Some musical stuff...

[ScioAgapeOmnis]

Hi Rabbit (away with the fairys artist person), I guess I'll get right to the point - I play piano, but I can't sing. So my dilemma right now is, how do I use my talent to help spread the word if I can't open my mouth without breaking windows? I'm wondering if there is any way I can maybe help you in your arrangements? For example, if you need a piano/organ/keyboard part or something, you could send an arrangement over and I can record a piano part on top of it, or I could send a piano arrangement and you could record guitar/vocals etc over that? Let me know what you think. If that's not something you'd wanna try, that's cool, I just thought I'd ask just in case. And I'm not saying that you need piano in your stuff, I love it just the way it is, but if you had some ideas about future projects that might involve piano, and you don't mind working long distance, then I'm game. Please feel free to email me if you're interested.

Other than that, I'm open for any kind of collaborative effort with anyone where a soundtrack may be needed, as long as it is designed to wake people up. I'm horrible at visual arts like graphic design and stuff like that, but I can do the musical stuff. And of course at no point will I ever ask for any kind of payment or anything like that - cuz that's not the point.

I posted 2 videos on youtube of me at work earlier today. I have an inferiority complex about my ability so I've never submitted anything I play for others to see on the internet (it's like a large crowd, pretty scary!). This time I had to do it because it was the only way I could get the video to a family member far away (with very little technology access, but with a friend who has the internet), and since I did, it kinda got the ball rolling in my head in terms of doing something useful with it rather than kinda pointless videos of just music without vocals, so that led me to make this post. Maybe nothing comes of it, but I'm open to anything.

These are the 2 videos:

_http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iAiZ5f6d7ic
_http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3dVfekiMns

Any kind of suggestions, ideas, criticism etc all welcome.

Edit: Oh yeah, Rabbit, I know what you mean when you say the PTB now know what you look like lol. I just had a bit of a chill run down my spine thinking about it, but let's hope the world doesn't get to the point where we have to seriously worry about that.

 

[Craig]

I posted 2 videos on youtube of me at work earlier today. I have an inferiority complex about my ability so I've never submitted anything I play for others to see on the internet (it's like a large crowd, pretty scary!). This time I had to do it because it was the only way I could get the video to a family member far away (with very little technology access, but with a friend who has the internet), and since I did, it kinda got the ball rolling in my head in terms of doing something useful with it rather than kinda pointless videos of just music without vocals, so that led me to make this post. Maybe nothing comes of it, but I'm open to anything.

For now, just want to say I can't believe you have an inferiority complex about such a superior playing ability!

 

[D Rusak]

Ditto here, though I don't play piano. That's something I often think about as well- here's this thing that I devote, oh, possibly half or more of my waking hours to, my career/vocation, and I don't know how to make it reflect my personal evolution, at least in terms of spreading any sort of message that people REALLY need to know. Of course being a musician allows me to interact with lots of other people, learning about myself and others, in a way that I probably wouldn't experience sitting in a cubicle.

I haven't really been interested in writing music, and have almost always approached music as being an interpreter rather than a creator. I think this is a big reason that I play classical music mostly (it's written down!). Anyway, every once in a while I mess around and make something. I have something that I'd contribute, a short little avant-garde, arabic-sounding ditty courtesy of my trumpet+audacity. I don't know if there's a way I could upload it somewhere. I'd be interested in collaborating as well- say someone has an idea for a video- could come up with musical ideas and/or contribute actual playing and recording on various instruments.

PS- Scio, have you tried using your voice for cancer therapy? (re: this thread: http://www.cassiopaea.org/forum/index.php?topic=2669)
(Hey- Seriously, sounds great!)

Re: Craig's comment- Scio, do you find yourself slipping into this self-deprecatory mode when it comes to your playing a lot? That's a program I often find myself running, and seems to be common among a lot of musicians and other artists. One can't take a compliment, since 1. there's always this drive to sound "better" 2. want to seem "modest" especially around other musicians, who may or may not be more "talented" 3. never feel that the playing is really special or good enough 4. people are just saying this to be "nice", or aren't really "informed" about the playing, etc. Some considering going on there?

 

[the rabbit]

WOW!
What can I say? Get the negative self suggesions of I cant , and the inferior BS out of the way. As far as singing goes , there are enough singers of big groups out there who if one heard them before the mix in studio or on stage would frighten you. Ive heard a few at close range who have seemingly the worse voices imaginable , or so it seems at the time.

When heard with the instruments etc, it becomes amazing and nothing short of magic.

