Strange Response to ebay Auction - Comments Please

[ec1968]

Hi Folks

I should appreciate some feedback / views or comments on something that happened to me this evening.

A few days ago I spotted a set of Open University physics course books for sale on ebay. Ever since I lost my job due to illness, I have been doing a lot of studying, and last year began to redo all of the courses that I studied at university to get my physics degree back in 1991. So the OU books were of interest to me. I know from experience that OU text books and other course materials are usually of very high quality. So I decided that I would like to have them, and that I would bid on the auction.

I have a particular way of approaching ebay auctions. I decide in advance the maximum amount that I would be prepared to pay for the item I am bidding on. Then I wait until 1 minute before the end of the auction, and enter the maximum figure. Then I wait again until 20 seconds before the end, and then press the enter key. Ebay then takes my maximum amount, and makes automatic bids against all the other bidders, up to my maximum. Because I leave it to so close to the end, unless someone else has a maximum higher than mine, the strategy usually works well for me.

So I went through my normal process this evening. I decided that I would pay a maximum of £100 for the books (they cost £500 new from the OU bookshop). In the end I got them for £61. But, just as I was about to make my bid, my heart rate went through the roof, I got dizzy, my hands were shaking so badly I could hardly use the computer keyboard to complete the bid, and I was hyperventilating. Now, I am pleased that I won the auction and bought the books, but no way are they so important to me that the physiological response I had to the process was in any way warranted. That has never happened to me before, and I can't figure out why it occurred and if there was something more to it. It took me about 30 minutes to settle back to normal afterwards, and I found it very unsettling.

Has anyone any comments or suggestions to make as to what might have been going on with me, and why? I would appreciate any views at all.

Many thanks

Eúni

 

[Joe]

So I went through my normal process this evening. I decided that I would pay a maximum of £100 for the books (they cost £500 new from the OU bookshop). In the end I got them for £61. But, just as I was about to make my bid, my heart rate went through the roof, I got dizzy, my hands were shaking so badly I could hardly use the computer keyboard to complete the bid, and I was hyperventilating.

Hi Eúni, can you say whether or not this physiological response you had was associated with a mental anxiety or something similar about the bidding process itself? Or were you, psychologically, completely calm about it?

 

[Gawan]

These auctions can be very exiting imo and I have gone through myself, but maybe not that rough as you describe it. The first question that comes to my mind is: how is your diet going?

And then maybe try to prevent it for further auctions and make it a bid less stressful and enter your maximum bid several hours before the auction is ending or even from the beginning and then lets see what happens. I know your first thought may be that you may not win the auction this way, but when you entered your maximum and someone bids more, would you also bid more?

 

[Laura]

Auctions affect me, too. So maybe the physiological state you were in at the moment was already vulnerable and normal "auction flutters" were just exacerbated?

 

[Mrs.Tigersoap]

Even if it seems extreme, I think that this unfortunately common with this type of bidding technique: instead of following the auction and bidding incrementally, you wait the last few seconds, thereby preventing you to respond should anyone outbid you. This has the advantage to take other bidders by surprise (and in this case you win) or it totally backfires and someone beats you to the punch and you lose. It's all or nothing.

This is so stressful that your body probably releases adrenalin, which brings about the flight or fight response (and all that goes with it: rapid heart rate, breathing, etc.). You're not using that energy to flight or fight so you get light headed, you get numb, etc.

Basically, you are having a panic attack.

And I'm not even talking about the predator's mind in full hunger mode during these auctions.

