Can't grow where I am planted

Wodnik said:
During that healing session I felt calm, peaceful and grounded.
As I wrote to Heather : I feel being myself again,my mind, body and soul were craving for that feeling for so long .

I'm sorry for all the suffering you've endured Wodnik, it sounds like a hell of a ride.

I'm glad to see you feeling better after everything! It must be real liberating for you, I hope you continue feeling better and better, and one day you'll look at all this as a big lesson. Thankfully we all join together and become stronger through suffering, and it must have been difficult to post your life sufferings, we are always here. Keep on going!
 
Curious is this drive to relocate (ranging from annoying to desperate in my case) especially taking in account C's Grow where you're planted... Maybe just a reptilian mind nagging in accord with vectoring attacks through unaware people in your closer perimeter. - who behave quite differentially when you are out of range of theirs...
 
Hi Wodnik,

I sympathize with your plight, although it isn't exactly the same way. I've lived in the same city (Montreal) my whole life yet I've never felt I've been able to really "grow", "enjoy" or even "live" here and always felt like leaving without never really having the opportunity to. I haven't even been able to travel either. Because my life here has been so negative generally speaking I've felt that if I go somewhere else I'd be able to have a clean slate and start over. I've come to realize that that's just wishful thinking and that I'd simply be bringing my problems with me and it would only be a matter of time they'd reappear once the "honeymoon phase" is over.

The fact is I'm blessed to live in the city I'm in. Millions of people dream to live here and I often meet people who immigrate here and are very happy to be here (I often call it "Disneyland" compared to the rest of the world). I have everything I need here to help me out with the issues I'm facing and if I need help from someone who lives elsewhere I always have Skype. Economically I might find better paying jobs elsewhere but the rest of North America also has higher costs of living (although it varies) so the fact is I might as well stay here and make the most out of it. I find it's better to focus on yourself rather than fantasizing about living elsewhere believing it would change everything, the grass is always greener after all.

I just did a SRT session with Patrick and Heather which I felt pretty liberating. As an aside I had worked with Patrick 10 years earlier in person when he lived in Montreal so I was happy to reconnect with him. When I have more money I intend to do more sessions since they are helping me, like you, with deaths in my family (my mother died when I was 12) and with an abusive father who did a lot of damage to me. I feel once I'm healed emotionally and resolved my past issues I'd be in a better position to "grow where I'm planted".

My only concern is when the SHTF be it nuclear war, comets, economic collapse, whatever, that Montreal isn't an ideal place to be. But in the mean time it's a great place to make the most of my life and help in my healing and growth. Even if I have some resentment and negative feelings towards growing up here in the end you gotta make the most of where you are. You don't necessarily need to be elsewhere to heal and grow. Hope this helps.
 
Hello: Kn0w1llusions, Wodnik and others who can relate to this feeling of not believing we are in the right place for doing what needs to be done,

Firstly, i will say that i am born in Montreal also, BUT was raised partly in Florida, and that at age 20 i emigrated to Europe where i lived 4 years in France, then 4 years in Ireland, then came back to Canada when i lived 8 years in Vancouver region, etc. ALL THIS TO SAY, that when we are in a certain frame of mind NOWHERE is the right place, BECAUSE EVERYWHERE IS THE SAME, it is a question of inner-life. AT NO TIME for my entire adult life up to that point did i ever think i would ever live here (Québec) again, especially after the birth of my own children in London and Dublin. Never did i think that i would one day be integrated to my birth familly (my mother/ father) and become best friends with my own mother?! I fought this with all my might, blaming my shortcomings on my birthplace, familly and environment instead of just embracing the work ahead and accepting that is who i am, this is where i am from, and these are the tools i have to work with! These people need me, in a direct daily way, whereas my own grown up children are doing just fine the way things are with me on another continent, and communication being what it is (thankful to Skype and such!) they have come to understand what i am doing and why... (If i give such details, it is in order to illustrate how far i went into denial, and how far from the truth i had to go in order to revert the energy and face what's really important for me to learn in this/my life lesson, this time around!)