What is singing?

The re part of D Russak´s post is so true , well it has been for me in the past. Denying ones talent which is a gift that comes from somewhere.

I cant . The imagination defeating the will. Self hypnosis.

Do you have self written pieces that you hum along to ? If so would like to hear them , regardless of what your thoughts are on them. Feel free to post them to info@awaywiththefairys.com . in fact send any loops , short pieces or whatever along would be interested to hear anything you have.

Cant say for definite that I can do anything with them , and of course if i have anything i feel maybe you could help me with i wont hesitate to ask.

Good to know there are a number of musicians on the forum , maybe we should have a section called sott musicians and we could swap info and maybe collab on some stuff.


For now "Keep on rocking in the not so free world.

 

[Alejo]

wow.! those are amazing skills man, now i was remembering watching you play that i was trying to learn Beethoven's moonlight sonata , in guitar using the tabs; sounds lovely , i know however that it has to be 100 times better in piano...(just a thought) , I'm probably not making any point, just wanted to say that you truly have a gift , and that i am a graphic designer (i was the one who posted the GiveBack Project) so if there's anything i could help you with gimme an e-mail , keep it up!

 

[Miss Isness]

Without ADSL videos are usually a bit too time consuming for me, but I couldn't resist at least getting a small taste. Sounds like you've acquired some classic jazz chops - wish I could play the piano like that! I like singing jazz tunes, and would be available for collaboration either long distance or face to face if circumstances should allow....

Unfortunately, jazz is often fiercely competitive, so I can understand why you might have an inferiority complex, and besides it's nearly impossible to achieve the musical heights of the real heavy weights when you're tied down by a regular 9-5 job. The good news is that often times what's lacking in technique and theoretical knowledge can be more than compensated for with enough heart - at least that's how I see it.

 

[ScioAgapeOmnis]

Rabbit, thank you, I will see if I can come up with anything interesting to send.

Of course being a musician allows me to interact with lots of other people, learning about myself and others, in a way that I probably wouldn't experience sitting in a cubicle.

Well, I spend most of my time in a cubicle and if there's an environment that promotes a sort of deranged and artificial reorganization of priorities, it's that. It's like watching a bunch of mental patients in a small room get excited about the most trivial and pointless things in their immediate surroundings, as if those things were the very meaning of life.

If you put someone in a tiny room for life, eventually they'll be driven to insanity, but they won't know it - they'll start laughing hysterically at nothing, they will get obsessive and attached to things like a light bulb or something, and their life will revolve around only the objects in that room which become all that matters to them. They won't even know that there's anything more to life than that. That's what this environment seems to have done to people.

Of course, telling them that they're trapped in this insane artificial construct of an existence is as useless as telling mental patients that they are insane when they worship their left pinky as God. And as for anyone that can possibly put people into such an asylum, and institutionally brainwash them that it is good and normal and they should enjoy it and pretend it's exactly what life is all about, well, that's a monster. It's a self-perpetuating system so psychopaths leave it to those who are already brainwashed to brainwash any newcomers. These people spend years and years in this asylum, their lives are empty shells, and then they retire, and they are nothing but shells going to their deaths, even though they died long ago. Frankly I find some amazing lessons in this environment, it's just very hard if not impossible to completely be unaffected by such consistent daily brainwashing, even if you do try to keep a conscious strategic enclosure.

Re: Craig's comment- Scio, do you find yourself slipping into this self-deprecatory mode when it comes to your playing a lot? That's a program I often find myself running, and seems to be common among a lot of musicians and other artists. One can't take a compliment, since 1. there's always this drive to sound "better" 2. want to seem "modest" especially around other musicians, who may or may not be more "talented" 3. never feel that the playing is really special or good enough 4. people are just saying this to be "nice", or aren't really "informed" about the playing, etc. Some considering going on there?

Yeah that seems about right. I guess it's like you know that if people compliment you, somebody will be resentful or jealous of you, and you don't want people to feel resentful towards you, so you shy away from any kind of exposure or any acknowledgement by others simply because you don't want people to think bad things about you just because of that.

Same thing with money - I have a serious program/aversion to making money. People are generally nice to you if they think that you are worse off than they are - whether it is less money, less talent, less popular, uglier, whatever. But people's attitude changes when they suddenly see that you're making more money or have some talent that they don't have and are recognized for it, etc. I know that very well because I have experienced it a lot - and as a kid you just want people to like you, you just want to be friends and get along with others whether it is at home or at work or anywhere, you don't want to make enemies and constantly be a target for snide remarks and all that stuff simply by being better at something than someone else.

