Feeling disinterested in things that once amused me

[Celena Johnson]

Hello everyone and good evening!

There has been some feelings I have been pushing to the side because I figured they would go away (yeah...right). Recently I have noticed a growing disinterest in a wide variety of things that I once was at least content with, things such as: video games, current music, movies.
I have found that in the past few months I have been feeling myself try to enjoy things a twenty something should enjoy. TRYING. I reached out to some friends with my feelings and I was encouraged to share on the forum. I was reluctant at first because I couldn't really see any way my sharing a feeling of disinterest would be of use to anyone. Almost like with everything going on and the real issues that need to be discussed are most important and who wants to take up time?

Anywho i will try to describe how I have been feeling in relation to my surroundings and the work in general. Have you ever fealt so consumed by trying to find what's nutritious for the brain (knowledge) that empty carbs (current music, movies etc) are a waste of time...almost taboo? I have been feeling a pull away from anything that will not do my brain good, and I mean anything. My job is okay and I don't mind being there, and just then my lack of interest creeps up...not in a lazy way...just saying "hey, do you know what you could be doing, how about that article on vaccines on sott?? Isn't this tedious? You know you're becoming mighty mechanical right now". Funny voice, reminding me that outside of this box that is the charade known as the US, real things are occurring that need my attention and time. I do enjoy music still, however I have been jumping back a few generations from the 90's and my taste has become more instrumental and calming. Today's music won't cut it, it almost comical and a waste of time.

In short I could care less about anything and I keep encountering this feeling as far as empty carbs go. The feeling has gotten to a point so strong I can hardly tolerate the distractions of the charade and I become extremely anxious.

I have no way around it and after speaking with my friends for a bit, I realized this feeling is myself slowly waking up, and the knowledge I am working to gain and understand is shaping my perception of my surroundings. I definitely need to incorporate some pipe breathing before the feeling starts to bubble anxiety.

I hope this helps anyone beginning this journey, you are not alone. If anyone else has fealt this (I'm sure most have) please comment with any techniques to ease this feeling. I have found taking a fifteen at work and reading some news (sott and the forum) to feel like I'm not forgetting myself and letting life's distractions sweep me away.

Thank you for reading

 

[Buddy]

[quote author=celenajohnson23​]
I have no way around it and after speaking with my friends for a bit, I realized this feeling is myself slowly waking up, and the knowledge I am working to gain and understand is shaping my perception of my surroundings. I definitely need to incorporate some pipe breathing before the feeling starts to bubble anxiety.[/quote]

Remarkably perceptive, IMO. This reads like a completely natural process as I have come to understand it, although others could have different views.

While in an addictive, sleeping kind of mindset, we find a certain set of things interesting and another set of things (and people) boring. Conversely, when coming off addictions generally, some of the things we found previously boring or uninteresting become interesting and the old interesting things become uninteresting.

Careful though, because previous friends and acquaintances could start flipping you into their boring column or otherwise begin to think of you as being strange or something.

Another thing to consider is not to generalize across sets of experiences and come to believe that NOTHING is interesting or that everything is boring, because that could be a sign that an older more familiar mind set is trying to pull you back. Keep it new and different! :)

Just my view.

 

[Celena Johnson]

[quote author=celenajohnson23​]
I have no way around it and after speaking with my friends for a bit, I realized this feeling is myself slowly waking up, and the knowledge I am working to gain and understand is shaping my perception of my surroundings. I definitely need to incorporate some pipe breathing before the feeling starts to bubble anxiety.

Remarkably perceptive, IMO. This reads like a completely natural process as I have come to understand it, although others could have different views.

While in an addictive, sleeping kind of mindset, we find a certain set of things interesting and another set of things (and people) boring. Conversely, when coming off addictions generally, some of the things we found previously boring or uninteresting become interesting and the old interesting things become uninteresting.

Careful though, because previous friends and acquaintances could start flipping you into their boring column or otherwise begin to think of you as being strange or something.

