Whom to give C's material?

[ella]

The very basis of STO is to give only when asked. But for me it is not simple to distinguish, whether somebody really asks, or not. Since I started working with the Wave I meet few people who, after talking to me, ask for the link to C's material. Up to now whenever somebody asks, I give, but sometimes I feel a kind of resistance. Yesterday a "practitioner" from the "spiritual group" I used to belong to called me, asking why I left, what I do now etc. I told her something about it, and she immediately wanted me to give her a link. Generally I perceive this person as a very manipulative and self-deceiving person, with the strong need to "teach' and "help" others, also very committed to "rescuing" the world and she always seemed to be very comfortable in that place. I feel she called me just out of curiosity, and to get the sensational material to bring to the group.
And this case brought me to realization, that there is something I generally do not understand here. Is it right to say, that if she receives this knowledge, it could bring her (and maybe others) more harm then benefit or maybe my resistance only comes from the fact, that I personally do not like her? What would be STO choice here for me? I feel resistant to give C's information to everybody who comes, but then another thought comes to my mind: am I able and entitled to judge who is ready or who is not, or whether he/she is really asking or not.
It is very confusing for me, I need to deepen my understanding here, the more so that I expect other people from the group to appear with their questions soon.
Please, share your understanding with me.

 

[Laura]

First of all, why did you even answer the initial question about "why you left?"

As Gurdjieff said, sincerity with everyone is weakness. Just say "I've been busy" or "I just need a break."

One thing for sure, if you leave 4th way work, nobody will call you to ask you why.

 

[Carl]

Perhaps those who are 'ready' will stumble upon the C's material in much the same way that we did, in some kind of natural process. Then again, we are all parts of this natural process too, so sharing this information could be a role you play. I guess it is up to you to determine the nature of an individual before you point them to this material, and do so carefully. Try to determine whether their "asking" is a true STO form of asking. From your description, it sounds more like aggressive digging for information.

I am currently facing a similar situation in which I am watching my close friend and flatmate advance along a similar path of truth seeking that I followed (I found a copy of "The Secret" in his room). I have not yet linked him to the C's material but have been gently giving out some information that I have learned from this network, whenever I decide he is 'asking'.

Too much info, too soon would cause problems in understanding and turning the information into knowledge, and could even be negative for somebody's growth and learning IMHO.

 

[Jacques]

The very basis of STO is to give only when asked.

I guess it is up to you to determine the nature of an individual before you point them to this material, and do so carefully. Try to determine whether their "asking" is a true STO form of asking. From your description, it sounds more like aggressive digging for information.

Indeed, that is true but under that basis thing is the fact that you must know when someone is really asking.

Would you give a gun to someone who is asking it to you if you know that he will use it to kill someone ?

 

[Nienna]

Jasminum, here are a couple of things to read. These are 4th Way concepts, Strategic enclosure and external consideration.

As Laura said, you don't, and shouldn't, be sincere with everyone. There is the Law of 3, "There is good and there is evil and the specific situation that determines which is which.

Maybe it would be good, if you haven't already, to read Ouspensky's In Search of the Miraculous.

 

[Alada]

I guess it is up to you to determine the nature of an individual before you point them to this material, and do so carefully. Try to determine whether their "asking" is a true STO form of asking. From your description, it sounds more like aggressive digging for information.

Indeed, that is true but under that basis thing is the fact that you must know when someone is really asking.

Maybe we can extend the thought a little here when considering whether a person is asking. Perhaps sometimes we just leave the thought at 'well they're not really asking', but if it isn't asking, then what is it? Sometimes people are just making conversation, to 'be nice' or whatever, but often people are being manipulative in their 'asking'. It sounds or appears one way on the surface but at the root of it is manipulation.

The STO way as I understand it is to refuse the manipulation. But here one ought to be cautious, wise as serpents and gentle as doves. External consideration comes into play so one might choose to say something sensible rather than 'I'm not answering that, you're just trying to manipulate me to get what you want/to feed'. As Laura mentioned, sincerity with everyone is a weakness.

There is also the question of our own self importance/ego sometimes. I mistakenly used to imagine that all sorts of people were interested in the same ideas, that they were asking for information, when really it was just my self importance wanting to show off, shove ideas at people, be 'cool' for having all these new ideas. The predators mind you can be sure will find ways to weave such things into any conversation when it thinks there's something in it for itself. It will even convince us that a person is asking, and so, we must 'share'!

Try keeping silent at times, when ideas occur that are just bursting to be spoken and 'shared', and maybe you will see something of the PM working.

 

[ana]

One thing for sure, if you leave 4th way work, nobody will call you to ask you why.