So you develop a program to never allow yourself to succeed, never allow yourself to be better than others, or to make more money, or to do anything that would bring you any kind of recognition or attention, since with it will come all kinds of hate and resentment. It's a horrible program, but it's there like a ball and a chain, and I am sure I'm not the only one with it. In fact, the corporate environment is probably full of such people, and why, because this program is *EXACTLY* why I am a computer programmer working in a cubicle in the first place. I'm too terrified to use my talent to make money and (god forbid) get any kind of recognition or popularity, so I keep it as a small side gig while I gladly subject myself to this corporate hell.

And even there if I mention that I have another job playing piano, people get jealous because suddenly this corporate job is not all you can do, and suddenly people who were very friendly before become anything but. And frankly that drives me nuts and makes me want to crawl into a hole and pretend I never said anything - why do I have to be the subject of hate just by being good at something!?! And all it takes is a few particularly nasty experiences in childhood to lock something like this in your mind. Being good at ANYTHING = bad. Money = bad. Success = bad. And despite all your efforts to the contrary, you are still completely a slave to that program, and even though you *think* you are just horrible at making money or just not good at anything, that's not true at all. You are subconsciously diverting/derailing yourself and intentionally (though not necessarily consciously) messing things up for yourself, doing anything and everything to avoid any kind of success in anything, without even realizing that you're doing it. How many people have a talent that they don't even know about? What if we ALL have a talent(s) and it's just a matter of

I'm now thinking that maybe my problem is not even laziness, maybe it's precisely that program and perhaps others like it. I mean, it can't be lazy if I am so happy to suffer and do things I don't like in an environment that is bound to drive me to the last vestiges of insanity, and doing them a LOT, so much that I barely have time to do or think about anything else lately. That's not lazy, that's crazy. And I know I'm onto something here because my hands are shaking as I'm writing this. Something in me clearly does not want to be seen, or acknowledged, or even considered.

I mean, who wouldn't want to do what they love full time? I know I can never be a good programmer, but I do know that if I can dedicate myself full time to piano, there's no limit because I absolutely love it, that's where my heart is. But the possibilities of that are paradoxically terrifying, so I end up doing what I don't care for and can never be good at as a result.

Any thoughts on how to approach and tackle something like this are welcome, and I hope others, if they have this program, can overpower it, because it really really can absolutely ruin your entire life, very easily, and you won't even notice your life slip away until it's all gone and utterly wasted. Whoever said that we are our biggest enemies was absolutely not kidding. :|

 

[Miss Isness]

So you develop a program to never allow yourself to succeed, never allow yourself to be better than others, or to make more money, or to do anything that would bring you any kind of recognition or attention, since with it will come all kinds of hate and resentment. It's a horrible program, but it's there like a ball and a chain, and I am sure I'm not the only one with it. In fact, the corporate environment is probably full of such people, and why, because this program is *EXACTLY* why I am a computer programmer working in a cubicle in the first place. I'm too terrified to use my talent to make money and (god forbid) get any kind of recognition or popularity, so I keep it as a small side gig while I gladly subject myself to this corporate hell.

And even there if I mention that I have another job playing piano, people get jealous because suddenly this corporate job is not all you can do, and suddenly people who were very friendly before become anything but. And frankly that drives me nuts and makes me want to crawl into a hole and pretend I never said anything - why do I have to be the subject of hate just by being good at something!?! And all it takes is a few particularly nasty experiences in childhood to lock something like this in your mind. Being good at ANYTHING = bad. Money = bad. Success = bad. And despite all your efforts to the contrary, you are still completely a slave to that program, and even though you *think* you are just horrible at making money or just not good at anything, that's not true at all. You are subconsciously diverting/derailing yourself and intentionally (though not necessarily consciously) messing things up for yourself, doing anything and everything to avoid any kind of success in anything, without even realizing that you're doing it. How many people have a talent that they don't even know about? What if we ALL have a talent(s) and it's just a matter of

Wow Scio sounds like you're getting a handle on a pretty nasty one - fear of envy. There's no doubt that envy wreaks all kinds of havoc, especially in a downwardly adjusted society where no one is free to realize their full potential except for psychopaths and those who cater to them. I know exactly how you feel. I made the mistake of giving a copy of my CD to a colleague who I used to work with in a corporate environment. Was that ever a bad move, and yet what's the point of making music if you can't share it with anyone.

