Change within the work

[lunar7]

This is a complex topic as childhood traumas can create a deficit for the human coming into an age where they have control over themselves, something they had no choice or control over, at such an early age. In this case the step to recognize and heal these traumas is already a huge one that most people never take.

When they do not, trauma chains spanning many generations can snowball and create monsters, but we must not forget that this chain spanned between a series of newborn babies displaced in time who were each completely malleable and without any deficit other than that which was passed to them physically via their genes and subconscious imprints from generations prior.

And so traumas are a combination of nature and nurture as the subconscious bakes in some of them in an attempt to avoid the same causes-for-fear of previous generations, but at the same time nurtured traumas cause the same loss of self-control of the previous generations which has exactly the opposite effect - generating conflict rather than avoiding it.

Most likely few people grow into adulthood with zero deficit of these kinds, and not recognizing them and healing them can slow the maximum possible comfortable rate of any other type of positive change.

Beyond that, it seems to be the case that the best approach is to define oneself by one's capacity for continuous positive change in an abstract manner, without focusing too much on specifics. We can let serendipity point us continuously to the most suitable areas for improvement and continue to do so at a rate that matches our capacity for daily self-reflection.

The last aspect worth mentioning is how much of a suitable environment we manage to create for ourselves to do this kind of work, because it is a process that can put us at odds with the modern status quo, which celebrates the shortening of attention spans and is in many ways the exact opposite of this process, creation an illusion of perpetual busyness, far too busy to possibly do this kind of work.

This is where alternative communities such as this one are so helpful. It is a shame such communities can never seemingly be allowed to blossom to encompass a majority of the population, but we hardly control the parameters of our own civilization anyway - hopefully someday we will be able to.

 

[Resistense]

It’s very hard to accept who you use to be or who you were!
To change you have to see yourself after you are a new self or else have you really changed?

how does one see an old self if they haven’t changed into a new self yet because they haven’t fully seen their old self?

I believe to progress you have to see enough of yourself during a transformative time your BUFFERS need to be on a cigarette break in order to see enough of your old self to solidify your new self! Leading to more of a perminent change or leading to enough momentum/energy to spark change

- My recent experience in the work and in life.

Looking over some notes from "Gnosis I", these quotes seem to apply:



Romance project came to mind there. As we see ourselves in others, empathize, and learn from them (whether characters in a novel or real people we have interacted with), we begin to change. As we change, our values change. Perhaps then we may start really noticing how a new self is forming by comparison. I think it is necessary to see the old self, or at least remember the old self, to see the change(s) taking place. It's a process, ongoing. The more pieces that are collected, the clearer the picture becomes.





I am by no means out of the woods with this, and expect to make mistakes. How else would I learn? I find the mistakes to be valuable, as long as something was learned. Looking back on it later if no lesson was learned, value can still be found with added knowledge that wasn't available at the time the mistake occurred. I find it very useful to compare an older version of myself with the person I am today, because that is how I find the progress/changes that have occurred. It is so very gradual at times! The comparison helps tremendously to find the next step, or next way to improve on an aim.


Quotes from Nicholl:




Perhaps taking responsibility is a better term, as you stated, than "altering memory", and helps to cancel debts from the past. It is balancing to see the unpleasant in oneself as in others, at least this works for me when I find myself irritated by some action someone has taken or something they have said. That can be another way of seeing the change from "old self" to "new self". Aren't we always changing with each new experience? There isn't a definite end to the learning, as the C's say the universe is a school, all there is lessons.

Ouspensky "The Fourth Way"


Each day presents a new opportunity to do something better.

Paraphrasing material I believe from P.D Ouspenskii, The Fourth Way:

It may come that you have to start the work over from square 1:
OBSERVATION
Take "snapshots" of your composite being whilst in the midst of your mechanicality. Accumulate these and you have material to scrutinize...

However, it is advised NOT to try to make changes early -- because we cannot account for how this may cause unwanted effects. I think also it is difficult to measure perceieved change, as we tend to deceive ourselves.

 

[SovereignDove]

Part of what I was considering in the viewing of a former self to the current self is through writing, as in a journal. There is a more concrete version of the older self held there. This only works if journaling and writing has become a practice

I do consider memories, and most of the Work involves memory. I agree with you memory is mostly, but not always deceiving. That is why we need evidence of our former selves to measure any real growth or difference. And it opens a path to viewing yourself. The results then depend on how good your memory truly is in comparison to photos, other's accounts and memory, writings, and feeling. The mind is not the best evidence to weigh a change or difference, although it is possible to see it in the mind, and to feel it, but without the purposeful self created story line everything can become muddled and harder to discern where growth has occurred.

The growth is what is important, and perhaps the only purpose of viewing the past actions, aside from learning from those experiences. FWIW

 

[SovereignDove]

Paraphrasing material I believe from P.D Ouspenskii, The Fourth Way:

It may come that you have to start the work over from square 1:
OBSERVATION
Take "snapshots" of your composite being whilst in the midst of your mechanicality. Accumulate these and you have material to scrutinize...

However, it is advised NOT to try to make changes early -- because we cannot account for how this may cause unwanted effects. I think also it is difficult to measure perceieved change, as we tend to deceive ourselves.

I meant to reference your post in response but forgot to hit that button!

 

[Resistense]

Part of what I was considering in the viewing of a former self to the current self is through writing, as in a journal. There is a more concrete version of the older self held there. This only works if journaling and writing has become a practice

I do consider memories, and most of the Work involves memory. I agree with you memory is mostly, but not always deceiving. That is why we need evidence of our former selves to measure any real growth or difference. And it opens a path to viewing yourself. The results then depend on how good your memory truly is in comparison to photos, other's accounts and memory, writings, and feeling. The mind is not the best evidence to weigh a change or difference, although it is possible to see it in the mind, and to feel it, but without the purposeful self created story line everything can become muddled and harder to discern where growth has occurred.

The growth is what is important, and perhaps the only purpose of viewing the past actions, aside from learning from those experiences. FWIW

I agree that a journal, especially if founded on work principles, would be valuable.

I do not intend to convey that memory is mostly, but not always deceiving. I think you are alluding to "impressions", which I think is what we record with "memory", so to speak, and I think there is potentially great accuracy in the record. Rather, I would phrase a question to @Menna first post as, "What is the purpose of this measurement you're making? Of this comparison between "then" and "now"?"

Furthermore, it is difficult to tell whether or not this exercise is simply one 'i' seeing another 'i', making a comparison, and declaring progress. When in reality the level is the same. The work continues, you have an aim and are making efforts, and do not know when or if you will have time to rest, and check your notes. Instead I think you reproach yourself and undertake the next task.