Carlybee
Padawan Learner
Hi guys,
I just got back from Phuket Thailand with a friend I’ve known for 10 years but never traveled with before. She has depression and is quite negative by nature but didn’t think that would have an effect on me or our holiday at all. Anyway, weeks leading up to leaving I began feeling or sensing something not bad but a slight gut feeling about the trip that I couldn’t put my finger on, I thought it must have been a random anxiety of flying but I have never had that before and have been to 19 other countries and never feared flying. I knew something wasn’t going to go well on the trip as I had the gut feelings beforehand and random dreams and events prior.
Almost as soon as we landed I felt an intense heavy energy about the place like it was restricting my chest, I blamed it on the humidity. 2 days went by and everything was fine until I borrowed a Thai ladies pair of sandals to get home one night as I only had sneakers on, on that one walk home the next day in between my big and second toe where the sandal had rubbed I got a blister so I went and purchased ones that go over the foot as Im sensitive between the toes and cant normally wear those kind of toe shoes.
Anyway we went on a tour to Phi Phi island and went snorkeling, while I was walking out in the turquoise water to explore the fish life I tread on a piece of dead coral, right where my blister was. The next day I began to feel very weak and my heart rate began to go up and blood pressure right down. Anyway I actually came home early after 3 ongoing days of this terrible response I was experiencing as I ended up having huge panic like attacks, with shaking, twitching and pins and needles in my hand, hyperventilating waking in the night shivering and sweating with a racing heart, really bad diarrhea, vertigo, extreme weakness and crying from exhaustion, I felt a constant adrenaline like surge through my body/bloodstream which continued thru the nights also, my tummy swelled right up like it was full of air, and found it hard to do deep breathing let alone E.E all of which I have never experienced abroad as I have traveled to 19 countries and never felt that panicky or adrenaliney before. I have had anxiety before but always due to some circumstance and never on this scale with all those horrible physical symptoms. It could have been many things like a reaction from the foot cut or maybe it was the humidity, or my low blood pressure, doing too many activities or the recent separation from my soon to be ex husband sinking in I’m not sure, but it felt very horrible and it wasn't going away after 2 days of dealing with it so I made the decision to just get home asap which I was upset at myself for being too weak to ride it out what ever the heck it was.
I haven't told my friends I came home early because I’m still trying to work out what the heck all this emotion and strong physical symptoms were, I know I can be prone to anxiety since my Mother died when I was 19 but this had a stronger physical element to it that came very suddenly without warning. Id really like to know about how to fix whatever I’m going through so I can move forward from this experience but it certainly did have a totally unexpected element to it outside myself that I cant put my finger on. If anyone has any insights I’d really appreciate it. But at least the racy heart and panic subsided almost as soon as I arrived back to my home but I certainly don’t want to have to go through that again, the foot I can deal with but the strength of the sudden physical and emotional attack came out of the blue and I really did feel like I was being attacked as the energy was sooo intense and strong. In the meantime I will meditate and try and get my deep breathing back to normal. I had to see a doctor once I landed as my foot was so swollen I had to remove my shoe and the swelling was moving up my leg, so I have some strong antibiotics and it has gone right down now, but I am still extremely weak and still a bit baffled and freaked out by the whole experience.
Ps: I did manage to have some fun on my holiday though :)
I just got back from Phuket Thailand with a friend I’ve known for 10 years but never traveled with before. She has depression and is quite negative by nature but didn’t think that would have an effect on me or our holiday at all. Anyway, weeks leading up to leaving I began feeling or sensing something not bad but a slight gut feeling about the trip that I couldn’t put my finger on, I thought it must have been a random anxiety of flying but I have never had that before and have been to 19 other countries and never feared flying. I knew something wasn’t going to go well on the trip as I had the gut feelings beforehand and random dreams and events prior.
Almost as soon as we landed I felt an intense heavy energy about the place like it was restricting my chest, I blamed it on the humidity. 2 days went by and everything was fine until I borrowed a Thai ladies pair of sandals to get home one night as I only had sneakers on, on that one walk home the next day in between my big and second toe where the sandal had rubbed I got a blister so I went and purchased ones that go over the foot as Im sensitive between the toes and cant normally wear those kind of toe shoes.
Anyway we went on a tour to Phi Phi island and went snorkeling, while I was walking out in the turquoise water to explore the fish life I tread on a piece of dead coral, right where my blister was. The next day I began to feel very weak and my heart rate began to go up and blood pressure right down. Anyway I actually came home early after 3 ongoing days of this terrible response I was experiencing as I ended up having huge panic like attacks, with shaking, twitching and pins and needles in my hand, hyperventilating waking in the night shivering and sweating with a racing heart, really bad diarrhea, vertigo, extreme weakness and crying from exhaustion, I felt a constant adrenaline like surge through my body/bloodstream which continued thru the nights also, my tummy swelled right up like it was full of air, and found it hard to do deep breathing let alone E.E all of which I have never experienced abroad as I have traveled to 19 countries and never felt that panicky or adrenaliney before. I have had anxiety before but always due to some circumstance and never on this scale with all those horrible physical symptoms. It could have been many things like a reaction from the foot cut or maybe it was the humidity, or my low blood pressure, doing too many activities or the recent separation from my soon to be ex husband sinking in I’m not sure, but it felt very horrible and it wasn't going away after 2 days of dealing with it so I made the decision to just get home asap which I was upset at myself for being too weak to ride it out what ever the heck it was.
I haven't told my friends I came home early because I’m still trying to work out what the heck all this emotion and strong physical symptoms were, I know I can be prone to anxiety since my Mother died when I was 19 but this had a stronger physical element to it that came very suddenly without warning. Id really like to know about how to fix whatever I’m going through so I can move forward from this experience but it certainly did have a totally unexpected element to it outside myself that I cant put my finger on. If anyone has any insights I’d really appreciate it. But at least the racy heart and panic subsided almost as soon as I arrived back to my home but I certainly don’t want to have to go through that again, the foot I can deal with but the strength of the sudden physical and emotional attack came out of the blue and I really did feel like I was being attacked as the energy was sooo intense and strong. In the meantime I will meditate and try and get my deep breathing back to normal. I had to see a doctor once I landed as my foot was so swollen I had to remove my shoe and the swelling was moving up my leg, so I have some strong antibiotics and it has gone right down now, but I am still extremely weak and still a bit baffled and freaked out by the whole experience.
Ps: I did manage to have some fun on my holiday though :)