The scotching of prejudice

[durabone]

I am wondering if any of you have had a similar experience as me?

Years ago, I found myself trying to catch a bus, and sit on the bench. It was crowded, so I didn't notice that the bench I aimed to sit on already held one person, a stinky filthy homeless man, elder than me. I hesitated, but checked myself. I did not want to be rude. So I nervously sat down.

What happened then was a very lively conversation. At one point about 20 minutes later, I realized that I had become both excited and animated. I observed in myself that I liked him. Forget the left brain logic and programs. Billions of years of refinement are at work here.

Now it has become a relished tradition. When I see myself repulsed by someone new, I sometimes have the opportunity to act. Look past it and dive in. Rarely have I been disappointed. Usually, I grow. Am I alone here?

 

[EricG]

I had a similair experience three years ago when we had travelled back from a holiday on our westcoast. I dont own a car so we rely on public transportation and we had to travel with the bus to The Hague and from there we took the train for the last part of our trip.

In the bus I sat alone and after 10 minutes we came to a stop were a shabby dressed man entered. The first thought when i saw him was "Please don't sit next to me!"...

Well the man walked up the middlepath and took a seat next to me...

I looked at him, he looked at me and he nodded friendly to me, so I nodded back. After a couple of minutes he turned his head and asked if he could ask me a question. I said yes, sure but still in my head I thought, "make it short, make it short".

He asked me what my ethnic background I was and I said Indo/Indisch (a mix of european and Indonesian descent)

Ahh he said "Indo Rock" and before I knew it we were talking about music, talking about our background (he was from Surinam) and talking about food, :D

We talked about where we lived and what we did for a living, he was retired so he talked a bit about how that was and talked about vacation.
He went to the Hague because that was vacation for him just to walk the city, visit the market there and so on.

I don't know how long we talked but time flew and before I knew it we arrived in the Hague. We all stepped out and my company and I went to the trainstation. Still standing at the bus we looked at each other and he wished me a good trip home, I wished him a good day in the Hague and a good trip back home.

I was thought a good lesson that day
"You can't judge the book by looking at the cover"

 

[angelburst29]

I'm of the opinion, never judge a book by it's cover! Of course, instinct comes into play, in any given situation. If you feel danger or threatened in any way, you act accordingly to protect yourself.

I was fortunate enough, to be brought up in a country setting, on a family dairy farm in the late 50's. Barter was still a way of life within the neighboring community, as was a handshake to seal a deal on trust. You can learn alot, by observing with an enquistive mind (seen but not heard) in social mannerisms.

I meet alot of hardworking, talented "down-home-folks" who treated you like one of the family and some, who would meet you with a muskeet - if you jumped the fence on their property. For the most part, folks were friendly and decent "God fearing people" who were too busy with survival, living off the land, taking care of family, chores and responsibilities.

The environment of hard work and long hours had a way of separating the "wheat from the chaff" so to speak. Those, who choose not to do their fair share of the work load or apprentice in a trade usually ran off to the glamore of street lights and City Life to make their fortune.

We come from all walks of life and experiance. Some more materialistic than other's. Generations of social enginerring have programmed us to judge the outside facade without accessing "the whole." In the normal scheme of things, life has it's up and downs.

What comes to mind, at the moment, is the show "Got Talent" when Susan Boyle walked on stage. Some in the crowd and even the Judges rating the performance gave the impression - she had nothing in talent to offer - until she began to sing. The shock on many faces including a heart felt apology by one of the female judges was priceless. But, even though they voiced their shortcomings, they couldn't "accept her" as a whole, from the inside out. They had to mold her into what they felt was acceptable in the outside packaging. First, it was her hair (cut and colored) and make-up (heavy red lipstick and eyeliner), wordrobe was updated to an Opera star. They excepted the voice but not the woman, herself and they couldn't figure out what made her lash out in desperation?