As for making a living as a musician rather than working on a computer in a cubicle, I wonder if there's more than just programs holding you back. Most full time musicians I know either have lots of connections, and financial support, or are willing to live with a bare minimum of security and material comfort, and the ones that make it big are more like slaves than artists. They may not work in cubicles on computers, but there is always someone else deciding what they can and can't do. Touring musicians are often forced by managers to keep grueling schedules. Of course, there are some independent musicians who have made it, but they are few and far between.

If I were you, I'd try to combine my musicianship and computer skills to provide educational workshops, and/or private lessons to people interested in doing home studio recording/arranging/producing. That way you could be in control of your schedule, earn more per hour - giving yourself more time to practice and look for gigs, make useful contacts with other musicians, and develop new skills that could help you more easily realize your musical potential.

 

[AquariusRising]

Good Work ScioAgapeOmnis and you have nice chops to boot!

Here’s why I think so:

While listening to Black Orpheus, I was thinking, “he’s too right-hand heavy and he needs to solo less and start blocking-out some chords”, and almost on cue, you started blocking-out chords around 1:30 on the video. I thought, “YES, good job”!

A bit later, I was thinking, “he’s stuck on that same one volume, he needs to break it down a bit and soften up, and almost on cue again, you broke-down and softened up the volume. I thought to myself YES-YES because to me it showed you were playing in CONSCIOUNESS. You were AWARE of what you sounded like and made efforts to balance what you perceived as possible imbalances in your sound!

A brief comment about the stagefright complex: once while traveling in Greece, I met Jon Anderson of YES at the American Express standing in line to change money. We had a brief chat about music and I mentioned I had seen YES in the round playing to a crowd of 20,000, and what is it like to play in front of that many people – isn’t it frightening? He said, “Well, not really…it’s like anything else in life, you have to practice by playing in front of others, and if you are truly prepared musically, playing to 15 or 15,000 is the same. When we began playing to the bigger audiences we were prepared musically, and so in my mind I simply transformed the 15,000 into 15.”


All the Best with your Musical Aspirations!

 

[D Rusak]

So you develop a program to never allow yourself to succeed, never allow yourself to be better than others, or to make more money, or to do anything that would bring you any kind of recognition or attention, since with it will come all kinds of hate and resentment. It's a horrible program, but it's there like a ball and a chain, and I am sure I'm not the only one with it. In fact, the corporate environment is probably full of such people, and why, because this program is *EXACTLY* why I am a computer programmer working in a cubicle in the first place. I'm too terrified to use my talent to make money and (god forbid) get any kind of recognition or popularity, so I keep it as a small side gig while I gladly subject myself to this corporate hell.

And even there if I mention that I have another job playing piano, people get jealous because suddenly this corporate job is not all you can do, and suddenly people who were very friendly before become anything but. And frankly that drives me nuts and makes me want to crawl into a hole and pretend I never said anything - why do I have to be the subject of hate just by being good at something!?! And all it takes is a few particularly nasty experiences in childhood to lock something like this in your mind. Being good at ANYTHING = bad. Money = bad. Success = bad. And despite all your efforts to the contrary, you are still completely a slave to that program, and even though you *think* you are just horrible at making money or just not good at anything, that's not true at all. You are subconsciously diverting/derailing yourself and intentionally (though not necessarily consciously) messing things up for yourself, doing anything and everything to avoid any kind of success in anything, without even realizing that you're doing it. How many people have a talent that they don't even know about? What if we ALL have a talent(s) and it's just a matter of

Wow Scio sounds like you're getting a handle on a pretty nasty one - fear of envy. There's no doubt that envy wreaks all kinds of havoc, especially in a downwardly adjusted society where no one is free to realize their full potential except for psychopaths and those who cater to them. I know exactly how you feel. I made the mistake of giving a copy of my CD to a colleague who I used to work with in a corporate environment. Was that ever a bad move, and yet what's the point of making music if you can't share it with anyone.

As for making a living as a musician rather than working on a computer in a cubicle, I wonder if there's more than just programs holding you back. Most full time musicians I know either have lots of connections, and financial support, or are willing to live with a bare minimum of security and material comfort, and the ones that make it big are more like slaves than artists. They may not work in cubicles on computers, but there is always someone else deciding what they can and can't do. Touring musicians are often forced by managers to keep grueling schedules. Of course, there are some independent musicians who have made it, but they are few and far between.

