buried or cremated?

[loreta]

[quote author=Buddy]I've never ran across any material that explains why it is supposed to matter what is done to a body after death.

Buddhists claim that it takes a few days for the soul to completely separate from the body. During that time it is said proper treatment may mitigate potential confusion and/or terrors of the passing. They say cremation shouldn’t occur until then. The Tibetan Book of the Dead is actually a written account of what should be said to the corpse to explain the various experiences the dead dude is going through.

Can’t say I can verify this, but it seems interesting in light of near death experiences.

That is interesting. I wouldn't have a problem waiting a few days--even if the waiting were just for the heck of it.

From what I remember of the book, one should wait for three days before the body is 'laid to rest' and lay on their right side while dying. If that helps, so be it. :)
[/quote]

When I was young I remember that the tradition was to keep the dead person at home. I remember when my grand-father died, he stay at home almost one or two days. When he died all the family went to see him dead on the bed, I even kissed him, I remember. Death was natural, the family was with him, like something very natural. Now funerals houses is just business. It is a mafia. Now also you can not keep the dead person at home. There is no more link between the dead and the family, the dead and his surrounding, the dead and his house. Dead people have to be put away, as fast as possible. And you have to pay for that. And it is very expensive.

 

[supriyanoel]

I was thinking about these issues today, as I am moving and have inherited a good number of plots. They are in a cemetery I happen to love walking through. It is quite a renowned place that gives walking tours, and I visit only this one. The only reason I ever wanted to be buried there was that it was talked about among my small family through my life and we used to decide where we were going and who we wanted to be next to. It was a way to feel close. However I personally don't feel the desire to actually be buried, especially since I am the last person in the family.

My idea is to be cremated wherever I am, and if Tibet is where I am, then the birds are welcome in a big way to chomp their way through with delight. Chances are that may not come to be, so I will prepare a will and give directions. Prepaying seems the way to go if possible, revisions being made if I should change countries. I like the idea of leaving my name on one of the stones, but actually being cremated. The last word to the earthly attachment. Sounds scary even as I write it. With the possibility of coming back, remembering my past life and... EEEGADS! Maybe not!

I still visit the cemetery while I'm here and clean the graves as an act of love and service because I am there. It's not a ritual. Its similar to picking garbage off of someones front lawn. Not for lust of result. Just a service I perform when I see the need. I clean up some of the other graves too. Its the neglect that saddens me. I don't pay the fee for cleaning and neither do some others. Its never really to bad because the public comes on the tours. The place is beautiful and I enjoy being there. There are always duck friends I visit in the pond too.

Because this is a place you can no longer purchase sites in, at least the old part, I will gift it to someone who wants it ,possibly. It is one of the few places I will miss in this burg, as well as some other historical sites. If someone really wants this and wouldn't have access otherwise, why not? If they can deal with the idea of slowly rotting in a casket, and also having loved ones visit on all major religious holidays (as it is nondenominational) be my guest.

If there is anyone who chooses to acknowledge my death when it comes I would choose they celebrate. If I could arrange it I would pay for the catering and the hall. I also would ultimately like to be able to literally welcome a comet with open arms, surrounded by others who embraced it.

 

[plaintiger]

[quote author=Buddy]I've never ran across any material that explains why it is supposed to matter what is done to a body after death.

Buddhists claim that it takes a few days for the soul to completely separate from the body. During that time it is said proper treatment may mitigate potential confusion and/or terrors of the passing. They say cremation shouldn’t occur until then. The Tibetan Book of the Dead is actually a written account of what should be said to the corpse to explain the various experiences the dead dude is going through.

Can’t say I can verify this, but it seems interesting in light of near death experiences.

That is interesting. I wouldn't have a problem waiting a few days--even if the waiting were just for the heck of it.

From what I remember of the book, one should wait for three days before the body is 'laid to rest' and lay on their right side while dying. If that helps, so be it. :)
[/quote]

I have heard this information about waiting 3 days before cremation, I think from The Tibetan Book of the Dead (or maybe the preface to the book) as well. I recall the reason being to allow for full separation of the subtle bodies, especially the ethereal and astral, as burning the body previous to full separation can cause the departing spirit pain. But as above, I obviously cannot verify this.

I am for cremation too, the biggest reason being not to take up space. But if it were socially acceptable, I'd resign myself to the "bone breakers." Either way, I would no longer be residing in the body, and I wouldn't want anyone to have any undue attachment it or to relate my essence to a specific place like a plot in a cemetary. Still, I think an open casket (if possible) is a good idea in order to let people say their goodbyes.

My wife made a good point to me the other day about living wills, that regardless of what you want done to your body after transition, it's very important to be specific. For example, if you don't tell those who survive you where to spread your ashes, they may just wind up in a box on a shelf in someone's house because they don't know what to do with it. I don't think I'd like my memory to be linked to a box of any kind.

 

[Lisa Guliani]

I would like to be cremated. It is less expensive, less of a hassle for whoever is tasked with funeral arrangements and way less messy, I learned a great deal about burial vs. cremation growing up with my father, who was a funeral director and trade embalmer - so I got to see in graphic detail up close and center what is involved with either option.
Cremation just seems more sensible and you can avoid all the ritualistic tradition that typically goes hand in hand with the usual funeral and burial process, in my opinion.
Plus, you can also avoid the high cost of purchasing a tombstone and the equally expensive costs of engraving, buying a cemetery plot, etc...

I'd rather have the wind take me wherever it will.

 

[gaman]

I used to tell my wife that I wanted to be buried in the cheapest pine box out in the woods somewhere because I always loved the woods. This made her uncomfortable and she would jokingly say no way. So I told her I would be dead so she could do what she wanted, but if not that then cremation or whatever was cheapest because to me (here in SouthEast US anyway) the whole expensive casket + funeral thing is a massive money-making scheme. I also don't really want to "lay-in-state" for everyone to view because this just seems to pull out more agony of people and I'm not convinced it is cathartic in that context.

A good friend of mine died a few years ago and the "funeral" was just everyone getting together and telling some stories about him. That kind of thing would suit me just fine. Have some fun, have some laughs, appreciate the experience of the people around you.