New Positive Experiences

[Smallwood]

At the risk of sounding like the creepiest person ever, my predator has a telltale sign of a clown (in my dreams it is always portrayed as such). Can you describe what the black magician looked like?

I hope I'm just seeing things that aren't there.

 

[EmeraldHope]

Smallwood, when he morphed into the clown, I was looking at the top of his head and all I can really say is that the hair , which was normal, started to change into "Bozo" hair and he became skinny and goofy looking, as opposed to to initial image of a strong forceful male dressed in black, with a hood and he had dark hair.

The clown aspect was very important to me because I understood it to mean he had no power unless I chose to believe the lie- he was weak and silly and the "black magician" was a mirage or mask- like the man behind the curtain in the Wizard of Oz.





edited for spelling

 

[Avi]

hi Emerald Hope,

Thank-you for sharing, hearing about a positive experience really goes a long way. :)

Some things you said which caught my attention:

I was a wholesale mortgage acount executive and worked for a couple of Wall Street Firms. I made very good money. I started waking up around the same time everything was changing on the secondary market. My career collapse with the industry happened at the same time with my recongnition that I could not do it any longer. I was a very good sales person. When I started seeing all of the lies in that fiasco it almost killed me. Since I walked away in 2006, I have not been able to find a job nor have I had a clue what to do. I have been in sales all of my life and do not know anything else. The problem is, it is the fake me that is good at it. It doesn't fit anymore. I have been living off what was left and doing some work on the side but I have to move forward. I downsized to a tiny apartment and my bills are very low now so hopefully I can figure out what to do next since this block has shifted. I have been spending most of my focus the last couple of years on working on myself and learning. Everytime I have gotten up something has happened to knock me down. Hopefully that will get a little bit better.

I am in a similar boat. Not with a mortgage background rather project manager with design engineering firms, top firms that make boatloads of money in the war profiteering and disaster management contracts. I walked away in 2008, well, was fired actually, but walked away without a fight, for asking too many questions and in general not being the type who is willing to tow the line and do what I am told just because I am told to do so.

Everything came to a head, finally, when I noticed the firm was placing overhead on a government contract (federal tax-payer dollars) - which is illegal - and talked to an accountant about this. Within a week they let me go. I was a bit naive about it all, not documenting things, conversations, printing the financial reports, etc, but to be honest at that time I wanted to be released because I could see more and more how inhumane, mechanical and plain greedy the corporation is. In short, life was miserable even though on paper and by society standards I had it "made". Kind of ironic that I brought the contract to the firm and then when having a sense of standards and fiscal responsibility, well, they showed their loyalties, didn't they? To the "almighty" dollar!

At any rate, I can relate, had to downsize and all that. The problem is that, like you, I still have not been able to find a job nor have a clue what I should be doing.

It also seems that we ex mortgage people are being blackballed in some way. Most all of my ex coworkers are having the same issue.

I have often thought this myself, but think it is more than that, more like the times we are living in. This is not to say there is not some truth to it, perhaps blackballing really happens, after all I have, quite literally, hundreds of resumes out there with maybe 3-4 interviews and most of those are not what I wish to do, i.e. sell insurance, sell cars, sell some other stupid thing we do not need, and sales is not for me, from experience. But the point is that I made it very clear what I thought of corporations and the whole disaster management fiasco when leaving that industry and so now, even IF I wanted to return to such a line of work, and eat some major crow, the doors are closed.

Anyways, dont mean to hi-jack your thread, just to share a bit and thank-you for writing about an uplifting experience! It does give hope.

With kind regards.

 

[Psalehesost]

At the risk of sounding like the creepiest person ever, [...]

Not to worry - I also found EmeraldHope's posting helpful in part by seeing the "clown" in my predator.

The clown [...] had no power unless I chose to believe the lie- he was weak and silly and the "black magician" was a mirage or mask- like the man behind the curtain in the Wizard of Oz.

So it seems to work, the predator. It believes in itself - it, our machine. And so it reigns, until unmasked. After which it will quickly try to re-mask itself.

On the theme of what anart replied here, how the mechanical self cannot touch the real self, the imagery you described in your dream following the attack made me think of how the predator cannot really touch what is Real - it is inaccessible, unmanipulable, inviolable.

