I was feeling very bad yesterday - car hit a dog

[D69]

I was driving back home in the evening yesterday and suddenly I noticed that cars that are ahead me started to break , so all traffic slowed down.
I also noticed people staring at something I didn't see yet because of cars.
In the next few seconds I was passing next to a dog that was hit by a car- I felt literally like it was me that was hit by a car. That dog was still probably in a shock and it was trying to move out of a street , but it looked like it had broken rear leg but finally managed to move.
In that moment i had a very strong urge to stop and help somehow but before I did that , I noticed a car that pulled over and stopped.
At first i thought someone stopped and wanted to help , but then I noticed that guy inside a car started to argue with two girls on a bus stop through a window , and literally two seconds after i passed next to him , he came back on street and drove away. I already passed that scene so it was kinda too late to stop. So still driving i noted his plate numbers and drove away too.
The point is that i am feeling very bad that i didn't stop in a first place - i was feeling almost like crying because of helplessness . I could help that dog somehow.On the other hand if I did that , veterinary costs would probably fall on me and at this moment in time i cannot afford that.But I feel it is not an explanation.
In that very second i had one sentence in my mind - The real evil is when people ignore and choose not to help.
Could anyone comment on this , what what you do in similar situation ?
Maybe looking at your points of view , it will help me understand what i did wrong.
I am seriously confused by what i did or did not.

 

[pete02]

Hi drygol,

I don't think you did anything wrong to be honest. It is a horrible thing to witness when something like that happens and our first (normal human) instinct is to help the poor creature but the chance to help passed you by and I think there might have been a reason for that.

The past twenty or so years I have lived in a country setting and I would be lying if I said I've never hit an animal before. Not any cats or dogs but what really makes them different from deer or raccoon or squirrels for that matter. Don't get me wrong, this gives me a 'sick to my stomach' feeling and there really is nothing worse but it does happen and on more than one occasion I have learned a lesson from it. Most of the time the lesson was basically to slow down. I had never really given it any thought but all those times I was speeding along I was putting my own life at risk as well as others and the way the universe got me to pay attention apparently was by hitting an innocent creature causing me to feel horrible and slow down. Eventually I learned my lesson and thankfully its been some time since anything like that has happened to me.

Sorry to go on about this with you but I guess what I'm trying to say is that I believe it to be someone else's lesson that you witnessed and I don't think you were wrong by not having the opportunity to help. Someone else hit that animal and it was up to them to decide whether or not to stop and do the right thing. Time to choose whether they would align more to STS or STO so to say. All of life is lessons and maybe this one was not yours. Fwiw, I think this is one way you could look at it.

 

[D69]

Thank you very much for your post Pete02.

I cannot be sure but I don`t think that guy hit a dog intentionally , we were all driving quite slow , it was in an urban area. What I am trying to say is that it was probably simple accident.
It could be of course lesson for someone else , but on the other hand , if that guy chose to drive away not doing anything to help poor animal , than I as a witness could do something - I don`t know i feel that way.

Anyway thank you very much for showing how you see it. It also helped me to rethink my speeding addiction.

 

[pete02]

drygol I wasn't saying he hit the dog intentionally or that my story was directly pertaining to your situation. My apologies, I guess I wasn't clear on that. I was just expressing that the whole accident might have had a particular purpose at that time and not to beat yourself up. If my post at least lightened your mood for a lil bit then I'm happy with that and I've helped another driver slow down!

 

[spyraal]

Hello,

I already passed that scene so it was kinda too late to stop. So still driving i noted his plate numbers and drove away too.
The point is that i am feeling very bad that i didn't stop in a first place - i was feeling almost like crying because of helplessness . I could help that dog somehow.On the other hand if I did that , veterinary costs would probably fall on me and at this moment in time i cannot afford that.But I feel it is not an explanation.
In that very second i had one sentence in my mind - The real evil is when people ignore and choose not to help.

