Oregon Father’s Memorial Trek Across Country Ends in a Family’s Second Tragedy

[Lisa Guliani]

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/10/16/us/oregon-fathers-memorial-trek-across-country-ends-in-a-familys-second-tragedy.html?smid=fb-nytimes&WT.z_sma=US_OFM_20131016&_r=2&

DENVER — As he made his way across the country, Joe Bell walked through rain squalls, slept in ditches and talked to anyone who would listen about how his gay son had killed himself after being taunted and bullied at school.

[...]

But last Wednesday, Mr. Bell’s American journey — one that drew attention from local newspapers and attracted thousands of followers on social media — ended in an instant on a two-lane road in rural eastern Colorado. He was struck and killed by a tractor-trailer whose driver had apparently fallen asleep, the state police said.

 

[whitecoast]

Wow, that's really unfortunate. It's hard to believe in providence sometimes when bad things happen to good people so often. But maybe that's just self-importance again.

 

[Lilou]

This is a tragedy, but one really has to question why anyone would think walking from Oregon to NY is a good idea. Traveling across the USA, even under the best conditions, is difficult. This man must have been terribly distraught. It's a very sad story.

 

[Lisa Guliani]

I think I understand it. He was grieving. Maybe he looked at this journey not as a good idea,but as the only thing he could think of to do at that time. Maybe he felt he was to blame for his son's suicide and wanted to die too, for not being there or doing enough, in his mind, to prevent the suicide.
Maybe being alone with your grief is, for some of us, the only thing to do, to help you work through it.

I don't think it was a great idea either, but I think I can understand what he was trying to do, fwiw.

 

[Alana]

I think he was also trying to raise awareness in regards to bullying. He must have struggled a lot with thoughts of what he could have done to prevent it, and perhaps, sharing his son's story, was not only a memorial to him but also a way to prevent other suicides from gay young men/women. Perhaps his talks DID make a difference to someone's life.

It is so tragic what happened, especially for his family.

I think I understand him too. I also went on a very long walk once, trying to make sense of my life (internal and external).

May they both rest in peace.

 

[l apprenti de forgeron]

I think he was also trying to raise awareness in regards to bullying. He must have struggled a lot with thoughts of what he could have done to prevent it, and perhaps, sharing his son's story, was not only a memorial to him but also a way to prevent other suicides from gay young men/women. Perhaps his talks DID make a difference to someone's life.

It is so tragic what happened, especially for his family.

I think I understand him too. I also went on a very long walk once, trying to make sense of my life (internal and external).

May they both rest in peace.

I agree.
Really sad. I hope that "some day" he can be reunited with all their loved ones.

 

[Tigersoap]

Oh that's so sad...

 

[Thomas Alan]

I think he was also trying to raise awareness in regards to bullying. He must have struggled a lot with thoughts of what he could have done to prevent it, and perhaps, sharing his son's story, was not only a memorial to him but also a way to prevent other suicides from gay young men/women. Perhaps his talks DID make a difference to someone's life.

It is so tragic what happened, especially for his family.

I think I understand him too. I also went on a very long walk once, trying to make sense of my life (internal and external).

May they both rest in peace.

I agree.
Really sad. I hope that "some day" he can be reunited with all their loved ones.

Sometimes setting out on a long journey can be symbolic for a person of a quest for understanding. I hope he found the peace he was looking for. Sad but inspiring in a way.

Mac

 

[loreta]

This story touched me very much. I don't know, to see this man and his sadness, his impotence and his, surely, anger, and solitude. Walking and walking, meditating because walking is a sort of meditation, a therapy for him surely. And be killed by a car. This is a big tragedy, I think. And so symbolic in a sort of way, so sad and so strong. Did he learn something while walking in desert roads, under the sun, under the rain, under the immensity of the sky?

 

[supriyanoel]

As sad as it seems, it also is such an ultimate service to others. Going to any lengths, without lust for any personal gain, witnessing and sharing in such a magnanimous way is mindbogglingly.

It may appear foolish for the obvious hardships that are encountered, but he didn't seem to care of such things of the world, in my opinion. I can imagine what it must take to go on such a journey, and the connections that were made. Being moved to give this message of hope perhaps. SOMEONE had to have benefitted from the passion of this caring soul. Maybe his final lessons encompassed the taking on of this trip and released him in the most beneficial way to his lifetime here. It's work to take on and persist in this singular way. The way it looked may of had nothing to do with what it felt like to him. Possibly a release in a most ecstatic way for his soul. All just possibilities. Someone I would of been honored to meet.