High Strangeness of August 09

[ava]

Just wanted to report how everything ended.

I wasn't able to block the number (my new phone even refuses to block calls) and the guy did send yet another message few days ago, so I finally gathered strenght (think advice from MC played a big part in it) and replied him saying that he has no business in sending me these messages, cause I didn't ask him to, nor is it his to offer me unwanted help, added (this part probably wasn't the wisest, but I couldn't help myself) how he should perhaps study the field of telepathic communication a little bit more thoroughly, cause who knows who is contacting him and for what purpose, as it doesn't have to be good (since he calls himself a psychic and in contact with god), and finished with a pleading that he never ever tries to contact me again, cause I really don't want him to.

Of course he answered (ignoring my plea), erased it, but it was something like - how I am naive and don't know anything, nor is my place to know, but he knows that god has special plans for me (on that place he wrote my full name and the place of my birth, which I was foolish enough to give him back then - guess to make a better impression, or he thought I didn't remember I gave him that), bla, bla (it was a very long message, as always).

Then I answered again saying just that I am repeating once again I don't want him to ever contact me again in any way, that he is terrorizing me, and if he doesn't stop I will be forced to change my number.

And again his answer, how he loves me, how god loves me (bla, bla something, forgot), but fine, he won't be sending messages again (now he is doing me a favor, you know), still, he can see I will be the one who will eventually contact him again, after other things (delusions, wrong ways, something like that) fail me.

I didn't answer anything else and hopefully it's over for good.


And now, in the end, I am convinced this guy just has a serious mental problem (if that can be called just).

But still, this whole thing was so, so nasty and manipulative.
And honestly, I don't exactly know how I would've dealt with it at any prior point in my life (I'm not that sure I wouldn't have 'bought' the tale once again).

Anyway, it definitely was extremely disturbing, so I'm really glad it's over.
And perhaps someone else can learn something from it too.

 

[truth seeker]

And that felt even worse, it wasn’t comforting at all, it just felt like a big intrusion into my mind.

First of all, I'm so sorry that this happened to you. I think this is a very telling statement and in my opinion you should trust your feelings about this.

But the whole thing was still somewhere in my mind, so today when I woke up, I was looking around forum trying to find something similar, or even a place where it would be appropriate to share this - and I got texted again.

What happened to you reminds me very much of some types of mind programming. Have you read the material on these pages?
http://www.cassiopaea.org/cass/wave11h.htm

I'm not saying that this is what's happened in your situation but only suggest the material to give you some perspective on the types of people who are walking around and the methods they use to draw people in.

So that is why I decided to definitely write it now, as it is so strange and I don’t exactly know what to think of it.
I am also puzzled by my strong negative reactions.
What is this person’s agenda. Is there one, or is it just help I’m not is sync with.

In my opinion, I think there is an agenda to control you and have you dependent upon this person. The fact that you felt sexually uncomfortable is interesting and reminded me of a situation with someone that led me to feel the same way. When I spoke with someone who was sexually abused (and I'm in no way suggesting that you have been) he told me that it sounded as if the person was trying to groom me. Here's the definition:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_grooming

Just wanted to report how everything ended.

I wasn't able to block the number (my new phone even refuses to block calls) and the guy did send yet another message few days ago, so I finally gathered strenght (think advice from MC played a big part in it) and replied him saying that he has no business in sending me these messages, cause I didn't ask him to, nor is it his to offer me unwanted help, added (this part probably wasn't the wisest, but I couldn't help myself) how he should perhaps study the field of telepathic communication a little bit more thoroughly, cause who knows who is contacting him and for what purpose, as it doesn't have to be good (since he calls himself a psychic and in contact with god), and finished with a pleading that he never ever tries to contact me again, cause I really don't want him to.

Of course he answered (ignoring my plea), erased it, but it was something like - how I am naive and don't know anything, nor is my place to know, but he knows that god has special plans for me (on that place he wrote my full name and the place of my birth, which I was foolish enough to give him back then - guess to make a better impression, or he thought I didn't remember I gave him that), bla, bla (it was a very long message, as always).

Then I answered again saying just that I am repeating once again I don't want him to ever contact me again in any way, that he is terrorizing me, and if he doesn't stop I will be forced to change my number.

And again his answer, how he loves me, how god loves me (bla, bla something, forgot), but fine, he won't be sending messages again (now he is doing me a favor, you know), still, he can see I will be the one who will eventually contact him again, after other things (delusions, wrong ways, something like that) fail me.

I didn't answer anything else and hopefully it's over for good.


But still, this whole thing was so, so nasty and manipulative.
And honestly, I don't exactly know how I would've dealt with it at any prior point in my life (I'm not that sure I wouldn't have 'bought' the tale once again).

