Is it me or is a serious division of realities occuring?

[mach66]

Hello all, long time no post.
I am wondering if it is just me or has anyone else had the experiences I am about to relate lately?

It seems that ever since I found this website, read "The wave", and have begun to read "In Search of the Miraculous" that my concept of reality and most others around me is vastly different. I don't mean that in way that says, "I think that apple is red", and they say "No that apple is green". What I mean is I can have an interaction with someone (it seems to mostly be with family) and 5 minutes later, their version of what occurred is completely different than what actually happened in my memory of the situation. It is getting to the point where I almost start to question myself and question my own sanity. This has to be by design of the manipulation occurring within the Matrix I'm sure. I know I am intelligent, insightful, and very aware of what is going on around me. I spend pretty much every moment of ever day in deep thought about what is going on and why things are happening the way they are. It is almost like I am in conscious meditation throughout my waking experience. I am constantly looking for attacks, traps, and illusions.

If I am concentrating this hard on operating in a conscious state of awareness and not letting my Ego take over my thoughts, reactions etc.., then why is everyone acting like I'm the "crazy" one? I understand that most of the world is asleep and pretty much responding to a sub conscious program being ran which creates an illusion for them. This illusion is bolstered by continuous propaganda and mind jello-ing distractions. Still, it seems to me that reality can't be that different within a 5 minute period for two different subjects can it? I have recently had both my wife and my mother, repeat their account of an interaction gone bad, and accuse me of doing something or acting in a way that I know deep in my heart that didn't occur.

At the same time, I am dealing with my whole family and wife being sucked deeper and deeper into Christianity. It seems like all of sudden, the Christianity machine has been kicked into high gear and the power of whatever it is that takes over their thought centers is more powerful than ever. They refuse to crack a single book or look up a single fact that might lend some credibility to the fact that I have reason for not believing in Dogmas or religion. They want to tell me how wrong I am and actually treat me like I'm being brain warped by some cult. I find that ridiculous as I belong to not one single group or idea. I realize this is what religion does to people and try not to let their concepts of me in that sense bother me too much. I do however, worry that the effects of their brainwashing (sorry, religious indoctrinations) are beginning to seriously alter their view of things that exist in this world and are documented as fact. I can't have a discussion about anything real with these people. Anytime I try to discuss something that is more science based than anything, I am met with almost an anger level, an attack level response. I am saddened that they are not willing to open their eyes even a little tiny bit, but it is not my responsibility to open their eyes for them and I realize this.

Aside from the religious angle of this paradox I seem to be experiencing, is there any other explanation for such different concepts of reality or events that have taken place? I know we (solar system) is in a very energetic area of the galaxy and we are on the very edge of Realm Border Crossing (hopefully), and that could explain the High Strangeness I seem to be experiencing. There is the saying "what is real for you is you reality, what is real for me, is my reality" I have always taken that in the context of the above apple example. Now it seems as though people are truly experiencing different realities. It seems to me that there is a true and conceivable separation of realities even between me and those I share the space and time with. I truly hope it is not me who is going crazy and that possibly there are those resistant to the current cosmic changes, that are experiencing mental blockages or something of that sort and that is causing them to relate to my views as "craziness".

I am aware that this posting is full of "me's" and "I's". I am not self absorbed and only consider myself in this experience. I am just having a very strange experience as of the last 6 months or so and needed to express it from a first person point of view so that I could try to convey my internal strife with what I am experiencing. I do care for those around me and I am constantly trying to find ways to communicate with them in a "non-threatening" manner that won't tread on their beliefs or result in a STS action on my behalf. I do love and care about those who surround me, yet I feel a division occurring and they need to figure out where they are on the Knowledge cycle and how far they want or don't want to travel it.

Any and all opinions are very welcomed. Even if they relate to me being completely paranoid and self absorbed. I almost hope that is the case rather than things being as strange as they seem.

thank you,
Mach66

 

[Rich]

If I am concentrating this hard on operating in a conscious state of awareness and not letting my Ego take over my thoughts, reactions etc.., then why is everyone acting like I'm the "crazy" one?