Another thing to consider is not to generalize across sets of experiences and come to believe that NOTHING is interesting or that everything is boring, because that could be a sign that an older more familiar mind set is trying to pull you back. Keep it new and different! :)

Just my view.


[/quote]

Generalization is definitely something I need not to do. I don't want to end up not trying anything new because I'm expecting the same feeling. I can't predict a reaction based off of a general premise some things becoming uninteresting.
Definitely keep it new and different!!!

Thank you for the suggestion Buddy
I really did not consider that I was spreading the feeling of disinterest across the board. I don't want to block myself in, or invite any pre work comfortable habbits

 

[Celena Johnson]

Generalizing my feeling across the board could be feeding my anxiety as well...hmmm

 

[Buddy]

It's too easy to build anxiety by thinking about it. All that thinking and worrying has physical components. You know that red-faced, gut churning, flushed feeling you can get from being embarrased or when someone says something to cause that kind of reaction in you? That's a sign of how deeply words connect to our neuro-semantic/evaluative network. Words have power to effect our body and thinking and worrying in words is no different. I wasn't saying you were doing that to yourself although there is a sentence in your post that suggests it...I'm just offering a caution.

 

[Joe]

I hope this helps anyone beginning this journey, you are not alone. If anyone else has fealt this (I'm sure most have) please comment with any techniques to ease this feeling. I have found taking a fifteen at work and reading some news (sott and the forum) to feel like I'm not forgetting myself and letting life's distractions sweep me away.

Hi Celena, I think this is definitely a positive development, and unless it is really disturbing to you, I'm not sure it's a good idea to try and do anything to ease this feeling, because it is probably just an adjustment in your thinking that will take a little time. If you are feeling really anxious, you could try some gaba from time to time. But as you mention, EE/pipe breathing is a great way to relax your system.

You might find our radio show last Sunday interesting if you have the time.

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/sottradionetwork/2016/01/31/staying-sane-in-a-world-gone-mad

Btw, out of interest, are you taking iodine?

 

[Celena Johnson]

Joe;

I hope this helps anyone beginning this journey, you are not alone. If anyone else has fealt this (I'm sure most have) please comment with any techniques to ease this feeling. I have found taking a fifteen at work and reading some news (sott and the forum) to feel like I'm not forgetting myself and letting life's distractions sweep me away.

Hi Celena, I think this is definitely a positive development, and unless it is really disturbing to you, I'm not sure it's a good idea to try and do anything to ease this feeling, because it is probably just an adjustment in your thinking that will take a little time. If you are feeling really anxious, you could try some gaba from time to time. But as you mention, EE/pipe breathing is a great way to relax your system.

Btw, out of interest, are you taking iodine?

I actually didn't think that way! This type of adjustment in thinking DOES NOT need easing just time and more learning along the way. I guess it was a reaction to the discomfort; my mind was at ease and comfortable I suppose (and asleep). Im not too bothered but the feeling is noticeable. Just like people grow into their ears, I must grow into whatever knowledge I have gained. Actually trying to ease the feeling could hinder the process. Hmm.

Thank you Joe for the insight. I will always have time for the radio show. I will listen at work (I just type)
And I am currently taking 150mg of lugol's solution at 2% as well as goldenseal

 

[Joe]

I actually didn't think that way! This type of adjustment in thinking DOES NOT need easing just time and more learning along the way. I guess it was a reaction to the discomfort; my mind was at ease and comfortable I suppose (and asleep). Im not too bothered but the feeling is noticeable. Just like people grow into their ears, I must grow into whatever knowledge I have gained. Actually trying to ease the feeling could hinder the process. Hmm.

Yep, and you can trust in that process, and help it along by giving your mind and emotions and body what they need.

And I am currently taking 150mg of lugol's solution at 2% as well as goldenseal

I see, well, on the iodine thread your experience is rather similar to many other members', so it seems the detox effects of the iodine, which tends to move fluoride and other halides out of the brain (pineal, pituitary etc.) can produce the symptoms you describe. So it's all good!

