what is the lesson?

[knowledge_of_self]

Hi guys:

I had an interesting experience today. I was waiting for my spouse to get a haircut at a salon. And there was some other people there getting their haircuts. One that caught my attention was a cute little boy (3 years old) and his father. The boy and the father were there with the boy's nanny. After the little boy finished his haircut he went to the waiting area (where I was) to sit with his nanny and wait for his dad to get his haircut. The little boy also received a loly- pop from the barber at the end of his haircut. Anyway I was making a little conversation with the little boy when all of a sudden he dropped his loly-pop on the floor. The nanny picked up the loly-pop and dusted off the hair on it and gave it back to the kid to eat. I couldn't believe my eyes but didn't say anything because I didn't want to make a big deal and since no one asked me anything I didn't want to interfere. The nanny lady was after-all around 35-40 years old. I thought she MUST know that something that has fallen on the ground is dirty and should not be given to a child. But I guess she didn't know. Anyway, after I told my spouse what I had witnessed, he told me that I should have said something. He said if I was in your place I would have said something, or at least told the father of the incident. I felt really bad for not saying anything at that moment. But the reason I didn't say anything is because I didn't think it was any of my business, and I didn't want to violate anyone's free-will or make an argument or anything big. I know that my decision to not address the issue wasn't wrong or right, it was just a lesson, but what type of lesson? I keep asking my self whether I would make the same choice next time if an event such as this is presented to me. So anyway, I just wanted to post this situation to the group and get some feedback as to what others think they would have done in my place.
Thanks guys
Nina

 

[ash]

5 second rule was always in place in my house! if food fell on the floor, a mental timer goes on for all who see it and if its past the 5 second mark. we would toss it in the trash, y'kno like potatochip, popcorn, candy unless u got hair on it, then it was surrendered to the can in the corner. reluctantly sometimes - rofl

 

[Saman]

I agree with your spouse on this. If the parents were not aware that the nanny had given a dirty candy to their child, I would have informed the father what had happened and then leave it to him to decide what to do about the rest of the situation.

 

[tschai]

Nanny probably figured the little tyke would of picked it up and stuck it in his mouth-hair and all anyway-so she at least dusted it off before giving it back. Kids do stuff like that...

As far as not saying anything-don't worry about it. Kids are pretty resilient and if that's the worst that ever gets put in his mouth he'll be fine. Kids put all kinds of nasty stuff in their mouths-they even eat dirt-and no worse for wear.

Now if Nanny would have given him his lolly back WITHOUT dusting it of first-you might of gently said " Here, let's get you another, that has all yucky hairs on it"- the kid might say o.k. (Nanny might tell you to mind yer own business lady!") But then again-the kid might have been obstinate and cried to have THAT one back... who knows.

But I wouldn't fret over it-it's a done deal.

 

[Jehanni]

Yes, good point Nina! Always ask your "higher self", or whatever term you wish to give to who you really are.... What is the lesson at hand? What have I learned from this? You would not have gone through any situation of life, without having amassed the coinsciousness to make the correct, safe, choice. However, as you know ... that is "the lesson at hand." How many times do you need the lesson, to where you will eventually make the correct choice.... correct following the 8 paths to enlightenment This doen't relate to what you asked, however I'll go into it anyway ... The Buddist 8-fold path, which Avatars and Angels (few people on the planet currently) follow:

1) Correct speech
2) Correct motive
3) Correct speech
4) Correct conduct
5) Correct living
6) Correct effort
7) Correct intellectual activity
8) Correct contemplation

Sorry for getting religious on you, however, to answer the question I saw in the religious section ... in Latin "Religion" is the word "relegar". Also, your asking the questions "Jedi Knights" should be asking themselves! This word in Latin means "Return to Source". Now there's a "Jedi way" of looking at things ...eh?