Hi Mach66

What you are writing here is a common reaction to those who embark on searching for the truth and undertaking 'the work'. It is a minority of people who do this so unless one is careful about how they communicate and how they behave then yes, everyone else will think you are acting crazy :)

One of the important concepts is 'external consideration'. For some reassurance and guidance you can search the forum for examples where this has been discussed. It is quite normal to face criticism from other people in every day discussion on a whole range of subjects that challenge the mainstream view. It is a skill to learn what you can say to others and it becomes especially important in ones relationships with family in friends. Do check the glossary out too: http://www.cassiopedia.org/glossary/External_and_Internal_Considering:

In 4th Way parlance, this is the practice of taking others into account when acting. External considering involves making a realistic evaluation of another's situation and acting in ways which take this into account in a positive sense.

External considering is however not the same thing as being socially polite or considerate, although it may be expressed in this manner.

The key concept is to be aware of and to adapt oneself to the level of being and knowledge of others. Thus, external considering involves for example not talking about things which would simply offend others' beliefs or simply not be understood. External considering relates to an idea of general good will towards the environment, then in the sense of letting the environment be as it wishes and responding to its requests in a manner that honors its right to be as it will.

And of course, continue reading ISOTM where Gurdjieff also discusses this.

 

[PepperFritz]

At the same time, I am dealing with my whole family and wife being sucked deeper and deeper into Christianity.... They refuse to crack a single book or look up a single fact that might lend some credibility to the fact that I have reason for not believing in Dogmas or religion. They want to tell me how wrong I am and actually treat me like I'm being brain warped by some cult.

Why are you continuing to insist that your family read what you want them to read, why are you continuing to push your own views on them? It appears that you have not followed the advice that was previously given to you concerning Free Will, External Consideration and Strategic Enclosure. Your current behaviour towards your family -- which stems from your desire that they believe what you believe, think what you think -- will only result in more of the same responses from them, if you do not begin to learn how to keep your own counsel.

If I am concentrating this hard on operating in a conscious state of awareness and not letting my Ego take over my thoughts, reactions etc.., then why is everyone acting like I'm the "crazy" one?

There's nothing "mysterious" going on there. It is hardly surprising that your family is having a negative reaction towards you when you are so openly advertising the fact that your current beliefs and view points are so widely diverging from theirs. If you wish to "settle things down", it would be wise to stop provoking them in that manner. Clearly, it is not accomplishing anything "positive" for any of you.

I can't have a discussion about anything real with these people. Anytime I try to discuss something that is more science based than anything, I am met with almost an anger level, an attack level response. I am saddened that they are not willing to open their eyes even a little tiny bit, but it is not my responsibility to open their eyes for them and I realize this.

Clearly you do NOT "realize this"; otherwise you would not continue to try and discuss matters with them that you KNOW they will not be receptive to, and will only make them angry.

If I am concentrating this hard on operating in a conscious state of awareness and not letting my Ego take over my thoughts, reactions etc.... I am not self absorbed and only consider myself in this experience....

From what you have written, it seems clear that you are operating PRIMARILY from an "ego" and "self-absorbed" perspective. You are considering only your own needs with regard to your family interactions, and not practicing any kind of external consideration.

I am constantly trying to find ways to communicate with them in a "non-threatening" manner....

As long as you continue to try and "communicate with them" about issues they do not wish to consider, you will continue to be "threatening" to them. So stop doing it. Confine your conversations with them to innocuous, non-threatening matters, whenever possible.

I feel a division occurring and they need to figure out where they are on the Knowledge cycle and how far they want or don't want to travel it.

As the C's constantly remind us, it is not STO to determine the needs of others. When you speak of what they "need", you are really speaking of your own "need" -- your own desire to have those around you share your current world view. You are only considering yourself, and not respecting the free will of your family members.

