Good to hear that you're "ready for battle" again, Laura.
There are moments when I feel that this "PTSD" is overwhelming, and I wish I'd taken the blue pill instead, but then I remind myself of how I wouldn't want to be one of those people who can't see anything of what's going on, who aren't at all prepared, and who believe every lie the MSM present. At times, it feels like enjoying life becomes harder by the minute – like in the Matrix, the cost for being awake is to eat that horrible porridge every day – but it would be against our nature to give in, and believe the illusion.
I mostly worry about my children; they are too young to have any awareness of what's going on...how will they cope when things get really rough, how can I protect them. However, it's a good reminder to think about how the children (and adults) in those hot spots like Syria must feel (we can't even start to know the horror), when bombs are being dropped at them every day. That must be horrible! And, fighting against that kind of senseless, pathological aggression is one of the things that keeps me going. I don't think we can change the course of the world, not with things being as they are right now, but we can perhaps make things a little better, here and there. I'm reminded of what Gurdjieff said, how in order to things to change everything needs to change. So, I guess we need a big shock, be it comets, economical collapse etc.