I am reading a book right now about Destiny, or the Call of the Soul. It's called The Soul's Code by James Hillman, and he has a fascinating section on love. Why do we do it? How? His section in this chapter is focused on the nature-vs-nurture debate. Is our capacity for romance genetic? Is it based on our upbringing? A lot of forum talk has focused on knowing our machine - the sexual biological urges, which is different for men and women, and how these manifest in our psychology. There's also been discussion about how our psychology, including our developmental traumas, condition our way of seeing the world. And we can see this nature-nurture dynamic playing out in these books as imperfect humans making good choices in sometimes horrible situations - and love responding to see them through to marriage.
Hillman adds more complexity to this nature/nurture debate by adding a third factor - a spiritual factor, or the factor of information, or 'invisible influence', or the soul contract that we make in 5D before we get here. This is what I was talking about in my posts above when I mentioned teleology. Somehow, our life has a path, and based on the 5D material, we set that path before we come here. I found Hillman's exposition of this to be a fascinating approach to the nature/nurture debate. As the C's said in session 19 July 1997:
So what Hillman does is makes use of Plato's Myth of Er, which is source of the Western concept of how Souls incarnate here. It makes for a good read in itself. Basically, we choose our path or our image or our paradigm before we get here - then we drink the waters of Lethe and forget it all - but all is not lost, because we have a sort of guardian angel who accompanies us when we are born. The word for this angel is daimon. The small guiding voice of Socrates, or William Blake, etc. The word itself sounds a lot like demon. My speculation for this linguistic drift is because through the Church's monotheistic crackdown, any voice other than the clergy was determined to be Satanic. So guides or the Higher Self became literally demonized. Which is very different from Paul's admonition that it is important to engage in an active practice of 'discrimination of the spirits' - to know which voice that whispers in your ear, gives you an idea, is daimonic, or angelic, vs. demonic.
Anyways, here's his chapter.
LOVE
We seem not as unique in our loving as we might like to believe. People seem to have similar styles of loving. Adult identical twins show this similarity most clearly, for they tend to conceive of love in the same way.
By "styles of loving" I am referring to the models used in "love research." The broad concept "love" is sorted into a variety of baskets, such as responsible altruistic caretaking (agape), practical partnership (pragma), erotic intimacy (eros), and so on. Identical twins converge in these categories. Yet the reason for the similarity is not genetic.
The findings from this first behavior genetic analysis of adult love styles are remarkable for two reasons. First, we know of no personality domain [stress tolerance, aggression, control, etc.] in which genetic factors play such a small role. . . . Second, we are aware of no attitude [religious beliefs, race biases, etc.] in which genetic factors play such a small role.
Now here is a happy curiosity. These twins are in accord in all love styles except for one: mania, the obsessive, tormented feeling usually characteristic of romantic love. So we have to inquire into why the exception of manic romantic love. In this specific regard there seems to be an independence of the heart. Manic love is something else!
Since the explanation for the similarity of styles is not genetic, the research model allows only one alternative: environment. Look-alike twins who love alike have picked up identical love maps.
"Love maps" are one of the ways psychology tries to account for the mysteries of being seized by love. You grow up in a parental environment where certain features bring pleasure, meet needs, enhance vitality. These characteristics forma schema that you fall for when a person crosses your path who seems to have the attributes of the love map. "As you grow up, this unconscious map takes shape and a composite proto-image of the ideal sweetheart gradually emerges. . . .So, long before your true love walks past you in a classroom, at a shopping mall, or in the office, you have already constructed some basic elements of your ideal sweetheart."
The love map consists of layers. Cross-cultural researc hclaims that there is a collective level for love maps in general, such as a good complexion. In women, bodies that are plump and wide-hipped are universally attractive; in men, worldly goods, such as cars or camels. Then there are layers reflecting traditions, fashions, and local community norms. The theory of love maps suggests that environmental conditioning deter-mines the object of your desire.
Other psychologists call this object choice a projection. According to Jungian psychology, the projection springs from an archetypal source as part of each soul's intimate essence. For Jungians, the love map has highly individualized features, because it is a complex image in the heart that brings about the "fall" and the feeling that this is a call of fate. The more obsessive and compelling the image, the more madly in love you become, which intensifies the conviction that indeed fate is calling. Jungians name this archetypal factor that skews the love map toward a particular person, the anima and animus.