If I were you, I'd try to combine my musicianship and computer skills to provide educational workshops, and/or private lessons to people interested in doing home studio recording/arranging/producing. That way you could be in control of your schedule, earn more per hour - giving yourself more time to practice and look for gigs, make useful contacts with other musicians, and develop new skills that could help you more easily realize your musical potential.

I think you really need to think about why you are doing music in the first place, and what you want to get out of it, more than just "a good feeling". In my own case (I have no idea if this is of any help, but I'll share it) I was offered a good full-time job in the sciences before I even stepped foot in college, provided I graduated in good standing of course. This was a little bit luck, a little bit merit/hard work, and a little bit happening to specialize in some up and coming fields at the right time. In college I went to school and studied both science and music. I was continuously encouraged to pursue the common-sense route, ie, not doing music as a full-time thing. In my case, I learned that I really was a person who was okay with the practical ramifications of a career choice in the arts. I really don't care to have a lot of physical things; I enjoy going to different places and interacting with different people all the time; and I loathe the steady schedule of a 9-5 job. So music made sense for me on multiple levels, even when others in the field encouraged me not to pursue it. And I'm pretty sure that choice has led to the various influences that have ended up in me here, in me checking out G and Laura and Mouravieff and so many others. But you need to see what will really help you evolve, I think. Maybe the day job will keep you in a good financial situation, so you can more easily access materials needed. Or, maybe pursuing music will allow you the time you might otherwise not have to research and read- not just music of course ; ). I *think* in my personal situation that has been the case. Again, each situation is different. And of course anything that I'm writing about "music" I think can be applied to anything in the arts, or any self-run business to an extent.

As far as teaching goes, as a pianist you really shouldn't have a huge problem getting a studio started, no matter where you are. Teaching is really an end in itself, and it stinks sometimes to have to bring money into it. I had a teacher once who never took payment for any student, as he had a teacher once who never charged him. Although, making a couple hundred G's a year probably allowed him to more easily provide others with this opportunity. In today's economic climate, being an artist probably ISN'T the wisest choice! Networking is a whole other thing, which I've never naturally been good at. It does provide an EXCELLENT opportunity to practice your external consideration skills, OSIT.

I'm young so I don't have a whole lot of experience to back me up, and I don't have a family to provide for at this point either, which allows me a great degree of flexibility. And I haven't "made it" by any means. These are just general observations I've had. In any event, it seems as though there's a strong self-sabotage program going on, and perhaps you should look at what your actual blocks to pursuing this thing might be, and what those ramifications are. You may choose any number of paths to take but it doesn't really sound like you are satisfied with your current situation.

The one main issue that never has been settled for me concerning music, though, is G's idea about "objective art". So much of what artists do have one effect on one person, and a completely different effect on others. In a way, I often feel, "what's the point?" about what I'm doing. I can't say that I've really played much music that's even come close to fulfilling this concept. The two things that have come closest to inducing a similar response among varied peoples that I've participated in are playing renaissance music on historical instruments, and playing traditional music from the Balkans. And even that isn't 100% consistent. But I suppose that's food for a different thread.....

 

[Z...]

WOW

I think you should immediately take that inferiority complex to the trash.
I am not only very impressed with your music but also the way you are playing, it looks like you are having a lot of fun

In any case, thumbs up :)

 

[Mr. Premise]

Very nice, SAO! I love those tunes from Black Orpheus, my favorite movie.

As a side note, when the camera panned around the place, I had to ask for the umpteenth time, "Why does every bar have to have a damn TV in it?" And with the volume on when you're playing. Oh, well...

 

[anart]

Very nice, SAO! I love those tunes from Black Orpheus, my favorite movie.

Ahh, it's all coming clear now - the real reason I wrote, over a year ago,

Oh, and, yes, I've been a devout disciple of the church of SAO for decades now...

=)

Thanks for letting us listen - it's great.

 

[manitoban]

Listened to your wonderful playing this morning while having my coffee - that was just great and made a nice start to the day! Thanks, SAO!

 

[ScioAgapeOmnis]

As for making a living as a musician rather than working on a computer in a cubicle, I wonder if there's more than just programs holding you back.

I don't have extensive experience in searching for gigs mostly because I've been lucky to have a few steady ones thus far, but from my limited experience in the last few years, I've never actually had any trouble finding them once I put in some active effort to do this. A lot of musicians do original stuff, and understandably, it's difficult to get gigs if you are an original artist. Or maybe they just limit themselves to a particular genre of music, which also limits where they can perform etc. I guess limits, for whatever reason, whether it be musical "pride", trying to be "unique", or any number of things, do get in the way, osit.