Practicing Exeternal Consideration and Strategic Enclosure is something we have all had to learn to do. It is difficult at first, but becomes easier with practice. Other forum members can offer advice on difficult-to-deal-with situations as they come up, but you must first get the point of grasping WHY it is necessary and what it really IS. It is not a matter of simply "modifying" what you wish to say to them about what you are learning, or trying to make it "softer"; it is a matter of STAYING SILENT.

 

[Buddy]

Hi mach66;

In addition to Pob's pointing to External Consideration, it may also be critical for you to implement a Strategic Enclosure:

http://www.cassiopedia.org/glossary/Strategic_enclosure

...and Mr. Premise's helpful paraphrase here:
http://www.cassiopaea.org/forum/index.php?topic=10542.msg68479#msg68479


In addition, and in case you have not already done so, I highly recommend the beginning information relating to psychology that concerns disassociation and narcissism and the negative introject. It will help you better understand not only yourself, but what's going on in the minds of others as well, as determined by observation of the behavior patterns that you will learn to recognize.

 

[mach66]

Pepper Fritz,
I wanted to respond to each of your posts individually, but I think they are all encompassing and I can respond to all of them with a single string of response. Unfortunately you mis-interpreted my post, or rather read more into it than was there. this is not your fault as I see what was written by me could be taken as you took it. I did learn from the last session and I do not talk about my wife's or my families Christian beliefs with them and I do not discuss my beliefs with anyone in the family. My father even tried to understand what I believe the other day and I refused to go into it. I told him I had my own beliefs based on knowledge I have gained from extensive research and that it would do no good to discuss it as our beliefs are different and the conversation would only result in a debate of differences.

The reason I wrote that they refuse to crack a single book or check one fact is due to the opposite of what you think. The situation is just like the one I just described about my father. I get asked questions like "why don't you believe in religion?" "How could your Jesus be the same Jesus as our Jesus if you don't believe every word in the Bible?" "What makes you think there are inconsistencies in the Bible?, Our pastor assures there are no inconsistencies" etc.. I simply say based on my own research and reading of materials, and research of others, I have come to understand that there are truths out there and all one has to do is open a book a do a little reading, a little research and the facts are pretty hard to deny.

I pretty much refuse to engage in any conversations about religion or beliefs.. If they are going to ask me questions, I will answer. I just find it frustrating to be told I am wrong, yet they won't go and try to check one fact, one piece of literature other than the "Almighty Word" "The Truth".

Hopefully this clears things up a little?

Peace,
Mach66

 

[seek10]

I pretty much refuse to engage in any conversations about religion or beliefs.. If they are going to ask me questions, I will answer. I just find it frustrating to be told I am wrong, yet they won't go and try to check one fact, one piece of literature other than the "Almighty Word" "The Truth".

Hopefully this clears things up a little?

Peace,
Mach66

Hi Mach66, Many of us here has gone through the stages you are facing currently. Personally i have been through this for years , often explaining truths ( what we discuss here) only as a response to asked question , only to be secretly ridiculed despite the proof. I often found my self a odd person, even when truth is clearly in my favour. fighting with General law (belief system ) is hitting the head with mountain. So don't take it personally. More over, It is our mechanical unconscious behavior that wants to talk about the subjects we like and we thought we figured it out . Instead of trying to explain to others, watch your on thoughts and minds that wants to go out there and shout about the truth and wake every body up and feel grand satisfaction out of it (feeding ). That tells a lot.

as many mentioned you may want to read through the concepts of 'external considering', 'strategic enclosure' . You also wants to look at the threads in work and family situations threads, which will tell a quite a lot of stories like that.