Indeed. It is only my opinion, but since you asked, i think that you should have stopped. The moment this came to your attention, you had a choice. Did you really have time to think of the veterinary costs at that moment?
Maybe that was but an excuse you rationalized later for relieving your consciousness. You also said yourself that this is "not an explanation". Because if it is, then the next question would be how much or how little money you are willing to spend before you deem a situation where your help is needed "too expensive" to get involved? And that is a scary question to ask. I believe you get my point here.

I don't think you did anything wrong to be honest. It is a horrible thing to witness when something like that happens and our first (normal human) instinct is to help the poor creature but the chance to help passed you by and I think there might have been a reason for that.

It could be so. But it could also be the exact opposite: Dryol passed by the chance to helped. Could you Pete explain what you believe might have been the reason for that, a "higher" kind of reason as i understand?
Maybe this is what you describe later:

The past twenty or so years I have lived in a country setting and I would be lying if I said I've never hit an animal before. Not any cats or dogs but what really makes them different from deer or raccoon or squirrels for that matter. Don't get me wrong, this gives me a 'sick to my stomach' feeling and there really is nothing worse but it does happen and on more than one occasion I have learned a lesson from it. Most of the time the lesson was basically to slow down. I had never really given it any thought but all those times I was speeding along I was putting my own life at risk as well as others and the way the universe got me to pay attention apparently was by hitting an innocent creature causing me to feel horrible and slow down.

I admit it sounds a bit strange to my ears when you seem to claim that the "reason" the universe sent deers, raccoons and squirrels to get crashed by your speeding car is only to give you a lesson to slow down and not put yourself to risk. And on "more that one occasion"? It seems that you do not learn your lessons the easy way -too bad, for the poor animals at least. Everything in the creation and the way we interact with it can have the potential to serve as a lesson, and maybe that is why it exists in the first place, but the whole creation serving as us as "expandable educational material" of a kind is another thing. This IMO is quite internally considerate. As 3rd density creatures we have responsibility towards other creatures of the 2nd density. We can learn from animals so much by how they live, and not by deciding if and how they will live or die according to what suits ourselves, our needs or "lessons". Maybe the way we treat 2nd density beings sets a pattern of how we are or will be treated by 4rth density in return.

Sorry to go on about this with you but I guess what I'm trying to say is that I believe it to be someone else's lesson that you witnessed and I don't think you were wrong by not having the opportunity to help. Someone else hit that animal and it was up to them to decide whether or not to stop and do the right thing. Time to choose whether they would align more to STS or STO so to say. All of life is lessons and maybe this one was not yours. Fwiw, I think this is one way you could look at it.

It is hard to draw the line between "my lesson" and "his lesson", and not interfering in each other's "lessons". But i believe lessons come from our (passive or active) choices. And the moment we are becoming aware of a situation where we can help and stand for what is right, either we stand or walk, we ARE making a choice. I do not agree with the notion that "someone else" hit the poor dog and only him was responsible and ought to take care of it. I feel this is leaning towards pathological thinking. You say it is "time [for Them] to choose whether they would align more to STS or STO". So, when it is OUR time to do so, or is it that we have already "earned" the STO alignment? I don't think so. Where does this thinking leads us but to apathy, indifference, self centeredness and utterly the perpetuation of our attachment to STS alignment?

All in all, i think Drygol had the choice to stop and help, and he/she passed it. And I respect that choice for what it is. But in any case, by this thread it becomes obvious that this is becoming as much a lesson for the driver that hurt this dog as it is for Drygol. So this separation of lessons and responsibilities done by Pete is not very plausible to me. IMO a person trying to become an STO candidate should ideally have better soul "reflexes" and little to none reaction time especially when it concerns the mistreat and suffering of our 2nd density fellow beings, our friends, companions and teachers in this planet.

