shadowsaround
Jedi
As usual working late threw my sleep schedule off again and I felt tired and was deciding if I wanted to take a nap or not. I felt low on energy and decided instead of taking a nap, I would try to sit in my recliner and meditate a bit to see if it would help clear my mind of some things. So I did and soon after I felt like I was lucid dreaming. It started off with an ex friend who had basically turned his back on me in a very harsh way who came to me and asked if I had read the Sunday paper. I told him "no I don't read the paper anymore". At this point it seemed that we where merely observing each other. I should note that for a few years after this friendship had ended I had very negative emotions concerning him. I hated him and what he had done but I had no knowing of why. I always felt that if we ran into each other I would probably kick his butt. I never did even though I had some opportunity's to do so. The dream continued for quite some time it seemed and it would flash from one scene to the next, kind of like and overview of the friendship and the good and bad times we had shared. I remember myself as kind of sitting there apart from my body just watching and observing his actions and the scene's that would come up. I never felt hatred or any of the past emotions I used to feel. Towards the end I told myself that perhaps it was best in the way it all happened. I told him that he had his way on his path and I had my way on my own path. I never said I forgave him but merely recognized the fact that we each had our own ways in life. I woke up after that and then the UPS guy dropped off my RO filtration system!
The only thing I could think of to bring this up was that last night while working I had a person I knew from my misguided days come up to me and tell me that he saw this person and that he was suffering from a bone spur and could hardly walk. I didn't really say anything about it as I felt it shouldn't really matter to me anymore what the ex friend did. I do feel that for the most part this part of me is resolved.
The only thing I could think of to bring this up was that last night while working I had a person I knew from my misguided days come up to me and tell me that he saw this person and that he was suffering from a bone spur and could hardly walk. I didn't really say anything about it as I felt it shouldn't really matter to me anymore what the ex friend did. I do feel that for the most part this part of me is resolved.
