Personal question on the right way to act for me

[Noctu]

If this post could be placed somewhere better, please go ahead and move it, moderators.

I have a personal question and I'm looking for some clues on how to handle this situation.

I'll try to sketch it very briefly and then ask my questions.

So, I ordered 17 magazines through a Dutch website. As I live in Belgium, the people from the Dutch website said they would refer my order to the Belgian branch, so there would be less mailing costs. Shipping from Belgium to Belgium is cheaper that from the Netherlands to Belgium. So far so good, and it even seems like they have an STO intention. Although you could argue that they were trying to control and interfere, and even that they wanted to be seen as good of friendly, maybe on a subconscious level, which would make their action STS.

Anyway...

A man of the Belgian branch then contacts me and says they're going to take care of the order. Apparently sent me 14 magazines in stead of 17. He forgot to add 3 magazines I ordered. So I sent him an e-mail saying that there are 3 magazines missing and that I'm happy to pay for all of the magazines (he first only charged me for the ones he had sent), adding my request that they take care of the maling costs of the 3 magazines, since I didn't think it was my responsibility that he forgot some and thus sent my order in two separate packages, making the mailing costs go up. If he hadn't forgotten and put all of the 17 magazines into one parcel, then the mailing costs would have been lower. I realise that sounds like blame and judgement, but it's also true, I guess.

Now, I'm aware that there might be some karma playing out here, because as an employee for a small business that also sends packages, I have forgotten to add some items as well on occasion, although I always do my best to fulfill the orders as perfectly as I can. I'm aware that there can be distractions and even attacks from STS beings while working. In any case, I felt the frustration and disbelief that our customers might have felt as well when they didn't get what they ordered.

But now, my question is: to balance this karma I think/feel I have: should I just pay the mailing costs of the second parcel as well? This doesn't seem fair to me, as the mistake could have been easily avoided by counting the magazines, etc. I also agreed to pay for the magazines and the mailing costs, assuming that they would be sent in one package, which they could have.

Now, making mistakes is only human and I have done it myself, so I don't blame the man for that. It's more that I have a feeling of injustice since he doesn't seem to take full responsibility for his error by charging me the mailing costs that he could have avoided. We have a saying that the customer is the king (klant is koning) so I think it's only right and it shows that you're serving your customers well if you don't charge for your mistakes.

I'm also aware that there might be some entitlement on my part. Or maybe I'm just digging too deep or looking to far or judging myself falsely. Since the C's said something about the fact that the saying in the Bible which says "Turn the other cheek" is programmation to let the STS being continue with their malicious acts, I'm more aware of not letting things slide so easily. However, this has cost me some energy and I must admit that I felt frustration, irritation and even anger. I am aware of the fact that these energies can serve as food for the STS beings, so I'm working on controlling and containing the emotions or letting them out in a healthy way.

Another question I have is: do these 'negative' energies always have the chance of being used as food by STS beings, or can I channel the energy of these emotions myself, for example by using the energy that's being/been released by working physically on something that needed to be done anyway and for which I seemed to lack the energy/courage, without letting my energy be food for STS beings?

I hope I'm making sense and that people can give me their honest feedback, which I welcome. We're all learning here, so I hope it's interesting for others as well.

 

[naorma]

What I would do in your situation: I would talk to them and find an agreement. Your point is quite understandable. Why should you pay more? On the other hand they were helping you safe some porto if I understand correctly. Just talking to people is helpful - at least sometimes.

 

[Noctu]

What I would do in your situation: I would talk to them and find an agreement. Your point is quite understandable. Why should you pay more? On the other hand they were helping you safe some porto if I understand correctly. Just talking to people is helpful - at least sometimes.

Yes, I have talked to the man of the Belgian branch and I have tried to find an agreement. I even proposed to come get the magazines myself when I was in the neighbourhood to meet them halfway. (their distribution center is in another city than mine and I visit that city sometimes), but they said that that was not possible. The Belgian and the Dutch branch have two different bank accounts, et cetera, so they're actually two different businesses.

So, yeah, the Dutch branch was helping me to save some porto, but their intention gave the opposite result, because the total porto is now more than it would have been if the Dutch people had sent my order.

I'l give it another go to try and reach an agreement but it seems he's pretty stubborn.

 

[Chetofloj]

If this post could be placed somewhere better, please go ahead and move it, moderators.

I have a personal question and I'm looking for some clues on how to handle this situation.

I'll try to sketch it very briefly and then ask my questions.