It made me remeber of what Needleman says regarding the difference between a cult and a genuine spiritual path.

"A cult is very easy to get into but very hard to get out of it, a real spiritual path of awakening is hard to get into but very easy to leave, you really have to want it".

 

[Mrs. Peel]

I am currently facing a similar situation in which I am watching my close friend and flatmate advance along a similar path of truth seeking that I followed (I found a copy of "The Secret" in his room). I have not yet linked him to the C's material but have been gently giving out some information that I have learned from this network, whenever I decide he is 'asking'.

Here's a red flag for ya. ;) Whenever YOU decide he is asking? I know the New Agers are really hard to "convert" (believe me, in times gone by before I really grokked the free will thing I was determined to show them the error of their ways!) because they are so focused on Love, Light and Positive stuff. My friends were/are into the Secret and any other New Age fad that comes along. I have finally stopped "showing" them what was wrong with that thinking, and just let them be. It's really hard and I have to practically bite my tongue when they get all excited about spending $100+ on an Akashic records reading from some new, famous psychic.

If you've mentioned the Cs material in passing, if your friend has a genuine interest, he'll find it on his own.

 

[liffy]

If you've mentioned the Cs material in passing, if your friend has a genuine interest, he'll find it on his own.

This.

If someone is sincerely interested in what has been talked about, then they'll certainly be able to make the sufficient searching effort of finding the material without it being handed to them.

 

[David Topi]

Or you simply get the word in passing. I was told, "you ought to read the books of Laura Knight, her material will resonate a lot with you", and so I went searching who was that Laura without any other pushing or influence by the person who recommend it

 

[Carl]

I am currently facing a similar situation in which I am watching my close friend and flatmate advance along a similar path of truth seeking that I followed (I found a copy of "The Secret" in his room). I have not yet linked him to the C's material but have been gently giving out some information that I have learned from this network, whenever I decide he is 'asking'.

Here's a red flag for ya. ;) Whenever YOU decide he is asking? I know the New Agers are really hard to "convert" (believe me, in times gone by before I really grokked the free will thing I was determined to show them the error of their ways!) because they are so focused on Love, Light and Positive stuff. My friends were/are into the Secret and any other New Age fad that comes along. I have finally stopped "showing" them what was wrong with that thinking, and just let them be. It's really hard and I have to practically bite my tongue when they get all excited about spending $100+ on an Akashic records reading from some new, famous psychic.

If you've mentioned the Cs material in passing, if your friend has a genuine interest, he'll find it on his own.

I see what you mean. I never try to push an idea on somebody but I sometimes do subtle things like leaving books around and I've noticed his interest in a few. Also since I've started smoking again and gone completely paleo, I often get comments such as "smoking is bad you know", "you'll have a heart attack from all that fat", "you need carbs to live!" etc. I generally just dismiss their comments and say something along the lines of "go research it if you want". Most people don't of course but the more open minded one is starting to entertain new ideas more :)

 

[ella]

Thanks a lot, all of you :D
That is exactly what I needed to hear and what I wanted to hear, because this is what I really felt inside. My problem was that I did not fully trust my feelings and my judgment, and I needed confirmation. Otherwise oftentimes, when I felt something, like “get lost” towards somebody, my mind (PM?, program?) started telling me: “And how can you be sure about that? And if you are wrong?”
Now I feel free from the must of helping everyone and I feel so much lighter, such a big load had fallen from my back :). And from the time I came here is not the first one. I just can’t stop laughing and I just need to tell you that. The feeling of freedom is growing in me every day.
I really do appreciate your help.

One thing for sure, if you leave 4th way work, nobody will call you to ask you why.

It made me remeber of what Needleman says regarding the difference between a cult and a genuine spiritual path.

"A cult is very easy to get into but very hard to get out of it, a real spiritual path of awakening is hard to get into but very easy to leave, you really have to want it".

And this, no doubt, I understand very well :)

 

[ashu]

I know the New Agers are really hard to "convert" (believe me, in times gone by before I really grokked the free will thing I was determined to show them the error of their ways!) because they are so focused on Love, Light and Positive stuff. My friends were/are into the Secret and any other New Age fad that comes along. I have finally stopped "showing" them what was wrong with that thinking, and just let them be. It's really hard and I have to practically bite my tongue when they get all excited about spending $100+ on an Akashic records reading from some new, famous psychic.

Here here, I know the feeling. I briefly mentioned some material (eg the Love, Reality and Time of Transition video) to a friend (fan of The Secret) who seems to be focused solely on love and light in hope that she would absorb some of the information. But no, it appears she did not :(