My kitty is gone

[aaronfransen]

This weekend my wife and I had to put our kitty of 15 years down.

It was the most horrible thing I've ever experienced. We knew she had liver cancer, but the rate of decline was staggering. In one moment she went from normal (albeit slower) to completely unable to control herself. Vet suspects organ failure and/or a stroke, but it was utterly heartbreaking to see and hold her. She was a rag doll; conscious, but unable to control her muscles or her bowels.

She was suffering so horribly, we felt putting her down was the only humane thing to do. We were with her until the end (and for quite a while after).

Horrible horrible horrible. We both cried for two days, and it's a struggle to not cry now. We lost our little girl. We never had human children, so she was our surrogate child.

(If the C's ever felt like giving some personal info, I would love to know that she's okay!)

Anyway, just wanted to share. Talking/writing about it seems to help. Thanks for listening folks.

 

[Jacques]

I'm so sorry for your loss LostSpirit. It is in fact a very difficult thing to do but you took the right decision.
Be sure that your kitty was lucky to have both of you. Sha has been loved.

Big hugs to both of you.

 

[lilyalic]

Sorry for your loss Lost Spirit, it's never easy losing a beloved animal companion

Just remember you made the best decision for her.

 

[Dirgni]

In 2011 my cat did not want to eat and drink any more and she just tried to get into a hiding place most probably to wait to die. So I decided to let her put down by her vet. It was a sad experience. So I can imagine how this is for you.

It is never easy to let a beloved (furry) family member go and it was a humane decision to put your cat down. Otherwise she would have suffered more IMO. Mourning a family member is normal. You gave her a good home and loved her. She will be in your memory and your hearts.

 

[aaronfransen]

Thanks Dirgni, Lilyalic and Gandalf.

Memories (and photos) are all we have now. I kind of kick myself for not taking more videos of her over the years.

But I guess at the same time if we started watching them there would be a whole new round of tears.

I still have doubts about whether it was the right thing, but thank you all for your words of encouragement. I'll probably always have those doubts, just because it's such a traumatic thing to do. I think you're all correct...letting her suffer would have been the worse evil.

 

[Andrew]

So sorry for your loss, Lost Spirit. My condolences to you and your Wife.

 

[Learner]

I am very sorry for what you and your wife are going through at the moment, Lost Spirit. And I can only imagine how hard and horrible this might be. It was a very difficult decision you both had to make, but I also think it was the right thing to do. Looking back at the situation of your kitty, you ultimately did what was best for her.

Your situation reminded me of this thread, because it also involves a pet and deals with this very question you currently have doubts about though the specifics are different. Maybe it helps.

And you can always write here if you feel the need to.

You and your wife are in my thoughts

Edit: Sentences added

 

[Cleo]

Sorry for the loss of your kitty, Lost Spirit. I also had to put down my family's cat this year, it was a sudden decision too due to our cat's declining condition. I remember the doubts as well, especially afterwards..a part of the processing it seems. As others have said, you made the best decision for your beloved animal friend.

 

[BrendaH]

Hi Lost Spirit, I'm so sorry for your loss, IMO you've made the best decision for her, our pets become like family for us, I have 10 cats and I love them so much and because of that, if I ever see any of them in a terminal pain I would make the same decision as you.

 

[Aliana]

So sorry for the loss of your kitty, Lost Spirit. It’s a tough decision to have to put a beloved pet down even when you know it’s the most humane decision. We had to do the same for my mom’s diabetic cat earlier this year and it was heartbreaking though we knew we did not want him to suffer anymore.

You are in my thoughts.

 

[Chrissy]

I'm sorry for the loss of your kitty, Lost Spirit. I'm sure she realized how much you loved her. I understand your grief and the questioning of whether you made the right decision. We had to put our dog to sleep a few weeks ago and I still feel like something's missing. I guess it's only natural when you spend that long with someone. Even though they are pets, they are still family and we love them. Roxie was almost 15, had cancer, and severe arthritis in her back hips. At times, she still did her playful puppy dance when she was outside so we really weren't thinking it was her time yet. She woke up at 2am one morning disoriented, falling, and banging into walls. The vet said she had vestibular syndrome and with her current health, rehabilitation would be a long, hard road for her. We decided it would be more humane to put her to sleep. As you said, it was horrible and at first I was kind of angry that she had to go out suffering. She was a very sweet dog who never bothered a soul. It all happened so fast and even though I had been telling myself she was slowing down, I still wasn't prepared. I can say now, that the pain has dulled a little and when I think of her, it's of the happy times we had with her in the yard fetching balls and sled riding. I know it's hard, but give it a little time. It does get better. You and your wife are in my thoughts.

 

[Bluefyre]

I'm sorry for your loss Lost Spirit. I lost one of cat companions to cancer in August. It was so sudden and tore me apart, I was totally unprepared. He was 16. He was like a ragdoll as well, his intestines blocked with cancer. Then my doggie two weeks later. I was as prepare for that as any of us can be because she was declining. I still feel the absence, the quiet, the finality of no more of her snoring in her bed at night or both of them greeting me at the door when I get home from work. I have three other cats, but there is a big hole. I think I will miss them always and have all of the memories in my heart. I cried a lot and now the sadness is mixed with the happy memories. It takes time and my heart goes out to you both. Animals have no fear of dying, they know where they go when they leave their bodies. Maybe it's my imagination, but I heard both of them say "I'm free! I can run! No more pain!" Whenever my thought turn to them I thank them for sharing their lives with me, it was such a privilege.

 

[loreta]

My sincere condolences, Lost Spirit. It is so sad when a cat or a dog we love so much, are part of our lives, leave us. There is no consolation for this lost, maybe just acceptance, with time and patience, of the destiny of our loved animals. The time we are with them are so short but ours on this planet also. We are here just a little bit to love and suffer. And also to meet these fantastic creatures, our dogs and cats or any animal, that help us to help them and help us in a circle of love and compassion. Take care.

 

[Thebull]

Very sorry to hear of the loss of your companion Lost Spirit. It's a very sad moment when they have to leave us and you made a difficult decision to let her go.

I hope your pain will soon turn to the happy memories you have had together, mich love to you all.

 

[Laura]

I'm very sorry to hear this, LS. I think that you can feel confident that your kitty is still with you as our Sebastian stayed with us after his passing. When there is great devotion and long term companionship, I think our pets benefit spiritually as we do.

It is a very good thing that you made the decision you did and I am sure kitty thanks you, and thanks you for being there right to the end and beyond. I know exactly how you feel.

Big hugs.