laura Wave 8]

The Wave Chapter 70: You Take the High Road and I’ll Take the Low Road and I’ll Be in Scotland Afore Ye!

… what we’re saying is that unconscious emotions are probably the rule rather than the exception.

We all know that there are many times in normal, day-to-day experience when we don’t understand where our emotions are coming from – why we feel happy, sad, afraid. For example, let’s say you’re in a restaurant having a meal with a friend and you have a terrible argument at the table, which happens to be covered with a red and white checkered tablecloth. The next day you’re walking down the street and you have this gut feeling that the person walking toward you is someone you don’t like. You’ve never seen the person before, but you know you don’t like him. We often hear about gut feelings and people say, “You have to trust your gut.” But maybe in this case the reason you feel you don’t like this person is simply that he’s wearing a red and white checkered tie. This visual input is going in through your low road, activating your amygdala and causing you to have an unpleasant reaction to the person. You might attribute your reaction to the way this person looks or walks or acts, but in fact it’s just the low road … the unconscious activation of the amygdala.

Some of the time … these low road reactions are useful. Certainly that was the evolutionary goal: to protect us from danger. But these can also be harmful, or at least counterproductive. As in the case of the red and white checkered tie/tablecloth, an unconscious response may not be revealing some sort of inner truth but may instead be doing nothing more than reviving past emotional learning. “Listening to your gut” … might simply mean you are responding to past learning.[/quote]

I haven't read de Becker's book, but am not so sure that fear is a gift. But again that's subjective and dependson the context of the book itself, if its all regarding stalkers then yes, you can see how that could be so.

I think generally speaking we can all have little moments of intuition or 'psychic awareness' or whatever that is, so over the years there can be a few hits, but I think that may be common to lots of folk so wouldn't worry any about being able to pick up on something every now and again.

That said though, we always have to keep in mind the observable facts. What we actually know compared to what we think we know or think we are picking up on. Who knows, the hunch may be right, but often it takes long observation and collection of data to be more certain. So we have to factor in that we can be wrong, even if we are erring on the side of caution I think, keep things open.

 

[rs]

Well I think there's a problem there with the word 'always'.

Well, I agree. I believe that one should always pay attention to intuition, but that does not mean you are a slave to your emotions. I agree that everything has to be placed into context. If one is in a position where you have "this certain feeling that you just can't place", you should pay attention and try and understand just where it is coming from.

 

[Tarri]

When my intuition kicks in I use it as a sign to be VERY aware and pay attention.
Since sometimes nothing comes of it I do not immediately judge with the emotions. Just my 2 cents. Tarri

 

[Woodsman]

All information coming in is worth sifting through.

Intuition of the energetic/soul-sense variety has, I find, a different quality than monkey-response basic psyche programs. -But it's a subtle difference when examined on a purely material basis.

Some people are more tuned than others; I've heard a few stories about people getting strong negative first impressions which had no observable basis but which turned out to be accurate, (like one woman who met a friend's new boy friend and knew it was bad, bad, bad; her misgivings were ignored, the two were married and a couple of years later the whole thing turned into a toxic nightmare scenario).

With practice and use, like anything else, it becomes easier to sort out which senses are saying what.

Another thing I've found is that these signals don't always arrive in total isolation. There are often other external signs if you know where to look; like, if you have a number system (1234 keeps appearing on clocks and cash receipts several times a day!) it might be a reason to pay attention to surrounding events. The C's once described that it was important to make the effort to pay attention to books which present themselves, fall off shelves, and such. (I'm heavily paraphrasing that; I don't know where the exact quote is buried).

One of the interesting aspects of this, I've noted, are the meta-conversations people will have. -Without consciously realizing what they might actually be trying to communicate, sometimes people will meet you in serendipitous ways and strike up abrupt conversations which while they could be explained as perfectly normal on a material-consciousness level, what they're describing happens to line up exactly with an otherwise unrelated problem you're trying to solve, and their eyes and body language communicate an urgency not warranted by the conscious-level content of their words. I've seen some spectacular examples of this, and these days, I listen!

I don't think one has to wander too far afield from regular psychology to explain such things, but I have seen an interesting non-linear (spatial and time-wise) aspect crop up sometimes. That is, in some cases, there's no way a person could have even collected enough information through strict material, linear means to have triggered even a meta-awareness of the situation to act accordingly, suggesting a psychic quality at work. (One person deciding on a whim to clean out the basement and put a red bicycle out on the curb right when somebody was just wishing to themselves very loudly that they had a red bicycle, -while walking a route home they don't normally take so that they intercept it at just the correct moment). I tend to believe that the higher-consciousness of entire communities are in constant communication with each other and prod their dumb monkey bodies into specific actions to try to help their conscious layer selves better navigate their lives, all while trying to respect a sort of "non-interference" law which prevents the sharing of direct knowledge which would by-pass free will.

