Asked to leave Public House

[Rich]

Pretty weird experience. I'd want to get to the bottom of it, so the first thing I'd do is go the gym and tell the manager or massage therapist that the owner of the pub apparently knows when I go to the gym and what I do there, and ask if they know how he could possibly know that.

Thanks Joe, sounds like a good idea for me to follow up on.

 

[Rich]

I second - that opinion! ... Why target - you? Are you in Law enforcement, yourself or employed in the Legal system?

No.

 

[BlackCartouche]

@Rich
Another thing to be made aware of in small close-knit communities: Solo newcomers having no known locals vouching for on ones behalf, can easily make for a convenient scapegoat of local shenanigans.

 

[SummerLite]

Thanks T.C, I think it was something along the lines of not making the place convivial. As in you're generating an undesirable atmosphere.

This gave me another thought on the matter. Coupled with the comment with you having a massage at the club, maybe these people think your gay and have an issue with that. If you had shown up when there was a crowd present, they may not have had any cause to feel agitated by this but being alone set the homophobia off since your now the center of attention.

Well, for what its worth.

 

[T.C.]

This gave me another thought on the matter. Coupled with the comment with you having a massage at the club, maybe these people think your gay and have an issue with that. If you had shown up when there was a crowd present, they may not have had any cause to feel agitated by this but being alone set the homophobia off since your now the center of attention.

Well, for what its worth.

Another FWIW, but a sexual based issue was what crossed my mind, too. Except I wondered if they'd called you a nonce or something.

At least, I think suspicion of sexual deviancy is something that can elicit this kind treatment from people who are pretty much complete strangers. And that's why I asked.

 

[Jenn]

Another FWIW, but a sexual based issue was what crossed my mind, too. Except I wondered if they'd called you a nonce or something.

At least, I think suspicion of sexual deviancy is something that can elicit this kind treatment from people who are pretty much complete strangers. And that's why I asked.

That was what crossed my mind too, although I thought maybe the massage therapist had made some sort of accusation of inappropriate behavior from you (or from the person they are mistaking you for) while receiving a massage... . Very bizarro scenario Rich, hope you get to the bottom of it!

 

[angelburst29]

This was true, I had. but he also said something that I didn’t really understand but think was an accusation of poor behavior that had been reported to him. What that was I’m not sure but left me thinking that someone had been making up stories. He then started speaking to the Police on his mobile phone. He was informing them that this guy (me) wasn’t welcome, had been asked to leave but refused. At the same time the other guy repeated the landlords views to me, supported him and took a photo of me with his camera. He also said a word that I really didn’t understand.

I think it was something like I was spoiling the convivial atmosphere and he didn’t like it when I told him I hadn’t heard that word before and was interested to know what it was. Still not really understanding what they were on about

Something derogatory - with sexual overtones - might have been directed at Rich but was "solely meant as a form of intimidation and degradation". Isn't that type of treatment generally seen as "a first line of attack' during an unwarranted and unprovoked confrontation?
I don't see anything in Rich's writings to suggest he did "anything out of the ordinary" other then "normal activity".

I suspect, the Pub might be involved in something "illicit" and due to heightened paranoid fear of discovery, verbally attacked Rich because he's fairly new to the neighborhood (an outsider) and they might perceive Rich as an undercover Agent of some kind - for whatever reason? Actually, the Pub owner and his side kick might have "exposed their hand" in a mirror effect of what they might be hiding? Dragging the gym and the massage into their accusations was just to give them "ammo to fire" to add to the intimidation?

 

[Beau]

What about the possibility that there's something you've said or done which you are unaware of as the reason for their behavior? Is there anything you can think of that would lead them to find you undesirable in the area? Something I would think of, if it were me, is to try and recount exactly how I've behaved all the times that I've been around there. Instead of looking outwardly for answers, I would dig down into my own behavior and see if there's a legitimate reason for them to be wary.

 

[Rich]

What about the possibility that there's something you've said or done which you are unaware of as the reason for their behavior? Is there anything you can think of that would lead them to find you undesirable in the area? Something I would think of, if it were me, is to try and recount exactly how I've behaved all the times that I've been around there. Instead of looking outwardly for answers, I would dig down into my own behavior and see if there's a legitimate reason for them to be wary.

Thanks Beau. The only thing I can think of that I said in the bar was to the bar maid after she refused to accept a tip of 1 pound for a glass of soda water. I found it odd that she didn't want any extra money. I suppose I was coming from a preconceived idea that someone working behind a bar would welcome extra money. I probably would have had a facial expression that was indicating that but it probably could have been interpreted in a manner of ways that I am unaware of.

I have continued to try to get to the bottom of the interactions I had with the massage lady at the gym. I am finding it bizare how long it is taking me to get a response from her. Her name is Amanda and I have been into the gym about once a week asking if I can leave a message for her to give me a quick call (she has always been busy with a client so I've been unwilling to interrupt her). The latest is that a staff member assured me that she has received the messages and she will call me. So far nothing. It strikes me as a little odd that someone who is self employed doesn't return contact from a customer which could possibly lead to more business. Just makes me think she has a guilty conscience but I don't really think I'll know until I speak to her,

 

[Rich]

I realize I'm writing this a bit late, but here it is. I think it's quite unfortunate that these people didn't explain what the problem was, even when you asked. But if that's the case, then it's really their problem and not yours. So I would avoid giving much thought to the 'why' - no point in ruminating on something you were not given enough information about. You will not find the answer and you will just waste time and energy, so I suggest to just let it go if you can.

Yes. As much as it pains me, I think you're right WK :(

Despite leaving my phone number at the gym for the Masseur a few times, I've received no reply at all :( So I think in the words of Kenny Rogers in the Gambler: "You've got to know when to hold and when to fold", I am folding on this episode to close this chapter. I really did want this cleared up but think persisting is futile and much better to drop it and focus on more productive activities. Ultimately no harm done and I've enjoyed going to a different and much nicer pub that has life. It also has a very nice soft drink called kombucha. (I'd never seen it before, know little about it, but quite like the original version! :)