 

[mach66]

Sorry to cut things short on my last post, I was called to dinner - mmmm Ribs!
My wife just returned from a weekend woman's retreat with her church. WE just had a really nice discussion considering how rocky things have been lately. I asked her many questions about her weekend and what took place there etc. I showed genuine interest and listened intently to all that she had to say. I still go to church with her and the kids and I think my wife and I have found that ground on which we can both stand and respect each other's "belief space". I even agreed to go to a marriage workshop a few weeks ago that was held at a church and all the information was extremely Christian based. When my wife told me about it, I asked her if the event was a religious thing? She said no and I trusted her. Then a week later, I asked where it was being held at? She said a church. I said " I thought this wasn't a Christian thing?" She said "I don't think it is, I think it is just being held at a church." I asked for the name of the main speaker. She told me his name and I went and did a search and discovered his whole "gig" was Christian based psychology. I felt a little betrayed as my wife knew exactly what this was and what we were going to. I still agreed and although we weren't speaking as we entered the doors, we left and had communications occurring for the first time in quite a while (weeks). I believe this was due to my wife reaching a little more understanding of our circumstance as my thoughts and feelings were the same entering as leaving. If a Christian based event had a positive effect on my wife, I am all for it and what works best for her, works best for her.

I hope this shows that I am not combatant at all about religion and I am very tolerant and accepting of the fact that my family has chosen Christianity as their belief system. I am a strong believer that everyone has the right to travel any path they choose and no one else has the right to intervene with that path. I guess that is why I get frustrated when "they" try to tell me I am wrong in my beliefs and hopefully I will be saved once again someday. Knowing I have done a lot of reading from a lot of different sources to gain my perspective and having someone tell me I am wrong when they have not done any research at all tends to rub my feathers the wrong way. I suppose that is an Ego based emotion I need to learn to get rid of.

I am leaving for two months on Tuesday. I am starting a new career in order to re-invent myself to be able to cope with the collapsing economy. I just finished trucking school and begin my 2 month training which means I will be on the road for 2 months straight. Hopefully I will have a few nights home here and there. This will however, finally give me the time to settle into In Search of the Miraculous. I has started to read it and got about 30 pages in, then started trucking school. I had no idea how much time school would absorb of my at home time. I have spent most my other free time trying to figure out how to not lose our house. Any free computer time I have had recently has been spent at S.O.T.T. as that is where I prefer to get my news. This is the first time I have been to the forum in quite a while. I did get a hare drive for my lap top and a wireless account so I can stay in touch with my family via Skype so the kids could actually see my face while talking to them and so I can continue my research and stay connected with you "sane" people.

With all that said, I think the main question from my first post was kind of lost. Has anyone else experienced a variability in shared realities? I do understand that when one begins "The Work" their views and understanding of the underpinnings of reality will differ from those they share reality with. What I don't understand is why it seems that certain people in my life seem to create alternate realities of a particular situation almost on the fly. I don't understand how someone could make up something involving me and turn right around and repeat it to me and expect me to accept it as reality?

As a strange hypothetical, let me give this example. There are 3 people. One of them pulls out a gun and shoots one of the others, then hands the gun to the third person and says why'd you shoot him? Then when the third person says, I didn't shoot him, you did. The first person begins to say, No you did I saw you etc. then becomes enraged, confrontational and tries to force the third person into believing that they actually did the shooting.

Although no guns or deaths have occurred, this is the type of weirdness I have been experiencing. I have been told that I have done things that I know Darn well I didn't do, especially when only 5 minutes have passed by. My mom did this to me last night. She did something, then turned around and accused me of doing it and fully expected me to accept the fact that I did it. She even repeated it this morning and it turned into a very bad situation with me calling her "insane" which I feel terrible about. I truly felt like I was under a bizarre attack and my sanity was being tested.

I recall coming across a posting here on the forum somewhere Laura was talking about someone having a different account of something that had happened in the past and she knew she (Laura) was right and accurate about her account. Someone else posted they had the same experience. Well the weird thing is when I was 6 months old I got the Mumps and had to be submerged in bath full of ice and water. My mom has told me and others this story several times. A few visits ago at my mom's, I brought this story up. All of a sudden, her story changed and I never had the Mumps, she thinks it was Chicken pocks, which I know it wasn't because I have never had the Chicken Pocks and once while having some tests done at a Hospital, I asked about getting Chicken Pocks as an adult and I was told I still had plenty of Tiders and couldn't get them.
My mom also said I wasn't put in a bath full of ice. I have been telling this story all throughout my life to people when talking about child hood diseases based on the fact that my mom has told this story to me at least 10 times.

