Geeze, @Tuatha de Danaan that's terrible. Wising you a speedy recovery regardless of what needs to be done, or not done. I think it's amazing that you actually typed at all!
what a lovely thought chu. yes please to reiki but if there are others more in need please see to them. just got back from the hospital and am feeling very grizzly. if the pain eases off i'll give details later but a quick shout out to everyone for their concern. many many thanks and virtual hugs.
I have been feeling exactly the same. I used to get up at least 3x times and go to the bathroom just in case I finally asleep and was waked up by full bladder. Didn't happen, it is very hard to sleep continuously. Now, I wake up even more often but decided not to get up until morning. Did it change something, I don't know. The stress level is very high but I can't seem to pause and look inside. I compensate wit tv, food, smoke (things external which don't give me any respite).
Wishing you a speedy recovery @Tuatha de Danaan.
Perhaps our 4D STS 'friends' aren't much in favour of your rebelling against their 'authority'!
Me too, I woke up at night. I was tired in the morning and all day long, my muscles ached. And I also felt anger towards everyone who had ever hurt me. I have the impression that they are trying to get us where they want us. I started taking higher doses of magnesium and after two weeks it's better.Me too, 3am, give or take a few minutes, and I don’t go back to sleep. I don’t always remember what I’m dreaming about, constant sleep deprivation making me foggy (more than usual, by the end of the day reading is very difficult, words moving around on the page or screen)
Your dream is interesting. I’ve been having bouts of real anger and resentment towards anyone who has ever wronged me, including myself, mostly directed towards my parents, though others too, misusing their authority in an abusive and neglectful way. I know everything that’s ever happened is all part of a design by 4DSTS to keep us locked in our own prisons and the resentment I feel is reinforcing that prison, it’s feels like me kicking and screaming that I want out, ‘you can’t keep me hostage, you don’t have power over me’
Both of my parents in the last 2 weeks on separate occasions mocked me when I told them about how I’m struggling with life situations re lack of sleep and having a sick partner. My Dad straight out said ‘toughen up princess’ (I heard him but not on the level he meant it) and my mum purposely directed her compassion elsewhere as a joke when I said all I’m after is some empathy, I’m not asking for some solutions.
They are separated for 42 years but acted in such similar ways that it made me think something was working through them. Dad goes on to say his great his life is and he has no complaints and then mum messages me after getting back from a holiday to tell me how tired she is… WTF ??¿
Anyway, lots of my own shizzle to work though. I believe your dream holds a lot of significance and is very very close to the truth of the distortion we are in.
Thanks for sharing
What I've noticed lately is more and more old people everywhere, in the street, in stores, on buses. And fewer and fewer children. So when I see children, I take my time to look at them; they're so beautiful. Old people are also beautiful because they're still there, present; most of them walk with difficulty. At certain times, they're young teenagers, their cell phones in their hands. The panorama changes when you go downtown to where the big brand-name stores are; there, beautiful women walk, heads held high. It's another planet. There are several planets on this earth, just as there are several dimensions. There are borders within the same city, worlds that don't meet. There are Greek tragedies in old homes, but also dogs that walk happily to show us that life is beautiful, that smells are fantastic, that breathing is good. I've visited the hospital several times for tests for my husband, and there too it's a big market of pain, injured bodies, missing legs, old people who will soon die. Hospitals are an interesting city to visit, a city within a city. A hive. A labyrinth that is a mirror and despair. Anyway, personally, all this doesn't stop me from getting up every morning happy to see my dog on my bed.
I have had this resentment building up too and also woke up at 3 yesterday which is unusual for me. When I realized I had resentment it was easier to work with and I feel like waking up at night to process helped. I used prayer to ask for help. Today I feel a lot better and the resentment is changing into something else, understanding perhaps. A funny thing was that I "heard" an old Swedish saying in my mind when I was awake at night and pondering, a saying I haven't heard in years. It goes something like this: "To love, forget and forgive is the great riddle of life" (Att älska, glömma och förlåta, det är livets stora gåta).Me too, 3am, give or take a few minutes, and I don’t go back to sleep. I don’t always remember what I’m dreaming about, constant sleep deprivation making me foggy (more than usual, by the end of the day reading is very difficult, words moving around on the page or screen)
Your dream is interesting. I’ve been having bouts of real anger and resentment towards anyone who has ever wronged me, including myself, mostly directed towards my parents, though others too, misusing their authority in an abusive and neglectful way. I know everything that’s ever happened is all part of a design by 4DSTS to keep us locked in our own prisons and the resentment I feel is reinforcing that prison, it’s feels like me kicking and screaming that I want out, ‘you can’t keep me hostage, you don’t have power over me’
Both of my parents in the last 2 weeks on separate occasions mocked me when I told them about how I’m struggling with life situations re lack of sleep and having a sick partner. My Dad straight out said ‘toughen up princess’ (I heard him but not on the level he meant it) and my mum purposely directed her compassion elsewhere as a joke when I said all I’m after is some empathy, I’m not asking for some solutions.
They are separated for 42 years but acted in such similar ways that it made me think something was working through them. Dad goes on to say his great his life is and he has no complaints and then mum messages me after getting back from a holiday to tell me how tired she is… WTF ??¿
Anyway, lots of my own shizzle to work though. I believe your dream holds a lot of significance and is very very close to the truth of the distortion we are in.
Thanks for sharing
