Help or advice in regards to psychopathy

[circleofstones]

The psychopath came into my life for a reason.

The experience is very hard for me to explain as I had no knowledge or frame of reference to put words to it . The best I can come up with is mythic or other worldly. I am not sure I want to use the word evil as well but it was frighting because it was beyond anything I knew.

I am not trying to sound dramatic as I am way past the discovery and shock stage but I am having problems with recovery (for lack of a better word) because I need to know the reason and why the psychopath showed up.

How he came into my life was nothing short of bizarre and mere coincidences does not come close to the explanation. I know he came for a purpose and when his job (five yrs later) was done the trance was broken and as odd as this sounds I remember the exact moment.

So my search has led me many places and now here in hopes of finding answers. I want to be whole again because I feel something was taken from me by him. He took the "twinkle in my eye" and maybe that sounds silly but it does have something to do with either the spirit or life force.

I want it back, he did not deserve it. I am angry he used me for this purpose.

This is one thing where I will not except "we don't know why or some things just can't be explained" answer because I know there is one and I can't rest easy until I find it.

I welcome any advice, wisom, or insight. Thank you for taking the time to read my post.

 

[Vulcan59]

Hi circleofstones,

Check out this link here where all the important information we've managed to dig up on psychopaths are posted. There is also a book called "Political Ponerology" written by the late Prof. Andrew M. Lobaczewski. Laura has written a commentary on the book which you can read here. :)

 

[circleofstones]

Thank you

 

[knowledge_of_self]

Hi circleofstones

I'm sorry that this psychopath hurt you so bad. But just know that you're not alone. Vulcan made really good suggestions, I just wanted to add that I think you should definitely read the book Women Who Love Psychopaths by Sandra L Brown. This book is specifically written for women who have been hurt by psychopathic men, and since you used the word "he" in your post, I think you may find this book very informative. You can also check out her site,

http://www.saferelationships.com/

Good luck

 

[circleofstones]

Hi circleofstones

I'm sorry that this psychopath hurt you so bad. But just know that you're not alone. Vulcan made really good suggestions, I just wanted to add that I think you should definitely read the book Women Who Love Psychopaths by Sandra L Brown. This book is specifically written for women who have been hurt by psychopathic men, and since you used the word "he" in your post, I think you may find this book very informative. You can also check out her site,

http://www.saferelationships.com/

Good luck

Hi Deedlet and thank you for your reply. I have read the book you mentioned and yes I agree it is an excellent resource.
I think what I am trying to understand now is the spiritual aspects or meaning of the encounter as it was other wordly or mystical for lack of a better term.
Like I said in my post there was a greater message or meaning to this and I want to at least try to find out, get it right or come to terms with whatever I needed to learn. Does this make sense?

 

[EmeraldHope]

Hi circleofstones

I'm sorry that this psychopath hurt you so bad. But just know that you're not alone. Vulcan made really good suggestions, I just wanted to add that I think you should definitely read the book Women Who Love Psychopaths by Sandra L Brown. This book is specifically written for women who have been hurt by psychopathic men, and since you used the word "he" in your post, I think you may find this book very informative. You can also check out her site,

http://www.saferelationships.com/

Good luck

Hi Deedlet and thank you for your reply. I have read the book you mentioned and yes I agree it is an excellent resource.
I think what I am trying to understand now is the spiritual aspects or meaning of the encounter as it was other wordly or mystical for lack of a better term.
Like I said in my post there was a greater message or meaning to this and I want to at least try to find out, get it right or come to terms with whatever I needed to learn. Does this make sense?

If you have not read The Wave yet, it may help to answer some of your questions: http://www.cassiopaea.org/cass/waveindex.htm

 

[Renaissance]

Hi Deedlet and thank you for your reply. I have read the book you mentioned and yes I agree it is an excellent resource.
I think what I am trying to understand now is the spiritual aspects or meaning of the encounter as it was other wordly or mystical for lack of a better term.
Like I said in my post there was a greater message or meaning to this and I want to at least try to find out, get it right or come to terms with whatever I needed to learn. Does this make sense?

Even though you have read Women who love Psychopaths, I still suggest reading through the thread/link Deetlet provided. Laura wrote a post that has some great insight here.

and welcome to the forum, Circlofstone. :)

 

[Buddy]

Hi circleofstones.

I can't think of anything to add to the excellent resources already suggested, so I will just say I hope you can find the info you're looking for.

Welcome to the forum. :)

 

[circleofstones]

Emeraldhope -thank you for the link. Looks like that will keep me busy for a while. Are there any chapters you recommend in particular

Shane-thank you for sending me the Laura link, I will no doubt have a look. You are right regarding the "safe relationships" site and I need to go back and visit. I signed up to recieve their emails.

Bud-thank you for the welcome!

 

[knowledge_of_self]

Emeraldhope -thank you for the link. Looks like that will keep me busy for a while. Are there any chapters you recommend in particular

Hey Circleofstones

We usually recommend people read the whole book since it all ties in together. Therefore, I don't have a particular chapter to recommend. They're all great :P

Oh and after you're done that, there is the Adventure Series that continues the Wave.

Happy Reading! :D

 

[iloveyoghurt]

I think what I am trying to understand now is the spiritual aspects or meaning of the encounter as it was other wordly or mystical for lack of a better term.
Like I said in my post there was a greater message or meaning to this and I want to at least try to find out, get it right or come to terms with whatever I needed to learn. Does this make sense?

Hi circleofstone, I know I think, just what you mean. I hope I am not treading on any toes by reaching out to you, (my life is not exactly a bed of roses at the mo) but, I did had a very weird similar experience about 8 years ago that I still have questions about, in regards to spiritual attachments and stuff

However, as far as preservation for yourself goes, I think what I've learned is that, you need to search, find and educate yourself on ways to protect yourself. Strong boundaries -especially mental and psychic ones, and self-love is most important; you have to love yourself enough to want to draw boundaries for yourself. It also helps to learn generally about the cruelty of (some) others, and not underestimate this capacity and lack of care for others that they have. I also believe that, action on your behalf that is fueled by resentment, revenge or any "high passion" emotion will only put you off balance, drain you, and drag you in further. If you feel like this for an inkling, you must restrain from all action, and divert your attention immediately. Actions tend to propagate.

Focus only on recovering your life back asap, it will give you strength, and you will look back and know you acted with integrity, and looked after yourself. Actions tend to propagate.

All the best

 

[Aaron r]

Hi circleofstones, seems to me that your gut instincts are telling you that there was a lot more going on in your relationship than just simply boy meets girl and it did not work out in the end. To get some appreciation of what else could have been going on I would recommend reading the Wave series of books by Laura. Through reading about her life it may give you insight into your interaction with the psychopath.