Or this is what i think FWIW.
:)

 

[daniello]

To begin with, drygol, I'd like to hug You. I once had a similar situation, in which I felt the same emotions.
It's really positive, that You felt empathy to this dog. Sure, You could have helped, but as You may know, everything is just a lesson (so take it easy ). I'm not sure, whether it was only the driver-who-hit-the-dog thing to handle.
Now, You should come back to your recent feelings. I don't want to proclaim, what should have been done. Just look at this case from the other side. You said, you regret, that you drove away, right?. It's important, to trust our inner emotions and intentions. The next time You'll know what to do. That's the case :)

 

[D69]

Indeed. It is only my opinion, but since you asked, i think that you should have stopped. The moment this came to your attention, you had a choice. Did you really have time to think of the veterinary costs at that moment?
Maybe that was but an excuse you rationalized later for relieving your consciousness. You also said yourself that this is "not an explanation". Because if it is, then the next question would be how much or how little money you are willing to spend before you deem a situation where your help is needed "too expensive" to get involved? And that is a scary question to ask. I believe you get my point here.

You are absolutely correct here ! Deep inside I know I should have stopped so I can easily call it an excuse now.

and he/she passed it

he ;)

It is hard to draw the line between "my lesson" and "his lesson", and not interfering in each others "lessons". But i believe lessons come from our (passive or active) choices. And the moment we are becoming aware of a situation where we can help and stand for what is right, either we stand or walk, we ARE making a choice.

Exactly , his lesson does not have to be dedicated to him only , It was a lesson or rather test for me as well ... and i failed passing it.
I must say that i think in a similar way. But I have to admit that at that moment in time it didn't`t work , I basically freaked out and run like a coward. That is the real problem , I think i made wrong choice.
So there was nothing wrong with soul reflex , I rather think it was just a wrong choice , like "let someone else deal with it".

To begin with, drygol, I'd like to hug You. I once had a similar situation, in which I felt the same emotions.
It's really positive, that You felt empathy to this dog. Sure, You could have helped, but as You may know, everything is just a lesson (so take it easy ). I'm not sure, whether it was only the driver-who-hit-the-dog thing to handle.
Now, You should come back to your recent feelings. I don't want to proclaim, what should have been done. Just look at this case from the other side. You said, you regret, that you drove away, right?. It's important, to trust our inner emotions and intentions. The next time You'll know what to do. That's the case Smiley

At the end of the day , I hope i learned my lesson and that I`ll act different if something similar happens again ...but until then , I`ll never know if I'll run away or stop and help.
Anyway , I would like to thank you all for your input , It really helped a lot ... helped a lot to understand
Thank you.

 

[pete02]

It could be so. But it could also be the exact opposite: Dryol passed by the chance to helped.

Good point. I suppose when I posted I was trying to find a way not to make drygol feel worse however as it turns out it wasn't a good thing for either of us to avoid the possible truth of the situation.

I admit it sounds a bit strange to my ears when you seem to claim that the "reason" the universe sent deers, raccoons and squirrels to get crashed by your speeding car is only to give you a lesson to slow down and not put yourself to risk. And on "more that one occasion"? It seems that you do not learn your lessons the easy way

I can agree with you there also, it did come out sounding strange, however I was a young man and accidents happened. I thought it would be best to learn a lesson from it rather than to just say oh well, and to be quite honest, in this neck of the woods, even the best drivers end up hitting animals at sometime or another. I think you are being pretty harsh for not knowing the exact circumstances from which I speak but that is my fault for not elaborating further about the area.

too bad, for the poor animals at least

Maybe I'm not reading you correctly here but this sounds a little of sarcasm to me. We have all done things in life that we regret but I honestly considered those accidents to be learning lessons. I'm not proud of it but I don't make a habit out of killing 2D creatures either. I value 2D creatures just as well as anyone else.

Exactly , his lesson does not have to be dedicated to him only , It was a lesson or rather test for me as well ... and i failed passing it.

drygol, point well taken. I must say that I have learned somewhat from your thread. I have learned never to hide honesty just to try and make someone feel better. My apologies for not coming out and being honest with you. I suppose the way I came across has me sounding a bit heartless but I can assure you, thats not the case.

 

[daniello]

I must say that I have learned somewhat from your thread. I have learned never to hide honesty just to try and make someone feel better.