So, I ordered 17 magazines through a Dutch website. As I live in Belgium, the people from the Dutch website said they would refer my order to the Belgian branch, so there would be less mailing costs. Shipping from Belgium to Belgium is cheaper that from the Netherlands to Belgium. So far so good, and it even seems like they have an STO intention. Although you could argue that they were trying to control and interfere, and even that they wanted to be seen as good of friendly, maybe on a subconscious level, which would make their action STS.

Anyway...

A man of the Belgian branch then contacts me and says they're going to take care of the order. Apparently sent me 14 magazines in stead of 17. He forgot to add 3 magazines I ordered. So I sent him an e-mail saying that there are 3 magazines missing and that I'm happy to pay for all of the magazines (he first only charged me for the ones he had sent), adding my request that they take care of the maling costs of the 3 magazines, since I didn't think it was my responsibility that he forgot some and thus sent my order in two separate packages, making the mailing costs go up. If he hadn't forgotten and put all of the 17 magazines into one parcel, then the mailing costs would have been lower. I realise that sounds like blame and judgement, but it's also true, I guess.

Now, I'm aware that there might be some karma playing out here, because as an employee for a small business that also sends packages, I have forgotten to add some items as well on occasion, although I always do my best to fulfill the orders as perfectly as I can. I'm aware that there can be distractions and even attacks from STS beings while working. In any case, I felt the frustration and disbelief that our customers might have felt as well when they didn't get what they ordered.

But now, my question is: to balance this karma I think/feel I have: should I just pay the mailing costs of the second parcel as well? This doesn't seem fair to me, as the mistake could have been easily avoided by counting the magazines, etc. I also agreed to pay for the magazines and the mailing costs, assuming that they would be sent in one package, which they could have.

Now, making mistakes is only human and I have done it myself, so I don't blame the man for that. It's more that I have a feeling of injustice since he doesn't seem to take full responsibility for his error by charging me the mailing costs that he could have avoided. We have a saying that the customer is the king (klant is koning) so I think it's only right and it shows that you're serving your customers well if you don't charge for your mistakes.

I'm also aware that there might be some entitlement on my part. Or maybe I'm just digging too deep or looking to far or judging myself falsely. Since the C's said something about the fact that the saying in the Bible which says "Turn the other cheek" is programmation to let the STS being continue with their malicious acts, I'm more aware of not letting things slide so easily. However, this has cost me some energy and I must admit that I felt frustration, irritation and even anger. I am aware of the fact that these energies can serve as food for the STS beings, so I'm working on controlling and containing the emotions or letting them out in a healthy way.

Another question I have is: do these 'negative' energies always have the chance of being used as food by STS beings, or can I channel the energy of these emotions myself, for example by using the energy that's being/been released by working physically on something that needed to be done anyway and for which I seemed to lack the energy/courage, without letting my energy be food for STS beings?

I hope I'm making sense and that people can give me their honest feedback, which I welcome. We're all learning here, so I hope it's interesting for others as well.

My three cents I would take it as something that can happen and would not give relevance to karma, STO or SAS.
These are things that sometimes happen

 

[naorma]

These are things that sometimes happen

Agreed!

 

[Noctu]

My three cents I would take it as something that can happen and would not give relevance to karma, STO or SAS.
These are things that sometimes happen

That's a reassuring thought, although I'm not sure if it's true or not. Where does the line between things that can happen and karma lie?

 

[Ina]

I presume magazine refers to a publication and not at bullet magazine, as the second meaning might have shipping paper work involved and more hassle.
For three magazines unless they are the size of Vogue Bridal Special, each, as I again, presume the delivery is by post, I would not put my conscience on trial. Even for a small business these costs are inevitable and should be budgeted for as incidental runing costs, which are also tax deductible. As no harm was done the karma should be balanced.

 

[Noctu]

I presume magazine refers to a publication and not at bullet magazine, as the second meaning might have shipping paper work involved and more hassle.
For three magazines unless they are the size of Vogue Bridal Special, each, as I again, presume the delivery is by post, I would not put my conscience on trial. Even for a small business these costs are inevitable and should be budgeted for as incidental runing costs, which are also tax deductible. As no harm was done the karma should be balanced.

It does refer to a publication to be read, yes. The delivery is by post indeed.

"As no harm was done the karma should be balanced" is an interesting quote!

Would there have been harm done if I, for example, has scolded them. Were is the line between hurting someone's feelings by, for example, saying: "It seems fairly easy to me to complete such a simple task" (which can be understood as: you're stupid/inadequate/... and doing harm? Is it the intentionality of it? Because it can be said with the intention to hurt or not.