 

[Celena Johnson]

Im going to read back through the iodine thread again. Fetox is good for the body so I need to roll with the puches and keep up the detox! A well needed look at myself was provided from this thread so thank you everyone for your time. I have only been using the solution for a month or so, goldenseal for years. I should have guessed feelings and hormones would begin flowing and that in turn effects mood, and my observations of my surroundings. I am going to begin some reading on narcissism and families. I need my knowledge and my development to be on the same page. Probably why I spazzed to begin with LOL

 

[Joe]

Hi Celena, it's pretty normal to be concerned about new states like this, after all, they're new! :D Good idea on looking at aids to detox (don't forget milk thistle for the liver) and also some 'detox' for the mind and emotions in the form of reading pertinent books. The Narcissistic Family is a good one if you haven't read it yet. Keep us posted!

 

[pinkfreud]

Hello, celena! It's encouraging to see your reaction to joe's insight. Rather than shove this kind of discomfort under the rug, we can all dig in together
I think pipe breath is critical for getting through the day. I also find balance can be maintained with spontaneous connections, kind of a "pay it forward" deal. It keeps me from becoming a detached "covert narcissist" and I hope it keeps people out there with fewer sources for kindness and togetherness from losing hope in humanity all together.
Find music that speaks to you and never stop analyzing why it speaks to you.
Find a balance between fiction and non-fiction to keep your mind realistic and your empathy alive.
That's the best advice I can offer at this time. Oh, and always remember : you are not alone!

 

[PhoenixToEmber]

There has been some feelings I have been pushing to the side because I figured they would go away (yeah...right). Recently I have noticed a growing disinterest in a wide variety of things that I once was at least content with, things such as: video games, current music, movies.
I have found that in the past few months I have been feeling myself try to enjoy things a twenty something should enjoy. TRYING. I reached out to some friends with my feelings and I was encouraged to share on the forum. I was reluctant at first because I couldn't really see any way my sharing a feeling of disinterest would be of use to anyone. Almost like with everything going on and the real issues that need to be discussed are most important and who wants to take up time?

Glad you took our advice and shared. :) Although you think sharing your feelings of disinterest for things you once enjoyed and now find trivial isn't of use to anyone, I think it's the opposite - the fact that mundane and mindless parts of culture are no longer interesting you is a good sign. I'm sure many people here, myself included, have gone through this period of disillusionment, and that others will be going through a similar stage soon if not already. So sharing these thoughts and feelings are useful to those of us who've gone through it to remind us others still are - that it's a part of the waking up process - and useful to those who are still going through it or haven't yet to see this is not uncommon when we begin to value knowledge more and more. When knowledge comes to the forefront, these things begin to take a backseat naturally.

Anywho i will try to describe how I have been feeling in relation to my surroundings and the work in general. Have you ever fealt so consumed by trying to find what's nutritious for the brain (knowledge) that empty carbs (current music, movies etc) are a waste of time...almost taboo? I have been feeling a pull away from anything that will not do my brain good, and I mean anything. My job is okay and I don't mind being there, and just then my lack of interest creeps up...not in a lazy way...just saying "hey, do you know what you could be doing, how about that article on vaccines on sott?? Isn't this tedious? You know you're becoming mighty mechanical right now". Funny voice, reminding me that outside of this box that is the charade known as the US, real things are occurring that need my attention and time. I do enjoy music still, however I have been jumping back a few generations from the 90's and my taste has become more instrumental and calming. Today's music won't cut it, it almost comical and a waste of time.

In short I could care less about anything and I keep encountering this feeling as far as empty carbs go. The feeling has gotten to a point so strong I can hardly tolerate the distractions of the charade and I become extremely anxious.

