Is there still time

[Corvus]

I have been in contact for longer time with one women who is strong STO psychic, that is she can read people and their past and future if they ask, she is my friend in fact, she does not pay her services but gives freely, also she had not very pleasant experiences with those STS psychics. One also had ability to knock people down from balance and also she told about her past lives which she remembers but it is personal stuff so I ll live it there.

When I asked her about a future she saw herself as becoming light. She also said she is in contact with Cs, I think she is channeling them directly, that is becoming future self. She had also negative experiences with men in black, that is lizards, one apparently attacking her in her house. I asked her about my future because she did get it right about me, being very weird for surrounding some past "relationship" and my family. She gets pictures and feelings of persons she reads and can determine their orientation. So I have asked about my future and from what I understand it was kind of symbolic image she got. She saw a kid with brown hair(my hair is brown) playing with ball, being happy and disappearing in light, and there was one older women with like she said pretty face and black hair in roman like clothing by the well looking bemused or thoughtful. Peculiar thing is that I am myself more attracted to brunette women. She said I am leaving this place either I die or live and that will travel a lot in the "future".

I have also asked about parents and sister and her child( she is pregnant almost 5 months now and I was kind of after hearing for pregnancy gargling marbles, after everything I tried to say about future felt on deaf ears but it is her choice not mine but when you think about child and it s future, karma, does not bring pleasant feelings). The reading about child was that it will first be good then not good and for parents she did not want to say but I knew what that meant, did not need a reading to see where it was going. Either way I did not took it to seriously because future is not set. Lately I have been distracted by looking for job and other lesser things and did not prioritize certain things as much I wanted, and feel in a way it is to late plus info from latest session, just want to know is there still time?

 

[Niall]

Is there still time for what?

If I were you, I would focus on the "lesser things".

 

[angelburst29]

Hi Corvinus,

It didn't happen over night but somewhere in this process of life, I decided to live each moment, as it was given, for it's individual experience and have tried to intergrate the lessons learned - in going forward. In some cases, I've been able to share some of those experiences.

"Going forward" and "future" are hard to define, for it's fluid and open to expression but there's probabilities. To what the future might hold - individually and as a species, as a whole, we only play a small part on the playing field of life on this planet. Each of us has an opportunity to help and support other's in our environment, hopefully, for the best interest's of our species.

It all boils down to helping "self" first, by acquiring knowledge, about self and the world around us. How can you help anyone, let alone yourself, if you haven't built up a knowledge base to be able to conscientiously respond, in any given circumstance?

At one point, I was overwhelmed with deliberating fear and anieity, at what I perceived around me and the Social State of Affairs. I feared, mostly for my Family, for it was never my maternal intent, to bring children into this world, to be harmed, degraded and limited in their expressions of talent and inherent personalities - for someone else's screwed up ideology and mind-set. I looked upon my children, as their guardian/ protector and instructor in survival and navigator in their stages of life.

When the "true reality" of our existence came into full focus, a deep depression over shadowed my World. It was beyond any type of pain I had ever experienced, for it was internal and void of any expression. My world and time stopped, enveloped in a thick black fog of hopelessness, with nowhere to turn. It took months, for the survival instinct to surface and pull me out of the pit of dispare. I choose "Life" and I was going to live it - to the best of my ability, no matter what obstacles were thrown in my way. It takes a lot of work "on self" to pick up the pieces, discard what doesn't work and search for the options, that do. What you learn, you share, even if it's - only by example. You take each moment, as a blessing, for it adds to the experiences "learned and earned."

I no longer fear the future, for I live it, one moment at a time, as an expression of Life. When the time comes for me to cross over, I'll still be working my end of the deal! Hopefully, my family will follow my example, in their own way.

What I have come to know as internal instinct and working my way through the maze of life, was hard to express into words and the feelings behind them, UNTIL I came across a website and woman from Florida, who had a "gift" of expressing exactly what I felt and speaking on subjects, few could comprehend, let alone take the time to contemplate. Since I have come across Laura's "Work" and those with the Chateau,
Life has had new meaning and I can go forward into the future - living Life, as it was intended! One lesson at a time.