My mom is very young, she had me when she was 16, so I know she has all of her faculties. Because of the posting I had read, I was going to test her this weekend and ask about it once again to see if her story was the same as last time, or reverted back to the original?? Unfortunately things went south before I could get around to it.

Well that's about it..

Peace, and thanks for the replies, I truly appreciate any and all responses,
Mach66

 

[PepperFritz]

Unfortunately you mis-interpreted my post, or rather read more into it than was there. this is not your fault as I see what was written by me could be taken as you took it. I did learn from the last session and I do not talk about my wife's or my families Christian beliefs with them and I do not discuss my beliefs with anyone in the family.

Okay, I see. My apologies. So it seems that you have succeeded in the first step of building a Self Enclosure, which is to stop initiating conversations/interactions about your esoteric endeavours. So far so good.

I get asked questions like "why don't you believe in religion?" "How could your Jesus be the same Jesus as our Jesus if you don't believe every word in the Bible?" "What makes you think there are inconsistencies in the Bible?, Our pastor assures there are no inconsistencies" etc.. I simply say based on my own research and reading of materials, and research of others, I have come to understand that there are truths out there and all one has to do is open a book a do a little reading, a little research and the facts are pretty hard to deny. I pretty much refuse to engage in any conversations about religion or beliefs.. If they are going to ask me questions, I will answer.

Okay, so you're having difficulty with the next step of Self Enclosure, learning to recognize when you are being "baited" and learning not to take the bait. You are at the point now where you are prepared to stay silent and not directly impose your views on others, but you are NOT prepared to stay silent when others ask you direct questions about your beliefs. You feel that you still need to be "true to yourself", and therefore stand your ground in being "different" from those around you. Even if you refuse to argue and/or engage in a discussion (like you did with your father), you are still making a very strong statement: I'm not like you, i'm different. It is very understandable that you would feel that way. However, it is not good strategy. It is still perceived as a threat that must be attacked.

Stay with me here, because this is rather subtle, but it's a subtlety that you will need to learn in order to create an environment in which you are not constantly under attack by your family over your esoteric work: The next step in building a Self Enclosure is learning to not only be silent, but also SECRETIVE; to not only avoid certain kinds of discussions, but to DEFLECT and even MISLEAD others away from a perception of yourself as different, and therefore a threat.

This means actively playing down the "difference" others perceive in you, creating a false perception in its place, one that will deflect attention and focus away from you. It is a subtle skill that only comes with practice. Most most of all it requires the ability to sublimate your own emotional need to to be seen and recognized as WHO YOU ARE, in the interest of creating a safe environment in which you can pursue your esoteric work without interference.

Are you following what I'm saying? I'm guessing that it probably evokes an emotional resistance in you, which is to be expected. But these are issues that you will have to start considering and coming to terms with if you are to achieve your goal and reduce the environment of stress and attack that you are having such a hard time dealing with.

I just find it frustrating to be told I am wrong, yet they won't go and try to check one fact, one piece of literature other than the "Almighty Word" "The Truth".

I understand your frustration. Perhaps you need to look at it in a different way, in order to get beyond those feelings of anger and frustration: If a child were to tell you how "wrong" you are to not believe in the existence of Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny, you would not become "frustrated" with him and his refusal to "read up" on the subject. You would recognize that you are dealing with someone who is at a far different maturity and knowledge level than you, and know that "eventually", they will grow beyond their current beliefs and share your adult reality. Perhaps you could try to have the same "tolerant" attitude and perspective towards your family members, who are simply at very different stages in their learning.

Perhaps if you were to describe specific situations/conversations that come up between you and your family members, that lead to these feelings of frustration and overt "attacks", other forum members could offer practical suggestions about how to deal with them in terms of building a Self Enclosure, based on their own experiences....