Anyway, it definitely was extremely disturbing, so I'm really glad it's over.
And perhaps someone else can learn something from it too.

Just some thoughts:

If he contacts you again (this includes running into him in the street), I would let him know at that point in time that I was reporting him to the police for harassment and then follow up on it. Don't listen to, but save the messages (if he continues to call) so that you have proof for the police. Also if it's not too much trouble for you, you may want to consider changing your number.

I'm sensing (and please correct me if I'm wrong) that this person has some ability to hook you. The reason I think this is because you answered after he called back. If you find that this is the case, you may want to examine this. Of course, you may have just been thrown off by the situation which is completely understandable.

Actually, I'll go further with my assessment above in terms of agenda. In my opinion, this person is a predator. I think this because more than once, this person has disregarded your wishes by repeated contacts whether by phone or in person. When someone does this, they're trying to control you.

The last thought is actually a question. When you saw this person for that year, what exactly did this person do for you? If you don't want to talk about this, please don't feel obligated. I just find it unusual that someone would provide any service for that amount of time with nothing in exchange.

I hope this helps.

 

[Oxajil]

Hi ava,

Some good advice has been giving to you, this is just fwiw:

I wasn't able to block the number (my new phone even refuses to block calls) and the guy did send yet another message few days ago, so I finally gathered strenght (think advice from MC played a big part in it) and replied him saying that he has no business in sending me these messages, cause I didn't ask him to, nor is it his to offer me unwanted help, added (this part probably wasn't the wisest, but I couldn't help myself) how he should perhaps study the field of telepathic communication a little bit more thoroughly, cause who knows who is contacting him and for what purpose, as it doesn't have to be good (since he calls himself a psychic and in contact with god), and finished with a pleading that he never ever tries to contact me again, cause I really don't want him to.

Why did you reply to him anyways and tell him that? Do you truly think that anything would change if you told him that? That he will understand everything of what you say in the way you understand it? Best is to never reply to him anymore. That's what I would do. edit: Ah I see MC asked you. Well I think that it only works in some cases if you tell someone to stay away, that they will. But it doesn't work with everyone, I guess it was worth the try. Sorry.

Of course he answered (ignoring my plea), erased it, but it was something like - how I am naive and don't know anything, nor is my place to know, but he knows that god has special plans for me (on that place he wrote my full name and the place of my birth, which I was foolish enough to give him back then - guess to make a better impression, or he thought I didn't remember I gave him that), bla, bla (it was a very long message, as always).

It's interesting that such people always seem to collect and save such personal info somewhere.

Then I answered again saying just that I am repeating once again I don't want him to ever contact me again in any way, that he is terrorizing me, and if he doesn't stop I will be forced to change my number.

Well I think he would contact you some day again, so the best you can do is to change your number and what truth seeker suggested about calling the police might also help.

 

[ana]

I am also puzzled by my strong negative reactions.

Well, maybe that means instinct is working properly and according to the situation experienced.

Just wanted to report how everything ended.

I wasn't able to block the number (my new phone even refuses to block calls) and the guy did send yet another message few days ago, so I finally gathered strenght (think advice from MC played a big part in it) and replied him saying that he has no business in sending me these messages, cause I didn't ask him to, nor is it his to offer me unwanted help, added (this part probably wasn't the wisest, but I couldn't help myself) how he should perhaps study the field of telepathic communication a little bit more thoroughly, cause who knows who is contacting him and for what purpose, as it doesn't have to be good (since he calls himself a psychic and in contact with god), and finished with a pleading that he never ever tries to contact me again, cause I really don't want him to.

Of course he answered (ignoring my plea), erased it, but it was something like - how I am naive and don't know anything, nor is my place to know, but he knows that god has special plans for me (on that place he wrote my full name and the place of my birth, which I was foolish enough to give him back then - guess to make a better impression, or he thought I didn't remember I gave him that), bla, bla (it was a very long message, as always).

Then I answered again saying just that I am repeating once again I don't want him to ever contact me again in any way, that he is terrorizing me, and if he doesn't stop I will be forced to change my number.

And again his answer, how he loves me, how god loves me (bla, bla something, forgot), but fine, he won't be sending messages again (now he is doing me a favor, you know), still, he can see I will be the one who will eventually contact him again, after other things (delusions, wrong ways, something like that) fail me.

I didn't answer anything else and hopefully it's over for good.


And now, in the end, I am convinced this guy just has a serious mental problem (if that can be called just).

But still, this whole thing was so, so nasty and manipulative.
And honestly, I don't exactly know how I would've dealt with it at any prior point in my life (I'm not that sure I wouldn't have 'bought' the tale once again).

Anyway, it definitely was extremely disturbing, so I'm really glad it's over.
And perhaps someone else can learn something from it too.

I am glad for you too!!

 

[ava]

First of all I would like to thank everyone on your suggestions,
and I'll try to answer the questions.

What happened to you reminds me very much of some types of mind programming. Have you read the material on these pages?
http://www.cassiopaea.org/cass/wave11h.htm

I'm not saying that this is what's happened in your situation but only suggest the material to give you some perspective on the types of people who are walking around and the methods they use to draw people in.

Did read it, but a while ago, so I’ll read it again now, thanks for the suggestion.

In my opinion, I think there is an agenda to control you and have you dependent upon this person. The fact that you felt sexually uncomfortable is interesting and reminded me of a situation with someone that led me to feel the same way. When I spoke with someone who was sexually abused (and I'm in no way suggesting that you have been) he told me that it sounded as if the person was trying to groom me. Here's the definition:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_grooming

I agree. And there definitely were signs of grooming. It was like - I know you feel uncomfortable when I touch you (not indecent kind of touching, but still), that's normal, you are a woman, but you do have to get more in touch with your sexuality
(and when he said that the last thing on my mind was getting in touch with my sexuality, and the first was to run away as fast as I can).

Actually, I'll go further with my assessment above in terms of agenda. In my opinion, this person is a predator. I think this because more than once, this person has disregarded your wishes by repeated contacts whether by phone or in person. When someone does this, they're trying to control you.

I would say now that I don’t have a single doubt he's a plain predator.

The last thought is actually a question. When you saw this person for that year, what exactly did this person do for you? If you don't want to talk about this, please don't feel obligated. I just find it unusual that someone would provide any service for that amount of time with nothing in exchange.

No problem.
I already wrote how I was in a poor mental state back then, and the first thing I remember was my friend starting to talk a lot about this person she met, and that he was asking for me and wanted to see me.
So I went (I would've gone to see anyone at that point in time, I think). I guess what I really needed was a therapist, and what I got was this guy who would sit me down in his room for about an hour or so, I wouldn't normally say more then few words (nor was he asking me anything), he would just keep talking and talking (about god, about energies, as I mentioned occasionally telling me what he 'saw' has happened or will happen).
Since he was a 'healer', he included that hand part (giving me energy, or more likely taking mine), as I already mentioned I think, he was a Christian 'kind', so he never mentioned Reiki or things like that, but he did talk a lot about chakras, how I should visualize breathing from different parts of my body depending on the day of the week something,...
Now, he was going around as sort of a spiritual healer and I knew he did receive money for it, but he told me I don't have to pay him anything (I was a student and didn't have any money anyway), so I guess he saw me as an investment in future.

But to mention again, this part, me seeing him, wasn't really the biggest problem, I saw him little more than few times, didn't like it and stopped it.
It was the part that he refused to let me go.

And for me, I wasn't 100% sure, even though I was sure I don't want to see him again, that there isn't at least a slight (very slight, but large enough to leave impression, even though negative, after the messages would arrive) possibility he's really onto something and that I may be making a mistake refusing him.

But that's sorted now. Uhhh, it is. (Like, that moment you realize, jeez, what the heck was wrong with me.)

I'm sensing (and please correct me if I'm wrong) that this person has some ability to hook you. The reason I think this is because you answered after he called back. If you find that this is the case, you may want to examine this. Of course, you may have just been thrown off by the situation which is completely understandable.

Why did you reply to him anyways and tell him that? Do you truly think that anything would change if you told him that? That he will understand everything of what you say in the way you understand it? Best is to never reply to him anymore. That's what I would do. edit: Ah I see MC asked you. Well I think that it only works in some cases if you tell someone to stay away, that they will. But it doesn't work with everyone, I guess it was worth the try. Sorry.

I think, for my peace of mind at least, answering (and this was the first and the last time I ever did it) was the thing that helped me the most to get rid of him.
Hook definitely was there (for some reason), but being afraid of him wasn't helping in getting him out, and with trying hard just to ignore him, I may have even made the things worse (again, I am speaking about mental state and suppressing rather than dealing with it).

And now, seeing how he answered me (as I was just getting his side before, which always can be interpreted on various ways), without any consideration for my direct plea and still just blabbing the same old, same old, in a way broke the mystery (or ‘spell’) around him and simply just showed him for what he really is.

Well I think he would contact you some day again, so the best you can do is to change your number and what truth seeker suggested about calling the police might also help.

I don't think it matters much any more.


Anyway, thanks again to all of you. I kind of felt a bit silly for making such a fuss about this, as it is my personal stuff, but you really helped me to deal with it, and before I started writing, I wasn't even aware to what proportion the whole thing was really bugging me.

 

[henry]

Well I think he would contact you some day again, so the best you can do is to change your number and what truth seeker suggested about calling the police might also help.

I don't think it matters much any more.

Hi Ava,

Maybe you could elaborate a little more on why you "don't think it matters much any more". I had some alarm bells going off when I read that, but, hey, maybe it is just me. It just struck me that you were lowering your guard here and not taking into account that this guy is a predator.

 

[truth seeker]

I agree. And there definitely were signs of grooming. It was like - I know you feel uncomfortable when I touch you (not indecent kind of touching, but still), that's normal, you are a woman, but you do have to get more in touch with your sexuality
(and when he said that the last thing on my mind was getting in touch with my sexuality, and the first was to run away as fast as I can).

I completely understand what you mean here. What you're probably picking up on is the intention behind the touching as well as the general inappropriateness of the touching. In all healthy relationships (in my opinion), there is an asking (whether spoken or not) that comes prior to touching. The person being touched then gives their permission (also prior to being touched). This happens regardless of how innocent the touch appears.

One thing I've begun to notice concerning psychopathic/narcissistic behaviors is that one of the methods sometimes employed is either an action or words are used to throw a normal person off balance...

No problem.
I already wrote how I was in a poor mental state back then, and the first thing I remember was my friend starting to talk a lot about this person she met, and that he was asking for me and wanted to see me.
So I went (I would've gone to see anyone at that point in time, I think). I guess what I really needed was a therapist, and what I got was this guy who would sit me down in his room for about an hour or so, I wouldn't normally say more then few words (nor was he asking me anything), he would just keep talking and talking (about god, about energies, as I mentioned occasionally telling me what he 'saw' has happened or will happen).
Since he was a 'healer', he included that hand part (giving me energy, or more likely taking mine), as I already mentioned I think, he was a Christian 'kind', so he never mentioned Reiki or things like that, but he did talk a lot about chakras, how I should visualize breathing from different parts of my body depending on the day of the week something,...
Now, he was going around as sort of a spiritual healer and I knew he did receive money for it, but he told me I don't have to pay him anything (I was a student and didn't have any money anyway), so I guess he saw me as an investment in future.

But to mention again, this part, me seeing him, wasn't really the biggest problem, I saw him little more than few times, didn't like it and stopped it.
It was the part that he refused to let me go.

And for me, I wasn't 100% sure, even though I was sure I don't want to see him again, that there isn't at least a slight (very slight, but large enough to leave impression, even though negative, after the messages would arrive) possibility he's really onto something and that I may be making a mistake refusing him.

But that's sorted now. Uhhh, it is. (Like, that moment you realize, jeez, what the heck was wrong with me.)

Thanks so much for taking the time to explain what happened. Also every one makes mistakes. Regular people don't think the way predators do and so it can be difficult for us to imagine that someone would act in this manner when we ourselves wouldn't.

I think, for my peace of mind at least, answering (and this was the first and the last time I ever did it) was the thing that helped me the most to get rid of him.
Hook definitely was there (for some reason), but being afraid of him wasn't helping in getting him out, and with trying hard just to ignore him, I may have even made the things worse (again, I am speaking about mental state and suppressing rather than dealing with it).

And now, seeing how he answered me (as I was just getting his side before, which always can be interpreted on various ways), without any consideration for my direct plea and still just blabbing the same old, same old, in a way broke the mystery (or ‘spell’) around him and simply just showed him for what he really is.

Got it. I've definitely had my problems standing up to people. It definitely takes practice.

Anyway, thanks again to all of you. I kind of felt a bit silly for making such a fuss about this, as it is my personal stuff, but you really helped me to deal with it, and before I started writing, I wasn't even aware to what proportion the whole thing was really bugging me.

Not at all! Try not to be so hard on yourself. I'm so glad to hear you're okay!

 

[ava]

Well I think he would contact you some day again, so the best you can do is to change your number and what truth seeker suggested about calling the police might also help.

I don't think it matters much any more.

Hi Ava,

Maybe you could elaborate a little more on why you "don't think it matters much any more". I had some alarm bells going off when I read that, but, hey, maybe it is just me. It just struck me that you were lowering your guard here and not taking into account that this guy is a predator.

I meant on the fact that the real danger in my case was his lure, his messages would in fact reach me on some level and would stick somewhere in my mind (cause if they didn't, I wouldn't have really cared that some spiritual wacko from my past is trying to contact me from time to time, and would've been able just to ignore him completely), and that part was his only power.

Now, if he really does it again, I have that realization he's not a psychic (who can perhaps sense I'm not feeling well or something, so there's a chance his help offer is genuine), but a psycho with a completely different agenda, so he cannot in any way reach my mind any more (physical danger was never an issue here anyway).