My advice is to either use the normal gradual bidding technique or use the Buy Now option!
Alternatively, stop using eBay altogether if you do not have the nerves of steel for it. ;D

 

[Meg]

As others have said, it sounds like you were having magnified stress response probably due to the nature of auctions. :)

 

[seek10]

Even if it seems extreme, I think that this unfortunately common with this type of bidding technique:

I agree. I have been through this before. Conflicting thought patterns creates anxiety whether one likes or not, that's what body does. particularly under time pressure. One end you are not sure what you are doing is worth it or not, other end you are observing the anxiety wondering why you are feeling like that(so, some thing is wrong, but you can't stop the kick that comes out ). At the end one gets drained. At the end it is like bargaining-one will never get satisfied with ,even when one gets 2 for free, because one is not sure of real worth of it. Breathe and laugh at it

 

[elle]

I had have those too.Its like your heart beats faster than normal and you start to sweet profusely.Mines come with a terrible sensation and the idea that I am about to die.It happens to me a couple months ago and always at the most normal situations.What I do is just trying to keep control of my breathing and my thoughts, looking the situation from outside myself.Sometimes I sing and as soon as you put aside the fear mode they just gone.

 

[l apprenti de forgeron]

I agree. I have been through this before. Conflicting thought patterns creates anxiety whether one likes or not, that's what body does. particularly under time pressure. One end you are not sure what you are doing is worth it or not, other end you are observing the anxiety wondering why you are feeling like that(so, some thing is wrong, but you can't stop the kick that comes out ). At the end one gets drained. At the end it is like bargaining-one will never get satisfied with ,even when one gets 2 for free, because one is not sure of real worth of it. Breathe and laugh at it

Agree with that . Also related to the diet question of Gawan. A standard diet, compared with paleo or ketogenic, may can't handle the stress, or does in worse shape that paleo, and thus more difficult to control. But, what I mean is a little deeper. Maybe eating too much carbs (I'm not saying it's your case, Eúni. I don't know) could oversize trigger reactions to things that are simple and do not matter to much?

 

[l apprenti de forgeron]

I had have those too.Its like your heart beats faster than normal and you start to sweet profusely.Mines come with a terrible sensation and the idea that I am about to die.It happens to me a couple months ago and always at the most normal situations.What I do is just trying to keep control of my breathing and my thoughts, looking the situation from outside myself.Sometimes I sing and as soon as you put aside the fear mode they just gone.

Dissociate and sing can work well at the moment, I think. But I really believe that the secret is in the breath. That's what worked to me when it happened. Breathe deeply and slowly with the diaphragm (never with the chest). Also a good idea once made ​​aware this fear reactions can be controlled in this way, write it in a notebook in detail, how you have learned to overcome that. After all, we are always learning. :)

 

[H-KQGE]

Even if it seems extreme, I think that this unfortunately common with this type of bidding technique: instead of following the auction and bidding incrementally, you wait the last few seconds, thereby preventing you to respond should anyone outbid you. This has the advantage to take other bidders by surprise (and in this case you win) or it totally backfires and someone beats you to the punch and you lose. It's all or nothing.

This is so stressful that your body probably releases adrenalin, which brings about the flight or fight response (and all that goes with it: rapid heart rate, breathing, etc.). You're not using that energy to flight or fight so you get light headed, you get numb, etc.

I agree this "all or nothing" way will produce this effect & a rather extreme one in those susceptible to it. I don't know how gamblers continue for so long with their "all or nothing"/"laying it all on the line" approach.

Even if it seems extreme, I think that this unfortunately common with this type of bidding technique:

I agree. I have been through this before. Conflicting thought patterns creates anxiety whether one likes or not, that's what body does. particularly under time pressure.One end you are not sure what you are doing is worth it or not, other end you are observing the anxiety wondering why you are feeling like that(so, some thing is wrong, but you can't stop the kick that comes out ). At the end one gets drained. At the end it is like bargaining-one will never get satisfied with ,even when one gets 2 for free, because one is not sure of real worth of it. Breathe and laugh at it

I have to engage in all the recommended techniques advised here on the forum to get anxiety under control. All of those programs/small "I's"etc, conditioned responses affect some more than others, & if you're not already aware of it, this might help: http://cassiopaea.org/forum/index.php?topic=6419.msg44151#msg44151

If this is what happens under time constraints/pressure then an alternate method could be better suited.