 

[mach66]

Stay with me here, because this is rather subtle, but it's a subtlety that you will need to learn in order to create an environment in which you are not constantly under attack by your family over your esoteric work: The next step in building a Self Enclosure is learning to not only be silent, but also SECRETIVE; to not only avoid certain kinds of discussions, but to DEFLECT and even MISLEAD others away from a perception of yourself as different, and therefore a threat.

This means actively playing down the "difference" others perceive in you, creating a false perception in its place, one that will deflect attention and focus away from you. It is a subtle skill that only comes with practice. Most most of all it requires the ability to sublimate your own emotional need to to be seen and recognized as WHO YOU ARE, in the interest of creating a safe environment in which you can pursue your esoteric work without interference.

Are you following what I'm saying? I'm guessing that it probably evokes an emotional resistance in you, which is to be expected. But these are issues that you will have to start considering and coming to terms with if you are to achieve your goal and reduce the environment of stress and attack that you are having such a hard time dealing with.

Pepper Fritz - Thank you so much for that! I needed to hear that and now I need to go back and re-read the strategic enclosure thread and also thanks Buddy for the links (didn't forget about your post), it has been quite a while since I read it. Yes I do follow you very much.. Now I can understand why the Mystery Schools became "the Mystery Schools"

Peace,
Mach66

 

[Buddy]

I think the main question from my first post was kind of lost. Has anyone else experienced a variability in shared realities? I do understand that when one begins "The Work" their views and understanding of the underpinnings of reality will differ from those they share reality with. What I don't understand is why it seems that certain people in my life seem to create alternate realities of a particular situation almost on the fly. I don't understand how someone could make up something involving me and turn right around and repeat it to me and expect me to accept it as reality?

There are a coupla' possible solutions available that may or may not work for you.

If you study and clearly understand the Strategic Enclosure and PepperFritz's detailed explanation (especially the part you quoted), you may not need these.

Having said that, all your examples have the same common denominator, yet the significant ones are the example of 'chicken pox' which involves your far past, and the reality flip 5 minutes after an event transpires.

First, if there is something that is important enough to you about something in your past, do your own investigation of medical records, doctor interviews or whatever is necessary to determine, for yourself, what the reality is. Otherwise, any discussions or arguments should have no more weight than someone passing along hearsay. What someone says can be accepted, but with an open mind.

Second, regarding the '5-minute reality flip': Concentrated attention is required. If it is possible to predict a particular situation or type of situation that might be flipped on you, then make the effort to 'burn into your mind' something about the actual situation that will become so easy to remember and to 'remind' the other person of, that it can't be contested very effectively. (easier said than done).

As an example: every friday I have to visit my local department of labor to turn in a slip in order to collect my tiny unemployment check the next week. When I arrive, I am as observant as I can be, burning in my mind something about that visit so that I know I will remember it well. That way I never have to wonder if I remembered my responsibility.
Not only that, but if the clerk doesn't enter it into the computer on time, I can always say something like "But I turned it in, remember? Sally was the one at the desk, wearing that pretty white blouse with the ruffle thing and as I handed it to her, the supervisor, Mr. John Doe was showing something to her on the computer. She was probably distracted and just doesn't remember". Well, Mr. John Doe is going to remember because he had to take time out of his work to train her on something, and that was what was going on when I came up to the desk.

Get the picture? Maybe something here will help, but again, if you follow the advice already given, you may not have to use such techniques.

--for what it's worth.

 

[Gimpy]

With all that said, I think the main question from my first post was kind of lost. Has anyone else experienced a variability in shared realities? I do understand that when one begins "The Work" their views and understanding of the underpinnings of reality will differ from those they share reality with. What I don't understand is why it seems that certain people in my life seem to create alternate realities of a particular situation almost on the fly. I don't understand how someone could make up something involving me and turn right around and repeat it to me and expect me to accept it as reality?

I noticed this kind of 'disconnect' with my family, especially my mother, when going through pre-teen years. She would say horrible things to me, then, in the same conversation, sum up by saying "I don't know why you don't have more confidence in yourself." Observing this carefully from this time I knew if I wanted to get out of my family and get counseling, I had to put up with it.

