A unique NDE

buz/p said:
As the feed-back continues to trickle in I thought I would update a bit on a connection. I have given my wife the book to read as she has asked for an entry into what 'ails me'. ;) As she has displayed an aggressive bias against Laura as leader of a dangerous cult none of the other literature impresses her. So I have decided to introduce peripheral sources to begin to show her that this stuff doesn't just come out of thin air (that is, of course, except for the Cs stuff- ahem) So far she is buying Alexander's experience. That is good because she and I have reached a crisis point in our relationship which must be resolved before I can move on.

It has been said over and over and over again here on the forum, don't try to make your partner, children, friends, etc. "like" Laura's work. Not everybody is ready for what we talk about here. When they are ready, they will find it on their own. All you are doing is hurting Laura by insisting that your wife get onboard with your ideas. You are also abridging your wife's free will by trying to get her to see things your way.

Laura is ALWAYS the one who gets attacked in these situations by others saying the exact same things your wife is saying about her being the leader of a cult - which she most definitely is NOT.

If you have not done so yet, please read about strategic enclosure and external considering. If you are not already trying to do the Work, this is an excellent place to start.

The best thing you could do is to tell your wife that you agree with her and are no longer interested in Laura's work and not read anything having to do with Laura's work while your wife is around.
 
Nienna said:
buz/p said:
As the feed-back continues to trickle in I thought I would update a bit on a connection. I have given my wife the book to read as she has asked for an entry into what 'ails me'. ;) As she has displayed an aggressive bias against Laura as leader of a dangerous cult none of the other literature impresses her. So I have decided to introduce peripheral sources to begin to show her that this stuff doesn't just come out of thin air (that is, of course, except for the Cs stuff- ahem) So far she is buying Alexander's experience. That is good because she and I have reached a crisis point in our relationship which must be resolved before I can move on.

It has been said over and over and over again here on the forum, don't try to make your partner, children, friends, etc. "like" Laura's work. Not everybody is ready for what we talk about here. When they are ready, they will find it on their own. All you are doing is hurting Laura by insisting that your wife get onboard with your ideas. You are also abridging your wife's free will by trying to get her to see things your way.

Laura is ALWAYS the one who gets attacked in these situations by others saying the exact same things your wife is saying about her being the leader of a cult - which she most definitely is NOT.

If you have not done so yet, please read about strategic enclosure and external considering. If you are not already trying to do the Work, this is an excellent place to start.

The best thing you could do is to tell your wife that you agree with her and are no longer interested in Laura's work and not read anything having to do with Laura's work while your wife is around.

Interesting. So what you are suggesting is that I lie to F**? Pretend... Yes I have been 'trying to do the work' for some time now- apparently with little success.
 
buz/p said:
Interesting. So what you are suggesting is that I lie to F**? Pretend... Yes I have been 'trying to do the work' for some time now- apparently with little success.

Gurdjieff said that being sincere with everyone is a weakness. He also told his students not to discuss the Work with others that were not in the class simply because they were not ready and so would not understand at all what the others were doing. Same thing here.

Also, as Laura has said, there is good and there is evil and there is the specific situation that determines which is which. So lying is good if it is for the right reasons. An example that Laura used (and I'm really paraphrasing here) is that if you were in a war and you were part of a group of freedom fighters and you were being questioned about certain people that were in your group, would you tell the truth and get them all killed, or would you lie and save their lives?

So the question is, will you continue to do things that are externally inconsiderate to your wife, but make you look (to yourself) that you are oh, so much more superior than she is, and also put Laura in even more danger than she already is? Or do you get rid of your internal considering, tell your wife what will ease her mind and help keep Laura safe? It is up to you, of course.

Lying is not always a bad thing. As I said above, the situation determines if it is, or not.

Also, I completely understand where you are coming from on trying to do the Work. But it is not always easy when you don't have others to give you objective feedback. If you have read Strangers to Ourselves and Thinking Fast and Slow, you will notice that the image we have of ourselves when only taken by our own thoughts, is rarely ever what we really are.

Don't be hard on yourself. Just realize that you are on the narrow path and it is not an easy path. Finding out things that show us who we truly are is hard to take, but it is also priceless because you can, then, work on the things that have been shown to you and make yourself a better person letting the essence get a little bit stronger, or so I think.
 
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