I feel I need to say something about the bold sentence.
If a person does not want any help, even that from our point of view he/she needs it, we have to respect someone' free will. If we send "light&love" there, where we're not asked to, we simply manipulate and the final effect is totally opposite from our goal. I'm pretty sure, that Cs said sth about this case.


edit: I found the fragment

Q: (L) And there are people for whom STS is simply their choice. It is their path.
A: Close.
Q: (L) So, it is a judgment and a disservice to try to convert someone to your path, even if you perceive the end result of the path they are on, that it leads to dissolution? It is still their chosen path?
A: Yes.
Q: (L) And, if you send 'buckets of love and light' to such a one, and that is their path, you are violating their free will?
A: You might as well send "buckets" of vomit as that is how they will react. Judgment is STS.

 

[pete02]

Hi Daniello, could you please clarify as to how what you have quoted relates to this thread?

If a person does not want any help,

I believe just posting the issue designated that drygol was asking for help.

we have to respect someone' free will

I don't see how I violated anyones free will.

If we send "light&love" there, where we're not asked to

I didn't send light and love to anyone either and drygol 'was' asking.

we simply manipulate and the final effect is totally opposite from our goal.

I wasn't trying to save drygol and manipulation is the farthest thing from my mind. What would I be trying to manipulate him into anyway?

I think you misunderstand what is being said here. Honestly I know what the C's have said in the quote you have provided but I don't see how it applies here.

 

[anart]

Daniello,

I think it is important to understand that if someone brings a topic to this forum, they are asking for help. The Law of Three always applies: there is right and there is wrong and there is the specific situation that determines which is which.

 

[daniello]

I think you misunderstand what is being said here. Honestly I know what the C's have said in the quote you have provided but I don't see how it applies here.

Hello again :) I think we misunderstood each other.
Here is what I understood: You posted, that you have learned to always make someone make and feel better. My reply referred to this 'always' ( although this word wasn't mentioned)
My previous post was not connected with drygol's topic. I just referred to the last sentence of Pete02.
Is everything clear now? Or there's something I've missed?

 

[D69]

Just to clarify , I just wanted to know your points of view.
Every point of view is interesting and needed IMO.
Personally I treat it as a learning curve for us all , so this topic is not MINE only , it is ours - simply we are getting more knowledge via networking.
I remember i was stuck on a computer configuration riddle , and i was trying to figure out why it is not working (it was about bind9 DNS based system , for those who are interested). After TWO weeks i noticed that whole script was missing one dot (sic!). Obviously i was following the same thinking pattern for two weeks.
So if i knew someone who had experience with this kind of configuration , I would simply ask him/her to take a look.
That's why I think we should ask questions when we are confused. It might save a lot of time
I am really thankful for all your posts guys and gals :)
My lesson is learned and like I said , i hope i learned it well - "time" will show

 

[spyraal]

too bad, for the poor animals at least

Maybe I'm not reading you correctly here but this sounds a little of sarcasm to me. We have all done things in life that we regret but I honestly considered those accidents to be learning lessons. I'm not proud of it but I don't make a habit out of killing 2D creatures either. I value 2D creatures just as well as anyone else.

I am sorry if i sounded like that, but that was not my intention. :) I only wanted to make a rather funny comment on the animals' point view of the situation. No offense meant Pete! ;)

Thank you
:)

 

[pete02]

I am really thankful for all your posts guys and gals
My lesson is learned and like I said , i hope i learned it well - "time" will show

I second that notion, thank you for the post also drygol.

No offense meant Pete!

None taken. I just wanted to make sure I hadn't offended you. In the future I will try to clarify my meaning better and maybe put a little more 'external consideration' into my thoughts before I post. ;)

My previous post was not connected with drygol's topic. I just referred to the last sentence of Pete02.
Is everything clear now? Or there's something I've missed?

I'm sorry Daniello but I still don't see how you are interpreting my thoughts to 'try and make someone feel better' about a situation turning into manipulation and forcing against their free will? I think your either misinterpreting what is being said or maybe trying to make a 'mountain out of the proverbial molehill'. My intention was only to help.