Even moreso, in my case, i fled my life here for decades, then a day came when the only choice left was to rejoin my birth-familly (which i fled, always) and start doing the Work, precisely surrounded by these very people, in this very context! This was so important, that the place i moved to (a familly owned building on a street bearing my own surname! Imagine that! How powerful, and how prepared this was, just in case i chose to keep fleeing?! (Even that sign, i tryed to justify and circumvert. as if it were a trap set-up by 4D STS, yet no! This is where i had to be, and these are the people i am to do this work with, and every day i am thankful to wake up close to my mother, and happy to be able to help those near me... And no! They are NOT engaged in the Work, or working on their consciousness, at least not on the level we would understand it here BUT my presence here has, and does change many things for everyone involved. Even my own children, now back to living in Europe, took a while to believing that i had come back to sort out my past (as they described it) in order to better understand my present, and plan for the future.

This to me, has highlighted the fact that we are ALL IN THE RIGHT PLACE AT ALL TIMES, because it is the "i" that creates the very nature of our own surroundings (if that's not pushing it too far? yet that is what it is!!... Not just words...) and this was shown to me in no uncertain terms during a very memorable OOB experience a few years back! We are always at the very center of creation, and it is the movie around us that changes, and moves our illusion-body in and out of environments, all created by the mind, always on the head of the needle, in perfect central posision from where creation emanates!

I have been back fifteen years or so, and embarked on the path about or near 2008, a year later when the turnaround happened (2009) i spent two periods in a psychiatric ward (that is how strongly i needed to get into the Work, and shows what happens when we shove it aside, it pushes, and pressures us, towards the ever fleeting goal, until one finally gives up the fight and embraces the work ahead).

Having said that, please understand that i would not change any of it, not my choices, not anything! And, as the C's said in many occasions, things happen only when we are ready (receivership capabilities). This is nothing to do with where we are, and who is with us. If we should be somewhere else, WE WOULD BE, if we should be somewhere else, WE WOULD BE, BECAUSE THE WAVE IS NOT "COMING", THE WAVE IS HERE NOW UNDULATING AT FULL FORCE, ok?!

The Wave is presently HERE NOW, those who feel it, know it and yet cannot share it, cause most people are 'waiting' (mistake) or dreaming of moving or that some savior will show?! Now is time to lift our trousers, buckle our belt and get on with it, tomorrow may just be too little too late!

Love to all members of this soul-group-tribe, and i feel that we are getting stronger as a unit by the day, so i keep thinking in terms of we are as one, and as one we stand, and the feeling of strength grows in me.

Thank you

romochar

(NB: Having lived for years in cities such as Paris, Dublin, London, etc. i can guarantee someone in Montreal that you are in a really good and easy place to get along, because life in Europe is many times more of a struggle, and even more so when one goes to other regions such as countries considered to be poor. The fact is, as far as i understand it now, we are programmed for life where we are planted, and moving those roots is somewhat of a major 'doing' that most people would not be able to subject themselves to and come out on top, had they know ahead of time. (What i mean by the previous sentence is this; AT THIS SPECIFIC TIME, chosing to uproot and replant in the unknown soil of ELSEWHERE, more than likely would be our own undoing, and this, very precisely because of the time-frame we are in! And i can say that this was true for every other city i lived in, it made realise how 'easy' life in Montréal is, big time, considered to elsewhere where the grass seemed greener until i settled there!)
 
"I'm sorry for all the suffering you've endured Wodnik, it sounds like a hell of a ride.

I'm glad to see you feeling better after everything! It must be real liberating for you, I hope you continue feeling better and better, and one day you'll look at all this as a big lesson. Thankfully we all join together and become stronger through suffering, and it must have been difficult to post your life sufferings, we are always here. Keep on going!"

Hi Lilyalic,
Thankyou for your kind words, and for incourigment. When I look back at my life, and at all those lessons I went through I realised , that I couldn't say "no" through my entire life.
As a child,and a youngest in the family,I was very calm and rather on a soft side.
I coudn't argue or be demanding ,and perhaps that was a reason I ended up doing all the housework.
This aproch I continue through my marriage life as well, but now I know that I didn't have to ran away on a diffrent continent from my sister in-law ( her jealousy, nastiness and controlling aproch was unbearable).

For almost 2 years I have been asking myself : what am I doing here? Why did I allow others to control me?
Why coudn't I say "no" on so many occasions? Why did I listen others thinking they have more knowledge ,and why did I trust them? ... And I am learning to accept EVERYTHING ,including my feelings, beacause this is the only way to be able to move forward.
So I keep on going,I can't give it up.
 
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