So it goes both within and without, it seems - the predator can no more feed on what is Real within someone else than within the self. When the Real enters the picture, the predator is rendered powerless.

 

[EmeraldHope]

hi Emerald Hope,

Thank-you for sharing, hearing about a positive experience really goes a long way. :)

Some things you said which caught my attention:

I was a wholesale mortgage acount executive and worked for a couple of Wall Street Firms. I made very good money. I started waking up around the same time everything was changing on the secondary market. My career collapse with the industry happened at the same time with my recongnition that I could not do it any longer. I was a very good sales person. When I started seeing all of the lies in that fiasco it almost killed me. Since I walked away in 2006, I have not been able to find a job nor have I had a clue what to do. I have been in sales all of my life and do not know anything else. The problem is, it is the fake me that is good at it. It doesn't fit anymore. I have been living off what was left and doing some work on the side but I have to move forward. I downsized to a tiny apartment and my bills are very low now so hopefully I can figure out what to do next since this block has shifted. I have been spending most of my focus the last couple of years on working on myself and learning. Everytime I have gotten up something has happened to knock me down. Hopefully that will get a little bit better.

I am in a similar boat. Not with a mortgage background rather project manager with design engineering firms, top firms that make boatloads of money in the war profiteering and disaster management contracts. I walked away in 2008, well, was fired actually, but walked away without a fight, for asking too many questions and in general not being the type who is willing to tow the line and do what I am told just because I am told to do so.

Everything came to a head, finally, when I noticed the firm was placing overhead on a government contract (federal tax-payer dollars) - which is illegal - and talked to an accountant about this. Within a week they let me go. I was a bit naive about it all, not documenting things, conversations, printing the financial reports, etc, but to be honest at that time I wanted to be released because I could see more and more how inhumane, mechanical and plain greedy the corporation is. In short, life was miserable even though on paper and by society standards I had it "made". Kind of ironic that I brought the contract to the firm and then when having a sense of standards and fiscal responsibility, well, they showed their loyalties, didn't they? To the "almighty" dollar!

At any rate, I can relate, had to downsize and all that. The problem is that, like you, I still have not been able to find a job nor have a clue what I should be doing.

It also seems that we ex mortgage people are being blackballed in some way. Most all of my ex coworkers are having the same issue.

I have often thought this myself, but think it is more than that, more like the times we are living in. This is not to say there is not some truth to it, perhaps blackballing really happens, after all I have, quite literally, hundreds of resumes out there with maybe 3-4 interviews and most of those are not what I wish to do, i.e. sell insurance, sell cars, sell some other stupid thing we do not need, and sales is not for me, from experience. But the point is that I made it very clear what I thought of corporations and the whole disaster management fiasco when leaving that industry and so now, even IF I wanted to return to such a line of work, and eat some major crow, the doors are closed.

Anyways, dont mean to hi-jack your thread, just to share a bit and thank-you for writing about an uplifting experience! It does give hope.

With kind regards.

Thanks for sharing. I am sorry you are in the same boat. I do not know if blackballing is as prevelenet now, but it has been in the past. Ads that said mortgage professionals need not apply, feedback from headhunters saying the same thing, also evidenced here in this huge thread on one of our industry forums: _http://forum.ml-implode.com/viewtopic.php?t=1283&highlight=blackballed

The thought of ever going back to that makes me sick. I was so disgusted when I walked away. It was very intense watching that house of cards build and collapse from the inside. The scary thing is that all of those toxic derivitives are still out there. I would guess the amount outstanding due to leverage is in the quadrillions, so understand there are not enough physical assests or currency in the world to cover the losses. I was paralyzed for a year from just understanding that. It was a year and a half before the mainstream news even started talking about it and even now they do not discuss the elephant in the room which is the toxic black hole of derivitives.

It is a shame because a business to business skill set is the same for the most part in any vertical- only the product changes. I worked sixteen hour days oftentimes and was always in the top twenty percent of the companies I worked for and typically made the Top Sales awards trips. Now no one will touch me. Insurance was an option, but it is a house of cards as well due to the heavy investment in MBS, and I am pretty sure the " healthcare bill" is a way to float them a while longer. Think AIG . Then on the other end of the pole, just basic jobs will not hire me because they say I am overqualified, lol.