Hillman adds more complexity to this nature/nurture debate by adding a third factor - a spiritual factor, or the factor of information, or 'invisible influence', or the soul contract that we make in 5D before we get here. This is what I was talking about in my posts above when I mentioned teleology. Somehow, our life has a path, and based on the 5D material, we set that path before we come here. I found Hillman's exposition of this to be a fascinating approach to the nature/nurture debate. As the C's said in session 19 July 1997:
A: Laura, my dear, if you really want to reveal "many beautiful and amazing things," all you need to do is remember the triad, the trilogy, the trinity, and look always for the triplicative connecting clue profile. Connect the threes... do not rest until you have found three beautifully balancing meanings!!
Q: So, in everything there are three aspects?
A: And why? Because it is the realm of the three that you occupy. In order to possess the keys to the next level, just master the Third Man Theme, then move on with grace and anticipation.
So what Hillman does is makes use of Plato's Myth of Er, which is source of the Western concept of how Souls incarnate here. It makes for a good read in itself. Basically, we choose our path or our image or our paradigm before we get here - then we drink the waters of Lethe and forget it all - but all is not lost, because we have a sort of guardian angel who accompanies us when we are born. The word for this angel is daimon. The small guiding voice of Socrates, or William Blake, etc. The word itself sounds a lot like demon. My speculation for this linguistic drift is because through the Church's monotheistic crackdown, any voice other than the clergy was determined to be Satanic. So guides or the Higher Self became literally demonized. Which is very different from Paul's admonition that it is important to engage in an active practice of 'discrimination of the spirits' - to know which voice that whispers in your ear, gives you an idea, is daimonic, or angelic, vs. demonic.
Anyways, here's his chapter.
LOVE
We seem not as unique in our loving as we might like to believe. People seem to have similar styles of loving. Adult identical twins show this similarity most clearly, for they tend to conceive of love in the same way.
By "styles of loving" I am referring to the models used in "love research." The broad concept "love" is sorted into a variety of baskets, such as responsible altruistic caretaking (agape), practical partnership (pragma), erotic intimacy (eros), and so on. Identical twins converge in these categories. Yet the reason for the similarity is not genetic.
The findings from this first behavior genetic analysis of adult love styles are remarkable for two reasons. First, we know of no personality domain [stress tolerance, aggression, control, etc.] in which genetic factors play such a small role. . . . Second, we are aware of no attitude [religious beliefs, race biases, etc.] in which genetic factors play such a small role.
Now here is a happy curiosity. These twins are in accord in all love styles except for one: mania, the obsessive, tormented feeling usually characteristic of romantic love. So we have to inquire into why the exception of manic romantic love. In this specific regard there seems to be an independence of the heart. Manic love is something else!
Since the explanation for the similarity of styles is not genetic, the research model allows only one alternative: environment. Look-alike twins who love alike have picked up identical love maps.
"Love maps" are one of the ways psychology tries to account for the mysteries of being seized by love. You grow up in a parental environment where certain features bring pleasure, meet needs, enhance vitality. These characteristics forma schema that you fall for when a person crosses your path who seems to have the attributes of the love map. "As you grow up, this unconscious map takes shape and a composite proto-image of the ideal sweetheart gradually emerges. . . .So, long before your true love walks past you in a classroom, at a shopping mall, or in the office, you have already constructed some basic elements of your ideal sweetheart."
The love map consists of layers. Cross-cultural researc hclaims that there is a collective level for love maps in general, such as a good complexion. In women, bodies that are plump and wide-hipped are universally attractive; in men, worldly goods, such as cars or camels. Then there are layers reflecting traditions, fashions, and local community norms. The theory of love maps suggests that environmental conditioning deter-mines the object of your desire.
Other psychologists call this object choice a projection. According to Jungian psychology, the projection springs from an archetypal source as part of each soul's intimate essence. For Jungians, the love map has highly individualized features, because it is a complex image in the heart that brings about the "fall" and the feeling that this is a call of fate. The more obsessive and compelling the image, the more madly in love you become, which intensifies the conviction that indeed fate is calling. Jungians name this archetypal factor that skews the love map toward a particular person, the anima and animus.