Getting motivation to create a happy sustainable life.

[patty2292]

Hey guys and gals! Just looking to see if any of you have any advice in regards to the emotional state of confusion i have found myself in!

(Bare with me, i find it hard to express emotions into understandable sentences! )

Within the past week or so, i have lost my guidance and motivation to create the future i would love to have and had planned for awhile; living with close friends, preparing/eating real food, having a not so flashy or excessive job, and mostly having enough spare time to venture the outdoors.

I feel that my demon inside has once again shown its face when my only two closest friends went away for the week.
Within this time i lost my job (it wasn't much for me anyway to say the least), lost close contact with my ex-girlfriend (which was what needed to happen for us to let go and grow), and resorted to spending time with people who brought me down as a person due to the loneliness i encountered, this is because i am a very emotionally open person and like to speak about what i am feeling/thinking to gain a greater outside understanding and third party perspective of my situations.
But in this circumstance i let myself get roped into my old habits, and the habits of my old friends because at the time the thought of being alone at all was worse than being with people who bring me down.

Since my friends have returned i feel immediately better and more whole again. But i have completely lost the direction in which my path was leading me, and now feel i have no way of creating a happy sustainable future, in such an unhappy and unsustainable world.

I personally feel that to create what i want, i have to pollute or detriment my conscious evolution and happiness in some way or form, which i am finding hard to accept or to find a balance.

Me being only 21, with a good family to help me out in times of need, and very good productive friends, i know i am a lot better off than most and in the end everything will be okay. But i am just seeing if anyone else has felt so lost with what to do with their life, due to the amount of options there are to take. And if anyone has any advise or activities to partake in to boost my motivation and greater understanding of what i want with my future?

(I mentioned the points in brackets to let you understand these things in the long run where somewhat for the better)

Thanks alot for letting me get some emotional boil up off my chest, i feel a lot lighter now :P

 

[Tigersoap]

Hello patty2292,

Everyone from time to time needs to re-evaluate what to do with one's life and how best continue toward our aims whatever they are.
The important thing is to try not beating yourself up when what you wanted to do does not go according to the plan you had in your head.

Everybody makes mistakes and get roped into old habits as you put it. The important part is to learn from it, pick yourself up and keep going.
If you feel comfortable enough you can talk a bit more about this if you want.

I personally feel that to create what i want, i have to pollute or detriment my conscious evolution and happiness in some way or form, which i am finding hard to accept or to find a balance.

Nothing can be perfect and we all have to make compromises and deal with life as it is.
Unless you're making moral choices that are hurtful to you or others I am not sure I understand in what ways you think you're polluting your conscious evolution ?

[quote author=patty2292]But i am just seeing if anyone else has felt so lost with what to do with their life, due to the amount of options there are to take. And if anyone has any advise or activities to partake in to boost my motivation and greater understanding of what i want with my future?[/quote]

Most everyone can sometimes feel paralyzed with the amount of options life can throw at us but it's the fear of failing, to make the wrong decisions that may be the real issue.

Perhaps making a list of what you'd like to achieve and see if it's realistically possible and what steps could be taken in that direction.
It does not need to be big goals, even simple tasks (cooking once a day a meal that you like), as long as you're moving on and building up the confidence in yourself that you can actually do things.

Perhaps you could try to start journaling about your experiences as it might help you to clear up your head.

The following thread might be a good start : Redirect: The surprising new science of psychological change

Hope it helps a bit ;)

 

[Ina]

Great advice from Tigersoap. When you were saying that there is a difference between functioning 'alone' and functioning 'around others', I recognized my preference as well. However it is important to know how much of the group 'creation' becomes your foundation. So next time you are alone start like in unix: whoami?

I bet unix was invented by cassiopaeans or equivalent. :)

cheers