And while I may be wrong, but right now I honestly think all it takes is learning some popular songs that people like (preferably in different genres of music to keep your options open), and just seriously putting in the effort to get gigs. There are restaurants, country clubs, hotels, bars, all kinds of places that can be looked at. Not to mention, private parties, weddings, pre-wedding cocktail hours, and many other occasions/events. I know many musicians like to post an ad on the web or something and wait for business to come to them, or just pass out cards and hope somebody calls. But this is still passive effort. Personally, I've never found any trouble getting gigs by simply walking door to door offering my services directly face to face. I simply stopped doing it once I found steady ones, which really only took a few days to find. One thing that is very tempting for a lot of places is to get something for nothing, so I always offered to do a free gig as an audition. Very few places turned down such an offer, and even if they only planned to use the free ticket and then send me on my way, more often than not they would ask me to return (this time for money), if people's reaction was positive which would equal business for them.

So I think the key here is, once you are doing that free gig, to get people to like it. And frankly I think all that needs to be done is to have external consideration. Don't play only what you wanna play, how you wanna play it, etc. Don't wear clothes to make some personal "statement" and to be "different" etc. Play what people want to hear, be friendly, sociable, and approachable (and sincerely so). I only say that because musicians have a "culture" of sorts, and often they make themselves unapproachable because they can be so "different" from non-musicians - either in how they dress, behave, whatever. You may be the nicest person on the planet but if you have 350 piercings and a mohawk, that WILL turn a lot of people off, it just will.

But the downside, it takes active effort, you can't just sit in your room and send out resumes. At least that's been my experience thus far. And you know, most people who have like a birthday party or some other event don't know about going to some music website looking for musician ads. They would just see a musician in a restaurant and if they like them, that's it, that's the one they want - they have seen/heard exactly what they would be getting, there is no mystery or crossing your fingers that the musician is what he/she says. So while there may be a lot of competition, in some ways, there really is no competition at all. It's like impulse shopping - people will buy what they see right in front of them, even if there is a billion better and cheaper things on some store shelf far away. People don't want to go hunting around huge store shelves, they want it easy. So that's why I think "active effort" is so much more valuable in this business, for various psychological reasons etc.

Most full time musicians I know either have lots of connections, and financial support, or are willing to live with a bare minimum of security and material comfort, and the ones that make it big are more like slaves than artists.

Again, just from my experience, there is a lot to be said about impeccability here. When you say "more like slaves than artists" - is it because it's a LOT of effort for very little return? Why? Is it the right effort? Are they utilizing their energies efficiently and objectively? Or are they creating unnecessary roadblocks, whether through hubris or self-limitation or internal considering? Maybe they are simply doing something over and over that really doesn't work very well but they are not flexible or open so they just keep doing it? Is anticipation getting in the way? Or maybe they really are horrible musicians but everyone keeps telling them how great they are so they are under an illusion, and so keep attempting to do what they really should not even be doing in the first place? Maybe they have a romantic idea about their music, and so forget to treat and approach it like a business? It is very popular nowadays to describe someone as "an unemployed artist", it has an almost romantic quality to it. I honestly think that a lot of this could simply be a result of people's programming and internal consideration and illusions and wasting of energy as a result - and not simply because music or art is a horrible way to make money. Sometimes it may really be difficult and out of the artist's control, but I wonder how many of those reasons the artist CAN do something about, but often doesn't for whatever reason?

As a side note, when the camera panned around the place, I had to ask for the umpteenth time, "Why does every bar have to have a damn TV in it?" And with the volume on when you're playing. Oh, well...

Lol, you should see it during any important baseball or football game. It's a national obsession :|

And thank you all very much for all your comments, advice, suggestions, and experiences. Other than make me blush and make me battle my own self importance, it's a huge relief, because I know this forum is not in the business of promoting anyone's delusions, so if I didn't get booed here, then my fears are most likely unjustified. Also got some critical and helpful comments on youtube as well, which I'll put into practice.

And while Miss Isness may be right that my programs are not the only issue here, as long as they still remain an issue, I'll never really know for sure. So I'll work on those, and report back on the results. Church of SAO is down for repairs and renovation. The roof leaks, the walls have termites, and all the rituals and sacred rites somehow revolve around eating giant chocolate chip muffins with shots of espresso. Also our holy deity is Joe Pesci because as George Carlin says, unlike Yahweh, Joe can actually get things done, capiche? :)