 

[Corvus]

When the "true reality" of our existence came into full focus, a deep depression over shadowed my World.

I am no stranger to the work mam, I was there and pain was beyond everything experienced before, I learned to deal more less with physical but psychologically it was very hard in beginning because I set rules from start such as no sex, tv, movies, alcohol, some foods, trying to be 24 hours conscious, exercising and meditating every day, reading, that was even before ee was introduced, it was though, I am a type of person who does things 100 per cent or does not do it at all(doing sports for most of my life from young age was helpful because it builds your will so you can apply it easily in other areas, but that was one hell I went through. Odds were never in my favor. I remember I had to have 2 trainings a day and school and did not have time to even eat, and after being totally physically finished I had to learn at 11 pm in evening to 3 pm in morning or even to morning, almost every day for 8 years, not even having time for nothing else, my life was mostly book and gym, parents were harsh(but they are good in their essence, souled individuals) so were pupils, feeding environment, had all a s in high school and finished college, and all that trouble so I could not find work so had to find work in other fields in which I could work with high school, is not t life funny in a way? but it was beneficial in will that built me physically and intellectually and preparing the ground for the work(but ti also builds your false self because of highly competitive environment), but if I had to do that all over, especially as a kid when you are vulnerable no way, in the end I was left with black whole in myself feeling totally empty until I found transcripts that were like blessing to my soul and everything started to have sense and purpose) but I continued with very intensive and got to the level while I was very weird for surrounding but also did fully understand latter what was Gurdijeff saying because I got to some stages not even knowing i was until I got in touch with his work that describes the process, and I got there fast , two years, process was fast because my dedication was great, I even got rid of all my fears and fear of death.

That was some 6 years ago and attacks were steadily increasing, especially from closest to me, but I felt great and like nothing could stop me but then like it goes I forget about pain which got me on this journey and there was the lure of other side- psychic power but each time I betrayed myself one part of me was gone and all the work I done melted away, and inner power, then came depression, guilt and other things so I started to find some exists and some habits returned and emotional reactions and I became stuck like fly in the net not really knowing that I was falling, it is like a fog that envelops your brains. The thing was even harder because I was all alone and there was nobody around, but also my essence is that of loner having trouble connecting to another people, I do not easily open up because I learned to keep thing for myself. What I found is that even those that should help you are nowhere near when needed, even from some sto candidates on other forums that are easily prone to judgments, and that was something I learned also then to accept things as they are, people as they are because judging others is judging yourself and creation. those who judge are those who have never been in that kind of situation they are judging, therefore have no inner reference from which to show compassion. Either way it was my second fall and my advice is never look back once on the road because it is hard to go back on your feet again, in my case not so much because of lack of will but because of lack of faith which was the product of environment where I was raised when still I was a child, the chains that bind us from childhood . Then came guilt and asking for a second chance and forgiveness from universe that I am looking for and that was the reason I came here, but harder still to forgive myself for betraying myself, sometimes it seems like suffering has no end for some people. This is basically my life story and a lesson from which everybody can learn. I put my cards on the table and was not honest from the beginning of whole story so if you do not want me here I understand because probably I do not deserve to be here.

I looked upon my children, as their guardian/ protector and instructor in survival and navigator in their stages of life.

Then mam they are very lucky and one day they ll see it and be very grateful, in this or in next life.

 

[irjO]

I'd say corvinus that don't worry about if "there is still time" i think you should worry about what are you doing right know in your life! Don't sit there and wait for the Universe to take care of things.. When will that happen? Who knows.. So..

 

[angelburst29]

Quote from: Corvinus

I put my cards on the table and was not honest from the beginning of whole story so if you do not want me here I understand because probably I do not deserve to be here.


We learn from every path we take. The information at this site is at your finger tips, much, if not all of it, through hard pain staking hours of work. It's here - for those who truely seek knowledge and "truth."

