Looking for an article on pathologic relationships

paralleloscope

The Living Force
And how to heal. It's for a situation where getting or recommending a book like 'women who love psychopaths' would be too much, but a smaller text would be welcomed, or at least that's how I read the signs. I've been searching but haven't been able to find a piece which shows the telltales of a manipulating narcissist predator and perhaps also reflects some hope and light on learning to trust oneself again. Any suggestions?
 
There comes this article to mind:

Devils In Disguise

And from the comment:

The following account is a heartfelt, personal, and dramatic illustration of psychopathy at work in a "normal" family situation. Many people will be able to identify with much, or even all of, this story and know from miserable but invaluable experience how just one solitary psychopath can victimize so many others, co-opt the legal and social systems and set up the primary victim to be the one with the problem. Vida's story of survival clearly reveals the insidiousness of psychopathy on the interpersonal level, and should leave us all with food for thought about the damage that can be wrought by more powerful psychopaths in positions of authority.
 
Thanks Gawan. The article doesn't quite mirror my friends situation as the narcissistic guy in question was of a milder narcissistic persuasion. She may be able to identify a few traits, but I seem to recall having read an article or two on the everyday mechanics and setups of narcissistic relationships which would fit better, OSIT. She is questioning how he could have read her so perfectly, setting her up to bleed her out and then subsequently suffering disbelief in that everything was a perfect lie, loosing faith in herself. I can't go into explaining about 4d vectoring, though have tried to give some perspective on narcissism in general and examples.
 
Have you told her to try re-direct will help her see/feel why and how this all happened. Maybe realize her mistakes so she can carry a bigger shield around by seeing how and why this happened...Maybe when she is done read her story with her and you can pause and point out what you see as your being is probably more advanced
 
Recommend to her the writings of Shari Schreiber - website: http://gettingbetter dot com
Her piece http://gettinbetter.com/casanova.html is useful, just say to her to replace the word borderline with narcissist. The discussion of narcissistic traits is very good.

Initially, you may be taken with his unique openness and vulnerability, since you haven't encountered this in other males you've known. It's refreshing to find a guy who doesn't censor his feelings/thoughts, and seems emotionally accessible! It's incredible that this man appears so completely without guile, he almost instantly puts you at ease and inspires your trust.

You're appreciated for your qualities and attributes, and admired/respected for the woman you've become. He's extremely attentive at first, and wants to be with you constantly--which is like music to your soul. As this courtship picks up speed, you feel fortunate to have found such a considerate, loving, thoughtful man--but just as you begin trusting that his pronouncements of love are genuine and start envisioning your future together--things change.

Casanova makes sure you know how grateful he is to have finally found you, because you're "like no other woman" he's ever known. His enthusiasm and glee seem authentic: One of my ex's would initially remark how great it was, that he'd finally met a female who was his "intellectual equal." This elicited my prophetic response; I hope that what you're loving now, you won't start despising, later. Yes, I'd had warning signals just like you--and foolishly put them aside. He'd just recently left a long-term marriage, and I knew better. While he had dated a few others in-between, my concerns about the wisdom of our timing, were always met with vehement assurances that he'd wanted someone like me, his "whole life!" Before long, I threw caution to the wind~ and it came back to bite me on the fanny.

Another very useful resource are the writings of Tara J. Palmatier, found at http://www.shrink4men dot com
She writes for males abused in pathological relationships, but her articles are easily interchangeable between sexes.
 
Hi parallel,

I don't know if it would qualify as an article but I found this topic about a real life situation that might be similar: Free will in a relationship which you could eventually print out for easier reading. It meets all of the requirements you initially stated, I think.

Here it is: http://cassiopaea.org/forum/index.php/topic,21786.0.html

Hope this helps a bit.
 
There's this which may be helpful:
http://www.sott.net/articles/show/245781-Recovery-from-Pathological-Relationships-Let-Go-or-Be-Dragged

There's previews/"Look Inside" a book on Amazon such as "Women Who Love Psychopaths" or "How to Stop a Dangerous Man Before You Get Involved" I think.
 
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