I have thought about going back to school but I have no idea for what, and I am forty one so that feels a bit uneasy to me. And, I am going to need income very soon anyway, sooner that it would take me to get a degree. So I do feel your pain. I really do. Going from six figures to zero overnight is a rollercoaster ride from Hades. My saving grace is that I have never been really materialistic. I have seen this this loss totally destroy ex coworkers whose whole identity was wrapped up in how much they made.



edited- spelling

 

[anart]

On the theme of what anart replied here, how the mechanical self cannot touch the real self, the imagery you described in your dream following the attack made me think of how the predator cannot really touch what is Real - it is inaccessible, unmanipulable, inviolable.

So it goes both within and without, it seems - the predator can no more feed on what is Real within someone else than within the self. When the Real enters the picture, the predator is rendered powerless.

I'm not quite sure how you came to that conclusion from what I wrote. It's not my understanding that 'the predator' cannot feed within. In fact, the reason most people are left so tired and drained day in and day out is due to their own predator (programs and illusions) draining their energy - energy that could be put to good use elsewhere. It takes enormous amounts of energy to maintain an internal illusion - this in itself is 'the predator feeding'. I'm not sure if that helps clarify or not, but hopefully it's not confused the issue further.

 

[Psalehesost]

I'm not quite sure how you came to that conclusion from what I wrote. It's not my understanding that 'the predator' cannot feed within. In fact, the reason most people are left so tired and drained day in and day out is due to their own predator (programs and illusions) draining their energy - energy that could be put to good use elsewhere. It takes enormous amounts of energy to maintain an internal illusion - this in itself is 'the predator feeding'. I'm not sure if that helps clarify or not, but hopefully it's not confused the issue further.

But when it feeds within, is it feeding on the higher self, or is it the machine zapping itself?

By "the Real within", I mean higher self. Perhaps some confusion also comes from me viewing the predator, for as long as it takes the place of a genuine driver, as including functionally - by extension - the whole machine. In either case regarding the latter, my interpretation is false if those energy reserves fed upon are part of the higher self and not the machine.

 

[anart]

I'm not quite sure how you came to that conclusion from what I wrote. It's not my understanding that 'the predator' cannot feed within. In fact, the reason most people are left so tired and drained day in and day out is due to their own predator (programs and illusions) draining their energy - energy that could be put to good use elsewhere. It takes enormous amounts of energy to maintain an internal illusion - this in itself is 'the predator feeding'. I'm not sure if that helps clarify or not, but hopefully it's not confused the issue further.

But when it feeds within, is it feeding on the higher self, or is it the machine zapping itself?

By "the Real within", I mean higher self. Perhaps some confusion also comes from me viewing the predator, for as long as it takes the place of a genuine driver, as including functionally - by extension - the whole machine. In either case regarding the latter, my interpretation is false if those energy reserves fed upon are part of the higher self and not the machine.

I'm afraid I'm not quite following you.

Not everyone has a higher self, yet everyone has programs and illusions (the predator). Everyone has physical/emotional/mental energy that is drained by propping up illusions about the self and the world and by running programs. I don't think the 'higher self' - if present - necessarily has to enter into the discussion - merely because for the vast majority of people, the 'higher self' is present only in potential - until - they remove the barriers/lies/illusions/myriad of I's that prevent the 'higher self' from directly connecting and interacting with the lower centers.

I don't really have much of an answer other than that, though, and, as always, this answer may be incorrect. Perhaps others have more/different input that might make more sense.

 

[EmeraldHope]

I'm not quite sure how you came to that conclusion from what I wrote. It's not my understanding that 'the predator' cannot feed within. In fact, the reason most people are left so tired and drained day in and day out is due to their own predator (programs and illusions) draining their energy - energy that could be put to good use elsewhere. It takes enormous amounts of energy to maintain an internal illusion - this in itself is 'the predator feeding'. I'm not sure if that helps clarify or not, but hopefully it's not confused the issue further.

But when it feeds within, is it feeding on the higher self, or is it the machine zapping itself?

By "the Real within", I mean higher self. Perhaps some confusion also comes from me viewing the predator, for as long as it takes the place of a genuine driver, as including functionally - by extension - the whole machine. In either case regarding the latter, my interpretation is false if those energy reserves fed upon are part of the higher self and not the machine.

