Getting side tracked

[Miss Isness]

Hi, this is my first post, and I'd like to start by saying thanks to all of you for your combined efforts in making the truth available to those who are interested.

I've noticed that there have been periods in my life when my health weakens, I lose my passion for the things that normally interest me, and I become intensely introspective. These periods usually coincide with certain astrological transits, as well as close relationships that involve confrontation with evasiveness, deception, denial, and individuals that I find dominating or threatening. The thing is, I'm not sure if I'm having a healing crisis, or I'm getting myself more deeply entrenched in bad habit patterns that are draining me. I've been trying to observe my feelings and explore different ways of looking at my current situation, but I'm having difficulty finding clarity. I'm sure that I'm approaching a crucial decision that has the potential to radically change my outlook for better or for worse, but I have so much inner conflict going on I don't see how I can make a balanced choice. Any suggestions? Oh, and by the way, I've already read most of the material on the Cassiopea site, but I wouldn't mind rereading something pertinent as I often get more on the second time through.

I got sidetracked and trapped some time ago, and I've been trying to eliminate the habit patterns that betrayed me ever since, and I'm sure I've made some progress. The thing is, now I'm acutely aware of my susceptibility and instead of being excited about a fantastic opportunity for change that lies ahead, I'm afraid of getting stuck in another downward spiral.

 

[MaskedAvatar]

Hello.

This sounds like a familiar (almost ubiquitous) part of the human condition. Most people will just suppress it and get on with things because they want to or they "have" to.

Trust and fear seem to be big issues for you. Amongst all the confusion how will you know when you have found what you call clarity? How will you be or feel or think differently at that point?

 

[Miss Isness]

Yes , trust and fear are big issues, and I think I've learned that there's no short cut - trust has to be earned. As to knowing when I've found clarity, well, that's an excellent question. Perhaps it has to do with knowing I can trust myself to see the truth, and not just what I want to see.....