There's still t-i-m-e.

 

[l apprenti de forgeron]

Agree with you, angelburst29.
I think there is still time to make efforts and supra-efforts to learn the truth. Patiently, to capture it as best we can, to take the best possible knowledge in this incarnation, on our destiny journey for eternity. But on the other side, there is not much time to waste on nonsense. As trivial relations, companies that not add anything to us and vice versa, that don't care about the issues shared here.
So, reals efforts to merge our selves and not fragmenting the be, prevent tragically disintegrating. I think it might be like choosing to evolutionary branch we follow: ascending or descending. And not choosing is also a choice.

 

[Niall]

those who judge are those who have never been in that kind of situation they are judging, therefore have no inner reference from which to show compassion...

...if you do not want me here I understand because probably I do not deserve to be here.

Corvinus, have you seen the forum thread about 'depression as a stepping stone'? Here's the text of the original QFS article: http://cassiopaea.org/forum/index.php?topic=2832.msg76821#msg76821

We've seen a few people 'run out of time' because they either believed they were themselves directly channelling the Cs, or they believed someone who claimed to be doing so. In one way or another this prevented them from networking here, like you're doing now. Perhaps they came to believe that there was no need to because they were instead 'receiving higher truths directly'?

Closed relationships lead to feedback loops that reinforce illusions about ourselves and never end well for the sincere seeker. But if you're making continuous efforts to grow in knowledge within an open community of others working towards the same aim, you are far less likely to be harmed by inaccurate information or inaccurate interpretation of information.

Have you read some of the threads in the cognitive sciences board, particularly The Adaptive Unconscious? Here's another example of how our self-assessments are usually wide of the mark:

Do Others Judge Us as Harshly as We Think? Overestimating the Impact of Our Failures, Shortcomings, and Mishaps

http://psych.cornell.edu/sites/default/files/Sav.Epley_.Gilo_.pdf

[...] Just as people tend to overestimate the extent to which others notice their blunders, we propose that they also expect to be judged more harshly because of these blunders than is actually the case.

The prediction that individuals will overestimate the extent to which they are judged harshly by others may strike some readers as unlikely, given that people often are judged harshly for their shortcomings. Indeed, a large literature in social psychology attests to observers' tendencies to form strong dispositional inferences about others, often on the basis of the flimsiest behavioural evidence. People are notoriously inclined to jump from "acts to dispositions" without giving adequate consideration to mitigating situational constraints.

Still, we suggest that observers are less likely to form negative impressions that actors typically suspect. We base this prediction, in part, on recent evidence suggesting that actors anticipate that observers will draw correspondent inferences about them - that individuals are intuitively aware of the correspondence bias. This research also demonstrates that the judgements actors anticipate go well beyond those that observers actually make. Not only do actors anticipate that observers will exhibit a correspondence bias, they expect them to do so more than they actually do. [...]

 

[Buddy]

That was some 6 years ago and attacks were steadily increasing, especially from closest to me, but I felt great and like nothing could stop me but then like it goes I forget about pain which got me on this journey and there was the lure of other side- psychic power but each time I betrayed myself one part of me was gone and all the work I done melted away, and inner power, then came depression, guilt and other things so I started to find some exists and some habits returned and emotional reactions and I became stuck like fly in the net not really knowing that I was falling, it is like a fog that envelops your brains. The thing was even harder because I was all alone and there was nobody around, but also my essence is that of loner having trouble connecting to another people, I do not easily open up because I learned to keep thing for myself. What I found is that even those that should help you are nowhere near when needed, even from some sto candidates on other forums that are easily prone to judgments, and that was something I learned also then to accept things as they are, people as they are because judging others is judging yourself and creation. those who judge are those who have never been in that kind of situation they are judging, therefore have no inner reference from which to show compassion. Either way it was my second fall and my advice is never look back once on the road because it is hard to go back on your feet again, in my case not so much because of lack of will but because of lack of faith which was the product of environment where I was raised when still I was a child, the chains that bind us from childhood . Then came guilt and asking for a second chance and forgiveness from universe that I am looking for and that was the reason I came here, but harder still to forgive myself for betraying myself, sometimes it seems like suffering has no end for some people.