I still go through this anxiety sometimes as well, but it was more so in high school and college than now. Over the years, it began to bother me less, and now I tend to look at all of it in more of a curious way than through the lens of annoyance. I often see the trappings of culture, entertainment, and distractions that the majority engage in as a giant circus, and the psychopaths in power are the ring masters dangling the spectacle before us hoping we will stay entranced. And, of course, in the more esoteric perspective, the ring masters are on puppet strings and are themselves dangled from 4D STS masters. The creeping thought that "real things are occurring that need my attention and time" is one I struggle with everyday when going to work and spending so much time on making enough money to survive, and being exhausted and stressed much of the time because of that, when I just wish I could devote all my energy to research and disseminating information to those seeking it. Focusing on this feeling is also what helped me kick my pot-smoking habit, because more and more I had to face the truth that it sucked a lot of that attention and time away that I should've been devoting to the "real things".

I have no way around it and after speaking with my friends for a bit, I realized this feeling is myself slowly waking up, and the knowledge I am working to gain and understand is shaping my perception of my surroundings. I definitely need to incorporate some pipe breathing before the feeling starts to bubble anxiety.

It is indeed a sign of waking up, of incorporating your knowledge into your being, which will inevitably shift your perspective and align it more with objective reality. When that happens, it is always uncomfortable. Pipe breathing helps. I also have to get better at using it when my emotions take over. Lately my emotional outbursts have been more related to anger, frustration, and a sense of urgency surrounding my current living situation, as well as working so hard with very little financial income to show for it.

I hope this helps anyone beginning this journey, you are not alone. If anyone else has fealt this (I'm sure most have) please comment with any techniques to ease this feeling. I have found taking a fifteen at work and reading some news (sott and the forum) to feel like I'm not forgetting myself and letting life's distractions sweep me away.

Writing always helps - not just on the forum, but personal writing. Maybe a poem or a journal entry. And as I said to you on FB, perhaps learning a new skill to express your emotions, like playing an instrument or singing, where you can vent.

 

[KJN]

It’s a process that takes place when we find truth and reason through a new or startling concept or a heightened awareness. It is one of realization and adaptation to this new input. It moves our “set point” (for lack of a better image) and we view and experience things through a revised lens. When this new perspective becomes normal for us, the old perspective and parameters begin to fade. We then are out of synch with our old self and the mental/emotional/maybe even physical surroundings we once enjoyed.

Even though we can visit those old trappings, we become aware that that place is no longer where our soul or energy belongs. It a changing of reality and an adaptation to a new frequency and domain that keeps up with our quest for knowledge and truth — if we invite it to do so, and are cognizant and supportive of the dynamic. Relax, breathe, look around…you are in a new place within yourself and that is an accomplishment!

 

[MusicMan]

Hello celenajohnson23, I just want you to know that your thread is speaking to me on a deep level as are the responses you have received. I haven't been able to articulate this myself, but I'm glad that you and the others have.
Thankyou all.

 

[Celena Johnson]

Thank you all for your insight again. I am amazed every time at the amount of support I have received on this forum.

Hello, celena! It's encouraging to see your reaction to joe's insight. Rather than shove this kind of discomfort under the rug, we can all dig in together
I think pipe breath is critical for getting through the day. I also find balance can be maintained with spontaneous connections, kind of a "pay it forward" deal. It keeps me from becoming a detached "covert narcissist" and I hope it keeps people out there with fewer sources for kindness and togetherness from losing hope in humanity all together.
Find music that speaks to you and never stop analyzing why it speaks to you.
Find a balance between fiction and non-fiction to keep your mind realistic and your empathy alive.
That's the best advice I can offer at this time. Oh, and always remember : you are not alone!

Definitely. And listening to the talk radio show shared byJoe, really helped with the idea of friction. Working on a balance both physically and mentally!

There has been some feelings I have been pushing to the side because I figured they would go away (yeah...right). Recently I have noticed a growing disinterest in a wide variety of things that I once was at least content with, things such as: video games, current music, movies.
I have found that in the past few months I have been feeling myself try to enjoy things a twenty something should enjoy. TRYING. I reached out to some friends with my feelings and I was encouraged to share on the forum. I was reluctant at first because I couldn't really see any way my sharing a feeling of disinterest would be of use to anyone. Almost like with everything going on and the real issues that need to be discussed are most important and who wants to take up time?