There are two ways to "learn". One is from the "Tree of Life", where lessons always come wrapped with love & compassion .... or after many times where "choices" are given to you, and your "puppet masters (your higher personalities and coinscious states of your personality)" realize that "time-is-a-running-out" for the choice which results in LOVE & COMPASSION to be made, they simply choose to give the lesson from another "Tree" ... The "Tree of "D____", which can often bring "pain" and "suffering" into your reality. This is "The world of Assiah", a world of "action", where we eventually learn the way of correct choices and responses.

Knowledge of self occurs in 4 practical levels. There can be many more , but these are the 4 main generic levels one can "rise" through.

1) knowledge

2) Understanding

3) Wisdom

4) Experience


"Know" that you 'know", so that the 'knowledge" can give you the "understanding" so you have the "wisdom" to make it through the "experience".

A certain "friend" argues with me that you need experience first, so that you can have the wisdom to move through the experience. However, I disagree with my friend!
Personally, I like my "risks". My friends way is "way to boring".

"But the reason I didn't say anything is because I didn't think it was any of my business, and I didn't want to violate anyone's FREE-WILL or make an argument or anything big.".... "I know that my decision to not address the issue wasn't wrong or right, it was just a lesson, but what type of lesson?"

... and that is your choice. I believe a correct choice, simply because they didn't ask for any information.... however, it was / is your choice to feel bad. There's a good book (paperback), called "Illusions" by Richard Bach, where he has some good points... in case you havn't come across it. In these times be the "Earl's Bird", and simply keep your ideas to yourself, sitting on a wall or whatever that Bird does in his spare time ... watching, unless people ask for your help... then by all means do what you can to help!

"I just wanted to post this situation to the group and get some feedback as to what others think they would have done in my place."

I THINK that our lives are "lived" and we have "booked the experience" into our Akhasic(sp?) record, which we carry the information in the bluish-white light in our etheric body (or in Egytian / Hawaiian thinking in the Kino aka body), a few inches around our body, so that more loving and compassionate choices can be made: we are always in the right place, at the right time, doing exactly what we should be doing.... each "choice" will take you exactly where you should be, to learn exactly what you need to learn!

So it comes down to your "book of life", and what you have come here to learn!

peace & love,
Jehanni

 

[Cyre2067]

Actually for a 3 yr old bacterial and viral infections are a good thing and "playing in the dirt" should be encouraged. Builds their immune system's antibody bank. Learned that in biochem.

 

[Peam]

I thought she MUST know that something that has fallen on the ground is dirty and should not be given to a child.

Is there any situation you can think of where you would eat or give your own child food off the floor? Lets say you were in occupied Iraq for instance and searching through the rubble of what's left of your village for some scraps because you and your child hadn't eaten for a few days. You find some food on the floor, no way to get every bit of dirt off. Would you let your child eat it?
There's people starving to death all over the world who love to have that lollypop.

Also, everone's standards of hygene are different. I knew a family that lived in such a scruffy and grime laden home that you'd feel the need for a shower after you'd visited (because of choice, they didn't feel the need or effort to keep the place clean was worth it I suppose). Their kids never seemed to get ill, whereas I've seen other families which had very high standards of hygene where, if there was a bug going round, their kids were sure to be the first to get it.

Perhaps a few germs now and then from a dropped lolly or crisp and what not builds up a bit of immunity for more serious stuff.

 

[manitoban]

As the mom of a three year old, I can safely say that the situation described at the hairdressers is an incredibly common one. I, personally, would have appreciated being told that my child was about to eat someone else's hair/dirt, but a lot of parents wouldn't. And there is evidence that exposure to germs does build up immunity. I would not be too concerned about it, the three year old boys I know seem to be, as Tschai mentioned, putting dirt and whatnot into their mouths and surviving it.

 

[MaskedAvatar]

There may be more toxins in recently applied floor cleaner and the residue of brushed off shampooed hair particles than in good natural dirt provided by mother earth.

I am not sure that any 5-second rule would apply situationally - maybe it depends on the salon.

;)

 

[Ryan]

Anyway, after I told my spouse what I had witnessed, he told me that I should have said something. He said if I was in your place I would have said something, or at least told the father of the incident. I felt really bad for not saying anything at that moment.

