Understanding half of what is being said

[andi]

Hi, there was a thing I wanted to bring forth some time ago. The thing is: I have problems really understanding what is sometimes being said here on the forum.
It is not a question of language knowledge or the lack of it, but context.
I rather think it is me that doesn't understand. In some of the posts I read, I have a hard time summarizing what is being said. It happens that I go through the entire thread and get pretty much confused.
I thought, I should be more attentive -try to really understand what is going on, but then I fall on another thread and all of a sudden -a breath of fresh air. There is no superhuman concentration required to understand.

Not sure still; sometimes I go through a hole book and really struggle to make out what is being said. God, i hate them books - it leaves me with the impression the author didn't understand much either.


Is it just me and my language issues? Anybody else has this problem?

 

[rsnedaker]

If I am reading a difficult book or boring book I have this problem. There are some threads where certain posts aren't written clearly, and that's something to consider. I mostly have a problem remembering what I read, specifically details, like names especially at times that I want to recall them like in a conversation. Another thing that really frustrates me is that I'll mean to say one word, but I'll say another when speaking a sentence. For instance I'll say November when I really mean January. I don't know why I do this. I catch it afterwards and correct myself, but...

 

[Beau]

Can you give an example from the forum of something you didn't understand? A particular thread or post maybe.

 

[andi]

Can you give an example from the forum of something you didn't understand? A particular thread or post maybe.

I don't know if giving an example would be a good idea. I fear not to put a bad one or something.
I mean, what I said was in general,not specifically.

I see that my post is on the subjective side and some thoughts are scattered here and there.
On one side, I might want to rant about some posts that I find to be out of place.
On the other, I think I wanted a confirmation on just how hard this all thing is. It is so much work, it is constantly hard and hits coming for everywhere, and I understand little and even that takes time.

Sorry, My initial post is a little misguiding.

 

[Hildegarda]

On one side, I might want to rant about some posts that I find to be out of place.
On the other, I think I wanted a confirmation on just how hard this all thing is [..]My initial post is a little misguiding.

So, the misguiding part is that in reality, you really DO perceive the difference between complicated posts and poorly written ones. And, these two kind of posts elicit different frustrations in you. You just lumped them together to say "poor me" and get some validation. Or so it seems. But listen, it's not serving your discernment, and moreover, you don't need to mix things in this way to be heard here.

I do confirm that yes, reading many threads on this forum is hard work. It's very information-dense and need to be fully processed before it can be absorbed. Or it could be very emotionally intense, and you have to really get into other people's shoes to see all the nuances. Or it could be both, if it triggers some programs. It can be very frustrating to feel that you can't keep up, that's for sure. You might want to think of and try some strategies that may help getting over the hump. E.g., taking a short break and doing something physical. Another trick that helps me in such situation is to make an effort to keep reading, paying attention to what's going on in head (or heart, or around that general area). And do it long enough to feel a change, things shifting, something expanding, something sinking deep. After that, I feel I am good to go for a while more, or can take a break. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But any consistent effort, however small, is forming good habits and making incremental changes. May this be an encouragement.

As for posts that you feel are out of place, they may very well be. But consider that feeling unusually frustrated about them may be rooted in projection. I know that I am at my most judgmental in times when I myself feel particularly weak and unworthy. Perhaps some similar strategies of stepping back, thinking what precisely is bothering you and what it may really mean in relation to you personally, may be helpful.

 

[Ivecky]

It is not a question of language knowledge or the lack of it, but context. I rather think it is me that doesn't understand. In some of the posts I read, I have a hard time summarizing what is being said. It happens that I go through the entire thread and get pretty much confused.
I thought, I should be more attentive -try to really understand what is going on, but then I fall on another thread and all of a sudden -a breath of fresh air. There is no superhuman concentration required to understand.

Hi Andi,
You aren't alone in this problem, I've spent many a late nights and early mornings pouring over forum topics, books, web sites etc and come across something that to me sounds really quite profound, however I don't have a "light bulb" moment upon reading the particular post or page (when I think I should be understanding what is being said). Some times I will research a "key word" in the passage to help give myself greater context of the subject and some times this works but a lot of the time it doesn't and I guess it might be just a part of the process of forming new thought processes. As you said, your problem might be a lack of context and context to me implies a connection of information or ideas and perhaps the building of the proper connections hasn't taken place in your mind at this time and you overload yourself with data.