I don't seem to have much to say these days, but I always, or often, feel moved to support someone when they feel down. I could be wrong about this, so FWIW, here's my interpretation:

It looks to me like you were doing fine more or less until you gave into the temptation to feel great - like nothing could stop you. Probably that was an easy lure for you since it may have linked directly to a sense of entitlement - like you had earned that judgment. We all have our different weaknesses that can be exploited. From that point on though, it was the predator's mind that betrayed You. You were offered a "deserved" feeling of being unstoppable. When you accepted it the rest of the strategy came into play to bring you down to show you that you Are stoppable.

That was a bastard move! A painful, yet valuable lesson in humility, wasn't it?

It is remarkable that you felt guilty and asked for forgiveness. So many others would probably cover their feeling of shame and work overtime self-justifying whatever their sellout consisted of. You didn't do that.

Instead, you let yourself feel what you feel without making up a story to excuse yourself. For that reason I don't see how you would not deserve to be here. You seem to have a great deal of strength and determination. Maybe that's why it took so much work to bring you down.

I think that if you must ask forgiveness, ask with your feet. Just put one foot in front of another and try to pick up at some point where you left off if it's not too much for you. I suspect the entire universe will reorganize itself, if necessary, to accommodate that kind of demonstration of will.

 

[Diane]

Corvinus, I agree with Buddy. You are an amazing, strong person. Thank you for sharing your story. They say there's time, yet I notice myself moving more rapidly through lessons. Not sure if that's due to running out of time, or just where I am in terms of working on myself.

It looks to me like you were doing fine more or less until you gave into the temptation to feel great - like nothing could stop you. Probably that was an easy lure for you since it may have linked directly to a sense of entitlement - like you had earned that judgment. We all have our different weaknesses that can be exploited. From that point on though, it was the predator's mind that betrayed You. You were offered a "deserved" feeling of being unstoppable. When you accepted it the rest of the strategy came into play to bring you down to show you that you Are stoppable.

Buddy, thank you for putting that into words. I just went through something in my own life, and it was quite the smack down. I was getting to where I thought there wasn't anything that could surprise me, that nothing that was thrown at me could make me feel intense fear. I should have knocked on wood after thinking those thoughts. The good thing is that I recognized exactly what was happening, (kind of like oh crap, here we go, buckle the seat belt), and I reacted not by running and hiding from it, but by facing it head on and taking action against it. Lesson learned, but the effects of that intense fear has lingering effects. I'm working on it.

 

[Corvus]

Corvinus, have you seen the forum thread about 'depression as a stepping stone'? Here's the text of the original QFS article: http://cassiopaea.org/forum/index.php?topic=2832.msg76821#msg76821

No, I did not, I will read it.

Have you read some of the threads in the cognitive sciences board, particularly The Adaptive Unconscious? Here's another example of how our self-assessments are usually wide of the mark:

I meant more of people who talked about other path, more intensive sts from their perspective and how it is "wrong", I more tend to see it as it is - part of creation, judging it is judging myself because I was also there but in it s less intensive state, and maybe in more intensive in some of the great cycles, who I am really to judge somebody else and deny them their free will. People when do mishaps tend to run from their responsibility and divert attention to others so they do not have to face what they did, their feelings, their mishaps, it did happen to me so I understand the meaning of citation, only way out is to be fully conscious all times as much as possible because from what I observed even small things that escape observation can make a hole from which the attack can come as was a case in this forum and others many times. People doing work for some time as I did tend to build image of some status and greater importance that that becomes a basis for their downfall, maybe a good thing to have on mind is far one progresses more work is needed no less as is often the case with human satisfaction. Gurdijeff was probably aware of that when he said that from those who give more, more is needed.

