Grief- lettre to Claude, my friend, my husband

[sebbe]

A living thought for you, Lydia.

 

[loreta]

Oh that is such a beautiful letter, very touching. I have tears reading that too.
Claude feels so gentle and kind, you look very happy together. He has a beautiful smile - you do too!

I love what you inscribed on his beautiful azure stone...
and the tenderness of your words to Claude...
and that such a beautiful tree led you to your sweet home that held you both, witnessing your highs and lows and all the in-betweens.

Claude loves you, and you love him - no matter what challenges there may have been between you at times. Challenge is normal and honestly I think it is healthy to have this at times, it means you are being honest with yourselves and one another; if you are paying attention to the friction and deeper wounds, you grow in knowledge of self and other. He was a teacher for you in many ways, and you for him. Although he is not physically here now, the lessons continue to flow, but in different forms.

I have no doubt whatsoever that when it is your time, Claude will be there to embrace you: shining from the inside out and smiling his beautiful smile and you will both laugh heartily at your 3D selves. For now, you both need time to rest, heal and each tentatively explore your new reality. I am glad you have your darling doggies, they would have known this was coming and would be doing all they can to be of gentle comfort to you.

Thank you for your words, they touched me deeply. Yes, we had some difficult times together, but despite everything, I stayed by his side, through thick and thin. All couples go through tough times, and I broke plates and cups, but we stayed together. The storms and tempests between us have seemingly vanished from my mind and heart, leaving only love and tenderness. Grief is a difficult stage, but dogs, who are great teachers, are a balm, bringing wisdom, comfort, and love. And there are books too, these great friends, and also prayer, where I pray for Claude and for myself, asking my guides to help me find my way. When someone you love has passed away, you feel lost in a vast forest. I ask my guides to lead me through this forest as gently as possible.

Thank you all for your prayers and your presence.

 

[Chu]

What a beautiful homage and moving words, dear Loreta! Thank you for sharing. If you felt such a tender moment with him, it probably means he was there, telling you it was okay. 40 years together, in spite of differences and obstacles, makes me feel pretty certain that he DOES forgive you, just as you probably forgive HIM. And now you have memories to treasure.

You may go through a roller-coaster of emotions, from anger at the injustice of him not being there, to sadness, grief, etc. But as long as you don't bottle stuff up, it's all normal!!! And he will be there. I found it beautiful how you gave him freedom to move on. So many people refuse to do that, but it is an act of love.

 

[Alana]

That was beautiful, Loreta. Thank you for sharing with us.

Reading your words, one of my favorite songs started playing in my head:

It's got to be more than flesh and bone
All that you've loved is all you own
[...]
I'm gonna take it with me when I go ~ Tom Waits

 

[loreta]

That was beautiful, Loreta. Thank you for sharing with us.

Reading your words, one of my favorite songs started playing in my head:

I like Tom Waits, he has a beautiful voice.

 

[loreta]

What a beautiful homage and moving words, dear Loreta! Thank you for sharing. If you felt such a tender moment with him, it probably means he was there, telling you it was okay. 40 years together, in spite of differences and obstacles, makes me feel pretty certain that he DOES forgive you, just as you probably forgive HIM. And now you have memories to treasure.

You may go through a roller-coaster of emotions, from anger at the injustice of him not being there, to sadness, grief, etc. But as long as you don't bottle stuff up, it's all normal!!! And he will be there. I found it beautiful how you gave him freedom to move on. So many people refuse to do that, but it is an act of love.

True, a real rollercoaster, Putin-style. Or Stalin-style. But I'm an energetic woman, even though I've barely eaten or drunk anything for the past month. Little by little. Claude is helping me sort out some important paperwork for my survival, all on my own. He'll always be there, anyway. I talk to him and ask him to guide me; he was always calm in the face of difficult situations, I'd even say stoic. I trust the spirits that are with him.

It hurts, yes. Only love is eternal. So I'll continue in love until we meet again.

Thank you for your words. I've started eating again, slowly, and drinking. My dogs too.

 

[ryu]

Dear Loreta, that was a beautiful letter you wrote, thank you for sharing it with us.
I am sure Claude is doing well and you two will see each other again one day🕊

 

[palestine]

even though I've barely eaten or drunk anything for the past month

Hello @loreta!

All my sincere encouragements of best. Force for you to overcome whatever! A heart, too, because it's always mandatory: