flaw in the mirror

Faith

Faith

The Living Force
FOTCM Member
Hello everyone :) (I hope I won't regret it)

During my second encounter with the forum-members, I was mirrored by Anad. It was shocking! It was like falling down, staring at my wounded knee. Mme de Salzmann helped me up. There are things out there, that just work without my theories, without your explanations! I am realizing, that there are things, that happen without us. Its the great IT or whatever you wanna call it. The Outside World!

I am small. I am lonely and I am scared. He is ignorant, narcissistic and brutal. I know he tries to protect us, but he is not me. I don't want to be ungrateful. Those programmes... IIII have difficulties to respect myself. I have difficulties to respect you! Imperfection or what I believe perfection should be. Something has let me astray. Truth is, I have not the faintest idea of what is going on. Turns out, that I have no wisdom to share. But I won't give up!

That is what can be observed. It seems to be an ongoing struggle. Observing me, those PROGRAMMES and him. After I was mirrored successfully, I turned out to be even more narcissistic, especially when I tried to be wise and truthfull.

Personally I am interested in concepts of "high strangeness". I like to create strange new worlds for the benefit of entertainment and, if possible, for the benefit of new thinking. I am working as a concept-designer (or concept-artist, if you will). "High strangeness" is related to the awesome work of Dr. Hynek. When I read "The Wave", there were many inspiring descriptions of what people claimed to have experienced during a close encounter of the strange kind. Some of those descriptions refer to odd and rather "unrealistic" fairytailes. (I like those ;))

I would like to know from the Cassies, if that is even possible: "What does "fantasy", "imagination" and "stream of conciousness-kind-of-ideas" mean, concerning the realms of higher-densities. (I guess, if I 've posed the wrong questions ;)) I want to know where I am standing and what responsibilities I can assume. Right now I am imagining concepts of dreamlike, sense aesthetic (German: sinnästhetisch), fractal-pattern-kind of concepts for science-fiction- and fantasy-sujets. Is there anything I am sensing, that is related to the bizarre truth or am I just dreaming of being awakening? Is there an objective kind of ART out there? I am sorry, if those questions bother you. I am FLOETUS, you know ;)
 
Re: flaw in the miror

Sorry, I meant the forum-member "Anart" and yes, there is a an "r" missing in the title. :P
 
Re: flaw in the miror

floetus said:
I am small. I am lonely and I am scared. He is ignorant, narcissistic and brutal. I know he tries to protect us, but he is not me. I don't want to be ungrateful. Those programmes... IIII have difficulties to respect myself. I have difficulties to respect you! Imperfection or what I believe perfection should be. Something has let me astray. Truth is, I have not the faintest idea of what is going on. Turns out, that I have no wisdom to share. But I won't give up!
Click to expand...

Who is 'he'? And what are you talking about? This post is quite cryptic.

floetus said:
I would like to know from the Cassies, if that is even possible: "What does "fantasy", "imagination" and "stream of conciousness-kind-of-ideas" mean, concerning the realms of higher-densities. (I guess, if I 've posed the wrong questions ;)) I want to know where I am standing and what responsibilities I can assume. Right now I am imagining concepts of dreamlike, sense aesthetic (German: sinnästhetisch), fractal-pattern-kind of concepts for science-fiction- and fantasy-subjects. Is there anything I am sensing, that is related to the bizarre truth or am I just dreaming of being awakening? Is there an objective kind of ART out there? I am sorry, if those questions bother you. I am FLOETUS, you know ;)
Click to expand...

Floetus, whatever you mean by the above, I don't feel like you are showing much consideration for your audience -- I know you are a second-language English speaker, but I don't think that's the main problem here. Can you try to start over and state a bit more coherently what you are trying to communicate?
 
Re: flaw in the miror

I think it's probable that from floetus's point of view, this post is just a continuation, more or less, from here. The full context may be helpful in this case.
 
Re: flaw in the miror

Buddy said:
I think it's probable that from floetus's point of view, this post is just a continuation, more or less, from here. The full context may be helpful in this case.
Click to expand...

Yes, that helps a bit (thanks Buddy) -- but I have to admit I can't follow. Why is floetus talking as if there are two of them?
 
Re: flaw in the miror

floetus said:
I am small. I am lonely and I am scared. He is ignorant, narcissistic and brutal. I know he tries to protect us, but he is not me. I don't want to be ungrateful. Those programmes... IIII have difficulties to respect myself. I have difficulties to respect you! Imperfection or what I believe perfection should be. Something has let me astray. Truth is, I have not the faintest idea of what is going on. Turns out, that I have no wisdom to share. But I won't give up!

That is what can be observed. It seems to be an ongoing struggle. Observing me, those PROGRAMMES and him. After I was mirrored successfully, I turned out to be even more narcissistic, especially when I tried to be wise and truthfull.
Click to expand...

Like Shijing, I also don't understand what you mean by "he". Perhaps this "he" is a dissociative personality as described by Martha Stout in Myth of Sanity? Could you please clarify?

floetus said:
Is there an objective kind of ART out there? I am sorry, if those questions bother you. I am FLOETUS, you know ;)
Click to expand...

Regarding objective art, you may want to read the Possitive Dissociation thread :)
 
floetus said:
I would like to know from the Cassies, if that is even possible: "What does "fantasy", "imagination" and "stream of conciousness-kind-of-ideas" mean, concerning the realms of higher-densities. (I guess, if I 've posed the wrong questions ;)) I want to know where I am standing and what responsibilities I can assume. Right now I am imagining concepts of dreamlike, sense aesthetic (German: sinnästhetisch), fractal-pattern-kind of concepts for science-fiction- and fantasy-sujets. Is there anything I am sensing, that is related to the bizarre truth or am I just dreaming of being awakening? Is there an objective kind of ART out there? I am sorry, if those questions bother you. I am FLOETUS, you know ;)
Click to expand...

Hi floetus

What I know is that above 3D, physicality is no longer stable especially at 4D. The C's called it "variable physicality". And above 4D, well physicality doesn't even exist as we know it, the C's (6D) once described themselves like this "we are by no means physical". So I guess the only thing remaining at higher densities is consciousness, awareness, thoughts, dreams and so forth. They even told Laura that we exist only because someone else (God?) dreamt us up. However, our (3D) dreams and fantasies are highly related to "internal consideration", and if we lose ourselves in them we build a perception of the world based on subjectivity. This is not good, and this is exactly what Laura and team are trying to snap us out of. But it's ok to dream when it's used for recreation, Laura calls it "Positive Dissociation" in this thread:

http://www.cassiopaea.org/forum/index.php?topic=14103.0
 
floetus said:
Hello everyone :) (I hope I won't regret it)

During my second encounter with the forum-members, I was mirrored by Anad. It was shocking! It was like falling down, staring at my wounded knee. Mme de Salzmann helped me up. There are things out there, that just work without my theories, without your explanations! I am realizing, that there are things, that happen without us. Its the great IT or whatever you wanna call it. The Outside World!

I am small. I am lonely and I am scared. He is ignorant, narcissistic and brutal. I know he tries to protect us, but he is not me. I don't want to be ungrateful. Those programmes... IIII have difficulties to respect myself. I have difficulties to respect you! Imperfection or what I believe perfection should be. Something has let me astray. Truth is, I have not the faintest idea of what is going on. Turns out, that I have no wisdom to share. But I won't give up!
Click to expand...

Hi floetus, it seems to me that the most significant aspect of your first mirror here was your response to it. You stopped your mechanical thinking for a moment and considered external input, took it to heart and - for a moment - changed your perception of yourself and how you relate to the world, as represented by this forum. Please understand me when I say that was no small thing.

The vast majority of people, when they are presented a mirror that does not match their own perception of themselves balk, get angry, refuse to listen and go on the attack to prove the mirror incorrect, in defiant defense of their own false personality. You didn't do that and this indicates that you have potential, because it is only through understanding that we are/know nothing that we can proceed and learn.

In other words, it's perfectly normal to have not the faintest idea of what is going on - what matters it that you continue to search for the Truth, within and without.

f said:
That is what can be observed. It seems to be an ongoing struggle. Observing me, those PROGRAMMES and him. After I was mirrored successfully, I turned out to be even more narcissistic, especially when I tried to be wise and truthfull.
Click to expand...

That's also normal - it is a struggle, a daily battle to self-observe, spot programs and Work through them to get to the Real you. It is a way of life, a spiral staircase that, at times, seems to move backwards or even stand still, all the while progress is being made.

If you are not doing the EE breathing and meditation exercises, I strongly recommend it because it affords your subconscious an opportunity to actively join in the struggle, so to speak. It's powerful and will help 'clear your eyes to see' yourself, and all else, more clearly.

f said:
Personally I am interested in concepts of "high strangeness". I like to create strange new worlds for the benefit of entertainment and, if possible, for the benefit of new thinking. I am working as a concept-designer (or concept-artist, if you will). "High strangeness" is related to the awesome work of Dr. Hynek. When I read "The Wave", there were many inspiring descriptions of what people claimed to have experienced during a close encounter of the strange kind. Some of those descriptions refer to odd and rather "unrealistic" fairytailes. (I like those ;))
Click to expand...

If you've not read Laura's book 'High Strangeness' - then I think you'd really enjoy it.

f said:
I would like to know from the Cassies, if that is even possible: "What does "fantasy", "imagination" and "stream of conciousness-kind-of-ideas" mean, concerning the realms of higher-densities. (I guess, if I 've posed the wrong questions ;)) I want to know where I am standing and what responsibilities I can assume. Right now I am imagining concepts of dreamlike, sense aesthetic (German: sinnästhetisch), fractal-pattern-kind of concepts for science-fiction- and fantasy-sujets. Is there anything I am sensing, that is related to the bizarre truth or am I just dreaming of being awakening? Is there an objective kind of ART out there? I am sorry, if those questions bother you. I am FLOETUS, you know ;)
Click to expand...

Well, getting lost in a dream land of fantasy because it seems to be fun and more exciting and attractive than the reality of our own lives/selves is quite the enormous trap and quite common, actually. While there can be inspiration found in such things, through positive dissociation, if one uses fantasy and imagination to routinely escape or to make oneself feel special or to block out 'real' life, then there is a problem.

The fact of the matter is that our own minds, when opened and cleaned, provide more creative stimulation than can be found in lifetimes of being lost in a dreamland of fantasy. Our reality is more bizarre than we can imagine - and to see the truth of that, one must be able to See, which brings us back to the Work and the EE breathing and meditation program. Our minds are our main tool to decipher this 'place' - this world - this reality, in all it's seemingly infinite manifestations of the bizarre, fantastic and mundane. If you really want to be blown away, 'clear your eyes so you can See' - the breathing and meditation program will jump start that process, if you've not yet begun to practice it, do so! :)
 
Yes, I do regret it :|

I should have mentioned that this is indeed a continuation of my last post. Apparently I felt so important yesterday, that I was simply assuming that you already know my history very well. I was not aware of that. Puh, that's rough! I am dealing with a program called self-importance.


Floetus, whatever you mean by the above, I don't feel like you are showing much consideration for your audience -- I know you are a second-language English speaker, but I don't think that's the main problem here. Can you try to start over and state a bit more coherently what you are trying to communicate?
Click to expand...

This is exactly what I was trying to avoid: talking about me and me alone, using cryptic words to camouflage my pointlessness, disregarding the others. Until this post, I 've been successfully resisting the desire to post those narcissistic blatherings. I dumped them all except for this one. It slipped through my fingers. :zzz: Fortunately this is not the worst one. This is what I ´ve meant when I wrote: "After I was mirrored successfully, I turned out to be even more narcissistic, especially when I tried to be wise and truthfull" :-[


Its quite obvious to me. Maybe I´ve really seen something that day, but instead of developing true humbleness, I again try to use it for being important and special. I want to show everyone how very special I am. Please confirm! Same old, same old. Shame on me! Its a fragging loop.


Like Shijing, I also don't understand what you mean by "he". Perhaps this "he" is a dissociative personality as described by Martha Stout in Myth of Sanity? Could you please clarify?
Click to expand...

Please forget my pseudo-schizophrenic self-portrayal, those big and oily words of mine, baroque frames with nothing in it! I am melodramatic, again. This is driving me crazy! Maybe I should change my nick name: "Heh, I am Lou Ping, again" :P


Yeah, and thanks for the tip. Its everything there, I guess. "Watch before you think before you post". I got it :)
 
Thanks for the encouragement, Anart :)

So maybe there is a new life waiting for me, that I can hardly see, at least not just yet. Some years ago one of my hard-drives suddenly crashed without having made a backup. Everthing was lost: my diary, my studies and my concepts, gone. I was shocked and then I was angry but then I felt somehow relieved. You could say I felt free. Sometimes its not a bad thing to loose your treasure, isn't it? On the contrary :)

I will start the breathing program right now. I even wanted to start it right after our last thread but I did not, due to my lack of discipline. I started the German translation of High Strangeness but I had to stop after the first chapter because the complete translation is still in progress. Maybe I should start the English one :) I am curious. I will also read the thread about Positive Dissociation. Maybe I should not regret it after all :)
 
Floetus, thanks for the clarification in your posts today. With that in hand, your initial post in this thread makes more sense to me now. Good luck with the E-E program -- I think you will find it a very positive experience :)
 
floetus said:
I will start the breathing program right now. I even wanted to start it right after our last thread but I did not, due to my lack of discipline. I started the German translation of High Strangeness but I had to stop after the first chapter because the complete translation is still in progress. Maybe I should start the English one :) I am curious. I will also read the thread about Positive Dissociation. Maybe I should not regret it after all :)
Click to expand...

I am glad to see that you are not giving up! One thing to realize, you cannot get over your programs all at once. It takes Work to first see the programs running. Then, it takes more Work to see the programs starting. All you need to do at first is self-observe, although this is not an easy thing to do - that's why it is called the Work. Once you see the programs running and then you notice them right after they start. Then, you can actually feel them start up and after a while, you can stop them from running.

It doesn't happen overnight, or in one mirror session. It takes time. Step by step. But seeing you being receptive to the mirror and anart's suggestions is very encouraging.

And, I totally agree, the EE program is seriously important. I hope that you will do this consistently. It is amazing what it can do.
 
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