A Brief Guide to Scientific Literature

[Buddy]

From: <chris#NoSpam.labtam.labtam.oz.au>

A brief guide to Scientific literature
======================================

The following phrases, frequently found in technical writings, are defined below for your enlightenment.

Phrase Translation
------------------------------------------------

It has been long known...............I haven't bothered to check the references
It is known..........................I believe
It is believed.......................I think
It is generally believed.............My colleagues and I think
There has been some discussion.......Nobody agrees with me
It can be shown......................Take my word for it
It is proven.........................It agrees with something mathematical
Of great theoretical importance......I find it interesting
Of great practical importance........This justifies my employment
Of great historical importance.......This ought to make me famous
Some samples were chosen for study...The others didn't make sense
Typical results are shown............The best results are shown
Correct within order of magnitude....Wrong
The values were obtained empirically.The values were obtained by accident
The results are inconclusive.........The results seem to disprove my hypothesis
Additional work is required..........Someone else can work out the details
It might be argued that..............I have a good answer to this objection
The investigations proved rewarding..My grant has been renewed


Presumably at longer times...........I didn't take the time to find out.

The agreement with the predicted
curve is...
excellent fair
good poor
satisfactory doubtful
fair imaginary
as good as could be expected non-existent

From: <dennov#NoSpam.worldnet.att.net>

"A definite trend is evident"... These data are practically meaningless.

"These results will be in a subsequent report"... I might get around to this sometime, if pushed/funded.

"In my experience"... Once!

"In case after case"... Twice!

"In a series of cases"... Thrice!

"It is believed that"... I think...
etc. (see above)

"A highly significant area for exploratory study"... A totally useless topic selected by my committee.

 

[Gaby]

 

[HiThere]

So true! :P

 

[Juba]

Jeez, at first I was laughing but after couple minutes, I start to think about; how many books, articles, scientific works or even school books had such phrases mixed in. Sadly all of them

Thanks Bud for posting.

 

[brainwave]

This is so true!!!

 

[rylek]

Very true indeed (coming from someone just writing up a master's thesis)

 

[psychegram]

We've had this posted in my office since before I started my Master's thesis. I lol-ed hard then, and now. So, so true.

 

[Jacques]

Thank you Bud.

 

[mkrnhr]

so true!!

 

[nwigal]

Around 10 years ago, I was considering going for a PHD in astrophysics. The refreshingly honest professor clued me in to the acronyms used to by the sell-outs of the community to hide behind the reality of the research.
Amazing similarities to the military's use of same. I guess FUBAR by any other name is still FUBAR? Maybe I should go back to making pictures...

 

[Jeremy F Kreuz]

thanks Bud.

I printed it out and will lay them next to the paper I am writing for the moment. Guess a few (= many) will show up.

 

[shellycheval]

Thanks Bud--I will be posting this in the Faculty Work room at my college!
shellycheval

 

[Rabelais]

Deciphering scientific studies

Science Translations

The following list of phrases and their definitions might help you understand the mysterious language of science and medicine. These special phrases are also applicable to anyone working on a Ph.D. dissertation or academic paper anywhere!

"It has long been known" = I didn't look up the original reference.

"A definite trend is evident" = These data are practically meaningless.

"While it has not been possible to provide definite answers to the questions" = An unsuccessful experiment, but I still hope to get it published.

"Three of the samples were chosen for detailed study" = The other results didn't make any sense.

"Typical results are shown" = This is the prettiest graph.

"These results will be in a subsequent report" = I might get around to this sometime, if pushed/funded.

"In my experience" = once.

"In case after case" = twice.

"In a series of cases" = thrice.

"It is believed that" = I think.

"It is generally believed that" = A couple of others think so, too.

"Correct within an order of magnitude" = Wrong.

"According to statistical analysis" = Rumor has it.

"A statistically oriented projection of the significance of these findings" = A wild guess.

"A careful analysis of obtainable data" = Three pages of notes were obliterated when I knocked over a glass of pop.

"It is clear that much additional work will be required before a complete understanding of this phenomenon occurs" = I don't understand it.

"After additional study by my colleagues" = They don't understand it either.

"Thanks are due to Joe Blotz for assistance with the experiment and to Cindy Adams for valuable discussions" = Mr. Blotz did the work, and Ms. Adams explained to me what it meant.

"A highly significant area for exploratory study" = A totally useless topic selected by my committee.

"It is hoped that this study will stimulate further investigation in this field" = I quit.

 

[ark]

Re: Deciphering scientific studies

The point is that even if it has been published as a joke, it's all true!

 

[shijing]

Just a note that I merged this topic with the earlier one started by Bud since they are largely overlapping (and both quite funny!)