Jordan Peterson on Relationships

HowToBe

The Living Force
This video reminds me of one of the "vignettes" in The Narcissistic Family, when a woman had not been communicating her wishes and preferences to her husband so that he could meet them and make her happy, and after some therapy she came up with the solution of putting sticky notes around to communicate those in a playful way.

His points about the difficulty and slowness of changing/guiding behaviors (ours or others). He uses couples for his example, but most of this applies to family and other live-together relationships especially, I think.


https://youtu.be/9VM1UA0pCMQ
 
Thanks for sharing!

This is one of my favorite videos of his. Specially the way he explains with some wit the silly ways we all constantly behave specially when in a relationship. I also like the way he doesn't polarize the blame on either but rather focuses on our own behaviors and our way to communicate as the way to achieve a functional relationship.

To me it speaks to this self observation, consideration of the other and their capacities and limitations. Considerstion for our own limitations and capacities. Letting go of the ego of holding on to our own self image and allow ourselves to become vulnerable by clearly communicating our inner world to the other.

As well as the difficulty and perseverance it takes to modify our own behavior. Which actually helps in creating realistic goals.

Thanks again!
 
Yes. I'm also reminded of the book "Crucial Conversations". It gives some advice for getting out of the "amygdala hijack" and into a meaningful dialogue with the other person.
 
Alejo said:
Thanks for sharing!

This is one of my favorite videos of his. Specially the way he explains with some wit the silly ways we all constantly behave specially when in a relationship. I also like the way he doesn't polarize the blame on either but rather focuses on our own behaviors and our way to communicate as the way to achieve a functional relationship.

To me it speaks to this self observation, consideration of the other and their capacities and limitations. Considerstion for our own limitations and capacities. Letting go of the ego of holding on to our own self image and allow ourselves to become vulnerable by clearly communicating our inner world to the other.

As well as the difficulty and perseverance it takes to modify our own behavior. Which actually helps in creating realistic goals.

Thanks again!

I absolutely agree! I also think he speak to our narcissistic tendency; when we forget to realize that our partner are not an extension of us, but a separate human being with their own weakness and failings. When we just expect our partners to know what we want and need, we are truly failing into arrogant behavior. I always say, relationships can be such a great tool for personal development if we stay conscious and aware of ourselves, since being in a relationship can, at times, bring out the worst in us.
 
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