I had have those too.Its like your heart beats faster than normal and you start to sweet profusely.Mines come with a terrible sensation and the idea that I am about to die.It happens to me a couple months ago and always at the most normal situations.What I do is just trying to keep control of my breathing and my thoughts, looking the situation from outside myself.Sometimes I sing and as soon as you put aside the fear mode they just gone.

Gone are the days when I was this bad (telling myself "I could die here") but increased heart rate in certain situations (learned programs, affect-intensity) & a recurring case of "the sweats" tells me a lot about myself & the specific situation. This is of course after doing some heavy-duty reading. So I now have tried & tested methods to employ.

I agree. I have been through this before. Conflicting thought patterns creates anxiety whether one likes or not, that's what body does. particularly under time pressure. One end you are not sure what you are doing is worth it or not, other end you are observing the anxiety wondering why you are feeling like that(so, some thing is wrong, but you can't stop the kick that comes out ). At the end one gets drained. At the end it is like bargaining-one will never get satisfied with ,even when one gets 2 for free, because one is not sure of real worth of it. Breathe and laugh at it

Agree with that . Also related to the diet question of Gawan. A standard diet, compared with paleo or ketogenic, may can't handle the stress, or does in worse shape that paleo, and thus more difficult to control. But, what I mean is a little deeper. Maybe eating too much carbs (I'm not saying it's your case, Eúni. I don't know) could oversize trigger reactions to things that are simple and do not matter to much?

As always, diet is a key component. Getting this under control whilst learning about the self & the relationships with the external environment yields (can if done properly & long enough) great results. I do think that carb quality and quantity is very important, as I have found out.

I had have those too.Its like your heart beats faster than normal and you start to sweet profusely.Mines come with a terrible sensation and the idea that I am about to die.It happens to me a couple months ago and always at the most normal situations.What I do is just trying to keep control of my breathing and my thoughts, looking the situation from outside myself.Sometimes I sing and as soon as you put aside the fear mode they just gone.

Dissociate and sing can work well at the moment, I think. But I really believe that the secret is in the breath. That's what worked to me when it happened. Breathe deeply and slowly with the diaphragm (never with the chest). Also a good idea once made ​​aware this fear reactions can be controlled in this way, write it in a notebook in detail, how you have learned to overcome that. After all, we are always learning. :)

Breathwork is fundamental & takes a lot of practice since people don't even breathe properly (the mental - emotional state, "buffers" etc e.g. holding in the stomach to look slim due to external pressures) & even the early stages (EE) helps a lot. Journaling & recapitulaion will also be greatly beneficial.

My advice is to either use the normal gradual bidding technique or use the Buy Now option!
Alternatively, stop using eBay altogether if you do not have the nerves of steel for it. ;D

All the above, even to me, lends insight into what "nerves of steel" are ;D & even though I would like to think that I could handle your bidding technique, I probably couldn't. There are more than enough stressors around. So this advice is worth considering IMO.

 

[Hildegarda]

This is so stressful that your body probably releases adrenalin, which brings about the flight or fight response (and all that goes with it: rapid heart rate, breathing, etc.). You're not using that energy to flight or fight so you get light headed, you get numb, etc. Basically, you are having a panic attack.

"Sniping" is my bidding strategy of choice too, and I get that way sometimes as well during the last few minutes of an auction. Sometimes but not always, for no rhyme or reason that I can see. Sometimes I get that way when writing a post or a comment online as well.

I guess it just means that in a crowd of people faced with something unexpected and scary, you would be one of the ones who reacts quickly by doing something rather then the one who freezes or does nothing. My understanding is that it's a temperamental and metabolic thing and rather hard-wired. I'm saying this because I've also got it really strongly when giving birth to my kids, and my labors are fast and furious (sorry if it is TMI).

I am not sure whether it can be compared to a panic attack, and I've had both. I associate panic and panic attacks with futility and being out of touch with one's body, whereas the "normal" fight-or-flight responses engages the body for a quick action.