Hi Nina,

What stands out for me is that you didn't feel too badly about it until after your spouse chimed in with his opinion. So did you really feel bad about not saying anything? Or did you only feel bad because he felt bad? Who was running what programs here? ;)

 

[Tigersoap]

Anyway, after I told my spouse what I had witnessed, he told me that I should have said something. He said if I was in your place I would have said something, or at least told the father of the incident. I felt really bad for not saying anything at that moment. But the reason I didn't say anything is because I didn't think it was any of my business, and I didn't want to violate anyone's free-will or make an argument or anything big.

I think that's really an important question, more so than to ask if the kid should have eaten the lollipop (I mean if that's his lesson to eat hairy lollipop, well, what can you do about it ? )

It happens all the time, where we might see or be involved in situations which makes us want to react because we think it's the correct course of action.

I suppose that's when we should really try to observe ourselves and discern which part of us want to do "right" and for what reasons.

We all have a different idea of what's correct and beneficial but in the end what do we really know ?

I don't mean that we should stand back and let things happen but we should be careful not to want to set things straight according to our own idea of right and wrong.

Maybe this is related to what i am talking about :

(L) Are instincts different from emotions?
A:Yes.
Q: (L) How can you tell the difference between instinctive knowledge and emotional reactions?
A: Emotions involve wishful thinking, instincts are "gut feelings," psychic in nature, and are stronger. When it is wishful thinking, there is always psychic instinct seeping through which you can access if you use reason and examine your lessons of the past.

That was my two euro cents on the question.

 

[knowledge_of_self]

Hi everyone and thanks for your thoughts and comments.

What stands out for me is that you didn't feel too badly about it until after your spouse chimed in with his opinion. So did you really feel bad about not saying anything? Or did you only feel bad because he felt bad? Who was running what programs here?

Interesting observation Ryan, but the reason I even told my spouse about the situation was because I was feeling rather confused of whether I had done the 'right' thing by not telling the nanny or the father. So it was not because of my spouse's comments that I felt bad, it was just that after he said what he would have done in my place, I started to question my self even more about whether my action was the 'right' one. But after discussing it with him further, I came to the conclusion that my action was not 'right' or 'wrong' it was just a lesson.

It happens all the time, where we might see or be involved in situations which makes us want to react because we think it's the correct course of action.
I suppose that's when we should really try to observe ourselves and discern which part of us want to do "right" and for what reasons.
We all have a different idea of what's correct and beneficial but in the end what do we really know ?
I don't mean that we should stand back and let things happen but we should be careful not to want to set things straight according to our own idea of right and wrong.

Originally when I witnessed the situation, I thought many things mostly emotional. These voices in my head started telling me, "You should say SOMETHING. That's not right. Bluh bluh bluh." And I asked my self the question of whether I am being emotional at that moment and the answer was yes. I thought to myself, I am pretty emotional right now, so lets say I do say something to the nanny, it may come out the wrong way, and even if I did have a point, it may pass her just by because of my approach. But then again, not saying anything also made it so that she is not told this idea by me and therefore she has NO choice to choose whether to do the same act the next time as well. And this is all assuming she knew giving a dirty lollypop to a child is potentially a bad thing. Also another thing that went through my mind at the moment was, this kid probably looks up to the nanny because she is older. So if a situation like this ever arises again, and there is no grownup there, the kid will most likely just pick up the candy or whatever that has fallen on the ground and put it back in his mouth because it has never been told to him to do otherwise, therefore the chances of that child getting sick increases.

However, I do agree with you Tigersoap, that we really don't know what is 'right' or 'wrong' due to the fact that we are all different with different mentalities, and so the statement by the C's "all there is, is lessons" applies well in this situation.
So anyway, after reading what you all have shared and discussing it with my spouse, we are still at the same place that it was just a lesson and my response to the situation was neither 'right' or 'wrong'. One thing is for sure, this situation has led me to be more observant and put more thought into making a decision in a similar situation.

Anyway, thanks again everyone for your inputs.
Nina