Should I stay or should I go?

[EGVG]

Hi everyone! I hope you all are having wonderful days and have a very fun and loving new year's eve or day, and of course a great 2012.

So, I'm in so much doubt right now, tomorrow I'm supousted to leave for the beach 50 km away from the city, to a good friend's house. All of my friends are going, I have my bacon ready to go, my sunscreen and all... and then.... I hear that a certain individual is going too.

This group of friends is from my school, so I know most of them for over 10 years, they are my best and closest friends, the thing is, the arrival of a new school friend that has been living in another city at north. This other friend has never been particularly close to me, on the contrary we have always had problems, I used to really dislike him because of his huge ego and because he always had something to say and the things he says are not very clever or sensitive. A week ago, me and this group of friends had a Christmas dinner and we all gathered and drank so wine and talked and we had a great night, then this friend, started to talk about that hes takes 4 different prescription psychiatric pills because his pituitary gland is over exited and he can't feel emotions, or at least that's what I got. He explained this at the dinning table and everyone was like ....OKAY.... weird faces and rolling eyes. Later that same night this friend, broke into tears and started to yell, he was clearly drunk, he was very upset because he was not happy with the state of his life. Also like I mentioned, he has a huge ego, so he was also upset because he hasn't changed or made a significant difference in the world, to make it better in his terms and conditions.
More over, he is in a really bad place emotionally, just today when I found out he was coming too, I also found out that he had tried to kill himself with the Christmas lights just a few weeks back. My good friend that told me this also told me that this troubled friend has been diagnosed as a sociopath and bipolar.

So my big question is, should I go to this 7 day vacation with my friends and this individual with whom I have not a good relationship, or should I stay here in the city, safe and do whatever plan I can find and really just enjoy it without fear. After all the information about psychopaths, I do not take this kind of news lightly, I'm scared of him drunk, and I'm pretty sure there will be plenty of alcohol at the beach.

Please I need advice, I'm so weaked minded that I need advice for stuff like this. Please I trust and respect your guys opinions always.


Thanks

:)

 

[obyvatel]

Hi Starmie,
You seem to be having an emotional reaction to the news of this "friend" going for the vacation. Did you hear about this individual accompanying you all for the vacation today or have you known this for some time?

A vacation with friends is supposed to be a relaxing affair. If it is true that this person tried committing suicide recently, then I would be concerned about the safety of that individual and the whole group in a situation of your description. Alcohol is a no-no with many psychiatric drugs - eg lithium which is used for bipolar disorder. So if you feel unsafe and/or if your gut instinct is warning you of something, then I would say that it may be better not to go. You could also discuss this with your other friends if you think it will be appropriate. The final decision is best made from a position of careful deliberation and you really are in the best position to take that decision. So I would suggest calming down, doing some pipe breathing and then choosing the course of action that you think is most appropriate.

My 2 cents

 

[Laura]

Can't you just go and avoid this person? Geeze, he's sure renting a lot of space in your head! He doesn't sound like a psychopath, just somebody who's really got problems. If you can't deal with it, then hang out with the others and find that you have something to do if he approaches. Also, try to limit any of YOUR drinking!

 

[EGVG]

Thanks obyvatel and Laura for replying, I very much appreciate it. I've decided not to go, since I'm really scared of this friend. He is renting too much space in my mind if you ask me, so I prefer not to go and just forget about him. The beach house is not so big, so we will propably bump into each other a lot of times. Also I have decided not to go because this particular friend used to make fun of me as little kids and he used to call me fat, and that is the worst thing you can call me, is the word that hurts the most to me. Obviously programing. So now that I'm actually a little bit fat, going to the beach with this guy in the mix is not a good idea.

Thank you!! :)

 

[Brewer]

G'day Starmie!

I'd just go. Don't let people like this get you down. Don't drink too much and don't over react if this person tries to get a rise out of you. Have a contingency plan so you can bail out if the need arises. I don't know what drives this person but we've all encountered them at some time in our lives and it's useful to know how to deal with them.

Have a good time