Grimology

[GRiM]

Well, thanks for reading my story.

I will get right to the core of the problem, or what I think is the core of my problem. I´we lost much of my energy, I'm really tired and have lost my will to do things, I think that's its related to the "fact" (i think its a fact) that I'm peeling away my mechanical side of me, and I cant come up with anything to fill it with.
I would like to take a stance and begin to help people learn about the objective truth, but I'm not feeling confident enough about all the facts and I sometimes feel as my small speeches don't really help people understand, well its not like I'm standing on a chair in the middle of the street shouting, I mean more like friends and stuff.
My next point is about the my school; I'm studying cognitive neuroscience and philosophy. While I thought it looked good on paper, before I started to really look into the esoteric and related material, I now find it quite boring and uninspiring.
Last point is one I guess almost everyone here or quite a few also have experienced, the pressure from parents and friends "to be a little bit interested in "weird" stuff, but to know that life is still about how makes the most money.." When I try to steer or start a conversation about the problems of the world and psychopathy, our (secret)history and any other subject in that category It always comes down to; "Yeah, that's one opinion..." (I try to exclude C material and speculations, but still get that line)

[I will post more about my Work progress in a later post.]

I guess these are quite generic problems but they take so much of my energy :( I would like to do positive things and not just bare minimum.

 

[dhess31]

Hi Grim,
This being low on energy that you are experiecing will happen. Any time that one begins to do "the work" it is a big shock to the system. As the layers and layers of buffers and identification get peeled away, sometimes you ARE left with nothing because as far as the work goes, it's because what you had before that you THOUGHT was something really was just an illusion.

And that hurts. I've lost interest in MANY things that I used to like to do, or thought was important.

But you have to keep plugging along. Eventually that "emptiness" will fill with B influences and if you continue on you can eventually have full being, will and consciousness. But it is a long, hard road.

Don't let the "fear" of not thinking you know something stop you from trying. I've fallen into this trap myself, many times. That is what the network is for; if you are unsure of a concept, I'm sure one of us has been down the road already and we can help.

And don't forget free will; I've found that a lot of the times people aren't READY for the truth. When I was new I figured everyone would want to hear the truth.

Sadly, that isn't the case.

It IS so discouraging that people don't get it. But it is best not to waste time on them. If someone is ready, you can usually tell by the questions that they ask.

And sometimes, especially at first, it is best to work on yourself alone first and not to let people know what you are doing, lest the system make it's attacks on you unbearable. Mouravieff talks about this in "Gnosis".

Don

 

[GRiM]

Thanks so much for the answer!
You were spot on with that feeling of emptiness (and the feeling of beeing very alone in the journey).
I dont want to sound whiney, but I guess im whining so its quite hard not to sound like it.

I have to think about that for a while so I can write a reply!