After a lifetime of having programmed thought processes imposed upon us it takes a little longer to "rewire" those processes and create new ones. When this happens to me I understand that the process of forming new connections takes time and I take a little breather or even put the book down for a few days to let the information absorb and some times out of the blue (in a moment of exhilaration) I'll have a "light bulb" moment and understand the idea that I was struggling with earlier and my whole world will be changed.

But don't worry too much Andi I guess it'll come to you when it comes to you and there's no point in wasting energy stressing over something you can't force.

Good luck.

 

[andi]

If I am reading a difficult book or boring book I have this problem. There are some threads where certain posts aren't written clearly, and that's something to consider. I mostly have a problem remembering what I read, specifically details, like names especially at times that I want to recall them like in a conversation. Another thing that really frustrates me is that I'll mean to say one word, but I'll say another when speaking a sentence. For instance I'll say November when I really mean January. I don't know why I do this. I catch it afterwards and correct myself, but...

..me too I have problems remembering what I sometimes read, I think this is a lack of concentration rather than poor memory. As for the manes, yes, that can be problem. For me all names starting with the letter M are all mixed up.

 

[Laura]

I think it would help if those that don't understand posts would say so at the point in time that they realize they don't understand. That would help those who may write in a complicated way to try to figure out how to write differently, and it would help those who write about complex topics to learn how to break it down and explain it better.

Was that clear?

 

[andi]

So, the misguiding part is that in reality, you really DO perceive the difference between complicated posts and poorly written ones. And, these two kind of posts elicit different frustrations in you. You just lumped them together to say "poor me" and get some validation. Or so it seems. But listen, it's not serving your discernment, and moreover, you don't need to mix things in this way to be heard here.

Yep, that does seem to be so.

I do confirm that yes, reading many threads on this forum is hard work. It's very information-dense and need to be fully processed before it can be absorbed. Or it could be very emotionally intense, and you have to really get into other people's shoes to see all the nuances. Or it could be both, if it triggers some programs. It can be very frustrating to feel that you can't keep up, that's for sure.

It is emotionally intense and those are the moments in witch my programs are challenged the most. There was no instance for me when I happen to read a difficult post or write my own when I do not get really emotional and all sorts of barriers are keeping me to go any further. The very frustrating part is that i see the barriers but I have to struggle a lot to get passed them and what I do see, is that once in a while it creates a lot of other adjacent problems.

You might want to think of and try some strategies that may help getting over the hump. E.g., taking a short break and doing something physical. Another trick that helps me in such situation is to make an effort to keep reading, paying attention to what's going on in head (or heart, or around that general area). And do it long enough to feel a change, things shifting, something expanding, something sinking deep. After that, I feel I am good to go for a while more, or can take a break. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But any consistent effort, however small, is forming good habits and making incremental changes.

Thanks. I used to use the physical as a trick -it worked great but not every time as you also suggest.
For most of the time, I just keep on reading and reading until I get really tired and need a break and all of a sudden, after a cigarette or something, thinks clear up and a radical increase in energy. But this are more on the short side; they last little and they are hard to achieve.

May this be an encouragement.

Thanks, I really appreciate the effort and it is well received.

As for posts that you feel are out of place, they may very well be. But consider that feeling unusually frustrated about them may be rooted in projection. I know that I am at my most judgmental in times when I myself feel particularly weak and unworthy. Perhaps some similar strategies of stepping back, thinking what precisely is bothering you and what it may really mean in relation to you personally, may be helpful.

Exactly, well in fact I could go as far as saying they are all a projection of some sort- it is just figuring out what is causing it.
Like you say, when I feel week and unworthy, I mostly hold onto negative emotions witch are helpful for bringing forth the beloved programs but in the same time they are the most energy consuming and I don't always have that reservoir to let them run.

 

[andi]

I think it would help if those that don't understand posts would say so at the point in time that they realize they don't understand. That would help those who may write in a complicated way to try to figure out how to write differently, and it would help those who write about complex topics to learn how to break it down and explain it better.

Was that clear?

Ya, that makes perfect sens.

 

[andi]

As you said, your problem might be a lack of context and context to me implies a connection of information or ideas and perhaps the building of the proper connections hasn't taken place in your mind at this time and you overload yourself with data.

You have explain it simple and in perfect terms. Connection is the key word I think.

Good luck.

Thanks ! :) you too.