We've seen a few people 'run out of time' because they either believed they were themselves directly channelling the Cs, or they believed someone who claimed to be doing so. In one way or another this prevented them from networking here, like you're doing now. Perhaps they came to believe that there was no need to because they were instead 'receiving higher truths directly'?

I know those new age gurus and had a chance to be called to dark and pessimistic but with this one friend it is not really the case. She is an older person and from what I noticed she was very true to positive way of life and from what I have seen for long time, and was a very helpful to me and gave hope and comfort. I lost contact recently because I did maintain it through social network connection, needed some time of but when I went back she left, she thought it was very feeding environment and energy draining( that it is hopeless to inform people any more because no one was listening) before I left but maybe because I was also of having hard time she was thinking I would not be back, but do not think so, she follows her own path. She would join forum but does not know English language.

A painful, yet valuable lesson in humility, wasn't it?

Yes, it was.

Corvinus, I agree with Buddy. You are an amazing, strong person. Thank you for sharing your story. They say there's time, yet I notice myself moving more rapidly through lessons. Not sure if that's due to running out of time, or just where I am in terms of working on myself.

I do not see myself as strong, one who are really strong are Laura and many others here on forum and sott who worked for many years to inform people, Laura doing it over 40 years, so these are the men and women who deserve deep bow and I can not even probably grasp yet how much was their work helpful for others and me, and that was the reason why she was chosen for this mission. But she probably does not see herself that way, probably does what she must because that is who she and others are, there is no really choice, on one way there is eternal emptiness and on the other conscious suffering, and that is the only thing that can bring peace. Even the strongest dogs break under the torture but for what was done here it was needed exceptional will, will of thousands men.

Thank you all for your comments, I am very grateful for your inputs and time, I hope I can repay all the information one day, I shed tear or to reading it while smoking my pipe, these few last days I have been crying a lot, releasing myself, I was always very sensitive but had difficulties expressing myself and who I was because I could not really open myself nowhere where I would be accepted because big boys do "not" cry and it is seen by the society a sign of "weakness", but there is no purpose in denying who and what I am. It was a silly question I asked when looked from right perspective but it does not matter in the end, journey always continues, in this or in next life, only thing I have is this moment, right here, right now. Thank you all again.

 

[wanderingthomas]

One should not worry about time.

Don't be entrapped in linear time, fearful and constantly looking into the future.

Things are the way they are because they have to be that way right now according to many variables. If you have started now to wake up simply keep your pace optimal. If you should have waken up earlier you would have. Simply go with your natural tempo.

Don't rush things. Learn and grow as much as you can (if that is your choice) within the situation you are in.

And, have faith.

But not faith as in belief. But faith as in knowing that if you live according and close to the truth and what you see based on objective knowledge and not assumptions that then everything will "fall into place" optimally. Or, rather that if you stay open, attentive to objective reality and Truth you let the best possible of the outcomes to unfold.

The Cs said something like: It is not important where you are, but who you are and what you see.

 

[Corvus]

Don't rush things. Learn and grow as much as you can (if that is your choice) within the situation you are in.

And, have faith.

Yes, I tend to rush things and control outcome, have to learn to be more fluid and balanced. Thanks.

 

[Corvus]

We've seen a few people 'run out of time' because they either believed they were themselves directly channelling the Cs, or they believed someone who claimed to be doing so. In one way or another this prevented them from networking here, like you're doing now. Perhaps they came to believe that there was no need to because they were instead 'receiving higher truths directly'?

Just want to say that today I broke contact with that above mentioned psychic women, she returned back couple a days ago and I was glad to share some information with her as my friend but one thing get stuck in my eye that changed the whole communication. She started talking about her past relationship with some psychic guy who she said was psychopath and that had psychic powers, something like telekinesis or paralysis(he could struck person down, person just fell but could stand up after that, probably something with person s balance center). After she found who he was really, pathological or psychopath I can not tell for sure, she left him and he married and got kids but was harassing her for 10 years.