In college, and after much counseling, I was driving to get a hair cut with my mother and once again, she basically criticized and verbally destroyed my life, from my choices in friends, to work, to the man I was currently dating, summing up word for word "I don't know why you don't have more confidence in yourself." The difference that time? I laughed at her, and pointed out what she'd said.

Without missing a beat, she denied she'd said anything.

I didn't let it go this time, and pointed out to her all that she'd said, including her last line, and said "With that kind of message, how could anyone have self confidence?"

She said nothing, and didn't even react.

But she never said anything like that again, and still to this day does not remember those conversations. The conclusion I came to at the time, was that it was some kind of unconscious repeating of something said to my mother by her mother, in a bid to keep me 'in my place'. I have not pressed the point or brought it up again.

Another unconscious mechanism my parents enforced together was the concept that as my parents, they had the right to beat me, even kill me, if that was what they wanted to do to me. This was a theme from earliest childhood, that I learned later in life to be an empty threat one second, and a precursor to being hit at other times. Finally sick and tired of it, I announced to them both one night that if either one of them raised a hand to me again, it would mean jail. It took all my strength to say that, but when I did say it, it was with the certainty that I would go through with what I said.

That ended that particular threat, for one main reason: I was of age to follow through and make charges stick. As a teen, this was not true, and resistance was met with violence.

I've lived with two sets of parents: One set that does care for me and an unconscious pair that are wounded, angry animals. I've accepted both sets, while never losing sight of the seconds tendency to scratch at every perceived 'weakness'. As the years have passed, they've all mellowed, but in all interactions, I'm cautious.


What I'm saying, is it is possible your mom really remembers events differently. It doesn't mean she's doing it on purpose, necessarily. From what you've said, it could be combination of both factors: she's used to being the main force in your life as your mother and can't stand that you're questioning her actions(Mother-right), and unconsciously she's trying to keep you a child and make sure you 'believe the right things.' Often to do the second, she'll repeat what she wants you to believe until she's confident that's how you see it, like a broken record.

Arguing what reality is to your mom may not work. It may be possible to find the 'turn off switch' later, but right now it might be better to let her alone. :/

Removing yourself from her environment may be one of the least provocative means to 'reset' the situation.

Just my two cents.

 

[nicklebleu]

Thanks for all your input into this thread - and mach66, let me assure you, that you are not alone in this quest.

I went through much the same - and still am. First, having learned all that new exciting stuff - the TRUTH - I bolted into my relationship trying to make my wife read all that stuff - and agree with me. Predictably enough - she wasn't interested. It took a while for me to stop persisting and I think, I may have done irreparable damage in not exercising external consideration and strategic enclosure. Now I have learned that to some extent - and life has become more difficult. In my case, this has to do with a multitude of programs, which I have noticed so far: "to be an intelligent being", "to be right about something", "not to lie", "not to let lies uncovered", ... etc. I guess, that some form of Christian upbringing is reflected by some of these programs. It is interesting in this respect to remember what G. said about being sincere/ insincere:

As I have said already, one of the first demands is sincerity. But there are different
kinds of sincerity. There is clever sincerity and there is stupid sincerity, just as there is
clever insincerity and stupid insincerity. Both stupid sincerity and stupid insincerity
are equally mechanical. But if a man wishes to learn to be cleverly sincere, he must be
sincere first of all with his teacher and with people who are senior to him in the work.
This will be 'clever sincerity.' But here it is necessary to note that sincerity must not
become 'lack of considering.' Lack of considering in relation to the teacher or in
relation to those whom the teacher has appointed, as I have said already, destroys all
possibility of any work. If he wishes to learn to be cleverly insincere he must be
insincere about the work and he must learn to be silent when he ought to be silent with
people outside it, who can neither understand nor appreciate it. But sincerity in the
group is an absolute demand, because, if a man continues to lie in the group in the
same way as he lies to himself and to others in life, he will never learn to distinguish
the truth from a lie.
Ouspensky, ISOTM

And also - as many have said before in this forum - the more you progress, the more attacks you will be subjected to. And as Laura has pointed out - they tend to come from the sources closest to you. I personally haven't really found the solution to this problem yet, but self-observation and to try to avoid the difficult situations in the first place (like Buddy suggested) will make things easier in the long run - or so I hope!

