doublea1535
Jedi Council Member
About 1 month ago I dreamt I was back in an area I lived in as a pre-teen/teenager with my mother. It is a rural area in the foothills of the Sandia Mountains in New Mexico. I was in the backyard, surrounded by a fence on 3 sides and my "mother" on the 4th side. Except this lady who somehow seemed to be my mother did not really seem like my mother at all. I do not recall a face, but remember a tall dark figure, casting a long shadow. I got from her a very evil impression. Inside this fenced area was grass (which would be very out of place for the desert area my dream took place in). I remember fleeing this fenced-in area (away from my "mother") only to retreat into an even smaller fenced in area, surrounded on all 4 sides. The grass in this area was lusher and greener than in the previous area. There was a man there, he was tall, about 6', blonde hair, blue eyes, and pale skin. He was somewhat stout with a wide face. Interestingly about this is that I saw his face clearly in my dream, and it was not a face I can remember ever seeing before. He was staring at me quite intently. Somehow, his look was both negative and positive at the same time. I got the distinct impression that he was holding me back. He was not, and would not try to physically restrain me, but yet I felt he was holding me in this fenced-in area. I left this area and remember seeing myself from the 3rd person walking up a path, up a hill. Except that in my dreams I can never run with my legs, and always resort to moving myself about with my hands; imagine how a double-amputee (outside of a wheelchair) with no legs might move about. The road I walked up is an actual road, very close to the house I used to live in. Whereas the backyard did not exist in real life as it did in my dream.
I thought about it and decided that this "mother" figure was probably not a representation of my real mother, as there are several instances in real life where instead of holding me back, she has gone out of her way and assisted me with moving forward in my life. The blonde man was curious though, especially given the clarity with which I saw his face. I thought about it, and there is only one person in real life that I know of that resembles this person. Reflecting further, it could be said that I allow(ed) this individual to "hold me back" by constantly engaging with him in time-wasting exercises, partying, etc. A couple of weeks after this dream I had a conversation with this friend and told him the dream, and some other aspects of our relationship that bothered me. I told him that I could not hang out with him anymore (in reality, I told him I could not hang out with him for awhile, but my true intention was that I would not hang out with him anymore at all). He took it quite well. This conversation opened the door for me to discuss the EE program with him. We went through the Introduction DVD, and I made copies of the discs for him. I told him if he ever wanted to do the exercises again he should call me up, otherwise to not.
Other points of interest: During the period of my life in which I lived in this area, I would constantly move back and forth between my parents, which were divorced at the time. My father once remarked "Everytime you come back from your mom's house you get sick". Another point is that in this house I had the worst nightmare of my entire life (that I can recall). This nightmare made me terrified, in the true sense of the word. I have a few times in my life felt close to death and been frightened by it, but nothing in my life before or after this nightmare comes close to the terror I remember feeling. After the dream, I woke with a start and had the feeling that some "things" were floating/flying around me. I went upstairs and it seemed like they followed me. Eventually I went back to sleep and remember nothing further about that. Last point of interest is that I do not generally remember my dreams.
I welcome any comments or feedback. Thank you for reading. :)
I thought about it and decided that this "mother" figure was probably not a representation of my real mother, as there are several instances in real life where instead of holding me back, she has gone out of her way and assisted me with moving forward in my life. The blonde man was curious though, especially given the clarity with which I saw his face. I thought about it, and there is only one person in real life that I know of that resembles this person. Reflecting further, it could be said that I allow(ed) this individual to "hold me back" by constantly engaging with him in time-wasting exercises, partying, etc. A couple of weeks after this dream I had a conversation with this friend and told him the dream, and some other aspects of our relationship that bothered me. I told him that I could not hang out with him anymore (in reality, I told him I could not hang out with him for awhile, but my true intention was that I would not hang out with him anymore at all). He took it quite well. This conversation opened the door for me to discuss the EE program with him. We went through the Introduction DVD, and I made copies of the discs for him. I told him if he ever wanted to do the exercises again he should call me up, otherwise to not.
Other points of interest: During the period of my life in which I lived in this area, I would constantly move back and forth between my parents, which were divorced at the time. My father once remarked "Everytime you come back from your mom's house you get sick". Another point is that in this house I had the worst nightmare of my entire life (that I can recall). This nightmare made me terrified, in the true sense of the word. I have a few times in my life felt close to death and been frightened by it, but nothing in my life before or after this nightmare comes close to the terror I remember feeling. After the dream, I woke with a start and had the feeling that some "things" were floating/flying around me. I went upstairs and it seemed like they followed me. Eventually I went back to sleep and remember nothing further about that. Last point of interest is that I do not generally remember my dreams.
I welcome any comments or feedback. Thank you for reading. :)