Some breathing techniques, or distancing from caring about winning an auction, may help. Another thing would be simply to stand up and shiver, run in one place, or do jumping jacks, to burn off that adrenaline the way it's meant to be.

fwiw

 

[griffin]

Has anyone any comments or suggestions to make as to what might have been going on with me, and why? I would appreciate any views at all.

I hope others' responses have somewhat eased your mind that participating in an auction can cause anxiety and that's normal. It does sound like you experienced a physiological panic attack that made you rather uncomfortable for awhile, and others have suggested good ways to dissipate such stress.

I don't know you, Eúni, but I can conjecture as to why that auction caused you to have a panic attack and how you might avoid having another one in a similar situation, that is, another auction purchase.

I'd guess that your anxiety stemmed from two things. First, you really wanted that book, perhaps a little more than you thought, for whatever reason, so it was very important to part of you to win the auction. Second, although you'd decided on a price you could afford to pay and had entered your maximum bid, you were afraid that it might not be high enough to win the auction, and perhaps you second guessed yourself as to how much you really could afford to bid, thus you were worried that you might have bid too low. This would seem to be a natural hazard scenario surrounding auctions.

As it turned out, you won the auction at a price only 3/5 of your maximum bid, so you didn't have to face bidding that even approached your limit. That suggests to me that it was not the bidding itself that caused your panic attack, but just the fear that you might have set your maximum bid too low.

In the future, should you approach bidding in another auction, you might want to carefully assess how much you really want that item and set your maximum bid accordingly, such that you can walk away without regret if you're outbid and be able to tell yourself that it wasn't worth that much to you.

I'm glad you got the book you wanted, and at a good price.

 

[elle]

I had have those too.Its like your heart beats faster than normal and you start to sweet profusely.Mines come with a terrible sensation and the idea that I am about to die.It happens to me a couple months ago and always at the most normal situations.What I do is just trying to keep control of my breathing and my thoughts, looking the situation from outside myself.Sometimes I sing and as soon as you put aside the fear mode they just gone.

Dissociate and sing can work well at the moment, I think. But I really believe that the secret is in the breath. That's what worked to me when it happened. Breathe deeply and slowly with the diaphragm (never with the chest). Also a good idea once made ​​aware this fear reactions can be controlled in this way, write it in a notebook in detail, how you have learned to overcome that. After all, we are always learning. :)

Yes!! When singing you most use the diaphragm to alloy your voice goes Lauder and to produce the proper vibration.I'm not a singer but took drama classes at college (mmm now i understand why I did do!)
I'll take notes

 

[Mal7]

As a book dealer, I bid at physical (rather than online) auctions every week. Mostly I can do this running on auto-pilot, in my sleep. Occasionally if something special is coming up, my heart rate might go up a few lots before, and become even more elevated if the bidding is intense. I think it is a normal stress response / adrenalin kicking-in reaction, that can become a panic attack / anxiety attack if the system is "overloaded".

As for bidding on eBay, one tip for the best chance of getting what you want at the lowest possible price is to use sniping software. This is commonly used by many bidders, and is perfectly legal and not against any of eBay's rules. Sniping software places a bid for you in the last few seconds of an auction. You can set up your snipe bid hours or days before the auction ends, and then it will place the bid for you without you having to be around at the time of the end of the auction.

I use _www.esnipe.com. This is not a free service, but you only have to pay a small percentage on successful auctions that you win. If you lose, you don't pay anything. If you win, the esnipe fees are most likely less than the extra you would have paid by bidding without using esnipe. You can set esnipe to place its bid just 3 or 4 seconds before the exact second that the auction ends. Bidding this way manually would be risky, as you could end up timing your bid a second too late and missing out.

There is also a free sniping service _www.gavelsnipe.com, but it only places a bid 30 seconds before the auction ends, leaving quite a lot of time for other people to come in and place a higher bid if they are online.