 

[Laura]

With all that said, I think the main question from my first post was kind of lost. Has anyone else experienced a variability in shared realities? I do understand that when one begins "The Work" their views and understanding of the underpinnings of reality will differ from those they share reality with. What I don't understand is why it seems that certain people in my life seem to create alternate realities of a particular situation almost on the fly. I don't understand how someone could make up something involving me and turn right around and repeat it to me and expect me to accept it as reality?

Sorry for being late checking on this thread, but I understood exactly what you were talking about in the first post. I lived that experience for quite a few years after the initiation of the Cs communication. And it got weirder and weirder. All of us involved in the experiment at the beginning had these kinds of experiences to one degree or another and a lot of it is actually chronicled in the sessions here and there. We used to joke that we had to "raise the bizarre bar" every week or so. It was like reality was constantly morphing to try to continue to hide something. Things would disappear, reappear, synchronicities all over the place, conversations would be changed sometimes in mid-sentence, and yeah, I thought I was losing it! It took some real concentration to hold on to myself on that roller-coaster ride!

Then, after I met Ark (or he "found me", more precisely), things really ramped up. There was a whole circle of us involved and sometimes we, ourselves, could not believe the level of strangeness.

Then, later, much of this strangeness manifested on our online discussion groups and most members of QFS have been through it.

I wonder now if it was an effect of each of us being "re-tuned" to our proper reality timeline or something like that and a whole lot of static was involved in "changing channels"?

 

[dant]

I have pretty much gone through (and still going through)
some of what members are reporting here in regards to
`external considering', `strategic enclosures', etc, and
sometimes find it difficult to overcome `attacks', but more
specifically, to abandon my `gotta save them' ego, esp.
if it involves those closest to me. At some point, I just
"let it go", and do not even broach/open "the subject".

What I have been able to do is to constantly remind myself of:
(1) Free will
(2) Like attracts Like (polarity) [Opposites are like "vomit"]
(3) Individual's karma (life lessons tailored to each person)
(4) Sincere contacts initiated by those actually DOing
'the work' as this forum clearly demonstrates.

Since those that I have already `broached the subject' to, the
"damage" was already done. At this point, I have 'moved on',
but sometimes, one may ask questions regarding 'the work'

Through observation, it may be possible to determine if an
"initiate" has 'done the work' by their actions (by what they
say and what they do), such as actually reading the recommended
books on `the subject' and/or 'talking the talk".

In regards to those contacting me, in asking questions, I generally
will not respond unless I am absolutely certain, the questioner is
`sincere' and versed in 'the work'.

 

[PepperFritz]

I just find it frustrating to be told I am wrong, yet they won't go and try to check one fact, one piece of literature other than the "Almighty Word" "The Truth"...

Further to this, I thought you might find this quote from Gurdjieff helpful and relevant:

M. called me a fool. Why should I be offended? Such things do not hurt me, so I don't take offense—not because I have no self-love; maybe I have more self-love than anyone here. Maybe it is this very self-love that does not let me be offended.
I think, I reason in a way exactly the reverse of the usual way. He called me a fool. Must he necessarily be wise? He himself may be a fool or a lunatic. One cannot demand wisdom from a child. I cannot expect wisdom from him. His reasoning was foolish. Either someone has said something to him about me, or he has formed his own foolish opinion that I am a fool—so much the worse for him. I know that I am not a fool, so it does not offend me. If a fool has called me a fool, I am not affected inside.

But if in a given instance I was a fool and am called a fool, I am not hurt, because my task is not to be a fool; I assume this to be everyone's aim. So he reminds me, helps me to realize that I am a fool and acted foolishly. I shall think about it and perhaps not act foolishly next time.

So, in either case I am not hurt.