And still, there are maybe un- or subconscious layers at work or aspects of us we're not (fully) aware of.

Do you only refer to physical harm or also emotional/psychological harm?

 

[Aeneas]

I think you are overthinking it. Mistakes happen as you yourself admit to in your own work. When you miss sending something in a parcel, you don't do it by intent, so no need to bring in STS or STO into it. It is just something which happens due to lapse of awareness, tiredness or just having one of those days. How you yourself react and deals with it, when a customer complains that you missed a parcel, is where the learning is. Now it is you as the customer and thus you get a new perspective from the other side so to speak.

A question is how much money does the shipping cost compared to if it had been shipped from Holland? Do you now have problems with paying the rent next week or will you have to go a couple of days without food? How much time have you invested in this issue and what is your time worth (easy calculation of number of hours spent thinking about this, including lost sleep, divided by the amount of extra postage)? Perhaps putting it into perspective will make you see it differently.

Now, I'm aware that there might be some karma playing out here, because as an employee for a small business that also sends packages, I have forgotten to add some items as well on occasion, although I always do my best to fulfill the orders as perfectly as I can.

Perhaps it will cost you the extra postage but because of the experience, you will gain a new perspective in your work and how customers might feel, justified or not, if a some items are missing. Thus there is a chance for learning something and thus to gain knowledge.

Since the C's said something about the fact that the saying in the Bible which says "Turn the other cheek" is programmation to let the STS being continue with their malicious acts, I'm more aware of not letting things slide so easily.

As you have presented it, there is nothing to say that it was a malicious act and I don't think your situation is quite what the C's were talking about.

We have a saying that the customer is the king (klant is koning) so I think it's only right and it shows that you're serving your customers well if you don't charge for your mistakes.

The company I worked for also had this slogan of the customer being the king, but it was just a nice sounding PR thing. In practice it was mostly not the case. It might well be right, but one can not demand that the other company follows this saying in practice. If the other company doesn't end up wanting to pay the postage, how much more energy are you going to spend in telling this story to every willing ear? Does it stand in comparison to the postage cost of 3 magazines?

I'l give it another go to try and reach an agreement but it seems he's pretty stubborn.

He may well be stubborn and perhaps he is at the same time a mirror.

 

[Noctu]

Great reply, Aeneas. Thank you. It's actually reflecting some of the thoughts I had about it.

He wrote to me that he sent the 3 magazines, without waiting to see if my payment arrives. The choice I can make now is to pay for the postage or not. Wondering what the best choice is. My intuition says pay it, even though it seems unfair. Is it karmically, in my specific case, better to pay or not? Because the lesson might be to stand up for myself. I don't know.

 

[Wandering Star]

For some people, what you are asking is probably so absurdly basic and of absolutely no importance that it is difficult to respond.

Are you going to measure your actions by a concept that you may not fully understand, namely, the concept of Karma?

Well, that is your decision.

 

[Noctu]

I know, right? Maybe I should go out and have some fun.

To have something to read when I return, is there anyone on the forum reading this who can help me to understand the concept of Karma? Or, are you saying that no one in 3D fully understands the concept of Karma?

 

[Ina]

It does refer to a publication to be read, yes. The delivery is by post indeed.

"As no harm was done the karma should be balanced" is an interesting quote!

Would there have been harm done if I, for example, has scolded them. Were is the line between hurting someone's feelings by, for example, saying: "It seems fairly easy to me to complete such a simple task" (which can be understood as: you're stupid/inadequate/... and doing harm? Is it the intentionality of it? Because it can be said with the intention to hurt or not.

And still, there are maybe un- or subconscious layers at work or aspects of us we're not (fully) aware of.

Do you only refer to physical harm or also emotional/psychological harm?

How do you thread the a niddle if the thread is unraveled? You cut the unraveled part. So let's get to the karma bit. Did you personally and directly give a 'salad' to any employee of the vendor company mentioning abcd about their level of professionalism or the complete lack of it vis a vis your order? If the answer is no then leave your karma alone. BTW splitting the hair now might scratch your karma the wrong way as you meddle more than your bit in the whole affair. ... the uninvited advocate sort of...

 

[Wandering Star]

I know, right? Maybe I should go out and have some fun.

To have something to read when I return, is there anyone on the forum reading this who can help me to understand the concept of Karma? Or, are you saying that no one in 3D fully understands the concept of Karma?

On the very top right page there is a magnifying glass.