A
abeofarrell
Guest
I came to this forum as recommended by Laura. I contacted her first through facebook and she said that the forums would be a better place for me to share, so here I am and here I go.
To be perfectly honest with you, as you will soon understand from my background, I am worried about being judged. In particular, when I see dietary advice, breathing methods, a "fellowship", and also clear boundaries between what consists STS or STO behaviour. But I am willing to be open and trust others.
First of all, I have no recognition of seeing a UFO, nor have I recall of any abduction event or close encounter with GREY. Ever since I was a small child I have believed in UFOs and aliens though. I remember playing games pretending I was possessed by and alien to spook out my friends, that was in about the 6th year of elementary school.
I was brought up in a catholic family and when I was a teenager left the church. In high school I started doing buddhist meditation, about 2 hours or more a day. Then in university I was "converted" to become a born again pentacostal christian. I joined a church which when thinking back now I believe was more like a cult. Very strict. I even became a missionary for them in China for 4 years.
Returning from China I realized I was believing a pack of lies so I dropped everything and started to think about my life. Then I came to Japan. I have been here for 8 years now. I am a permanent resident and have a family here.
My interest in UFOs etc did not abate, and I spent hours on youtube watching videos on a wide range of topics. Finally I found out about the Cassiopeans and Laura and found my way here.
As I work through all the ideas here I find daily I feel nauseated, exhausted, and easily get massive headaches. I do not know if this is opposition to me awakening or just shock?? What do you think?
I also use tarot cards for divining, mostly with the purpose of spiritual growth. Does anyone have any (non-religious) opinions on this? I do not believe these cards are enough to reach a high level STO being. I use them to contact my higher self through syncronicity.
Two anomalies I have experienced:
1. When I was about 11 i was chased around my grandmother's house by a HEAD. The head of a man around 50 years old who had an angry face. I presumed it was a ghost at the time. It lasted around 10 minutes and was accompanied by a strange smell, a feeling of the room growing larger, the inability to shout out (though I could move), and also the two doors leaving the room could not be open though they had no locks.
2. Not long after coming to Japan I lived in a cheap apartment with a high bed. The bed's height was about a meter. Under the bed was storage. I dreamt of being attacked by some evil being then I woke up on the floor next to the bed in great pain, with many wounds. I presume I only fell from bed, but there is a guard to stop falling, and i have never fallen out of bed before. While in that apartment, even before this event, I had horrible dreams and waking nightmares every day . . . who knows. Probably nothing.
My number one concern now is to gain in knowledge and also seek slowly introduce good practices to my family.
Thank you for listening. I welcome any responses.
Abe
To be perfectly honest with you, as you will soon understand from my background, I am worried about being judged. In particular, when I see dietary advice, breathing methods, a "fellowship", and also clear boundaries between what consists STS or STO behaviour. But I am willing to be open and trust others.
First of all, I have no recognition of seeing a UFO, nor have I recall of any abduction event or close encounter with GREY. Ever since I was a small child I have believed in UFOs and aliens though. I remember playing games pretending I was possessed by and alien to spook out my friends, that was in about the 6th year of elementary school.
I was brought up in a catholic family and when I was a teenager left the church. In high school I started doing buddhist meditation, about 2 hours or more a day. Then in university I was "converted" to become a born again pentacostal christian. I joined a church which when thinking back now I believe was more like a cult. Very strict. I even became a missionary for them in China for 4 years.
Returning from China I realized I was believing a pack of lies so I dropped everything and started to think about my life. Then I came to Japan. I have been here for 8 years now. I am a permanent resident and have a family here.
My interest in UFOs etc did not abate, and I spent hours on youtube watching videos on a wide range of topics. Finally I found out about the Cassiopeans and Laura and found my way here.
As I work through all the ideas here I find daily I feel nauseated, exhausted, and easily get massive headaches. I do not know if this is opposition to me awakening or just shock?? What do you think?
I also use tarot cards for divining, mostly with the purpose of spiritual growth. Does anyone have any (non-religious) opinions on this? I do not believe these cards are enough to reach a high level STO being. I use them to contact my higher self through syncronicity.
Two anomalies I have experienced:
1. When I was about 11 i was chased around my grandmother's house by a HEAD. The head of a man around 50 years old who had an angry face. I presumed it was a ghost at the time. It lasted around 10 minutes and was accompanied by a strange smell, a feeling of the room growing larger, the inability to shout out (though I could move), and also the two doors leaving the room could not be open though they had no locks.
2. Not long after coming to Japan I lived in a cheap apartment with a high bed. The bed's height was about a meter. Under the bed was storage. I dreamt of being attacked by some evil being then I woke up on the floor next to the bed in great pain, with many wounds. I presume I only fell from bed, but there is a guard to stop falling, and i have never fallen out of bed before. While in that apartment, even before this event, I had horrible dreams and waking nightmares every day . . . who knows. Probably nothing.
My number one concern now is to gain in knowledge and also seek slowly introduce good practices to my family.
Thank you for listening. I welcome any responses.
Abe