Glad you took our advice and shared. :) Although you think sharing your feelings of disinterest for things you once enjoyed and now find trivial isn't of use to anyone, I think it's the opposite - the fact that mundane and mindless parts of culture are no longer interesting you is a good sign. I'm sure many people here, myself included, have gone through this period of disillusionment, and that others will be going through a similar stage soon if not already. So sharing these thoughts and feelings are useful to those of us who've gone through it to remind us others still are - that it's a part of the waking up process - and useful to those who are still going through it or haven't yet to see this is not uncommon when we begin to value knowledge more and more. When knowledge comes to the forefront, these things begin to take a backseat naturally.

Anywho i will try to describe how I have been feeling in relation to my surroundings and the work in general. Have you ever fealt so consumed by trying to find what's nutritious for the brain (knowledge) that empty carbs (current music, movies etc) are a waste of time...almost taboo? I have been feeling a pull away from anything that will not do my brain good, and I mean anything. My job is okay and I don't mind being there, and just then my lack of interest creeps up...not in a lazy way...just saying "hey, do you know what you could be doing, how about that article on vaccines on sott?? Isn't this tedious? You know you're becoming mighty mechanical right now". Funny voice, reminding me that outside of this box that is the charade known as the US, real things are occurring that need my attention and time. I do enjoy music still, however I have been jumping back a few generations from the 90's and my taste has become more instrumental and calming. Today's music won't cut it, it almost comical and a waste of time.

In short I could care less about anything and I keep encountering this feeling as far as empty carbs go. The feeling has gotten to a point so strong I can hardly tolerate the distractions of the charade and I become extremely anxious.

I still go through this anxiety sometimes as well, but it was more so in high school and college than now. Over the years, it began to bother me less, and now I tend to look at all of it in more of a curious way than through the lens of annoyance. I often see the trappings of culture, entertainment, and distractions that the majority engage in as a giant circus, and the psychopaths in power are the ring masters dangling the spectacle before us hoping we will stay entranced. And, of course, in the more esoteric perspective, the ring masters are on puppet strings and are themselves dangled from 4D STS masters. The creeping thought that "real things are occurring that need my attention and time" is one I struggle with everyday when going to work and spending so much time on making enough money to survive, and being exhausted and stressed much of the time because of that, when I just wish I could devote all my energy to research and disseminating information to those seeking it. Focusing on this feeling is also what helped me kick my pot-smoking habit, because more and more I had to face the truth that it sucked a lot of that attention and time away that I should've been devoting to the "real things".

I have no way around it and after speaking with my friends for a bit, I realized this feeling is myself slowly waking up, and the knowledge I am working to gain and understand is shaping my perception of my surroundings. I definitely need to incorporate some pipe breathing before the feeling starts to bubble anxiety.

It is indeed a sign of waking up, of incorporating your knowledge into your being, which will inevitably shift your perspective and align it more with objective reality. When that happens, it is always uncomfortable. Pipe breathing helps. I also have to get better at using it when my emotions take over. Lately my emotional outbursts have been more related to anger, frustration, and a sense of urgency surrounding my current living situation, as well as working so hard with very little financial income to show for it.

I hope this helps anyone beginning this journey, you are not alone. If anyone else has fealt this (I'm sure most have) please comment with any techniques to ease this feeling. I have found taking a fifteen at work and reading some news (sott and the forum) to feel like I'm not forgetting myself and letting life's distractions sweep me away.

Writing always helps - not just on the forum, but personal writing. Maybe a poem or a journal entry. And as I said to you on FB, perhaps learning a new skill to express your emotions, like playing an instrument or singing, where you can vent.

Writing definitely helps and honestly I can agree with the pot habit has become less interesting. Its about time I give it up. Masking the anxiety of the friction doesn't help and I feel like that's what occurring. Sapping of energy. I have grow accustomed to singing at work to keep me upbeat.
I cannot and will not push away any advice that is sound and leads me to think. What's the point otherwise?
Thank you everyone!!!