From what I have come to understand lately, the higher self seating and access to 4th dimension is not possible until certain chemistry and vibratory rate is activated in the brain to produce it. Due to issues with the prefrontal cortex, some people do not have the ability to do this. ( Think Neanderthal, psychopaths, OP ). In the past few days I have been reading a lot on neuroscience and neurophilosophy which addresses these concepts from that point. Their approach to the 3 brain being is from the reptilian, mammalian, and neomammalian brain. Until all fire in a certain pattern the frequency to seat the higher self isn't possible. This is another way of looking at the alchemical process which I found to be helpful. The predator is unconsciousness, programs and lies. Ours subconscious holds the truth and opposing ideas of the the lies we hold onto internally. It is draining because it is a constant battle to keep consciousness separated from the unconsciousness. Most programs and illusions support the functions of the reptilian brain, which drives are food, sex, territory, attack,etc. The reptilian brain is predatory. In essence though, the machine is " zapping itself" because the programs and illusions have produced a faulty circuit causing the one frontal lobe to become more active than the other. One lobe produces the more negative emotions in the limbic system and the other lobe the more peaceful and positive. The process of correcting all of these things consciously ,working through them, adding to the knowledge base, and developing critical thinking and reason, builds certain circuitry through all of the regions of the brain and alllows the higher aspects to come into play. I will give you a couple of links to give you an idea. Keep in mind though they are just a different view of the principles we are working with here and how they relate to the brain. Keep in mind also it is just to enhance what we are working with here not to replace it. Also bear in mind that some of the conclusions and perceptions drawn from authors ,researchers, and scientists may be biased or lacking in crucial information or in some cases just plain wrong. If you take some of the reference points of the brain from the two articles and look them up separately and in regard to neuroscience you get a bigger pictures still. It helped me to get a better understanding of the basis for the actual tangible systems we are working with in here, although Laura goes beyond this. If anyone sees in errors in what I am saying please correct me as I have just started looking into this.


_http://clinicallypsyched.com/neurotheologywithgodinmind/
_http://neuro.sofiatopia.org/brainmind_revolution.htm

 

[EmeraldHope]

To add to my post above, I found this in regards to this subject from FOTCM which may make what I was trying to say above a little more clear in regards to the inner predator, if taken in conjunction with the above links:


http://paleochristianity.org/documents/FOTCM_Statement_of_Principles.pdf

4.1. On Evolution of Emotion
We recognize that the roots of human evil, though originating at the Cosmic level, are primarily psychobiological in nature and a product of humanity‘s evolutionary history. The higher-level Second Density hominid species contribute substantially to humanity‘s biological substrate. As Second Density expresses the variations of Archetypes in genetic forms, therefore our instinctive-emotional substrate holds the roots of human evil. We recognize that emotions are the motivating energy behind normal human behavior, and that intellect is most often an instrument in their service, its fruit a product of the quality and calibration of the emotion directing it. The emotional-instinctive substrate of humanity, formed over millions of years of evolution, forms the instrument of human Consciousness and largely determines our social life, our family bonds, our sense of right and wrong, our sense of humanity, our potential for expressing our Conscience. However, just as the quality of an electrical system‘s wiring determines its ability to conduct current, our genetics and biology determine, and limit, the ―current‖ of our Consciousness. In the case of building blocks missing in the substrate, the extreme of psychopathy represents a near complete deficit of social emotions: trust, honor, love, compassion, empathy, care, duty, allegiance, respect, gratitude, justice. In contrast, the qualities of the psychopath, including cold-heartedness, a ―lying tongue‖, superficial charm, emotional manipulation, arrogance, self-centeredness, lack of remorse, and sadism, have all been known historically as qualities of Evil. The range of expressions of the instinctive substrate reflects the spectrum of Creation: Spirit and Matter, Creation and Destruction, Good and Evil. Psychopathy represents the epitome of human Evil, because psychopaths have the will to predation of the animal kingdom without the capacity for self-reference that belongs to the truly human estate.

 

[nwigal]

From what I have come to understand lately, the higher self seating and access to 4th dimension is not possible until certain chemistry and vibratory rate is activated in the brain to produce it.

Maybe these concepts of seating the higher self and access to higher realities should be separated somewhat. The seating of the higher self involves the Work, and choices. Accessing higher realities can just be a natural result of genetics, not always implying that those so gifted are anything but flukes, OSIT.