He would call her on phone and hang up during these 10 year period until she had enough and sent her friend who was knocked down psychologically by her ex but when her friend got up he used physical force and her ex run but it did not stop him. He continued harassing her(and her close ones) as from what I understood attacked in the same way just I am not sure if it was prior or after her friend s action. Then she threatened him and he stopped. She threatened him to hurt his kids and wife and this was the reason why he stopped. I asked maybe he was not psychopath because he cared for his children but then she said it was only so they could care about him in older age. I though it makes sense but I do not have all the details to come to definite conclusion, either way he was very pathological person if not being a psychopath. I want to clarify why she did not ask court justice, firstly because of financial reasons and secondly because of him being a liar and would get a way probably with ease. Thirdly, courts are not interested in justice one bit but only money. One example is that my sister had a car accident recently and the guy who hit her and was responsible called his friend who was not there to come as a witness and they all lied in front of officers and judge that she was guilty one. Court decided that my sister and the guy who hit her must both pay penalty. My sister decided to push further and she filed complaint about first verdict and now is waiting for second verdict. But things do not look well, witnesses as one waitress that saw those two planning their story in the cafe bar and others witnesses do not want to be dragged on courts and because cases last forever. Going on court is not affordable because pie is less worthy then table she is on. Even if you get the case most money goes to lawyer and courts just want to suck as much money because state is falling apart economically for over last 20 years. So I just wanted to say how legal way is not really the best option.

But that one thing she mentioned was that threat to his children and wife, but I asked her did she meant it seriously(I can understand if there was no intention and was just false threat to scare him because there was no other option and there is law of three). She said she did and I asked her if she would hurt innocent children and wife if he hurt some of her family and she said yes. And you can conclude what was my reaction, using film analogy"it was not the path of jedi", it was pure revenge punishable under criminal law as such, but it was not even assault on the one responsible which I could understand, but on innocent people that were not probably conscious who was their father or husband. Hatred brings new hatred and circle of hatred and revenge is in that way never finished if ones involved do not put an end to it. One newer movie which is good example of that is Place beyond the pines. I just though someone as her could understand that easily and saw she was very emotionally attached and tried to say how others see us better in that kind of situation and can give feedback. She was running from subject and we were going all the time in a circle then I decided to stop it because I saw it has no sense, she even said I was defending him and telling her to stay victim( I said self defense is good but she was not registering it) but it was not about him at all but about her and her thought s about this whole situation. It could be easily described as cognitive dissonance in a way because same thing I noticed when talking to my sister about some things, again it is all circling and projection.

Either way as I saw no purpose in further discussion I said good luck on your path and that I do not want to have any more contact if she thinks revenge against innocent people is a good way to get even if necessary(luckily threat worked and he stopped). To me it seems maybe the emotional impulses from her side were high because of emotional trauma but she can not be helped if she does not first see herself. She said I have to learn a lot, what do I think that on 4D there was going to be sunshine and rainbows against lizards(something like that). I, if I even get there, would not surly use force against little children, were they hostile or not, lizard like or not, because that is a main difference between sto way of life and sts way of life. No one said the sto way is easier and from my point of view better to be broken in body then in spirit, because there is nothing to live for after that. Funny though is that she said how many of those psychics are negative and have some kind of traumas they carry from childhood, she probably had many contacts with those psychics and reikists that scared her in a way from what I see. She organized from what she said some kind of workgroups of paleo-christianity(she said she got message that she was paleochristian in visions even before it was revived by this group)and did not asked for any money but women that was in charge with her,( even if she sensed that she was negative, thought that she can help her) took all the money from her from donations(that she intended to give to her friends) and latter spread lies about her. She learned from that experience much about others.

This whole situation came as a surprise, I never expected that from her and there was also some emotional attachment so... But in the end I am not entirely sure in anything anymore when it comes to trusting others. It seems I am again "lonely" cowboy on my own. Any feedback is appreciated.