I also remember reading in one of those Mexican Sorcerer books, (one of Florinda Donner's maybe) that new people when you meet them will announce early on in plain language more or less exactly what they are going to do in the context of your life. When I meet a person who sighs in joking self-derision, "I'm a very difficult person; people always get fed up and leave me." -Rather than blow that off with the automatic desire to sooth somebody's distress, "Oh, I'm sure that's not true. You're just being too hard on yourself." -I listen!

 

[Marina9]

In my past experiences with this topic, i listen to my gut feelings, and sometimes im right. It happens that i know someone that does not give me the right feel.. but try to understand why and keep on talking to them or trying to get to know them better despite what my gut is telling me, for what i can tell you sometimes it goes right and sometimes i say to myself "should've listened my intuition".

As Tarri pointed out, i think that if something doesn't feel right, just pay attention and be aware, without judging right away.

 

[Kay Kim]

I certainly learned lots new concept from this forum discussion about different subjects. Thank you all! In this case, if something doesn't feel right, just pay attention and be aware without judgement.
It is good suggestion but those times, it happened instantly and it was just few times in my life.

But maybe nowadays it will be different reaction, because I am practicing to stay on present moment and still mind.

Woodsman,
I never believed numbers meaning before. I knows that most Korean hate number 4(death) and Chinese like number 8( thriving and prosper?)
But now I am curious about it. Because I was looking back the year 2005. I bought new Chevy-Tahoe, the license plate number was made up with 5's and letters. I don't remember how many 5's, but I am sure it was more than three. After that I was seeing lots 5's those times.

And in few months later, I moved to one bed room APT, due to my 2 kids graduated school and found good job and wanted to live their own, so I start my new life too.

And I was alone, had too much time, so I start to learn Chinese letters, so I could read interesting Chinese books in Library. It was something new and fun.

Then about 6 years ago I was looking something new to read and found out mysterious occultism and start to read new age books first time in my life. It was really fun but feel like there was something more, so I was keep read one book after another until I found Laura's books. And after that I lose interest to any other books.

And last year Summer time I moved to Alaska to start new life and got new license plate.

So maybe 5 mean- change or start something new? What you think?

 

[gambeir]

I'm in agreement with RS.

I did some of my undergraduate work with the county coroner. Always listen to your gut instincts first.


I think the issue here is about developing your senses in this area. I think it's too common to be willing to overlook what your senses have told you, What I work on is developing the ability to discern between things I just personally don't like, or a bias, as opposed to the real alarm bells.

To me it isn't so much about judging people, which is fine once you understand what your senses are telling you, it's about learning how you're going about judging them. So there's a difference.

 

[Kay Kim]

Hello gambeir, do you know how to develop intuition?
Some years ago when I read all the new-age books, there was some technique but I didn't want to do it because I was afraid of become like fortuneteller or maybe not enough passion to do.

But now, if this forum approve some kind of method to develop intuition then I would like to try it, but otherwise not much care.

 

[Alada]

I believe that one should always pay attention to intuition, but that does not mean you are a slave to your emotions. I agree that everything has to be placed into context. If one is in a position where you have "this certain feeling that you just can't place", you should pay attention and try and understand just where it is coming from.

I think the issue here is about developing your senses in this area. I think it's too common to be willing to overlook what your senses have told you, What I work on is developing the ability to discern between things I just personally don't like, or a bias, as opposed to the real alarm bells.

To me it isn't so much about judging people, which is fine once you understand what your senses are telling you, it's about learning how you're going about judging them. So there's a difference.

That’s true, it would be better to have awareness of both sides of the coin, rather than getting a one sided assessment and either making a poor choice because some part of us reacted through conditioned (but irrational) fears, or making a poor choice because we failed to see a danger that was actually there. Which are both blind spots but as pointed out above there’s a difference where each is coming from. Looks as if a reading of "The Gift of Fear" would be in order.

 

[bjorb]

[quote author=Kay Kim]I make friend very easy with anybody, man, woman or any race, all same to me, just person. But I was worry about my fast judging personality? And never told to anybody before.[/quote]

Trying to distinguish between making an observation and being judgmental should help I think.

1. Being judgmental mostly plays in with you assessing another person what can be gained by the Ego. What can this person add in my life?

2. Making an observation is just that.

Nothing wrong with first glance I think when practiced the second. It’s part of the overall observation process but to make decisions based on that is not objective. Unless it really is obvious with who are dealing with of course.

Not everyone is socially skilled which may give the wrong impression how a person really is and some wear a mask, which holds dangerous lies.