Ours subconscious holds the truth and opposing ideas of the the lies we hold onto internally. It is draining because it is a constant battle to keep consciousness separated from the unconsciousness.

Maybe the battle is to merge the truths from the inner and outer worlds, and to see the lies for what they are.

 

[EmeraldHope]

From what I have come to understand lately, the higher self seating and access to 4th dimension is not possible until certain chemistry and vibratory rate is activated in the brain to produce it.

Maybe these concepts of seating the higher self and access to higher realities should be separated somewhat. The seating of the higher self involves the Work, and choices. Accessing higher realities can just be a natural result of genetics, not always implying that those so gifted are anything but flukes, OSIT.

Ours subconscious holds the truth and opposing ideas of the the lies we hold onto internally. It is draining because it is a constant battle to keep consciousness separated from the unconsciousness.

Maybe the battle is to merge the truths from the inner and outer worlds, and to see the lies for what they are.

That is helpful clarification. I do know from reading Laura's work that anyone can manifest "psi abilities" and it has nothing to do with oreintation or character. Your way of saying merging the truth from inner and outer is more on target also for the point I was trying to make. however, from what I can gather also the subconcious takes in all data so it knows if we are running a program or lie. Hence the inner turmoil .

 

[RedFox]

You know ,this may be a possibility. I have been looking and looking at things to sell and in the end , the reason I have lost hope is that most of these things, in my opinion are fluff and bs or I do not believe in them at all in any way. Especially since my background is in finanical instruments. My really good friend is in the same boat with a sales and marketing background. We both want to be involved in things that help people- not hurt them . We are both very good marketers. I will say though that right now I do not feel comfortable enough in my ability yet to teach anyone EE, and unless I am incorrect it involves a trip to France to become certified which is in no way possible for me at the current moment. I would be interested in feedback though because if it is something that would be feasible it is in the ball park of what we are looking for and I know from experience it is helpful. You have me a little excited. I have been so stuck in this area.

What has knocked me down has manifested through other people mainly my son. He wrecked his car and now I am sharing mine with him until he can get another one so it has limited my work prospects at the moment to what I can do from home. He is 21. I have worked from a home office for years so it is no big deal but the options are very limited, compared to what they were. There is nothing in my prior field even if I wanted to do it. It also seems that we ex mortgage people are being blackballed in some way. Most all of my ex coworkers are having the same issue. Things also have broken out of the blue just when I had saved enough money to help him with the car. So I do get what you are saying.

My understanding is that to be able to teach the E-E program you have to first be a member of the FOTCM, and have been practicing the E-E program regularly along with detoxing/going on the elimination diet as best you can before you can be considered to be a teacher.
Their are several E-E teachers in America/Canada who could train you once you have reached that point osit.

 

[Psalehesost]

I'm afraid I'm not quite following you.

Here's how I think it went:

I posted thoughts that "the predator" couldn't touch or feed on "the Real" within. You seemed to interpret it as a statement that the predator cannot feed within, rather than it merely being limited to not feeding on "the Real". I saw two possibilities: 1. You meant to say that it does feed on what I called "the Real"; 2. My thoughts were not conveyed clearly.

So I made the last post to get the feedback that would determine which of these two it was. Though the point of it seems not to have been clearly communicated, you provided the answer:

Not everyone has a higher self, yet everyone has programs and illusions (the predator). Everyone has physical/emotional/mental energy that is drained by propping up illusions about the self and the world and by running programs. I don't think the 'higher self' - if present - necessarily has to enter into the discussion - merely because for the vast majority of people, the 'higher self' is present only in potential - until - they remove the barriers/lies/illusions/myriad of I's that prevent the 'higher self' from directly connecting and interacting with the lower centers.

That would seem to suggest that possibility #2 was the case.

Hopefully this combined with the previous reply gives context for the thoughts of the post of mine that started this confused mini-dialog.

Some somewhat semi-related thinking: What within is "Real", given the vague sense of "real" implied in referring the higher centers as being such? Is there more than said inaccessible centers, apart from acquired B influences (and in turn, I would guess, magnetic center when formed) that is really genuine in a person? What would it make sense to call Real? Hmm... Essence, emotional part of the lower self, is mechanical, and that of a selfish critter before developed, so it might not make sense to call "Real" either as it is. So given a lack of higher self, that leaves nothing, as far as I can see, until growth has progressed far.